This season of Big Brother has really been difficult for all but the most hard core of fans; there is even speculation that CBS will end the season earlier than expected because ratings have not been what they expected. I still think that Big Brother All Stars was a great idea. Where CBS went wrong was putting so many people in from seasons five and six, and having so many people from Los Angeles. They were great seasons with lots of drama, but what we were looking for is people to form new alliances. I love LA, but there is just too much conflict of interest and while secret partners may have worked last year, the producers knew all about them.
That being said, I still love this season, and if you have given up watching because of some reason or another, remember that you’ll always have the TVgasm recaps to keep you entertained, and the TVgasm Forums to feed your discussion every day. Last night was going to be a big test for Chilltown and Legion of Doom. How do you keep Erika AND Danielle in the game without bringing too much attention to yourself? Let’s find out.Nobody was really surprised at the nominations. Some people have complained that I have turned on Janey this season or that I need to calm down with my commentary. Calm down? This is TVgasm! I practically pee myself with joy at the sight of Julie Chen every Thursday night. Obviously I am a little too into this show for my own good, but I have at least weaned myself off of the live feeds. Speaking of which, you can now get the last month or so of the live feeds for $14.99. Just give up US Weekly for a month and you’re golden!
Like I said, I have been hard on Janelle, but I have to call it like I see it. The truth is that I am going to call every single nomination stupid unless their goal is to get rid of Chilltown. Therefore, I have to dislike Janelle’s nominations. I can forgive her for going after Danielle, because Danielle did go on the attack, but so much of Janey’s other reasoning is just plain stupid. I am not going to fall for her excuses about “scumbag” players like Erika (Janelle’s words, not mine) while she apparently has no problem confiding in Dr. Will.
I love the way Dr. Will is playing the game, because he seems to be playing with everybody’s minds just for his own amusement, but if Janelle is getting mad at people like Erika for “floating behind season six and letting us do their dirty work”, shouldn’t she be mad first at Dr. Will? Sure Will and Boogie offer their “protection”, but so far they only have one fixed Veto competition win to show for all of their efforts. About the only thing Boogie and Will can offer somebody is the chance not to be whitest person in the room.
If there is anything that I can enjoy about Janelle’s nominations is that it seems to have inspired a lot of people to come out from hiding, particularly Erika. I am never one for whiny people who cry a lot, and that is just about the only thing you get from Erika for most of the season. She’s been so depressed and sickly looking that I haven’t even been able to enjoy looking at her boobs. THAT, my friends, is a real tragedy. And although it was Erika and Danielle on the block, Marcellas realized that the talk Janelle gave about people who hang out in her HoH room that would stab her in the back when they get the chance was directed at him. That makes TWO drama queens in the house and that is better for everybody.
However, the real drama in the house is the revelation of the Mike Boogie and Erika romance. What can I say? Seeing them kiss was worse than seeing a hot girl in he bikini bottoms at the beach, checking out her ass, and realizing there’s a fruit bowl. There is not enough cinnamon gum in the world to get that taste out of your mouth, just ask Ace Ventura. For the record, their relationship might kill the thought of All Star reality competitions for years to come. I cannot believe that the producers were so duped by this, but it’s even worse to think that the producers knew about this and still let Mike Boogie into the house (he was a producer’s choice).
If the though of Erika kissing Mike Boogie makes you feel sick, imagine what it must be like for her
Usually, I can find something at least mildly romantic or cute about relationships among reality contestants, even the ones that end in a train wreck. I can’t say the same thing about Erika and Mike. I love Erika as a person, but flying into the arms of Mike Boogie after she has been with Josh makes her look desperate. Now granted, Boogie actually has businesses and his post-reality career prospects are much better than Josh’s, but we’ll forever wonder about what she saw in Boogie. If you believe in any type of God or higher power on this earth, please pray that Julie asks Erika how she liked being sloppy seconds to a wooden box. Julie, if you ask this question if and when Erika is evicted, I promise to baby sit any time you ask.
Basically, there is nothing about this relationship that can make us feel good for either of them, and if CBS decides to film this wedding like Rob and Amber, there aren’t enough gray-filtered procedural dramas in their lineup to pull the network out of the hole they’ll be digging for themselves. I wouldn’t watch that shit in a million years, unless, of course, Julie Chen showed up and presented the newlyweds with a brand new set of shiny Chenbot mugs at the reception.
Although Danielle and Erika were on the block, the two of them had some sort of protection. The person who was really worried about his status in the game was Marcellas, who has no strong allies since he and Janelle had their breakup. Therefore, Marcellas goes up to the HoH room to explain his situation and kiss a little ass. The two of them have not spoken for what seems like a month, but Marcellas goes up there and says “I am working under the assumption that we still had a deal until the final two”. This then leads into the eventual “I thought YOU were talking shit about ME” conversation, but Marcellas is able to put a little doubt into Janelle’s mind by reminding her what her source for all of that information was (Chilltown).
In the end, it looks like Marcellas might have saved himself because he says that he only has one deal and that’s with Janelle. Now that statement is technically true, Marcellas hasn’t made a deal with anybody else, but it’s also not worth the pink bathrobe it’s written on. Marcellas tells Janelle that they should “pretend” to hate each other, which makes it so easy because he is not pretending, but Marcellas intends to take Janelle down the first chance get gets.
I really liked the idea of the coup d’etat, but the producers have managed to make it ambiguous, complicated, and therefore uninteresting. We don’t need to know the answer, but we should at least have some clue as to what the power is going to be. Julie told us that if a person wins the power, they would have a chance to shake up the house and change the nominations, but what is going to happen? Can they nominate the HoH? Can they nominate the Veto winner? Can they nominate Kaysar (come on, you know it would be just as funny to see him eliminated a FOURTH time)? When does all of this happen?
The houseguests are still interested, and four people have already made their guesses after just one clue, which was the female sheep with the pink bow. A second clue appeared, and it was a huge needle and spool of thread. Since we are thinking of a phrase that relates to the game, my guess is going to be “Seeing Erika and Boogie kiss makes me want to sew my eyes shut and fall asleep by counting sheep”. Slightly complicated, but surely no worse than “You are expected to expect the unexpected”.
With the second clue, people started to have better guesses, but again, it is so cryptic, a lot of things would work. Boogie and Will started thinking that it could be “A Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing”, which is what a lot of people guessed after the first clue, but if you take the ewe, i.e. “you” and the needle and thread, which can be sew, or “sow”, “You reap what you sow” is a pretty good guess. Boogie and Will seemed to think about that a little bit, but neither had the confidence to ring the bell and make an actual guess.
One person who did have that confidence was Big Boy Howie. He was talking with Janelle, and they think it might be a wolf in sheep’s clothing as well, but Janelle is smart enough to realize that if the two of them wait for the last clue, it might be too late. Howie wants to wait just in case there is “a wolf or some clothing” as the next clue, and then they’ll know for sure. Yeah Howie, they’re going to put a pair of khakis on a wolf and then you’ll know for sure. I’m waiting for a picture of Erika to prove “You reap what you sow”. She is looking grim this year, which can mean grim reaper. Ewe Reaper Sew. Sounds good toe me.
Anyway, Janelle convinced Howie to make a guess. If he was right, great, if not, they have somebody around to make a guess at the third clue. Howie rings the bell and makes his guess, but Janelle realizes that she has to make sure Howie doesn’t tell other people what they guessed. This is something I really didn’t understand. If you made a guess, why tell other people? It only narrows the number of possibilities that could be the right answer. The better idea is to lie about what you said. If I were Danielle, I would say I guessed “wolf in sheep’s clothing” because it has two affects. One, anybody else who thought of it would think it was already used and they needed to say something else. Two, if somebody happens to guess “Do Not Assume”, they will already be too late because Danielle already guessed it.
Janelle was smart enough to realize you don’t want to tell anybody, but unfortunately, she only had Howie to play the game with her, and she couldn’t think of a very good fake phrase for Howie to use. I am not sure if she never heard “You reap what you sew”, but that would have been perfect. Howie guessed “Wolf in sheep’s clothing” so if other people guessed it the next time, they would be too late. If they thought it was “you reap what you sew” they would think that Howie already said it. Instead, Janelle could only come up with “Spool of lies”. Howie made a good effort to tell everybody he said “spool of lies”, but the only spool of lies that people could think of were coming from Howie’s mouth.
Finally, it was time for the Veto competition. Janelle revealed that she could not compete for the win, which was a huge blow considering the rest of the Legion of Doom decided that they would fix it for Danielle. The three people picked to play with Danielle and Erika were Will, James, and Marcellas.
When they got outside, we saw a bunch of challenges from previous seasons, including the Pink Flamingos, the Spinning Chair, and the Mechanical Bull. We even got a guest announcer, but it was only Nicole from Big Brother 2. Even though will is scared of her, she is not very interesting, and we just had her for the food competition, so I think she was a horrible choice. There were four challenges that would take place. First, a former Big Brother houseguest would attempt the challenge, and the veto competitors would make guesses on whether they could beat their time or not. Whoever had the biggest time differential would get a chance to prove it. If they succeeded, they would eliminate one person, if they failed, they would be eliminated. Sounds complicated and stupid, but it was kind of fun, if for nothing more than the old faces we got to see.
The first to trot out was April from last year. Nobody really liked April, but she did have big boobs, and Howie was really happy to see her, even if he did spend half of the summer threatening her dog and trying to make her life miserable. April was timed eating 15 pieces of sushi. That’s like two and a half California rolls, which is NOTHING. April took almost four minutes to do it, but I think I could have finished in half the time. Or maybe I’ll get madeyoulaugh to try it. I don’t think he likes sushi, but it is better than a plateful of wasabi.
Will said that he could finish the sushi in 2:56, and since he guessed the lowest number, he got to try. He finished easily, and after he won, he chose to eliminate Marcellas. Marcellas is rarely picked to play in competitions and is almost always eliminated early, so he was very upset, calling Will and Boogie “gayer that I am”, which is funny because you kind of feel like it’s true.
Our next blast from the past was Scott from Big Brother 5. He used to be best friends with Jase, but now? Not so much. Scott came in, without any skidmarks this time, and played the flamingo toss. The goal was to try and get ten points as quickly as possible by throwing a hula hoop around a flamingo. The farther away the flamingo, the more points you would receive. James won the right to challenge Scott, and he won, eliminating not Danielle, but Erika.
After James eliminated Erika, Janelle started to get a bad feeling about everything. She thought that James was in their alliance for good after Danielle nominated him, but if he didn’t have a deal with her, why did he eliminate Erika. To tell you the truth, the better question would be why didn’t he eliminate Dr. Will? Janelle believes that Erika and Danielle have an alliance, so if Danielle was working with James, why remove somebody from that alliance? These are the types of things that drive us crazy about watching these people in the house right now.
The next challenge featured Jack from season 4. Jack is the ex-FBI agent who said Dana had all the appeal of a Buzzard’s crotch. He also had one of the funniest moments of the season when he tried to get out of the spinning chair for a challenge and landed right on his face. Erika was a master of the challenge, but being eliminated, she couldn’t participate. Jack did a lot better this time getting out of the chair and placing the champagne glass on the platform in less than 40 seconds, and once again James had the chance to beat his time. With all eyes on him, James tried to act like he was really dizzy and couldn’t get it done, but he did a really bad acting job. He failed, and was eliminated, but Janelle finally had proof that something was wrong.
The last challenge was the mechanical bull ride, and they brought back Hardy from season 2. Apparently Hardy was really hot during his season and great eye candy for all of the viewers. I would like to say something else about him, but he didn’t say anything. Hardy rode the bull for almost a minute and Will got the chance to beat his score by saying he could last three minutes. Since you have to beat the score that you guessed, Will basically gave himself and impossible task. He failed and was eliminated, giving Danielle the Power of Veto.
Janelle and Howie were pissed, and Howie even called James’ actions “The Ultimate Betrayal”. I know that we have wanted season six to be a tight group, but I think a lot of people saw this coming. James knew that he was never going to be a close part of the group with Janelle, Howie, and Kaysar, and to be honest, he has been looking for a way to get back at them for nominating him and Sarah since last year. He didn’t get a chance to nominate them himself, but ruining their plans is about as good as it gets.
That being said, James does need Howie and Janelle as a backup plan, so he needed to try and explain what he did. The sad part of this is that Janelle and Howie need James, so while they are pissed with him, they still need him. About the only way things could get worse for Janelle is if Erika didn’t leave the house, so she suggests that they nominate Chilltown to ensure that Erika leaves. It was the first intelligent thing she had said in a week, but would Chilltown really let that happen? Of course not, and the way Will got himself out of this ext situation was genius.
After James reports to them how shit hit the fan, Will and Boogie head up to the HoH. Stupid James let them go alone. While there, Will tries to make the case to put up Marcellas, and when Janelle starts to get frustrated about the veto competition, Will tells her that she shouldn’t be mad at Chilltown for her plan getting fucked up, but should be getting mad at James.
Will’s greatness is that he does such a good job of making people think that they need him to do anything. If anything goes wrong, he has a backup plan. Everybody talks about James and Danielle, but nobody mentions anything about Chilltown working with them, so Will can lie all he wants about James and it won’t affect him. If Janelle puts up James instead of Marcellas, Will and Boogie shift to Janelle and Howie instead. He’s covered either way.
The next segment involved Will, Erika, Janelle, and Mike Boogie frolicking in the shower. People might have been interested in seeing Will and Janelle, and if Erika joined, maybe that’s exciting, but putting Boogie in there really kills the moment, sort of like making out while listening to Barry White and the Insane Clown Posse comes on the next song. Will and Boogie said that it was all a part of their plan to steal these girls hearts before they rip them out, but the only person interested in this whole thing was Howie, who could only listen from the outside while he heard all of the frolicking in the shower. Oh well, there’s always the jack shack.
They show more skin on the Disney channel
Later, Janelle called Marcellas in to talk with her. She was going to go along with the idea of putting up Marcellas, but she “guaranteed” that Marcellas is safe. I am not sure what Janelle is thinking. Is she thinking of putting her trust in James again? Danielle? Chicken George? Chilltown? Marcellas knew that he would be gone if he was put up, because I think he knows what is going on in the house with James and Danielle and Chilltown, but he hates Janelle too much to tell her the truth. Right now it is in Marcellas’ best interest to rat out Danielle, James, and Chilltown, because his only play is with Janelle.
The problem, of course, is that Janelle probably wouldn’t listen to him. She can say whatever she wants to say about the game, but Will has her in his back pocket. Right before the veto ceremony, Will makes one more push for Marcellas, saying that he likes honesty, as if that means anything, and telling Janelle that he and Mike have her back. You know, things have been unraveling for Janelle and her allies since the beginning of the game. You would think that after six weeks of targeting floaters, she might realize that some of her advice is bad. The only common denominator in all of the ways this summer has been fucked up for Season Six is that Chilltown has been involved, but I think Janelle is in so deep, there is no way to pull herself out at this point in the game.
Veto ceremonies are never that interesting, but the most boring are when they somebody on the block has the veto power and the producers try and pretend like that person won’t use it on themselves. Ever since that happened to Marcellas and he was voted out, there is no way it is ever going to happen again.
At the ceremony, Danielle uses the veto, and Janelle puts up Marcellas, who does his best martyr impersonation. He pretends that he is not upset, but says that he wants to rip Janelle’s heart out and feed it to Chilltown. He’s bitter, but if he knew what Chilltown was up to, he should have told Janelle. I’ve been disappointed by Janelle, but I don’t want her to go out like this. The saddest part about all of this is that Janelle really thinks she has a chance to take out Erika, saying that if Erika stays home, she’s in trouble, because that means the people she trusts are trying to get her. Jedi Janey is at her best when she is under pressure, so we’ll get to see what she is made of in the coming weeks.
I thought that this was a pretty good episode. I have gone from being depressed about the producer conspiracies to simply being depressed at how Janelle is being duped in every decision that she makes. My hat’s off to Chilltown for orchestrating this, but it really takes my enjoyment out of the show when my two favorite players, Janelle and Danielle, are counting on Chilltown’s help to win it all. My only hope is that Chilltown is exposed and the rest of the house gets a clue and goes after them. I’m afraid my dream was made to be crushed.
What did you think of this episode? What do you think of the Boogie and Erika romance? Did Janelle make the right choice to put up Marcellas? Will Marcellas or Erika go home? Is there any hope of stopping Chilltown?