Say Goodbye To Your Front Butt And Man Cans

Monday marked the super sized debut of The Biggest Loser on the National Broadcast Network. In which a ton of people compete for a $250,000 prize. When I say ton of people, I mean a ton of people. The combined weight of the competitors is over 3,000lbs. I haven’t seen this many breasts on men since…well just about any time I drive through West Hollywood. Ok, bad example.

The Premise of the show is to lose the most weight but not through “sucking and tucking” (which is only 1 letter off from one of my favorite movie titles) but through some new fad called “diet and exercise”?? Ummm..I know, I’m with you on this. Diet and exercise just sounds ugly. Why on earth would I want to do that? I can’t help but feel bad for these chunky monkeys as I sat there watching this show with my thin crust (low carb) pizza and wearing my Ab Tronic abdomen shocking belt, (its like doing 1000 sit-ups while I just sit there!!) The hostess of the show is, appropriately, the bulge battling Caroline Rhea. Or as I like to refer to her, “the only D list celeb other than Craig T. Nelson or Geraldo to come out of my alma mater U of A.” Initially, I thought that Caroline Rhea was a wonderful idea to host since she herself has public ally struggled with squeezing into her thin pants. I thought it was sensitive of the directors to have it hosted by a fun, full figured woman and not dangle some ridiculously fit high energy douche-bag in front of the chubby cheeked faces of the obese contestants. Moments later we meet Jillian, the high energy, ridiculously fit douche-bag of the show. She leads 1/2 of the competitors through a rigorous diet and exercise regimen which looks so not fun. Her method, “The Eat Less Diet” HOLY INNOVATIVE BATMAN!! What think tank came up with that one? Basically, she makes her team eat fewer calories than they burn through out the day. I’m cool with that as long as my Ab Shocker can burn at least a couple beers some pizza and wings worth of calories, plus 2 more. Her other method, wear no clothes to make the fatty’s feel even worse about themselves, and then when they can’t feel any worse yell at them and remind them they will “cry and puke today.”

I have a certain distain for most self proclaimed exercise gurus or “__fill in the blank__” to the stars, or attractive people in general. Sadly for Jillian, she�s all three. (and by attractive I mean in the “looked like she was once a man” kinda way) I’m really not qualified to psycho-analyze…but I will anyways. People who are this nasty to others and then guise it as “I’m just giving tough love” I am convinced were molested as children by someone close to them, and uncle, a priest…pick a clich� any clich�. This broad, is just so nasty to people the only thing that can redeem her in my mind as anything less than Satan, is if she had some “uncle-daddy time” growing up.

By contrast, the blue team is lead by trainer Bob. Trainer Bob is more of a Zen-like guy. His dieting method, the “eat more” diet. I like the sound of that one. Smaller portions of 4 to 6 servings a day combined with a rigorous yet loving work out session. It is through this he hopes to get Maurice down to his Rubin Studdard weight.

I guess some of the Oprah watching never-fulls are upset with the show thinking it exploits the obese in this country and makes them objects of mockery. To those soon to be extreme make-over candidates, I say put some more food in that gab hole of yours and shut up. One of the phrases repeated on the show was “new lease on life.” During an interview with Extra last night, one of Oprah’s Orca’s was upset by that term stating “I am happy with my life, and don�t feel they are in a place to tell me I need a new lease on it just because I�m a little overweight.” First of all Krispy Kream, unless the camera now adds 112 lbs, you were a little more than a little overweight. Secondly, just because you are content with your ding-dong, ring-dings, and ho-ho’s some people may find their addiction to food a burden and do want to improve their health and fitness. At 440 lbs some of these people have no choice but to pray a show like this picks them to jump start their lives and motivate them to change their life.

This show not only does good by its contestants, but it also does good by its viewers. How exciting could it possibly be to watch some people diet? VERY!

The show has positive morals, and good lifestyles being portrayed. And with a weekly weigh-in in every episode, the time line for what they lived and how we see is more consistent than some other shows out there. We can track their successes and failures. But having lost just under 180lbs in the 1st week of the show, I feel the show is off to a great start to really change the lives of the contestants for the better.

I give this show the TVGasm stamp of approval. (which I believe we may be selling soon in our online sell-out….shop…our online shop)

In addition to being a nice show, it�s good to see where Wendy the Snapple Lady has gone, as well as the son of Rev Jim, from Taxi.