Dancing With The Stars: Spice Up Your Life!

Now that Mel B. AKA Scary Spice knows her baby Daddy, she will be serving people on the dance floor as she joins the cast of Dancing With The Stars. Do you know how exciting this is? People of the World, Spice Up Your Life!

Between the paternity test with that Donkey we call Eddie Murphy, getting eloped, the Spice Girls reunion tour and now Dancing With The Stars, it’s been a pretty crazy year for Scary.

Don’t call it a comeback – Ah ah ah ah – Eddie Murphy’s baby momma gonna knock you out, Mel B.’s gonna knock you out. huah. And, for the record, can somebody tell me what kind of hair she is using for her weave, because it is looking good Gurl!

You tell me if you think she’ll have a hard time on the show once you take a look at the other cast members:

Jennie Garth- um..Kelly Taylor from 90210??? RAD! Season 4, Ian Ziering??? The 90210 cast is just whoring themselves aren’t they? I would have loved to see Shannen Doherty on this cast too. That would have been an amazing hair-pulling cat fight, I mean…reunion.

Wayne Newton- Mr. Las Vegas, the Summer wind just blew into the cast.

Mark Cuban – Dallas Maverick’s owner, and HDNet founder…think he bought his way into the show?

Josie Maran – The only reason anyone bought a Sports Illustrated Swimsuit addition 7 years ago.

Sabrina Bryan – I hope her and Wayne hook up, that would be serious daddy complex, and so dirty…Grrr Daddy.

Marie Osmond – She’s country, she’s rock ‘n’ roll, she’s nuts.

Jane Seymour – Dr. Quinn to the rescue…she’s coming on her horse and buggy, so it might be a while.

Helio Castroneves – The two-time winner of the Indianapolis 500. Also came out with an awesome new cell phone called the Ocean.

Floyd Mayweather – 6-time reigning world champion boxer…I have some advice for you: if you can’t dance, use the Tyson approach and just bite your partners ear…its gets them eeevverytime.

Cameron Mathison – All My Children Star, and reality star of, “I Want To Be A Soapstar”. I think he’s most likely to have the white man’s overbite when he dances.

Albert Reed – who? Apparently he’s an Abercrombie model…and actor, and musician…and “I’ll do just about anything to get recogniton…I’m still trying to figure things out, I’m good at everything…its so hard being me…” Being around you, too. God help us.

Dolly Parton is going to be the show’s first guest singer, and Avril Lavigne is set to perform later in the season. For the record…the thought of Avril sharing the stage with Dolly made me just shart myself.

All in all, I’m sticking to my pick which is Mel B. She’s hot, she’s scary, and she’s got amazing hair extentions.