From the Brimming With Originality Department

Desperate Housewives

By B-Side | Tuesday, December 27, 2005 | 12:05 pm | 12 Comments

Here’s something fresh! Desperate Housewives creator Marc Cherry has announced that the scene-stealing Bree Van De Kamp will be turning into an alcoholic. Ah yes. No better way to address the season two detractors than by serving up the most clichéd and maudlin plot thread out there. Here’s the thing. No one actually enjoys the depressing descent into substance abuse and rehab. Let’s not forget Kirsten Cohen on The OC. Oh, how we enjoyed her constant chugging of white zins and champagne. But as soon as her drinking became an “issue,” it became instantly tiresome. So please, Marc Cherry, for the love of all things original, don’t force us down this well-traveled path.

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12 Comments

  1. 1
    EdHill
    Posted December 27, 2005 at 1:33 pm

    Eh, I wouldnt worry too much. Lynette was a junkie last season for like 4 episodes and then they dropped it and moved on. Soap opera’s have short memories. Now if they could make Gabrielle a red hot lesbian nympho, THAT would be a plot twist.

  2. 2
    The Svan
    Posted December 27, 2005 at 1:36 pm

    The Svan agrees with EdHill on the lesbian nympho.

  3. 3
    Lame
    Posted December 27, 2005 at 2:32 pm

    Lame, that’s why I don’t watch it anymore!!!

  4. 4
    Donna Martin Graduates!
    Posted December 27, 2005 at 4:21 pm

    Lame, are you talking to yourself?!

  5. 5
    Leah3t
    Posted December 28, 2005 at 8:06 am

    Alcholism is out. Let’s seem some ecstasy addition or something like that. or maybe huffing on some housecleaning fluid.

    though i am excited to see Bree go to battle with her horrible son.

  6. 6
    EdHill
    Posted December 28, 2005 at 8:36 am

    Two words.

    Autoerotic asphyxiation

  7. 7
    BigMax
    Posted December 28, 2005 at 11:19 am

    Yay auto-erotic lesbian nymphos.

    Apparently, the Oxygen channel believes that the utter depths of alcohol and drug abuse brings in the audience…I’m sure it will be covered in today’s news.

  8. 8
    katieshole
    Posted December 29, 2005 at 7:52 am

    Auto-erotic lesbian nymphos?

    Edhill, I thought you watched DH to escape the reality of your life, aren’t there a lot of auto-erotic lesbian nymphs running around the TVgasm offices? : )

    Please, Bree is an alkie? Big whoop de doo!

    KH

  9. 9
    EdHill
    Posted December 29, 2005 at 9:26 am

    katieshole, while its true there are a lot of lesbians who practice Autoerotic asphyxiation in the TVgasm offices, they are usually half passed out and are consequently kind of boring to be around.

  10. 10
    Fuzzbait
    Posted December 31, 2005 at 12:32 am

    don’t forget, EdHill, that’ they’re all midgets, too!

  11. 11
    Kim M.
    Posted December 31, 2005 at 3:49 pm

    This show hits too close to home. I was also once a hit but now my hype has died down. hey atleast I know im not alone. Edhill is practically my clone.

  12. 12
    Kim M.
    Posted December 31, 2005 at 3:51 pm

    Oh and by the way ive seen “The Svan” posts and your habit of third person usage. Unfortunatley, everything you say seems like you need to repeat your name so we dont forget the idiot that stated such idiocy. Happy new year sir.

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