Commentgasm: Best in Comments: June 2012

Recaps

By ApplePie | Monday, December 24, 2012 | 7:00 am | 10 Comments
Tagged: , , ,
Posted in: Commentgasm, Featured, Recaps

sheesh on “RHOC Recap: Indecent Proposals”:  I would think that a fur coat is not the wisest choice of gift for a woman who has just boarded the menopause train.

sarcasatire on “MasterChef Recap: Aprons Don’t Grow on Trees”:  I’m pretty sure David is Delta Work out of drag. With a little less FUPA.

Bed Head Jen on “Teen Mom Recap: Anger Detox”:   I am unsure of the exact location that my husband and I conceived, but Farrah has inspired me to figure it out.  I thought it would be a fine General Foods International Coffee moment to share with my daughter. We can follow the moment with an ugly cry in Farrah’s honor.

Jason “RHONJ Minicap 3″:  Caro acts like she’s Rose Kennedy and spawned a whole passel of future Presidents, Senators, lawyers and doctors, but in reality her kids are about as useless as jellybeans in a tuna casserole.

Dawn Key on “Miss Advised Recap: Desperation is as Desperation Does”:  If she has a 73 point checklist, 71 of the points better be “has vital signs” and the other two should be “blind” and “deaf.”

Waffleboy on “Miss Advised Recap: Are You Lonesome Tonight”:  Emily says she’s been in a vortex of weird dates where she ends up with bisexual dudes who like to be penetrated while playing Scrabble.  Wow, that brings a whole new meaning to double word score. Also this is the moment I became a Boogle fan.

sagittariuskim on “Hollywood Exes Recap: Mortgages and Stretch Marks”:  What’s a vagina rejuvenation? I would google it but I’m scared about what might pop up.

 

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10 Comments

  1. 1
    Chicken Lips
    Posted December 24, 2012 at 4:46 pm

    ApplePie, wouldn’t you rather your daughter learns those types of words at home rather on the cruel, cruel playground at kindergarten? Congrats on her mad skillz!

  2. 2
    ApplePie
    Posted December 24, 2012 at 5:20 pm

    @CL, very good point! I want to be the one to destroy her dreams, make her cry, and disappoint her in general … but woe to anyone else who tries do so!

  3. 3
    sagittariuskim sagittariuskim
    Posted December 24, 2012 at 5:39 pm

    Yay I was funny twice this year so far. Although I was trying to be funny with either of the comments that have made Commentgasm.

  4. 4
    sagittariuskim sagittariuskim
    Posted December 24, 2012 at 5:40 pm

    *wasn’t

  5. 5
    CynTV CynTV
    Posted December 24, 2012 at 11:43 pm

    Wow. I am snarkier than I thought!

    Thank God!

  6. 6
    niknakflipflop niknakflipflop
    Posted December 25, 2012 at 7:26 am

    Went to the “Scotty McCreery Graduated” page and just wanted to give awfuleyebrow a shout out! Very funny!

  7. 7
    Chris Velazquez
    Posted December 25, 2012 at 9:59 am

    It figures, I manage to make it on one of the funniest comments of the month, and I end up spelling my last name wrong by one letter. Great, now my OCD’s gonna act up till I get a goddamn aneurysm.

  8. 8
    ApplePie
    Posted December 25, 2012 at 3:10 pm

    @Chris Velazquez, I am SO sorry. Of course you didn’t misspell your own name (though I often misspell my own), that was all me! I grew up in El Paso, where there were a lot of “Velasquez” families and I did not know a single “Velazquez”. Now, I finally meet the elusive “Velazquez” and I make a seriously bad first impression. Though I am a good speller in general, I am terrible with names and I apologize because I can’t correct the article now.

  9. 9
    Classy Drunk Classy Drunk
    Posted December 25, 2012 at 5:43 pm

    Yes…so Flipit, apple pie and myself RULE because we grew up in El Paso…no wait…I’ve rarely thought growing up in El Paso was a good thing outside of hamburger stand and Panchos

  10. 10
    Irishkate
    Posted December 29, 2012 at 3:02 pm

    Holy crap! One of my comments made it?! I’ve made it! That Lauren person of the teeth fixing post responded to my comment with outrage of my use of the term “hilljack” and not the incest.

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