Celebrity Apprentice Recap: Busting Your Peanuts

Celebrity Apprentice

By Luscious | Wednesday, April 25, 2012 | 9:52 am | 66 Comments

Greeting Gasmii!

This week on Celebrity Apprentice, we lost yet another vital brain, which means we have more weak players left than strong ones.  I think it’s clear the contenders for the title will be Aubrey, Clay and Lisa, and I’m kind of bummed that this won’t turn out to be a battle of the geniuses, since Dee and (spoiler alert!) Penn have both been sent packing.

Our episode picks up with Unanimous speculating that Paul will be the one sent home. Lisa tells us that she will try to be nice to Dayana from now on.

This is Lisa’s nice face.

For some reason, when Aubrey and Teresa return from the boardroom, Aubrey does a little soft shoe.

What the hell is she doing and why do these two still look like puppets?

Arsenio says there is a bigger problem than the fact that he’s the odd man out because he has two women left on his team.

“One’s damn near genius, the other’s damn near not.”

Penn says he will miss pretty Pauly and Aubrey agrees and says he was so sweet.

Clay wants to vomit at Aubrey’s insincerity.

The next day, Lisa delivers her paltry winnings to the Gay Men’s Health Crisis. Over a horrific looking meal of canned veggies and greasy chicken, she delivers the check to a table full of mostly women.

 

Maybe Lisa’s heart belongs to this charity because
being a gay man with a health crisis is her destiny.

Trump has the teams gather in his “humble” apartment, a garish place lined with gold, frescoes, crystal and white furniture.

It reminds me of the wealthy sultans of the middle east and their
palaces of gold – it is far too outlandish and tacky to be comfortable.

Poor Barron – there’s no way he’s allowed to tear
around that place with a Big Wheel.

Aubrey tells us the apartment reeks of wealth. She compares it to Charlie and the Chocolate factory, but instead of chocolate, the walls are dripping with gold.

Who’s a girl gotta lay to get a piece of this?

The purpose of Trump showing off his place is to announce he’s launching a new fragrance called Success and the teams are going to create displays for the Macy’s kick-off.

Oh cut it out, Lisa. It’s not that big a deal.

The winning team will get twenty thousand for their charity, but if he really likes the final product, he’ll add another 100K to the pot.

Trump has rolled out an entire posse of the undead for this task.

What do you call a group of zombies? A gaggle, a pod, or maybe a zambo of zombies?

Not only do we have two pasty execs from the Trump org and Macy’s, but also we have Vamperic and (drum roll please) this week, George was exhumed to join the land of the living.

You woke me up to judge a freaking perfume?!!!

For those of you who don’t know George, he is as old as the hills and has been serving as an adviser on Celebrity Apprentice since the first season when he and some battle ax woman named Caroline (remember her?) terrorized innocent MBA grads with their shrewd, viscous and heartless scrutiny. I wonder where ruthless Caroline is now…

To distance himself from his eternal brethren, Donald has painted himself pink this week to match his tie.

I guess that is a Trump signature trademark,
since Vamperic was doing it last week.

The teams pick their project managers. Aubrey is ready and willing to lead Unanimous, while no one really wants to take it on Forte, but since either Penn or Clay are up and Penn is afraid to helm a perfume campaign, it falls to the gay guy to try to compete with the pink haired genius on this one. It will be a re-match of Clay vs. Aubrey; Aubrey hopes she will finally win and spank that crooning ho’s ass. Aubrey is looking particularly fabricated this week.

Name that cartoon character.

 

Also, WTF is that in Trump’s apartment?

Team Forte gather to discuss ideas and Dayana wants a nude woman against one of Trump’s famous ties for the image. Naturally she wants to be that hot naked girl. I am all for this concept. Sadly, a gay man is in charge.

Boobies for perfume? Ew!

Penn has a better idea, which unleashes the demon within.

What if I’m naked, but we hide my man boobs?

Um, I just said, no boobs.

What if she’s dying and I successfully save her?

Better, but no.

Excuse me, Miss Universe, but while you’re down there…

Dayana goes down on a successful man.
I love it! We’ve got our concept.

To go along with their blow job theme, Penn suggests their slogan be “you earned it.” The team is ready to rock and roll with their vision.

At Unanimous, Teresa shouts out the name of the perfume in that same horrible voice she used for her Fabulina puppet. I notice throughout this episode that she continues to use that voice. I can’t stand it!

 

Aubrey captures the essence of the fragrance
while Teresa mainlines it right up the nose.

Aubrey wants Teresa to research display designs while she asks Arsenio to look up the actual meaning of success. Arsenio reads off a quote that fragrance is liquid money. Aubrey admonishes him that success isn’t about money, it’s about how much you improve someone’s life by giving of yourself.

Aubrey is successful because she bestows her
talent and wisdom on others every day.

Arsenio argues that in our commercial society, the Bentley and the paper are indicators of success. Aubrey is irritated by this crude and obvious choice of the money, sex, power angle. She thinks they should be different and fresh and come up with a losing concept that no one will like.

Are you there, God? I could use a little help down here.

The execs come in for consultations and the Macy’s exec tells team Forte that although she looks like an elf, she knows what she’s talking about and recommends they be very true to the product with their branding and slogan.

 

 

At Unanimous, Aubrey tries her “dazzle them with my brilliant words” tactic and gushes about how a man usually only buys what a woman wants him to buy.

 

Oh my God, you guys. Listen to how incredibly awesome I am.
I just put in these orange extensions to make my hair look fuller and now
I’m gonna make up some stupid shit on the fly to impress you with my insight
and professionalism, because I need you to realize I’m the only one doing creative here
and I’m way awesomer than these other two douche bags.

 

The execs respond with cricket chirps.

It’s hilarious as Aubrey backpedals and carefully says ” Basically, we need to really feel what this is saying to us and it’s the perspective of the product and it’s the perspective of the man that created the product that can be symbolic of any man out there.”

I see right through this piece of work.

After the execs leave, Aubrey proposes the following slogans;

1. See your vision; Success.

2. See your future; Success.

3. A step closer to happiness is Success.

 

Why isn’t anyone gasping in ecstasy at my ideas?

Don’t worry honey, you aren’t the only one out of touch. Teresa has confused the name of the perfume and her contributions consist of:

1. Confidence speaks to you.

2. Confidence says who you are.

3. Confidence defines you.

Then Aubrey proposes “Trust Your Instincts” because that’s what Trump does. Now maybe it is the editing that shows the next bit in the order that it does, but this will be important later; Aubrey proposes the slogan. Arsenio shows Aubrey a video where Trump actually says those exact words. The team agrees this is a clear sign from God that they have found their message. So according to this airing, Aubrey came up with the idea first. Remember that.

Naturally, because Aubrey has stumbled upon a pretty decent idea, she has to poop on it with her next concept. She wants to get a picture of Eric for the display to represent a young pre-success Donald Trump looking up at the world he has created. Makes no sense to me.

I don’t think her team is digging it either.

As Aubrey’s team is heading over to the shop to build their display, she decides to stop and capture a photo of the NY skyline. She recruits help from Arsenio.

Giddy up, lackey!

Arsenio comes on in confessional to tell us that Aubrey had a great idea, she wanted to put her vagina on the back of his neck.

Never mind, God. We good.

This was actually the first time Arsenio creeped me out a little. Or maybe it was just the idea of thinking about Aubrey’s vajajay. Either way nasty chills ran down my spine.

 

Team Forte has arrived at the building shop and Lisa tells us she put on her lesbian hard hat.


Hey, Lisa – looks like we have the same makeup artist. Woka woka woka!

Clay is struggling to envision what the display will look like.

I could build a song from a fart but I can’t handle this visual stuff.

Penn wants to practice with Dayana.

This is the full technical rehearsal, right?

The hot male model comes in that they will be using in their display and Clay is absolutely drooling.

Just let me do him – I mean his tie…

It appears the hotness was too much for Clay as Penn has to take over the shoot. Dayana comes on to tell us that Lisa has been nicer and seems less volatile. However, she knows she shouldn’t trust that it will last.

 


“Lisa better not be trying to bust my peanuts.”

Lisa wishes she was as pretty as Dayana.
Clay wishes he was Dayana.

At Unanimous, Aubrey has banished her team mates to search for vinyl covering for their set. They are wisely not going to paint – they have a construction foreman who seems really nice and helpful, unlike the douchey ego-builder the Forte group has to work with.

The banishment is a brilliant strategy to get VampEric all to herself.

VampEric arrives unannounced and takes a moment to assess Aubrey. She notices his arrival and they quickly get down to the business of modeling. Aubrey tells Eric he’s not so hard on the eyes and then she asks him, “What if I was just some crazy stalker and I wanted to get a lot of photos of you.”

“I think you might be.”

Thank goodness VampEric seems to understand that Aubs has seen all that gold in Daddy’s apartment and is working on a way to get a piece of it.

But all he really has to do is show her his favorite
birthday cake. Maybe that will dissuade her.

They get down to business discussing the task and Aubrey is in rare form lying her ass off. She tells Eric that neither Teresa nor Arsenio had any ideas and that Arsenio has never once given her an opinion in any of the tasks to date.

LIAR!!!!!

VampEric hasn’t been around for a million years for nothing. He sees through her bullshit and says he will scrutinize her that much more for the brown nosing “be my model” incident.

Team Forte is talking about what they will print for their poster. Dayana suggests they create a flier to hand out as a nice way to help the consumer remember their product. Clay says they don’t have time for such a silly thing; it is much more important that they be sanding and painting.

Speaking of painting, Teresa wins hustler of the week. She’s running around doing as much as she possibly can.

Nice clothes be damned.

At Forte, they are getting down to that all important painting and sanding task.

But Clay has forgotten to warn his teammates about
a sudden outbreak of a contagious disease.

Lisa decides to grab a bowl of popcorn and see what kind of show is on the other side of the partition.

She tiptoes over and gets a sneak peek, then rushes back to report it looks like both teams are doing a skyline concept. This has Clay gulping past his shaved adam’s apple in worry.

I’m just happy someone warned Dayana about the bio disaster.

It’s the next day and the Unanimous team is thrilled with the end result of their display piece. Aubrey says she’s very proud of herself and refers to herself as a mini Trump because she is so amazing and thought the whole thing up on her own. No kudos given to the people who turned her concept into real life.

Team Forte is loving their finished product as well.Except for Dayana who has noticed the flaws in their design and is worried the judges will also notice them. The team seems irritated by her lack of enthusiasm.

I think it is admirable that she doesn’t just stare at the poster and say,
“Yay me!” That is certainly what Aubrey or Debbie would have done.

Ancient troll George arrives to check on Aubrey’s team and he sets out to rub everyone the wrong way. He’s got a one upper for everything they say and it is clear he is pushing Aubrey’s buttons. She gives up trying to charm him and tells him they made a display that emulates Trump but is still something every man could get his hands on.

I’d like to get my hands on your tender flesh, pinky!
Might not even need my dentures.

Aubrey tells him that the silhouette is Eric, expecting this to charm the pants off the old geezer, but his response is simply, “Doesn’t look like Mr. Trump.” He also thought the buildings were Rolls Royce grills. I’m loving how he thwarts her “look at me”‘s; I wish he had to check on Aubrey for every task!

Laugh now, old man, but your days are numbered.

It’s the next day and there is a horrible noise coming from the Unanimous room. Seriously, it startled the poor cats in our house. What the hell was it?

Turns out it was Aubrey braying like a nervous mule.

Her presentation starts off great. The execs are smiling, she’s rolling the glib b.s. off her tongue charmingly and it seems like a good sell. Then she mentions the silhouette and the fact that it is Eric Trump.

Exhibit A of Aubrey’s great creative ideas

Elf exec says ick.

Things seem to go downhill form there. Aubrey tells the execs there is no face of their consumer. Also, she didn’t want to tell people what success is, since it can be something different for everyone. As an example, she asks Arsenio what his idea of success is, since he was a man the last time she checked.

 

What’s that supposed to mean? Did you sneak a peek while I was sleeping?

By the end, the presentation is redeemed with Arsenio’s cool grace and Teresa just being her cute raspy self (although she did the damn Fabulina voice again.) The bottle shaped hand out and the smell strips were a class act touch, for which, Aubrey deserves all the credit.

Sadly the entire team is struck by the deadly contagion just minutes later.

Team Forte is up at bat and Clay is talking about what the display case looks like and that the smell of success is sweet, one should reach out and grab it, because you earned it. That’s it. After an awkward pause he tells them he’d love to answer any of their question. Macy’s elf tells them to just go ahead and continue with the presentation.

Lady, I’m too tired to come up with any more bull shit about a perfume.

Oh crap, I should have written a script!

Since no one can be bothered to care that much about a stupid perfume that Donald Trump is launching, the two execs have to host themselves to discuss the pros and cons of the two performances.

We interrupt this program to bring you a few minutes of The View.

Talking to no one in particular, they decide that Aubrey killed it with the slogan and the smell strips but the design of the display was meh. For Forte, they loved the display design, especially the picture of Dayana, but they hated the slogan. Their consensus is that both teams had winning and losing elements.

BOARDROOM TIME!

Trump is in rare form and asks lots of questions without bothering to listen to the answers. Everyone is happy with their team’s performances and lots of ass kissing all around.

The teams examine their competitor’s work and Lisa adores the hand out and smell sticks created by Unanimous.

Eskimo kisses of congratulations.

Arsenio says that Dayana is stunning in the Forte display and a round of aye’s goes up at Trump’s statement that she is very beautiful. Not to be forgotten, Aubrey pipes in that they also used a sexy model and tells Sparky about her silhouette of Eric. Eric is flattered by the words and I’m getting worried about the smiles these two are exchanging. Eric, she is diabolical. And Aubrey, he’s a killer of endangered animals. You two do not suit!

The most important question of the evening is whether Aubrey prefers Eric’s hairline or Sparky’s hairline. I realize there are still forty minutes of programming to go and I contemplate suicide.

Eric addresses Aubrey’s claims that she was a one man show and she says she really did own all the ideas.

Arsenio thinks being poked in the eye would be less painful than Aubrey’s words.

He’s great at speaking with tact and gently points out that he thought he did contribute, since he found a quote from Sparky that became the product slogan.

Like any high-strung filly, Aubrey snorts in disdain.

Aubrey counters that she actually thought up the slogan before Arsenio showed her that and unfortunately, I have to agree with her on this one. Still, she should be able to offer some acknowledgement that Arsenio contributed.

Aubrey goes on to offend everyone by blowing smoke up Trump’s ass about how he is too innovative and forward thinking to just go with any old rock star, hot chick ad campaign for his fragrance.

Penn feels the sting of an Aubrey diss.

Sparky has VampEric and George review the pros and cons of each team. Why are we forced to watch this information twice? *sigh*

When they tell Forte that the best part was the picture and Trump tries to give Dayana the credit, she is quick to point out that Penn took the photo. I love this girl – she is a class act. Clay has a great point when he says if they felt the picture was too large, it doesn’t quite make sense, since they said the picture was the best part.  Penn acknowledges that the slogan was his idea and although he doesn’t see “You Earned It” as being pompous, he understands the criticism.

Since there is no clear definitive winner, Trump says he can’t dole out the 100K to the winning project manager. Instead, he will be giving 40K to the winning charity and every other charity at the table gets a check for ten grand.

With that, he announces that Aubrey is the winner. Is this a surprise to anyone? She was the last person to win any money for her charity and her team was down a player. Everything pointed to her winning this task even before they had created anything to present.

Unanimous goes back to the warroom to celebrate. Fabulina won’t shut up about how much she loves Trump and the Crystal champaigne, etc. AUbrey says if she had the brains of the other team on her team she probably could have wowed Trump and pulled out the 100K win. I don’t see how that’s possible when she won’t let anyone else do anything.

Back in the boardroom, there is a lot of focus on how much the execs hated the slogan that Penn created.  I become irritated when talk wanders to the size of the photo and Trump asks who had the idea to make it so big. Clay hems and haws without really pointing a finger. We clearly saw it was Lisa and Clay who wanted the picture bigger – Penn in fact expected it to be smaller during the design phase. So I’m already squinting at Clay suspiciously even before he tries to pawn off the fact that Dayana suggested the take away by saying he doesn’t understand what she says. Bitch, please! You totally understood her when you shot down her idea to create a flier. Then Lisa claims it was too late in the day when Dayana proposed the flier. This pisses me off even further, since they hadn’t even printed the picture yet, so there was clearly time to do another print job. Why’s everyone always gunning for the pretty girl?

Clay has to choose one person to escape and since we all feel bad about how insanely jealous Lisa is of Dayana’s natural beauty,

the oompa loompa gets a free pass.

This might be the dullest board room to date. I’m wishing there was a contagious outbreak so I could stop watching.

Clay brings back Penn and Dayana and I am surprised to learn that Dayana has broken a record for the number of times a person has been brought back to the boardroom without being fired. Well she sitll shouldn’t be fired for this one. She’s just the one target everyone is used to shooting at.

Since things are so boring in the board room let’s talk about something else. I know I’ve asked before but I still don’t have an answer. What the hell does Amanda do at that desk with her little message pad all day?

Dear Diary, today I took 234 messages. My hand writing wasn’t so good
by the last one. My gold scissors are shiny. I like frogs.

Trump says he wants to fire Dayana because she’s been in the board room a record 6 times. He says he wants to fire Clay because he was the projet manager. But it comes as no surprise that instead, Donald fires Penn for coming up with the slogan.

Frankly, Penn has been relatively quiet and I think he’s so tired of swinging between his gigs and this show that he’s more than happy to be fired.

So long to one of the smartest competitors on the show.

Gee whiz, Dad. I really liked Penn.
I don’t think I’m coming to the BBQ tonight.

Good, ’cause you’re not invited. This one’s all mine.
I got the teeth to cut that one down to size. See?

Can I go back to my coffin now?

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Luscious
About

Luscious just got back from a one year backpacking trip around the world with her husband (TVgasm fill-in specialist, The Professor). She spends her days writing, knitting and sewing. She's only good at one of those hobbies, not saying which.  Her secret dream is to write romance novels and have critics say her brilliance is wasted on such a pointless genre. Also, she'd like to create a pair of pajamas for her niece where the sleeves actually work.

66 Comments

  1. 1
    Flipit Flipit
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 9:54 am

    Had to unpublish the first recap and republish!! Tvgasm has kinda lost its mind this morning. Sorry for the trouble, Luscious!

  2. 2
    Musicleader
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 9:55 am

    Dammmm – where did my comments from this AM go? Did Aubrey hack into the computer with her brilliant mind and steal them?

  3. 3
    Luscious Luscious
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 9:59 am

    Sorry about that, readers. I’ll try to post your comments again.

  4. 4
    CattyFan cattyfan
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 10:00 am

    I always loved George and Caroline. They never held back with contestants. I would love to see Caroline dismantle some of these celebs.

  5. 5
    Luscious Luscious
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 10:00 am

    KartofflMuter said:
    This episode was a big hot mess. While I wasn’t thrilled with Clay’s hemming and hawing,what he was really angry about was that Dayana wanted to remove her clothes and that sort of surprised me a little. It turned Clay off and I think we lost a lot on the cutting room floor. The shocker was when Aubrey got her spanking and was either too dumb or-let’s just go with dumb-to notice. The prize was supposed to be $100,000! She wiggled her fat ass at Eric to get some brownie points. It totally failed to impress anyone. And Mr. Loyalty went back on his word by saying “he didn’t love it.” So the Aubs got $40,000 instead. True to her evil little soul,she stated on Leno that she got $60,000,claiming Arsinio’s and Theresa’s $20,000 as “hers”. Now ain’t that just typical? You think Sparky’s getting tired of the red queen of rude?

  6. 6
    Luscious Luscious
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 10:01 am

    Musicleader said:
    Another record set! You have successfully made me spit my coffee out SIX times while reading your hilarious review. Keep up the good work – you make my week. Just sad to think that after the May 20 finale, my life will be over without your CA review. That being said, however, I will be soooooo glad to see that gross ball of red synthetic horse hair and gigundo fake breasts of AO’s no longer on tv, ruining my Sunday night.
    (Thanks Music!)

  7. 7
    Luscious Luscious
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 10:02 am

    And Digger was our first dissenting voice:
    I don’t get all the Dayana love. She’s the female equivalent of Lou and is getting a free pass. She comes up with a giveaway 5 minutes before they shut down the printing. She looks good on the photo, that’s it. Her ideas are ridiculously stupid, she’s stupid, and her idea this week for saving her ass was looking at the sanding job and the last minute giveaway. I don’t like Lisa or how she talks to people, but she’s had this one pegged from the start. I’ll be glad to see the last of Dayana, hope she goes quickly.

    (boo!)

  8. 8
    See-Jay
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 10:12 am

    Penn got screwed.

  9. 9
    CattyFan cattyfan
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 10:21 am

    “Penn got screwed”

    So did Dee.

  10. 10
    Moli Moli
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 10:53 am

    Dude I had no idea what my Tablet was doing this morning.

  11. 11
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 11:05 am

    Big time. If I’m in a store staring at a bottle of generic stink-water with Trump’s label on it, I would be more persuaded by some suggestion that I’ve earned it, because if I trust my instincts I would think twice about supporting Trump’s massive ego by validating his notion that anything sells well as long as he slaps his brand on it.

  12. 12
    myfavoritesunglasses
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 11:10 am

    I was baffled by the exec’s use of the word “pompous” to describe Penn’s slogan. If the slogan had been “You *deserve* it”, THAT would have been pompous. But I completely fail to see how “You earned it” is pompous at all. I was kind of shocked by the decision, actually (other than that it was obv Aubrey’s turn to win) because I thought Clay’s team had hands down the better product.

    Unlike a lot of people though, I don’t love Penn, so I wasn’t sad to see him go. He is very bright, that much is clear, but in my opinion he comes off as kind of a douche about it.

    Great recap!!

  13. 13
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 11:14 am

    If Penn’s slogan was REALLY as bad as the execs said that it was, then surely somebody on Clay’s team would have wrinkled their nose. Nobody did. Using that reason to fire Penn, no matter who likes him or who doesn’t, is BULLSHIT.

  14. 14
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 11:37 am

    Aubrey’s ego is bigger than Trump’s and I think her balls are probably bigger too. She’s also very smart, so I’m gonna be watching her in the coming years because I am dying to find out if she ends up in the gutter or becomes a billionaire. I think which depends on if she can keep from wearing her narcissism on her sleeve for all to see.

  15. 15
    trkaelin
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 12:23 pm

    Do you think the Donald runs around in that apartment in his underwear, sitting on the couch eating Cheetos and drinking beer? What a gold-plated horror.

  16. 16
    trkaelin
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 12:43 pm

    Isn’t pomposity Donald’s stock in trade? I would have thought he would eat that shit up. Penn was cornholed.

  17. 17
    Krys
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 1:14 pm

    Dee got way more screwed over than Penn did honestly.

  18. 18
    April
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 1:17 pm

    Best Recap so far this season! You had me cracking up! Love the George as the living dead jokes along with the vampire jokes.

    Lisa was nicer this episode too. Aubrey is really going after Vamperic. I disagree though. I think she would make a GREAT addition to the Trump family! She is just as conceited as they all are! The whole Trump Success!!! thing was just too much! Ego the size of Africa.

  19. 19
    Krys
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 1:18 pm

    No, Clay did play devil’s advocate and even in confessional showed doubt, tried to speak but Penn spoke over him. Like Clay said in the BR, “Penn will pitch and pitch again til you are worn down.’ Penn did not care to be fired. Clay would have and I believe ratings would decline even more if Clay got the boot. When Penn shrugged his shoulders to DT’s lecture of bad slogan I knew at that point Penn was gone. No fight left.

  20. 20
    April
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 1:18 pm

    I agree but I knew he would be the one that got fired because he was not going to fire Clay, Dayana or Lisa.

  21. 21
    April
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 1:21 pm

    I think Dayana is not as useless as they say. She is a hard worker and occasionally has good ideas. I do agree though that she several times has pulled the idea at the last minute to save my ass routine. She did it with the tour guide one. It is not feasible at that point. She should give out these ideas at the beginning of the task!

  22. 22
    April
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 1:22 pm

    It makes my week too! Actually while I watch the episodes I laugh and think about how much fun you are going to have with this or that going on when you make the recap. LOL!

  23. 23
    April
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 1:24 pm

    Oh yeah did anyone else notice Aubrey’s spanx showing when she got on Arsenio!? I think I saw it. I mean I wear spanx too because anyone besides Dayana will need them but I certainly don’t want them showing on national tv!

  24. 24
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 2:00 pm

    Penn hectored Clay into using the slogan? How many slogans were offered by other team members or the PM himself? They rejected better slogans because Penn is a bully?

    It still seems like bullshit to me to fire a guy for offering a slogan. If a bad slogan is rejected, then who offered it is safe, but if the entire teams thinks it’s okay, then he get fired if it turns out that Trump’s advisers don’t like it

  25. 25
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 2:03 pm

    For what reason? Is it because you like Dee and you don’t like Penn?

  26. 26
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 2:24 pm

    Trump can (and does) fire anybody on the show as it pleases him to do so, but it still pisses me off to hear his stupid, disingenuous reasons that have nothing to do with the real reasons.

  27. 27
    OnePostWonder
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 2:29 pm

    I might have to go back and look but I thought I heard DT say that *He* liked the slogan.

  28. 28
    Krys
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 2:50 pm

    Dee was thrown under the bus by Lou when Lou should’ve been fired before Dee. I betcha Dee would still get the boot but he would’ve lasted longer, I believe. And yes I am not a huge fan of Penn’s so I am a little bias.

  29. 29
    Krys
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 2:55 pm

    Do you have a response for everything? It seems you need to post a reply to ever single person on here. Penn seemed to think he had the best idea in the world. Now, do I think he should have been fired? No, but neither did Clay so had I been DT I’d fire Dayana for consistently being asked back into the BR. Clay was left hanging during the presentation by his teammates and when prompted by Clay that he was stuck they did not come to his rescue. Why? You have Penn and Lisa who are performers for a living, who have how many years of improv under their belts?

  30. 30
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 3:01 pm

    Fair enough. Thinking back, I was shocked that Trump kept Lou over Dee. Shocked, I tell you. With, Penn it was more like, “Well, somebody had to go.”

  31. 31
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 3:02 pm

    Damnit. This was supposed to show up as a reply to Krys.

  32. 32
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 3:03 pm

    Yeah. What of it?

  33. 33
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 3:04 pm

    Again, to Krys, who doesn’t like me replying to posts.

  34. 34
    cherryred
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 3:58 pm

    it’s called editing – we don’t see EVERYTHING they do in the work rooms, only what’s necessary to move the story forward and whatever is dramatic. There might have been tens of slogans pitched but they only focused on that one because it was the catalyst of the episode.

    Clay should have been fired period. But that would have sucked the show into a vortex of evil. Penn is a brilliant man, but a boring contestant, especially after having to spend so much time with Lisa. Once they split the teams up his eagerness for this show seemed to shrivel up and die the longer he had to endure the endless negativity of Lisa.

  35. 35
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 4:12 pm

    “There might have been tens of slogans pitched but they only focused on that one because it was the catalyst of the episode.

    That’s what I’m saying. If there were tens of slogans pitched, and if any one of them were better than “You earned it” then they should have used it. Clay was acting like Penn forced it on him, and that is why they lost. Poor Clay.

  36. 36
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 4:46 pm

    Cranky has a response for “everything” because we vote by proxy at times, especially when we’re busy.

  37. 37
    wow
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 4:51 pm

    I definitely got the feeling that Donald disagreed with the execs and that he liked Penn’s slogan as well. Even if it was pompous, why is that a problem for a Trump product? He loves that crap.

  38. 38
    wow
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 4:53 pm

    Exactly! I thought that was strange, that fits in with his brand completely.

  39. 39
    Musicleader
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 5:57 pm

    Good Lord peeps. The Trumpster and producers make decisions that will help the show keep viewers – why keep chewing the cud, commiserating over the slogan, who liked it or didn’t, who came up with it, blah, blah, blah.

    I am just still amazed what the contestants can get done in a period of two days (incl. the sweaty Boardroom that supposedly goes on ad nauseum with no air conditioning.) Not much time to come up with a decent concept, let alone BRAIN-freakin-STORM or word weed.

    Gotta luv it for what it is – entertainment…and it makes it all worthwhile for me at least because of the money that goes to charity (no sh-t).

  40. 40
    chaosbutterfly
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 9:31 pm

    I think it was obvious that Clay wasn’t wild over the slogan, but it’s his fault for not insisting that he didn’t like it. You know if it was Aubrey, she would have said outright that she didn’t like it and that he needed to come up with something else, fuck what the group thought. That’s what she always does, and most of the time, that’s not the right way to go about things, but in that case, it was exactly the kind of attitude that Clay needed.
    Personally, I actually thought it was perfect for Donald Trump, who is the most entitled asshole on the face of the planet. But the point is that Clay didn’t like it, and it turns out the execs didn’t like it either. If Clay had been more assertive and demanded that they think of another slogan (aka be a strong project manager), maybe his team would have won, because Aubrey’s display looked like a craft project.

    And on top of failing to shut down bad ideas, Clay failed to take good ones, like Dayana’s idea for a takeaway piece, which made perfect sense to me. I mean, even if you don’t want a pamphlet, to not even come up with a customized smell stick or one of those little fold-up smelly sticky papers? A customized smell stick would have taken two seconds and they had a graphic designer there…slap the logo on top of a regular stick and there you go. What perfume display does NOT have one of those? Come on, son. And he understood what she was saying, so I lost so much respect for him for playing that bullshit card. AND he so colossally fucked up that presentation that it wasn’t even funny. And he picked the wrong person for the boardroom. Why bring Daya when Lisa appeared to do nothing this task but eat popcorn and spy? Bitch couldn’t even come up with a script for the presentation.

    If Dee Snider could get tossed out over some words on a box, Clay needed to go for messing up so many things.
    But, I’m okay with Penn going home. I liked him for the first two episodes and then after that, he just got on my nerves.

  41. 41
    June1
    Posted April 25, 2012 at 10:13 pm

    Unanimous was going to win regardless of anything else. Aubrey had not won a task for her charity (other than $10K for her tears…). I did see scent sticks in the Forte’s display although they didn’t have the info card/flyers. It all boiled down to which team they wanted to win this time — and it was Unanimous.

    I was disappointed that Clay’s team members stood there like bumps on a log with no help for the presentation whatsoever. Where was Penn’s “braininess” or Lisa’s “creativity, writing, & improv skills”, or Dayana’s chatter? Arsenio & Theresa did try to help Aubrey even with the way they seem to feel about her. Felt like to me that Penn, Lisa, & Dayana wanted Clay’s presentation to fail.

    IMO, Penn needed to go. He had checked out sometime ago & seemed only to be partly engaged. I did hate to see Dee go — and Paul, Sr., too. Really liked those guys.

  42. 42
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted April 26, 2012 at 5:21 am

    Methinks Penn’s slogan hit too close to the Trump mansion.

  43. 43
    DaisyHurts
    Posted April 26, 2012 at 2:33 pm

    If Clay had stood his ground against Penn, Penn might have shut down and stopped helping at all, the way he did during the mop commercial episode. Plus, Lisa, who’s a good friend of Penn’s, might have taken his side and gone into raging bitch mode. So Clay had no choice but to handle both of them with kid gloves if he wanted to have any display to present at all.

    As for Dayana, you can hardly blame him for angling to get her fired before either him or Penn. Most of her suggestions were worse than useless–they were deranged. You can’t put a big picture of a tie lying between naked breasts next to the perfume counter at Macy’s! People shop there with their children, for Christ’s sake. And then there was the non-sequitor she offered up as a slogan. Her one useful suggestion was offered up too late in the day for it to be used.

    The only thing she’s really good at is making people scream at her, so she can look more sympathetic. For weeks now, we’ve all been focusing on how evil Lisa is, and how sweet, calm, and mature Dayana seems next to her, while we’ve ignored how incompetent Dayana is. And she knows this, and is deliberately pushing Lisa’s buttons to accomplish it! Look at the little smile on her face whenever Lisa goes off on her.

  44. 44
    Robin Robinez
    Posted April 26, 2012 at 5:32 pm

    I would love to see a Clay/Lisa -V- Aubrey/Dayanna

    Dayanna is easy to get along with, isn’t pushy, and has had some good ideas. Aubrey does tend to run roughshod over folks but she is receptive when she is one on one with someone and does recognise individual strengths. I think they would make the perfect team.

    Clay and Lisa on the other hand, would be like oil and water. They are both bitches and they both have a temper and they both think they are right all the time. Clay will cover Lisa’s mouth while she is trying to talk and Lisa will call Clay a terrible word. Fun all around!

    I would love to see this.

    Thanks for the recap, Luscious. I appreciate it.

    Robin

  45. 45
    leslilly
    Posted April 26, 2012 at 6:33 pm

    Luscious, I laughed so many times at your recap – by the time I got to the picture of Dobby the house elf, I nearly peed myself! I also love your last pic of Sparky. Have you ever noticed the face he makes after he fires someone he likes. It is HIGH-larious! He does a pouting thing w/his bottom lip…the entire thing, coupled with his squinty eyes and gesticulating hands slays me. He is inadvertently funny.

    I also got a big laugh this week when he said Trump ties are the #1 selling ties in the world, hahahahahaha! Everything with him is #1, the best, most sucessfuland so on…so funny. AND, when the execs said that “You’ve earned it” was too pompous a tagline for Trump, I thought “seriously”? I mean, we’re talking about Trump here. Trump = pomposity :)

  46. 46
    leslilly
    Posted April 26, 2012 at 6:39 pm

    LOL LOL!!! I’m dying at this image. It’s perfect. All you left out is Trump burping, farting and demanding that Melania get him a second beer.

  47. 47
    leslilly
    Posted April 26, 2012 at 6:43 pm

    Agreed, crank! Trump’s rhyme and reason varies by the minute. He has his favorites and pulls out his variety of reasons to not fire them out of his ass.

  48. 48
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 26, 2012 at 6:46 pm

    I’m just guessin’ here . . . just guessin’ that you’re a longtime Clay fan.

  49. 49
    leslilly
    Posted April 26, 2012 at 6:49 pm

    Ha!

  50. 50
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted April 27, 2012 at 4:24 am

    Hmmmph! Robin, with perception like that it’s easy to see why you’ll never be on reality tv.

  51. 51
    DaisyHurts
    Posted April 27, 2012 at 2:54 pm

    Just guessin’ here… just guessin’ that you’re a longtime Penn fan.

  52. 52
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 27, 2012 at 7:02 pm

    Ah, so my guess was right. I knew it. Clay fans like who Clay likes and hate who Clay hates. Clay doesn’t like Penn, so Clay fans don’t like Penn.

    Your guess is wrong, however. I just like Penn far better than Clay from what I have seen of them on this show. Other than that, I don’t give a shit about Penn.

  53. 53
    gr
    Posted April 28, 2012 at 2:31 am

    Hah! are you a misanthrope or not? I don’t find you like anyone, which is funny. :D

  54. 54
    DaisyHurts
    Posted April 28, 2012 at 2:19 pm

    Where’s a rolling eyes emoticon when you need one?

    “Clay fans like who Clay likes and hate who Clay hates?” Since when? And in any case, how would that apply to me? Because unlike you, I managed to notice what a smug, conceited, manipulative asshole Penn is? News flash: According to his Celebrity Apprentice blog on NBC and several tweets, Clay LIKES Penn. How, I do not know, but he does.

  55. 55
    Robin Robinez
    Posted April 28, 2012 at 3:32 pm

    Was that a good “Hmmmph” or a bad “Hmmmph?

    Hmmmphs always confuse me.

    TC, Robin

  56. 56
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted April 28, 2012 at 3:43 pm

    Well, Robin, so much depends on body language with a “Hmmmmph.” Looking at my avatar, I can see that my “Hmmmph” would be confusing.

    Not being chosen for a reality show is a positive, isn’t it?

  57. 57
    leslilly
    Posted April 28, 2012 at 4:28 pm

    YES! I would love to see that as well. I wonder where the heck Caroline vanished to – I seem to recall that she left (resigned?) from Trump’s Golf Courses

  58. 58
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 28, 2012 at 4:49 pm

    Clay likes Penn? Ok, and Aubrey’s definition of success is how much she helps other people, not in how rich or famous she becomes. @@

    How can you see a sweetheart like Penn and think you are looking at an asshole? And how can you look at Clay and not see that he is a whiner and an asshole?

  59. 59
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted April 28, 2012 at 4:55 pm

    Well, gr. I’ll tell you. I like Penn, as he presented himself on the show, but that does not make me a fan, since I would not spend any money to see his act, and I couldn’t care less about his life in general. I like Dee. I like Arsenio. I like Dayana.

  60. 60
    KartofflMuter
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 9:51 am

    Clay likes almost everybody. He tries to get along with everybody. If you know his history (and I’m a longtime fan and watching this show only because of Clay) he had a very screwed up childhood with his mother grabbing him shortly before his 1st birthday and running for her life from his father and her husband. He’s a pleaser. He was a very bullied child;tall, gangly, awkward, insecure, with a step father who didn’t like him,step siblings, 2 pairs of shoes a gift for singing,a desire to help autistic children, the only competitor never in the bottom 3 on Idol. We all know he really won,but the phones couldn’t handle the volume of calls. After Idol,he went BACK to school and finished his degree.He started a foundation for inclusion for Autistic children at 24-his Charity. He worked for Unicef going to Africa a Banda Ace and Mexico and Afghanistan ,etc. for disaster relief (even though he’s terrified of water) and when he was in college,his sister called,he missed the call,and she shot herself to death. A complicated man who rarely gets angry. Ten years ago,he would never have said, “I’m a grown-ass man.” His mama would have spanked him. But he’s faced even more since then so, I celebrate his anger. And Dayana’s passive aggressive. And however talented Penn is,he does steamroll his opposition. Clay has chosen his battles and when he could have sent Penn to the boardroom,he didn’t. Remember that. It was Trump who said the week before that Dayana needs to go (and Aubrey too). Trump separated Clay and Arsenio because they would just have played “nice” and he didn’t want that. His show,his rules.

  61. 61
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 10:07 am

    That’s a lot of Clay information. You are kind of like a Clay evangelist. So, who among those left would you like to see win, other than Clay? Aubrey? Lisa? Arsenio? New Jersey Housewife? If I could be Trump, I would already predetermine no matter what they do from here on out that Aubrey goes next, followed in order by Lisa, NJHousewife, and Clay, with Arsenio winning. If Clay wins, I won’t be as happy about it as you will be, but I’ll like it much better than if any of the remaining women win.

  62. 62
    KartofflMuter
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 10:53 am

    Arsenio. Unlike Aubrey,I don’t think he’s losing his mind, getting senile,yet still strong enought to bully her. He and Clay hit it off immediately and he also tries to “get along” with people. He tries a little too hard when it comes to Aubrey. I’d have tripped her by know or asked if anybod else smells manure when she walks into the room-but I’m older and I have more insurance. Think of me as Kathy Bates with a larger hammer and enough anger to use it. But let’s face it-would Clay get a blog if he wasn’t in the Endgame? Please don’t call me an Evangelist Rotflmaowst. I’m 1/2 Jew/ 1/2 Catholic. Hate Christians. I have forgiven Clay for being one. How’s that? That’s my wedding picture up there. I married a Hindu. That’s what happens when you escape Nazi Germany. I also hate red hair and tall people and Southerners but I’m forgiving. He’s that good.

  63. 63
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 11:06 am

    Well, if you are going to hate certain groups of people, then the only ones left that aren’t protected under the umbrella of political correctness are Christians, gingers, and rednecks in the southeastern United States, so please make sure you confine your hate only to that. You can be anti-Jesus and anti-Christian and still be an evangelist for something or somebody.

  64. 64
    KartofflMuter
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 11:38 am

    Now who said I hate Jesus? I like him well enough. I prefer Mary. And the Virgin of Guadalupe. I’m big on Ganpati and Shiva and Krishna and Ram Sita,and Radha and Durga and Kali which by Indian standards,makes me a liberal as well. Different parts of India have their own favorites and their own names for the Gods and the Gods have various different incarnations (so Durga IS Kali and Ganpati Siva and Parvati’s son),but you can buy pictures of Jesus on any street corner-they just added Him to the pantheon. India is bizarre.I’m a ginger.My daughter lives in Shreveport. My father was a Catholic altar boy and a German soldier. And my mother told me .”never trust a Roumanian and don’t turn your back on a Turk.” The part about tall southern christians I learned on my own. But seriously-I don’t hate (dislike intensely ) everyone. I wanted to be a hermit when I was 9. Never really changed my mind. My short ginger dog agrees.

  65. 65
    NotWithoutMyTV notwithoutmytv
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 11:56 am

    ”never trust a Roumanian and don’t turn your back on a Turk.”

    Well, duh! Who didn’t learn that one at their mother’s knee??

  66. 66
    KartofflMuter
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 11:32 pm

    Well sure,I taught it to my kids. Wouldn’t you? But for the the first day of school ,I added, ” Put your hands on me and draw back a nub.” My kids were voted “most likely to.”I’m Hungarian. Look up our history. You’ll see why my mother felt the way she did.A lot of knees were missing thanks to Turks.

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