Recap: Dancing with the Stars Results: Girls Night Out?

Dancing w/ The Stars

By B-Side | Thursday, November 2, 2006 | 5:17 pm | 10 Comments

Ah, the results show for Dancing With The Stars. Nothing comes close to this filler-tastic hour of TV. American Idol comes close, but even they mercifully keep their results to a curt thirty minutes (usually). Anyway, it’s not really worth a full-scale recap, but we can’t just let it go uncommented on. Therefore, we present to you a photo recap of last night’s tumultuous episode. Enjoy!

The show begins with the dancers reflecting on their performances. Oddly enough, no one mentions the half pint of glittery vegetable oil Cheryl has poured on her chest.

Monique’s cha cha cha is chosen as the encore of the night. Yup, she’s a goner.

Is that Jessica Simpson? No, it’s her knock-off, Willa Ford, back to enchant us with a musical performance!

Il Divo, or as I call them: Il Sucko.

Ironically, Willa sings “Fame,” a quality of which she has none. I’m pretty sure the only thing that’s gonna live forever is the sound of her growling voice.

Thoughts and opinions from Mariah Carey!

**SILENCE. We care not for former dancers, Anna and Jonathan!**

At last! Il Divo takes the stage to perform a cheesy, Italian version “Without You.” Hilarity ensues.

**Seriously. Seriously.**

Il Divo = Il Triple-Speed-Fastforward-o.

This girl just found out she’s gonna be ballroom dancing in front of judges. This would be fascinating if I hadn’t been fast forwarding over this segment all season long.

“Wait… have people been watching me on national TV every single week?”

With an enthusiastic “Check It Out!”, Samantha Harris introduces us to “Swop” — the fusion of Swing and Hip Hop. It’s similar to her hosting style: stutter-kward.

Hey, this is pretty cool…

I could do that.

Huh. This was kind of the best part of the entire season.

When asked to describe Emmitt, Len gladly brandishes the word “FUNKY!” He then adds, “Like myself, natch.”

Mario and Monique in the bottom two. Yeah, you’re screwed, Mo.

Yup. Monique’s sent home.

Okay, seriously, stop hugging.

Monique embraces the ghost of Shirley Hemphill!

We do this at TVgasm all day long…

Comments (10)
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10 Comments

1

Pinky101

Posted November 2, 2006 at 6:04 pm

Is that a third nipple on Cheryl Burke?
2

HoneyBunny

Posted November 2, 2006 at 7:16 pm

Monique with her black lipstick and chartreuse hotpants had to go! And now that we have weeded out all the female “stars” (cough cough) we are down to the Battle of the Y chromosomes. I am cheering for the one with the biggest Y!

What’s Happening!

hb
3

erinkg

Posted November 2, 2006 at 10:35 pm

Wow, Willa was terrible. You’d think she’d have taken a singing lesson by now – but she was allll kermit voice.

Oh, and when that dancing group came out, the song (Crazy in Love) freaked me out because the singers were so bad. I mean, come on, Jay Z and Beyonce? Ridiculous. Then, all of a sudden the girl dancers had flats on – it looked really weird. The girls look much better with heels.
4

SaveFerris

Posted November 3, 2006 at 6:24 am

I bet that was the first (and mostly only time) Willa Ford sang on national tv.
5

may1

Posted November 3, 2006 at 8:01 am

That photo recap was great B-side.
Willa was horrible. No wonder I never heard of her. (I bet they hire her to sing next season) Shirley Hemphill?!!
I love you, B-side.
6

livemusicjunkie

Posted November 3, 2006 at 4:16 pm

well, I must say, I know am a little more convinced that this show has integrity. I honestly thought they were going to send home Emmitt or Joey simply to keep a girl in there longer. SO glad that didn’t happen! I guess

Mario’s going to take this thing, which I guess is deserved as far as dancing goes. But that guy seriously annoys me. I wish there was a way for Joey or Emmitt to win. Oh well – at least we get another week of them.
7

TinkerbellAPixie

Posted November 4, 2006 at 10:50 am

Il Divo = Il Triple-Speed-Fastforward-o.

I loved that! Only B-Side would do a screencap of a fast forward blur.
8

urbangypsy

Posted November 6, 2006 at 8:50 am

Il Divo did not sing in Italian, they sang in Spanish. That version of Without You has been around for as long as I remember (and believe me, if your mother belted it out at least once a week when you were a kid, you would too).
9

mrbwood2you

Posted November 15, 2006 at 11:15 pm

Really, is this show actually on the air? What year is this?
yikes
10

Kate

Posted November 17, 2008 at 7:33 pm

Hello! Does anyone know the song the one couple danced to, something about the steps of love? Sorry I can’t be more specific!