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Friday, July 29, 2005
1:13 am
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When we caught our first glimpses of Big Brother 6, a lot of people were worried. We saw all of the beautiful people and lamented at how boring they would all be. We learned that each of the houseguests would have a partner going into the house and decided that it was the dumbest twist ever, made only worse when we learned that the whole thing was going to be wrapped into what the producers were calling “Summer of Secrets.” Yes, my confidence wavered a little bit – until I remembered a few things. First, the house was full of humans, and whenever you get enough of us in one place, we make sure to destroy everything in sight. Second, I was still going to get a healthy dose of Julie Chen, and that is plenty to keep me happy for the summer.This post is a special one for TVgasm. Notice the number. 1000! Well, technically, it’s not 1000 because some entries were deleted and their numbers were just skipped, but I don’t want to count. I have to say that I am very happy to be able to share the 1000th post with Julie Chen. Some people have e-mailed me to let me know that Julie Chen is on five days a week, if only I would watch the early show. And sure, if I wanted my time with Julie to be boring, I could take her in every day, but then Big Brother just wouldn’t be the same, now would it?
It was the fourth week of our summer Chenwatch, and she seemed a little bit more composed that day, at least with her speech. Her wardrobe was a different matter. We opened up the show by zooming in on Julie, looking very crisp in a white pantsuit. We love Julie’s pantsuits because she can do them in so many ways, and it’s always our best chance for a little camel toe. Sadly, the camel toe did not make an appearance today, which makes it four weeks of live Julie without the knuckles coming out. It could be a record, but she did make up for it. I was thinking that there must be a plumbing problem in her house, because she had her pants tied up like she was ready for a flood. Maybe she was back from some humanitarian work in India. Who knows? The Chelmet was also out of sorts. She usually keeps those locks under control, but she had cowlicks flying everywhere today. The Chenbot maintenance team is going to be scolded for such oversights.
Maybe the frayed hair was due to some frayed wiring, because as Julie told us she was going to take a look inside the house, she looked over and reacted like the television wasn’t supposed to be there. She looked back at the camera and continued her line, telling us we would be right back. And the biggest surprise? No “But First!” during the opening segment. Oh, for shame.
Hasn’t this week been absolutely perfect? I think that it is fair to say that most of us in the gasmverse have a little bit of hatred for Eric, and you know, even I felt bad about making fun of him and accusing him of using steroids, beating his wife, and having small genitals. But then Eric opens his mouth, and I’m not sorry anymore. When talking about being nominated, Eric said it didn’t surprise him in the least, and that his enemies weren’t even worthy of his “eyesight” (or his hat, in James’ case)! What the hell is that supposed to mean? Uh, Eric, about 90% of the population is saying the same for you.
And in case those type of comments didn’t have me questioning Eric’s sanity, he continued with a lot of other great observations. For instance, after the nominations, he didn’t want to talk to anybody. OK, fine. Even though you told everybody all week it wasn’t personal, but were clearly the person taking it as a personal insult more than anybody else, you are entitled to your space. But do you have to be such a dumbass? Sarah wanted to say something, perhaps to you, know, show some sportsmanship, but Eric wasn’t having any of it. He told Sarah that she should just give him respect. Oh Eric, you meant like all of that respect you showed everybody in the house while you were HOH? Lead by example, captain.
As if that wasn’t dumb enough, Eric proceeded to tell Sarah “Don’t piss in my ear and tell me it’s raining.” The phrase is “Don’t piss on my leg and tell me it’s raining.” Judge Judy put it in on the cover of book. The only other person I have heard use the phrase like that is Karen from Big Brother 5. It kind of makes you wonder what other sayings Eric might like to say. “Don’t shit where I eat, because I might think it’s cake;” “Don’t jizz on my cupcakes and tell me it’s frosting;” “Don’t stick a shampoo bottle in my ass and tell me I’m getting a prostrate exam;” or the ever-popular “Don’t put my hand in a blender and tell me it’s chili.” I am also getting sick of Eric and his stupid jerseys and hats. Vegas Fire. Yes we know, it’s hot in Vegas and you are a firefighter, so it’s a double dose of irony when you wear the shirt, but damn! Instead of buying up a hat or t-shirt from eveyr single fire engine company that has ever seen, try spending $20 at the GAP. They have these things called “polo shirts,” and they can even mellow out an idiot like you.
Now, we all know that Eric is as dirty a player and as big of a backstabber as anybody in the game, arguably for much smaller reasons than Kaysar had thought. Sarah made it a point to say how he’s not living by his word, but you see, it was Kaysar who made the oath. I didn’t see Kaysar put his hand on a Koran, or say “I swear to God” or “I swear on my life,” but if Eric remember it, it must be true. Sexual harassment, blasphemy, he just doesn’t need much evidence. April tries to calm him down by saying that he should worry and that Eric’s decision is going to be between him and his maker. WHAT?! Yeah April, I’ll be waiting for the Imam in Orange County to issue a fatwa against lying to midget infidels. Not gonna happen.
Things calmed down a little bit, although Eric even found time to accuse Ivette of being in on the plan, which says as much about Eric’s paranoia as it does about Kaysar’s method of springing this nomination out of nowhere. But seriously, you had to know that Eric was going to be a goner, and with that knowledge, and a little bit of an attempt by the producers to cause some misdirection, we started hearing Maggie and Eric talk about how everybody was making a big mistake and that she was the smarter player. Perhaps this is true and perhaps Maggie was laying low waiting to strike. We’ll just have to wait until she wins HOH to see if she’s just talking bullshit or not.
It was now time for Julie’s little talk with the houseguests. She had the normal question to James, asking what a roller coaster ride it was for him. After then the funniest thing happened. While Julie was waiting for a response, she sort of stuck her tongue out and licked her lips, perhaps believing it was east coast time and the muscle memory was telling her she should be smooching with Les. As amusing as that was, the funniest part of the sequence was when she talked to April about PB&J. April said she hated it because she lost some weight, but she didn’t just say she lost some weight, she made sure to say “I entered the house about 108″ and that she may be down to 102. Well, I am not so sure how much she weighed, buy do you honestly believe she was 108? We all know that she has lost weight, but it’s not from PB&J, it’s just the natural effects of osteoporosis. I think she was just retaining more water since menopause, so she is just noticing the weight coming off now.
Julie finally asked a question to Beau, probably realizing the rest of the country was thinking about an Amber Alert since we haven’t seen him in so long. Beau is gay, so of course he gets a fashion question. Instead of “who has the most fashion sense?” (he said Ivette) or “the worst fashion sense” (Eric and Howie), why don’t you ask “So, the producers think you are boring and never show your face during the week. Is this because you are autistic or gay?” Sorry, that makes no sense, I was imagining how it would go if Ivette was trying to do the same thing. Finally, we get to Howie. Julie asks him to spell “rhubarb.” Oh, I can’t wait! Howie is so funny, everybody is going to die laughing just hearing his voice. Un, no. Howie spells rhubarb, and the only person who laughed was Julie Chen. Chenbot loves her built-in applause and laughter functions.
After that interview, we learned that we would get some information about the girl from Minnesota and the person who emigrated to the Unted States from Iraq. At first, I was like “What, Eric is from Iraq?” because usually the segments are on the nominees and not the people who nominated them. Quite obviously, Kaysar was from Iraq, which meant Janelle is from Minnesota. It’s really great to see these familty insights, because usually they are forced to rationalize their relative’s asinine behavior in front of the cameras. This time though, it was very nice, with both families basically agreeing that their loved one was intelligent, and they weren’t surprised at all that Janelle an Kaysar had teamed up. This segment gave us two “Captain Obvious” moments. First, it is obvious that Janelle’s Mom is younger than April (and Janelle is not bad looking with brown hair, I might add). Second, Kaysar’s sister, Dalia (who had a very sweet young boy wearing a darling Kaysar shirt, almost as cute as that baby picture of Kaysar we saw a few moments later) said that all the girls in the house wearing bikinis are not really the type of women Kaysar would normally meet in their culture. We love you Dalia, but when you came on in your hijab, we kind of figured that out pretty quickly.
The last segment before the big reveal was some clips of the houseguests putting together the biggest secret so far in the game – the fact that everybody had partners. We remember when Eric kind of flew off of the handle after his nomination and called out Sarah and James. Well, after that, everybody got together and started talking about the pairs. It has been quite apparent, and Eric and Maggie asked if they confessed would everybody else confess. Everybody agreed, but Ivette had a strange look on her face. No, she wasn’t surprised at how much her ass has expanded since the beginning of the show, she was apparently the only person in the house who didn’t have any inkling about the pairs. She said she needed some Xanax, and I agree, but think she should do us all a favor and take the whole bottle. Maybe after her stomach is pumped, her throat will be too raw to talk. Sucking Eric’s balls all summer surely hasn’t made her hoarse.
Everybody started admitting to things, but April and Jen and Ivette and Beau tried to keep the ruse alive that they didn’t know each other. We know that Julie is going to reveal that everybody has a partner, but they didn’t, so they were trying to pull off the lie for as long as possible. The problem is that the longer they deny it, the less effect it has when they admit it. James and Sarah tried to keep the charade, but realized they would gain more from being truthful, and they gained a big alliance. Jenny and April and Ivette and Beau are doing a decent job, but they really sound stupid as they are trying to convince the others of how they didn’t know each other.
Eventually, the pressure from the houseguests was too much, and the holdouts began admitting to having a relationship, but refused to admit how close they were. April and Jenny came up with saying that they had seen each other like three times before coming into the house, and Ivette said largely the same thing about her and Beau. She did say that there was another reason they put her and Beau together, and after Cappy put two and two together, he realized Ivette was gay. I guess she’s been doing a pretty good job keeping her little secret, but I still think it’s not long before April says something.
Finally, it’s time for the eviction. As always, both nominees had a chance for some final words. They both made it a point of thanking Big Brother (is that a contract obligation that they can’t say CBS or Viacom?) and thanking the houseguests, and Eric made a point of talking about his integrity. Anybody who has to brag about something all the time usually has a deficiency in that area. Howie he likes to talk about his sexual prowess; for Eric, it’s his integrity. Both probably aren’t 10% as great as they make themselves out to be.
The vote ended up being split down party lines, and Eric went home with a 5-4 vote. YES! His exit was fairly bitter. Although it was just a game, and he was cool with everybody all week, he didn’t look anybody in the eye unless they voted for him. He gave hugs all around, and told people not to cry in his ear and tell him it’s raining. Just kidding of course, but that would have been hilarious. There was no talk of karma boomerangs, and Eric left for his exit interview.
One of the things that always bothered me about Eric was that he always wore a stupid hat. Call me old fashioned, but I sort of like it when everybody gets dressed up for evictions, or at least puts on a skirt. Eric did neither, apparently unable to find any khakis in all of Las Vegas. And just as classy, he kept his backwards hat on for the interview. I thought Marvin looked stupid with the dog collar last year, but Eric may be just as dumb.
Eric gave an average interview. Julie asked him about going from first to worst, and he tried to put the blame on deals that were broken. Julie then surprised us by asking a relevant question, i.e. if Eric was one of the people breaking deals. Eric acknowledged that he broke a deal with James because of an allegiance to Maggie, but still blamed it all on Kaysar’s betrayal. Maybe they were right calling Eric the stupid one. If he didn’t get in a hissy fit about April’s fear that Michael might get too close and see all the scars from her plastic surgery and nominate Michael, Eric would not have been evicted this week. Kaysar never would have nominated him if he believed Eric was going to stay true to that original alliance. Remember that one? Eric was paranoid about the girls picking the guys off one by one. Was that a lie so he could get close to the women and betray the guys? Looks like it from here.
When he was done, Eric left us with one more thing to remember him by. After Maggie’s tearful goodbye to Eric, and Julie extended her hand to wish him luck/suck the life force from him, he said “Thank you JUUlieee”[click here for audio] and his voice cracked. Since you might not hear from me after Eric sends his goon squads to the TVgasm offices, I thought I would get one more dig in. I hope you enjoy.
That leaves us with the HOH competition, and we had a Big Brother staple, the bocce ball competition, or “Power Roller” as we heard it. Power Roller was basically bocce ball. The contestants had to roll a ball and get it as close as possible to the center of a target on the other end. There were several holes on the board, including one in the middle of the target. Rolling your ball in the hole meant a disqualification. Janelle went first, and although she was pretty far away from the center, it looked like she would win HOH. Everybody else was rolling it long or getting it in the hole. Julie gave us another great sound clip after April’s ball fell into the hole, giving a nice little “oohhhhhh”[click here for audio] , that I have played only around 1,000 times since making the clip.
I was so very excited for a Janelle household, because I think she would absolutely be brutal in her rule, especially towards April and Ivette, and they are my least favorite. But then something better happened – Maggie won. Oh man, if there was a nightmare scenario for the alliance of six, this was it. Now, it’s still up in the air how good Maggie is at scheming, because she seemed very naive in the first few weeks, but maybe that chess game opened her eyes. Maggie’s win is not the best for the people I want to see win (Janelle), but it really is the best for the viewer, probably almost as good as Kaysar. It’s going to be another great week.
Who is Maggie going to nominate? Will she let her emotions or brain rule her decisions? And finally, WHERE IS THE CHEN CAMEL TOE?! I’M DYING HERE.
TV Social
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59 Comments
As much as I enjoyed looking forward to Erprick’s eviction, this was really boring.
The interesting thing for me to see this week will be how firm James’ commitment is to the six.
How dumb is Ivette? She had no clue that everyone was in pairs. Is she the only one in the house that didn’t know. Typical of a person like that. The louder they yell, the less they know. Her voice tries to make up for her being a complete dumb @ss.
Really, how stupid is Ivette? Her partnership with Beau was one of the first that the rest picked up on and she was dumb enough to think that everyone actually believed her when she told them that she didn’t have a partner? She and Beau were also the only people who had no clue that the rest of the house was paired up. The rest of the house already knew and had everyone’s partners figured out a long time ago. What an idiot.
Rick D.
Those ChenPants were so ridiculous. This is what happens when you program ChenBot with fashion sense.
I could not believe Maggie won HOH after Janelle trumped everyone before her in the HOH game; I was convinced someone pooped in my ear and told me it was Christmas.
The Dictator, Janelle and Howie are gonna have to fight hard to keep the Circle of 6 Alliance together. It’s evident they’re going to lose one member but who is the question.
I see Rachel already moving to the Swing Out Sisters crew (yes that group include girlfriend Beau). And Maggie, if she’s smart will move on James immediately. This guy really has no backbone and from what’s been shown so far Sarah has been the one keeping him in the game and forcing him to make the right decisions. If she hadn’t forced James to reveal their relationship to The Dictator, his ass would have been out instead of Eric. Sarah is safely in the Circle of 6 but James won’t value their relationship enough to stay.
Someone is going to flip the game again this week and my money is on James or Rachel.
What?! No copmmentary on the “big reveal” and how CBS’s asinine decision to make it virtually guarnatees that NO couple will make it to the end? Let’s get real, peeps; if you knew the opposition had a chance at a bigger prize than you do, don’t you worry less about any other criteria and more about eliminating one member of each of the remining pairs ASAP?
Ivette may be one of the biggest idiots in the history of reality tv, if not the world! In addition to being so dumb that she had no clue that everyone had a partner, and on top of actually thinking that her fake crying about not having a partner had fooled anyone, she is actually stupid and unaware enough to whine and lecture about how immoral and dishonest Kaysar is while all the while she was trying to pull off an unnecessary and unstrategic lie about not having a partner like everyone else. So, under her own “logic,” she is immoral and dishonest for lying in the game, but she’s also stupid and terrible at it. What a loser.
The way I foresee it is, Maggie will put up two people from the “the Kaysar power of six” group. Even if one of those guys wins the Power of Veto to save themselves, Maggie will replace them with one of their own. If my calculations are right and the house is really divided, the votes will be four and four. A tie. Which means the HOH gets to decide. Sad as I am about it, I say “the six” are doomed.
I think it’s interesting to note that when Maggie won HOH, the people that ran up and hugged her were the same people that f’ing tried to voter her p*ssy out of that house. If I were Maggie, I would have said, “Don’t rape me and tell me I’m Suzanne Somers”.
Even though I wanted Janelle to win, I think it’s much more interesting that Maggie got it. It’s fun to see everyone scramble. The only annoying thing is we have to deal with Yvette for two more weeks.
Ok, not only is Ivette dumb, but WTF was she WEARING in the HOH competition last night? A polo shirt, daisy dukes and 6 inch high SILVER LAME stilettos! And BEAU said she has the best fashion sense??? Gay-Beau needs to OPEN his eyes cuz even Janelle in her black turtleneck and Ugg boots in the middle of summer in California has more fashion sense than IVETTE!
Is it just me or is Yvette extremely annoying? Does she know how badly she is coming across? Do you think she’ll be embarrassed when she gets out and see how much of a crotch she was?
I loved how when Chenbot revealed the “secret” about the pairs, the camera was on Maggie, Ivette, and Beau, in turn. Maggie’s face reacted like, “oh shit, I have absolutely no chance of winning either thing b/c my dude just left”….I wonder what that’ll do for her strategy. Then they showed Beau and Ivette high-fiving each other. Like those two are gonna make it to the very end? HA! Yeah right!
I love the shakeup of Maggie being HOH. It’s gonna be a sweet week of BB6!
Did anyone else notice that when Eric met with Julie, she was about three inches taller than he was?
Just saying…
Ha, Pooch! I’ve seen clits that were bigger than Eric.
Since we’re throwing out questions.. Did anyone else notice that Kaysar was beaming when he spoke to Julie about Janelle last night?
Humm, I see a crush brewing.
Oh my God, the Chenbot’s “Ohhhh” had me in tears. One of the funniest clips EVER.
I love the editors this season. When Ivette was revealing her big lesbian secret to they showed her in the Diary Room saying “I’m Gay!” The captioning read:
Ivette
She’s Gay.
I can’t believe how addicted I am to this show.
I thought it was odd that BB did that whole thing with Kaysar and Janelle’s families, asking them what they think about them teaming up in the house. Come on, what are they going to say, “I think my daughter/brother should have just let her/himself get voted out and shouldn’t have tried to strategize with anyone.”? Of course the families were going to say that even though they come from different backgrounds, K and J needed to team up, it was smart of them, and there’s nothing wrong with building a friendship with someone new. What was the point of that segment? Why not show more footage of what went on in the house that matters to the game or that is just plain funny instead of wasting time with filler?
My initial thought is that James and Sarah will have to be split up. Friends can always backstab each other, but those two are a different story ‘cuz they are luh-verrrrs.
I could see Sarah go without much of a problem. Uh, unless she starts making out in the Gold Room with Janelle this week; or Jennifer; or Ivette. Kayser and Janelle just doesn’t do much for me — too much hair to figure out in the Nightvision shot.
Lew, I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE how you called James and Sarah “luh-verrrrrs”. It’s to much!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Keep it up!
For some reason last night, I became transfixed with the Chenbot’s obvious nosejob. It’s LaToya Jackson bad.
As much as I would’ve loved to have seen Janelle get HOH, I think it’s going to be a more interesting week with Maggie getting it instead.
My prediction is that Maggie will put up Kaysar and James, then if one of them get POV and take themselves off the block, she’ll put up Janelle.
If I were HOH, I’d put up James and Rachel, then if one of the won POV, I’d put in the partner of the one that stays on the block, either Sarah or Howie.
It’s going to be fun to watch this week!
Bobbie, I think you may have a point. If you’re someone whose partners is already gone and you’re torn between the two nominees, the deciding factor could very well be a desire to break up a pair (if one nominee still has a partner while the other doesn’t.) Also, the partners clearly give additional support and power to each person still in a partnership, so breaking them up will have to be a goal of the other competitors. Of course, an in-the-house pair like Kaysar and Janelle can’t play for the bigger money, but they are still a strong pair the others should be looking to break up for strategy reasons.
OMG, I could not believe the “I Dream of Jeanie” pants that Chenbot was wearing! WTF! I work in midtown Manhattan, where you literally see the entire chic to shabby spectrum, and I’ve NEVER seen this look. And quite frankly, it scared me.
So I was watching Made yesterday and Beau was on it, attempting to give his ‘insight’ to some punk girl who wanted to become homecoming queen. The man has no fashion sense whatsoever and it was clear to me when I saw him wearing those bright orange pants with the green t-shirt. He looked like a retarded bottle of Mello Yellow. No wonder he is friends with Ivette.
Wha? No pointing out the name on the back of Eric’s shirt? Littmann. What an appropriate last name. At first I thought it said “Little Man.” Ba!
Glad to see that April’s geriatric slams are back. They’ve been in short supply lately.
Thanks, too, for pointing out the Chenbot’s sports-cuffed pantsuit. Perhaps it keeps the servo-lubes contained.
Jess (#12),
I completely agree with regards to the Ivette/Beau high five. These people are so clueless. They fought tooth and nail to keep the other HGs from knowing about their secret partnership, but 2.5 seconds after hearing about the big payoff, and suddenly it’s “Woohoo!!!” On national TV, no less. They have no chance.
And I’m still laughing at: “I was convinced someone pooped in my ear and told me it was Christmas.”
ha!
I love reading these recaps but have a problem. Since I read them at work and can’t leave this site opened and on my screen, I print the recaps out. But, over the past few weeks, whenever I try to print, something is wrong and the site just closes and won’t print. Is anyone else having this problem?? PLEASE fix this!! PLEASE!
Okay, everyone really needs to stop picking on Eric for saying “Don’t piss in my ear and tell me it’s raining.” By my rough calculations his ear is about the same height as an average person’s leg. C’mon people, it’s not nice to make fun of midgets. Shame on you all.
I can’t believe you didn’t mention everyone’s reaction to the million dollar “secret”. Ivette and Beau’s screaming shattering near by windows.
Everyone who lost a partner already (Kaysar, Janelle, Maggie) looked like their puppies were just shot in front of them. THAT was priceless. I’d love to see some screen caps of their faces.
Re: Julie’s million dollar secret reveal.
It was so uneventful, I didn’t even put it in. I did like how the houseguests were so in shock after Maggie won that they weren’t talking and the producers just cued up some generic outro music for the last five minutes.
wait, eric’s shirt didn’t say “littleman”?
it’s like someone jizzed on my ear and told me it’s hair gel.
Oh my god .. where to begin?! Some of the above posts have me lmao .. they are sure to be classics.
As for Erprick (loved that!) the midget .. glad he’s gone. Now maybe he can enroll in anger management classes.
As for Ivette .. someone get that idiot a dictionary .. compairing the reveal of secrets to a tsunami was flippin ridiculous. No one died as a result of this news.
Glad to find out that the Amber Alert has safely returned Jen & Beau to the house, but if there was still someone in the house who didn’t know that Beau & Ivette knew eachother, his answer that she was the best dressed in the house should have been the final puzzle piece connecting them. She looks like a poster girl for what not to wear. Ever. That girl is just tore up from the floor up.
And what the hell is up with Maggie and that green ribbon she is determined to wear in her hair every day?! It’s horrible.
And the ‘home’ interviews … did anyone else notice that Janelle’s mom looked younger then her?! Definately younger than April, but she reminds me of that movie “Death Becomes Her” .. where they never quite die … mmmmmmmmm
Anyway, looking forward to the installment to see where the blood shed leads ……………
Hey JTV460-
I got the same problem, but have no clue how to get around that. Cannot print the recap and trying closes the internet window on me. Anyone else out there know how to get around this problem?
Loved the recap J-Unit!
Did anyone else catch Kaysar’s prediction to Jannelle that the ‘big suprise’ was that they stuck two people in a house full of idiot’s!! You’d think he has an internet connection to tvgasm.com with that observation.
Did anyone catch the morning show clip this morning that Chenbot was plugging? Whas it a mentionable piece?
If you are having printing problems, please e-mail me directly and not in the comments section.
I will need to know the following information:
OS version, Browser and browser version.
Who on earth picked out the Chenbot’s pants?
I think I saw someone wearing those pants in the movie Breakin’ back in the 80′s.
Can’t wait to see James squirm this week! He’s such a douchebag. This week’s gonna be too fun to watch!!!
The great thing about that “oohhhhh” is that it has someone panting right after it and the whole thing is set to a boom-chickah-wah-wah porno beat. It sounds like Elmer Fudd getting his wocks off.
the ‘secret clip’ on the early show was just sarah crying to kaysar about how sad it is that she has no one to support her in the house like her family. which seems like either idiocy or blatant strategy, since her fucking BOYFRIEND is in the house, which actually also makes it idiotic strategy if it was intentional. so idiotic, in fact, that even the Chenbot noticed it.
also, to the best of my knowledge, Marvin coined the “don’t pee on my leg and tell me it’s raining” last season, not karen. which pissed me off even more: er-dick awkwardly and poorly quoting one of BB’s most legendary competitors ever. er-dick isn’t fit to piss on marvin’s leg.
whatever! don’t secrete pus onto my forearm and tell me it’s suntan lotion.
(sorry, with all the great riffs already, i’m reaching.)
finally, i’ll put my controversial suggestion out there: kaysar should attempt to team with maggie in a supersecret two-person alliance to take them all the way. it will never happen, but oh what fun.
reality tv girl…. it was Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo!
I missed the show last night cuz I was at the Dukes of Hazzard premiere (the after-party was great as I name drop, well, not a name, but, whatever, shut up, stop bothering me, crap, here i go talking to myself), but am a bit conflicted now because while I have the epsiode on TiVo and could watch it, this is the first time I read your recap first and now I think I like the recap better. Well, I’ll still have to watch and try to find the camel toe, or to see if James and his lisp ever come out of the closet, or if Beau can be more Beau-ring!
I have to know if I’m the only one that caught this… there was a moment where Crappy & Maggie were talking. Crappy told Maggie that she needed to be prepared for him to leave. Her barely intelligible response… “As do you I.”
Geez….Surely they couldn’t have thought the group of 6 was going to remain the group of six. A group of five it will be…
Prediction is if Maggie is smart (and not influenced by Ivette=Idiot) up for eviction will be James and Sarah…If one of them gets vetoed then expect Howie to be put up. With the (soooo anticlimactic Million Dollar Reveal) they’d be fools to let any pairs stay in the house from the other side. Not only does it get them closer to the million but also keeps them as a power block of two.
Did love the look on Maggie’s face when she clicked into the fact that she had no chance of winning the million.
God help us if they bring back an evicted person (persons)
And Chen’s trousers were transfixing in their sheer harem awfulness.
James = scruffy adult Jimmy Neutron.
My TiVo did not record this episode.
I don’t know why.
I kind of want to throw things and cry.
Someone please tell me where I can download this episode as soon as humanly possible or I might be forced to set my hair on fire.
I really don’t think that Maggie is smart enough to realize she had better break up one of the power couple$. I’d bet that she is gonna nominate Kaysar and Jannelle. If one of them gets POV, then I would expect James to on the block. But hey, maybe she isn’t as dumb as Ivette.
Can we all ponder for a minute the titles we would place under each guests name throughout the show if we were editing.
Ivette
She’s an iddiot.
Crappy
He’s a dickwad!
Howie
Not Funny.
These recaps are hilarious! And your whole take on Eric’s “don’t pee in my ear” comment had me laughing out loud. It will be interesting to me to see how shameless “the six” will get as far as kissing Maggie’s ass. Is it just me, or is she in love with the “little man”?
so before i can even comment on the episode, some of you posters have had me laughing all morning. “someone pooped in my ear and told me it’s christmas”—priceless
“don’t rape me and tell me i’m suzanne summers”…seriously, loved that stuff!
as for the episode, i was sad to see maggie get HOH, but now we can see if she’s really smart and will play the game well. hopefully kaysar and janelle stay. i’d actually love to see old lady april go, but that’s just me. in a perfect world, ivette, but that won’t be happening
Maggie should start to break up pairs, if she and Crappy can’t have the cash why should anyone else.
I think Yvette has downs syndrome. I often wonder if CBS gets government kickbacks for hiring the mentally challenged?
Chebots linen pants were so wrinkled in the crotch area. Bad move for a alleged TV “news”woman. I guess Les Moonves likes it all wrinkly…; ) Her outfit was cringeworthy, white is never a good choice. I’m surprised that tired queen ‘Bore’ (as opposed to Beau) didn’t have somethin’ to say about that, sista!
oh and the chenbot tapered pants circa 1983…wtf?!??!
For those who can’t print from the site: try copying and pasting into Word. That’s how I do it and works fine every time.
And you all had me laughing at your great comments!
Did ya all catch how Ivette was going on and on how much she liked Eric..
maybe BB6 is turning her back into a hetrosexual… then again it is the summer of secrets
Did anyone catch Beau’s appearance on MTV’s Made “I Want to be Prom Queen” ??
He played a surprising a role.. the most boring gay personal shopper for the wanna be prom queen ever. Quite a stretch for him. I happened to catch the episode this week and thought “When did he get evicted from the BB house?”
Unless you want to look like 3 different flavors of sherbet, I’m not sure who would pay Beau to dress them. Well, there is Ivette – maybe that’s how they met. Any lawyers watch “The Law Firm”? Just asking. Only interesting if you’re a lawyer.
I loved (Kellied) how during the Chen-bot interview how Cappy said how being so honorable got him this far in the game. You got booted out 3rd! Out of 14 you midget. That sucks!
well, i have to admit that when maggie won the HOH competition, i felt a little like a Bo-Sox fan watching bill buckner blow game 6 of the ’86 series. at least we were spared the sight of cap’n midgey-’roid’s celebration roars and fist-pumps, or the sight of the incredible expanding latina lesbian leaping into his arms–though this time she might have knocked him over. if ivette lasts much longer in the house she will have to start borrowing howie’s sweatpants to cover up that gi-normous booty.
but hey–give maggie the credit. she earned her moment in the sun, and while it may mean curtains for the infinitely more likable kaysar or janelle, it may also be a blessing in disguise, as kaysar seemed a little too comfortable in his new alliance of 6. james is absolutely ruthless, and will never honor an alliance if he sees a better angle or simply needs to save his own ass. remember, before james ended up on the block, he was firmly behind the plan to oust janelle and kaysar ASAP. maggie seems like the type to put payback before strategy, but james made a lot of people angry by flipping on eric’s alliance. of course, james had no alternative, since eric was already selling him down the river to save maggie, but in cappy-logic, there’s no ‘integrity’ in self-preservation.
can’t wait to watch james scramble this week. i predict that he has already tried to get back on the good side of maggie and eric’s minions, blamed his defection on kaysar’s manipupation, and is offering to be maggie’s new BFFL. he may well even offer to sacrifice sarah, who seems well on her way to a future as a battered wife.
MY PREDICTIONS:
NOMINEES: KAYSAR/JANELLE
VETO PLAYERS:KAYSAR/JAMES
MAGGIE/IVETTE
JANELLE/HOWIE
WINNER:JAMES
VETO USED ON KAYSAR
HOWIE NOMINATED
JANELLE EVICTED
It’s obvious that kaysar or janelle will go home.
I can’t believe you missed:
Ivette pretends to cry about not having a partner. cut to Beau in the confessional “bwahhhhhh” (I want a screencap of that)
Ivette’s caption in the confessional after denying being gay. Under her name it said “she’s gay” Both made me lol and deserved a screencap
btw, Quick Quote (#35),
Noticed that too. That was funny.
I’m surprised no one has mentioned the obvious – April is really Jennifer’s mother.
Anyone else wonder how Eric’s wife felt about Maggie’s confessions of love and adoration for her Eric? Of course, we can assume that Maggie and Cappy never consummated their relationship because that would violate his personal sense of integrity. However, after seeing how his integrity can change in a matter of days, anythng is possible. If I was a Vegas divorce lawyer, though, I would be making a call.
timbob3461, that is a greatpoint. She could very be.
btw, when I said that was funny (in post #57), I meant Kaysar and Janelle, not the morning show clip.