The 12 Men of Xmas Recap

EJ goes to the post office once again and runs into the only person in town that gives her grief, Mr. Mountain Man. But boy does she stand up to him like the powerful little bobble-head lady that she is. The only thing she was missing was a finger snap.

EJ goes fishing to ask man #11 to pose for the calendar. But then she falls in the creek! Hahahah! Oh silly E.J, fishing is for boys.

As EJ works on her next victim for the calendar, man #12, she runs in to none other than Mr. Mountain Man? Is there anywhere she can go in this town without running into him?

Now that all the men are signed up for the calendar, they slip into paranoia about their looks, watching their weight and their nose hairs. Just like ladies.

E.J and man #11 go out to the movie theater to see Wizard of Oz.  Next week, they go see a talkie.

Since the date went so well, man #11 has asked her to a sailing party date. This means she has to find an outfiiiiit! The only problem is, this town seriously lacks fashion. I mean, when will they finally open a Barney’s in the mountains where you can’t go 3 feet without stepping into a mud pile with your Manolos?

While shopping, EJ runs into a like-minded individual who loves her “fresh breath of cynicism”. Oh New Yorkers! So cynical, yet oddly, nothing makes them happier than another’s cynicism.

It turns out the one other cynic in the town is someone EJ sent a press kit to! Her PR plan for this sleepy mountain town is working! Now she can turn it into the bustling tourist trap they’ve always aspired to be!

What is this? Trouble in paradise? After spending the whole day shopping at less-than-desirable shops, man #11 cancels on her. But Lifetime makes sure you know what a douche he really is, even though EJ can’t see it yet, by showing him on the phone telling her how sick he is while walking briskly along the street with fresh flowers. Who could those flowers be for? He must be two-timing her. At least that’s what Lifetime wants you to believe. He may actually be taking flowers to his granny in the hospital, but if I know Lifetime plots, EJ must be scorned at least one more time before she finds Mr. Right. The rule of Lifetime Threes.

So she goes to the sailing party in an adorable-if-you’re-a-fifty-year-old-woman-who-frequents-Talbots outfit only to find that they aren’t going sailing sailing. They are going Abseiling, which means they are repelling down the side of a mountain. What a hilarious mix-up! How is she ever going to repel down a mountain with those 3” wedges??!!