Still, we don’t get to see Allison Williams naked. She must have an ironclad no nudity clause in her contract because there wasn’t even side boob. There was no boob. Only Lonely Island ass, which no one wants or needs to see.
When Hannah returns to her building, she knocks on Laird’s door and he lets her in to his dim apartment. Hannah skirts the issue by making small talk about having passed Laird in the halls but never saying hello. Laird knows all about Hannah and Marnie, though, and is glad she made the first step. Laird, a short-statured man with a full beard and a knit wool cap, informs Hannah that he is now clean but he will help her out because he always pointed to do something for her.
Hannah wants to make it clear that she isn’t judging Laird, because she understands sometimes it takes whatever it takes to get through life.
Note to self: hang out in the mailroom of my apartment building and get to know the neighbors. Maybe one day one of them will want to buy you drugs. Maybe this is how apartment buildings in NY and LA differ, because the only person who was hanging out by our mailboxes was apparently stealing people’s mail and, eventually, their identities. All things being equal, I’d rather hang out with a drug addict or, ideally, a neighbor who binges on Sauvignon Blanc.
Back in her apartment, Hannah informs Elijah of her plans to go on a coke binge and write an article about her experiences. She wants to know if it is too early to start at 4pm, as she doesn’t know the rules about binges. Elijah informs her that the only rule that applies here is basic human decency, but this doesn’t faze Hannah. He is more interested in knowing what Hannah will be wearing during said binge, to which she replies she will be wearing the outfit she wore earlier to the JazzHate offices. Elijah objects and rummages through her clothes. He hands her a tiny top and shorts and says the outfit “is inspired by a girl I went to middle school with, who fucked her uncle and her stepfather. It’s called power clashing”. Oh, Elijah, you will be missed.
Beware- your stepdad will want to bang you if you wear this
It becomes clear after Hannah has changed clothes that the binge has officially commenced, as Hannah and Elijah frantically relate all of the things they want to accomplish in life, but have yet to do. Among such lofty goals, she wants to get married in a veil even though she claims to be against the industrial marriage complex, and she wants to learn how to properly write a check because she often confuses where the date and the amount go- the sort of stream of consciousness rambling that often follows ingesting large amounts of drugs (I’ve heard). Elijah suggests they write all of this down, as Hannah is frustrated that she is a writer and she isn’t cataloguing any of this winning material.