DWTS All-Stars Recap: Guilty As Charged

Recaps

By PopePhilly | Thursday, October 25, 2012 | 11:00 am | 20 Comments
Posted in: Dancing w/ The Stars, Recaps

That was cute. As always, it wasn’t the best dance of the night, but at least it looked like Kirstie was having fun and at least trying to dance well. I liked the shadow ending a lot. However, I have to ask, was she chewing gum? What the hell was that?

Carrie Ann said that was Kirstie’s best dance of the season, but there was one little mistake in the middle. Len agrees that it was her best dance. Then he makes a pun about them dancing to the Maks-imum. See what he did there? Bruno is surprisingly calm. I think he called the mistake a “caca.” Thanks for that poop reference, Bruno.

Scores:
Carrie Ann – 8.5
Len – 8.5
Bruno – 8 and a HALF! (I think my Bruno is back!)
25.5/30 Their highest score of the competition!

OK, time for a real guilty pleasure! Emmitt and Cheryl are dancing a samba to “Copacabana.” As much as Emmitt gives me very little material to work with when it comes to snark, I really enjoy watching him dance. He reminds me a bit of Kyle Massey. He moves better than anyone of his body type has a right to! A part of me wonders if this is really Emmitt’s guilty pleasure or if he and Cheryl just chose a song that would be good for a samba. 

That was just flat out fun! Sure, there were inflatable parrots, but the dance itself was pretty great. I do have to say, however, that whoever is styling the dancers’ hair must hate Cheryl. They give her the worst hairstyles (or non-styles, really) each week! Last week, she had that random braid around her forehead. This week, she just had a few French braids and the rest hanging limp. 

Len really liked the dance. That’s all he said. Bruno got maximum pleasure from that dance. Of course he did. Carrie Ann thinks that Emmitt has the “samba swagger.” She’s the only one that offers any actual critique when she says that Emmitt was off a bit in the beginning.

Scores:
Carrie Ann – 9.5
Len – 9.5
Bruno – 10
29/30 Emmitt’s highest score of the competition!

It’s time for the first team freestyle dance. Shawn/Derrek, Sabrina/Louis, Melissa/Tony, and Apolo/Karina will be dancing to “Call Me Maybe.” This is the point where we find out how Melissa got hurt. During rehearsal, she suddenly just screamed and had to be taken out on a stretcher.  

The cheer at the beginning was kind of…stupid. Also, the ladies bobbing their heads didn’t seem to sync up correctly. Aside from those two things, I actually really liked it. That says a lot considering I’ve tried the past few months to actively avoid the song “Call Me Maybe.” I’m kind of amazed that Melissa could be thrown around like that considering she was just in the hospital for a neck injury. I’m guessing it wasn’t as bad as the show made it seem. Also, can we please get a flattering costume for Sabrina? She is a really cute girl and they always make her look hideous. No, she’s not as tiny as Melissa or Karina, but she’s not that big either. Can the people in charge of costumes please give her something that fits her body type? Thanks.

Let’s go to the judges! Len called it a touchdown. That Len is so clever with his metaphors each week! Bruno thought it was hard to tell the celebrities and the professionals apart. I agree with Bruno seeing as none of the people in that group are actual celebrities. Carrie Ann tried to do the “You got spirit…” cheer and then realized that she messed it up and just ended by making noises that kind of rhymed. 

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PopePhilly

Aside from making fun of reality television on a weekly basis, PopePhilly is a legal assistant by day and avid kickball player by night (well, at least on Thursdays). On the nerd front, she is an active member of the forensic speech and debate community. She spends her time judging at tournaments throughout the country and serving on the board of directors for the West Chester University alumni chapter of Pi Kappa Delta (yes, speech nerds get to pretend to be cool by having Greek letters).

20 Comments

  1. 1
    Faye
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 11:14 am

    PopePhilly – the first time I heard of that song and the person singing it was on a DWTS results show. The performance was Britney Spears doing Gimme More at the VMA’s level bad. The singer was stiff and unanimated. I don’t have the tvgasm talent to put into words how bad it was. A train wreck stopped outside my house to watch (*is this thing on*) Yeah, that’s all I got … back to reading

  2. 2
    SaraKate
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 11:58 am

    Uck. Besides Gilles in a towel, the Gangnam Style dance was hideously horrible. It was just ugly.

  3. 3
    begonia skies
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 3:03 pm

    @PopePhilly – for the record, i’d rather watch you do a jive to “ruby soho” than watch derek and shawn dance to that damn song. i always have high hopes for guilty pleasure songs and am usually disappointed. this is your chance to pick something awesome! you can dance every other week to “i will always love you” you have way less opportunity to dance to “rump shaker!”

  4. 4
    jarthon jarthon
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 3:21 pm

    People seem to forget that on Kirstie’s first season, they had a guilty pleasures night and she danced to Britney Spears. So this is like a second guilty pleasure for her. Granted yeah that wasn’t much of one but it wasn’t her MOST guilty pleasure.

  5. 5
    begonia skies
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 3:31 pm

    to clarify…by “that damn song” i meant “my heart will go on”

  6. 6
    PopePhilly PopePhilly
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 3:54 pm

    @Faye: I’m totally going to start saying “A train wreck stopped outside my house to watch” when something is worth than a train wreck! :)

    @SaraKate: I’m still going to stand by my love (well, like, really) for the “Gangnam Style” dance. However, your disagreement is why I tend to like the freestyle dances the best. There is so much more room for objectivity.

    @begonia skies: I have a friend who is a choreographer. I’m going to see if he can put together a jive to “Ruby Soho.” That’s one of my all time favorite songs. I agree with you when it comes to “pick something awesome.” I think the only person who really got the point was Emmitt. “Copacabana” is an AMAZING song for dancing – especially the samba. I probably would have peed myself had someone danced to “Rump Shaker.” Even more so if someone would have danced to “Informer.”

    @jarthon: Thanks for the info! I didn’t watch Kirstie’s initial season. I’ve always been so on and off with this show. I either watch every single episode of a season or completely ignore it. I may have to go back and find that dance. :)

  7. 7
    Enrique's Mole
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 3:56 pm

    @Popephilly – you were in the 8th grade when Titanic came out?! Imma go get in my hoveround now and head over to bingo…

  8. 8
    PopePhilly PopePhilly
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 3:58 pm

    @Enrique’s Mole: For what it’s worth, I have a Bingo app on my phone and I play it every night before I go to sleep…usually around 9:00 p.m. I’m physically young, but I’m mentally 90 sometimes. :)

    Also, I would LOVE a Hoveround. The people in those commercials look so happy at the Grand Canyon.

  9. 9
    vallegirl vallegirl
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 8:34 pm

    Because I will defend anyone who claims Barry Manilow for their guilty pleasure, since I will still belt out “Mandy” or “Weekend in New England” like the dorkiest dork I was in grade school, Emmitt was about nine when “Copacabana” came out. I could see it being his guilty pleasure just for that reason.

    And here’s my unpopular opinion: Gilles is undeniably gorgeous but he creeps me out. He’s too intensely earnest about the whole process.

  10. 10
    Gma96793
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 8:37 pm

    My guilty pleasure is watching gangnam style group dance over and over again!!!! Loved it!!!

  11. 11
    PopePhilly PopePhilly
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 9:00 pm

    @vallegirl: I’m with ya! I had “Can’t Smile Without You” stuck in my head all last week. I can completely understand Emmitt being a kid and loving that song. When I was a little song, my favorite song was “The Gambler” by Kenny Rogers. I still smile whenever I hear that song and MamaPhilly and PapaPhilly still like to make fun of me for thinking the chorus was about “Dough in the hole.” :)

    @Gma96793: *High five.* Yes, it was a train wreck, but it was still a hell of a lot of fun. It was everything a guilty pleasure should be.

  12. 12
    Hops
    Posted October 26, 2012 at 7:28 am

    I liked Brooke’s dress, but I am a sucker for black and white stripes.

  13. 13
    Faye
    Posted October 26, 2012 at 7:44 am

    I wonder what Derek could do with one my guilty pleasures – Fight the Power (Public Enemy – Motherfu*k him and John Wayne!!!) Secret Garden (Bruce Springsteen) Aint No Call Like a Booty Call (Blackstreet) Someone Else is Steppin In (ZZ Hill) September Morning (Neil Diamond)

    As for Gilles, I would loan him my rent money knowing full well he probably wouldn’t pay me back but it would give me an excuse to go to his house everyday to ask him for my money. I better not see him naked on payday!

  14. 14
    Angela
    Posted October 26, 2012 at 7:46 am

    @vallegirl: Yes! That is what bugs me about Gilles. He is so into it that he comes off way too seriously and somewhat arrogant at times. He is undeniably a good dancer, but his approach is off-putting. I feel the same way about Melissa but my hope that Tony finally wins one of these keeps me rooting for her.

  15. 15
    Samanda
    Posted October 26, 2012 at 2:37 pm

    I tend to be a rather cranky Len-like judge for these things. I hate to see weak dancers beat out better ones due to fandom, or ‘entertainment value’ for the most part. While I like Kristie Alley, she is by far the weakest dancer, and I believe should be the next one eliminated. HOWEVER, all that went out the window for the Gangnam Style dance. I was rolling with laughter throughout, and I loved it! Kelly was right on when she said that a trainwreck is fun to watch sometimes. I was happy that the judges all gave out 9s, I thought that was fair considering.

    I know some people don’t love Shawn, but she is my favorite. I don’t like the ‘artsy’ dances nearly as much as clean choreographed and taightly executed ones, and she has amazing technical skills. She is also adorable! Some people have complained about some of the contestants having previous dance experience, and I totally get the point that not everyone starts on equal footing, but that seems like a complaint for casting. Once they are on the show I don’t think anyone should be penalized for being good at dance in a dance competition.

    You can add me to the list of those who love Gilles. He is really good, and his earnesty comes off as boyish and adorable to me. He was also a complete unknown prior to his first go on DWTS, and owes a lot of his career to his success on the show. I can understand why he loves the oppertunity so much and is so grateful to be there and perform again.

    I will also join your petition to get Sabrina in some flattering costumes. She is ‘hollywood fat’ but actually pretty good looking. Some of her outfits have been so bad that is really took away from her performance, because I was too distracted by her jiggling all over the place and waiting for a boob to come flying out.

  16. 16
    Prairie Dawn
    Posted October 27, 2012 at 10:54 pm

    I’ve been a lurker her for a while and just thought I’d mention Giles shows full frontal in the Sex and the City movie.

  17. 17
    PopePhilly PopePhilly
    Posted October 28, 2012 at 11:44 am

    @Hops: I like black and white stripes too (I dress mainly in black and white and a bit of red from time to time). It was just a terrible choice for a formal gown (IMO). :)

    @Faye: Best. Plan. EVER!

    @Samanda: I don’t think those witch dance experience should be penalized. I agree that it’s more of a casting issue – they really should have some kind of rule about the contestants and how much experience they can have prior to the show.

    @Prairie Dawn: (Love the name, btw!) Thanks for finally breaking your silence to share that bit of information. I suddenly appreciate “Sex and the City” more than I ever did. Happy lurking – hope you join the conversation again! :)

  18. 18
    Samanda
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 3:27 am

    I know I just posted about how much I like Shawn, but someone has seriously got to stop her from doing that horrible squat move. She did a weird squat and handshake with Derek this week, and last week she did a squat and slap your knees move. It looks terrible squating like that in a skirt, and it doesn’t show any technical merrit either. I don’t know why they keep doing that, but it seriously needs to stop.

  19. 19
    Leto
    Posted October 29, 2012 at 9:17 am

    So, PopePhilly. I said I’d come read your recaps, but as I don’t watch the show, I understand nothing. So I tried and watch the first episode… And OMG. First this show is very long. Second, I love dancing (at home where nobody can see me :p) but watching other people dance bores me to no end. And third… I don’t know who half the stars coming on this show are x). This is just a shame.

    I want your email, girl.

  20. 20
    wcsdancer
    Posted October 30, 2012 at 9:25 am

    @Samanda, I have to disagree a little about Shawn. While I do like her, and she is adorable, she does not *dance*. She performs choreography and she does it really well. But she has zero musicality. I can appreciate that you don’t care for the “artsy” dances, but for me, something is a bit off when the person has no connection to the music.

    I’m also a Gilles fan. I like that he’s trying so hard.

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