Grey’s Anatomy: Only Mamma Can Judge

This week on Grey’s Anatomy, the role of the overprotective mother is being played by Bailey. As she watches over Jackson, our sweet dying patient from last week, Arizona comes rushing down the hall. This is a 911 page at 2AM Arizona, stop running and start skating. Arizona makes up for her lack of skate use by being on full alert and ready to hear the cause of Bailey’s 911 page. Bailey updates that Jackson’s blood pressure is up slightly and maybe just maybe this will push him higher on the transplant list.

Frustrated, Arizona reminds Bailey that despite her perky nature she doesn’t want to be woken up at 2AM to chat with Bailey about her patient, unless there is an actual emergency. BTW Bailey, how are your marital problems going? Your husband doesn’t still complain that you obsess over work and that you spend more time with your patients than your family, does he? Just curious.

Derek is also burning the midnight oil checking in on our favorite wise-cracking inmate. The inmate protests that he requested Dr. Shepherd not be awoken from his beauty sleep but the inmate has developed brain contusions that are getting worse. As Derek reviews his charts, the prisoner begins to realize that his brain troubles will shortly kill him. This can be prevented if they get him into surgery immediately but the prisoner, who will be killed by the state in five days, refuses the surgery. He’d rather die at the hands of Dr. Shepherd.

I understand Derek getting pissed by the way the prisoner is presenting his case. Basically he wants Derek to feel like a piece of shit for letting him die. But I kind of agree with him. He is going to die anyways, why waste tax dollars on a super expensive surgery just to keep him alive, just to kill him. My bad, it’s that pesky logic again….you have no place in Grey’s Anatomy logic, get out of here and go justify the on goings of lost. (TOMORROW! YAY)

At the fraternity house, all the members and pledges are wide awake and we even have a shacker trying to do his walk of shame without being noticed. Sloan is hiding in Lexie’s room (the attic) desperately trying to make his exit, but the house is still rockin’. Derek’s mother is descending on Seattle and the whole house is on full alert to make it look less like a Sig Ep house and more like a Tri-Delt house. Sloan, thankful to have brought his own Metamucil, doesn’t understand how these kids stay up all night.

The fact that he might not be able to grab some zzz’s and spend time in the tanning bed is all secondary to the news that Mother McDreamy is coming to town. Since she was a second mother to him, she will be beyond disappointed to learn that he is tasting the very young and very forbidden fruit that is Little Grey. Um, if she could get over you sleeping with her daughter-in-law, I’m sure she can handle a 24 year old. As a side note, can a 24 year old really perform surgery on you? WTF? I couldn’t even rent a car at 24 because I didn’t have a credit card.

Downstairs, at 4AM, Meredith is clinging to a bottle of tequila terrified about the upcoming arrival of Mommy McDreamy. Turns out moms don’t usually love ‘Deth,’ which I for one am shocked by. I mean, she’s always so positive and bubbly and never tries to drown herself or talk about make-believe issues! But as the good friend she is, Izzie is on the case. Izzie is in her element as she bustles around like a 1950′s house wife to make the home look presentable. She has hidden the condoms, tequila, dirty magazines, sex toys, bondage units, the kid from desperate housewives locked in the basement and her botox punch card. After that many surgeries the 10th one is free. Izzie’s overall advice, act like me and you’ll be fine. My advice, leave out the sex with ghosts part.

As Izzie and the gang continue giving Meredith advice, Sloan quietly sneaks out the door only to run into Derek. Sloan makes up a lie about wanting to have a drink at 4AM then hightails it out of there. Glad to see that none of the Doctors sleep during the night. Hopefully they only will have experimental surgeries the next day, so if they fail…hey it was only an experiment, what’d ya expect?

The next morning at the hospital Izzie is giving Grey last minute advice, including a hair critique. After a mini-Izzie makeover, Grey is sporting a high ponytail adorned with a hot pink scrunchee. Looks ridiculous, but Izzie is right. I once sported a hot pink scrunchee and mom’s loved me. Granted I was seven. Christina walks down the hall to see the new and improved Meredith, gives her one wtf face, and keeps walking.

Grey, Shepherd and Yang update inmate Dunn on his condition. He is still approaching death’s door, and despite his wishes, once he goes unconscious the Doctors can make the decisions for him and bring him into surgery. He again argues this point and makes the valid argument of would you fix a TV before throwing it away? No, let him die! I see Shepherd’s point about him cheating the system, but give me a break, I still stand by not making tax payers pay for massive medical bills for a person who doesn’t want it, and is going to die 4 days later.

We then meet Calle’s patient. I’ve done this once before, and I’m going to do it again. Calle’s patient has nothing to do with the rest of the storyline and is seriously revolting, so I’m going to recap the whole thing here. Calle has a patient who grew up his whole life short. It ruined his entire life as he has obsessed over his insecurities about it, and struggled with having a taller brother. This insecurity led him to have a controversial surgery in Thailand and basically f-ed himself. Now his legs have this disgusting fungus growing out of it and he can’t walk. When I say disgusting….I have to stress that, that is an understatement of a lifetime. I literally gagged for about 3 minutes after they showed it.

So, when they perform the surgery to fix him, he loses another inch making him even shorter. This news devastates the man since now he can’t rent go-carts at celebration station anymore. He and his brother fight about this because the brother has also had to live his life tip toeing around shorty’s insecurities. They relate this-kinda-back to the overall story as Calle can relate to shorty’s sadness as she too feels like she has been knocked down a few inches metaphorically by her issues over the last few seasons. She said that she used to walk tall within the hospital, but how tall could you actually be walking when you were homeless living in the hospital basement, but really we found out you were a secret millionaire? Whatever, moving on.

The team updates Jackson’s mom on the status of his transplant. While they are updating her, Sadie jumps in with encouraging news for the mom saying that he should be an easy match. This, isn’t exactly true though as Bailey quickly corrects her while simultaneously shooting Sadie an “I hope you die look.” When the mom leaves, Bailey attaches a very tight leash on Sadie telling her that unless she raises her hand before speaking, she better keep her aussie trap shut. Don’t be too concerned Sadie, per last week Bailey hates all newbies.

Grey wheels prisoner Dunn down the hall and he tries to convince her to not be mad at him for killing all those women. He makes up a story of his childhood asking Grey if a history of violence would redeem him in her eyes. Are you really having an ethical discussion with a woman who has a pink scrunchee holding up a disturbingly high ponytail? They run into Jackson and Bailey, and Jackson and Dunn have the highly promoted scene where Dunn offers Jackson his organs.

And finally we are introduced to the much hyped Mamma McDreamy who is none other than Tyne Daly! We learn immediately that Mamma bear is a no-nonsense, salt of the earth type gal. And that’s just from her haircut. Suddenly the pink scrunchee doesn’t seem like such a good call. As Mamm and Derek catch up, Mary Sunshine herself approaches with a shiny and thoroughly awkward smile on her face. The smile turns to terror when Mamma D lets her know they are eating lunch together and she hopes Meredith likes it ‘grilled.’ Meredith is a bit overdramatic. She’s all peaches and cream with a guy who killed five women, but she’s afraid of Tyne Daly?

As Izzie and Yang watch this conversation Yang wonders why Meredith is doing the pee pee dance. Turns out Izzie made her hydrate before meeting the mom. Are they running a race together? Their discussion is interrupted by the Major who mid hospital check up, casually asks Yang out on a date. Izzie looks like a 7th grader who just intercepted a check yes-or-no note in 4th period by this convo. Yang is flustered but accepts the date and the Major heads out. Izzie then giggles like a drunk 7th grader who intercepted a check yes-or-no note in 4th period.

In his room, Jackson asks Bailey why he can’t have the nice ginger’s organs. Obviously he’s never watched South Park. Bailey explains, that a transfer like that would be highly against the rules, which just upped the percentage that this exchange will happen at Seattle Grace 45%.

A similar conversation is occurring between Meredith and prisoner Dunn, as he tries to figure out why he can’t give the little one his organs. He refers to himself as a 3-day liquidation sale in which everything must go. He ends his plea by saying he wants to save a life before he goes.

Bailey finds Arizona to discuss option for speeding up Jackson’s treatment. The two of them disagree again, and begin to yell at each other. I’m kinda digging Arizona. She’s perky yet bitchy at the same time. While they fight, Karev interrupts to let them know that they have organs for Jackson! Don’t people usually wait months/weeks for that? Apparently the organ transplant list is on Jack Bauer time today.

Karev and Arizona jump on a private plane to go recover the organs. Arizona keeps trying to make small talk with Karev about flying, Izzie, children, the future. Karev basically tells her to shut it and leave him alone. Why is everyone hating on Arizona? I like her!

At lunchtime Izzie gushes to Yang about her upcoming date. Izzie thinks that Yang will be cute with the “pig murderer.” Gross, forgot about that. Izzie, on a high from all of her relationship help today, gives Yang some dating tips about what to do, say and wear. While they discuss Yang’s future (disaster) date, they notice Meredith across the cafeteria sitting like she has a rod up her ass eating pot roast. Yang informs them that Meredith is in the middle of a show for mommy which she is totally blowing. Apparently mom’s only like girlfriends who eat heavy starch and carbs at lunch.

At the table of discomfort, Mamma D questions Meredith kindly about her past. When she asks about Mer’s parents, Meredith turns into Bridget Jones and squintly fumbles over words and excuses herself to go check on the serial killer. Smooth, Grey. Derek lets his mom know that Meredith is a little uncomfortable talking about her parents. Mamma D, let’s Baby D know that she understands how hard this is for him to treat a murderer based on his father’s death. I’m glad she mentioned it since Meredith was barely fazed by this news last week.

At another table, Sloan is joined by Lexie, which is the equivalent of a high school student sitting in the teacher’s lounge. Sloan freaks, but Lexie informs him that if he wants to keep banging her, he’s gotta share her snack pack at lunch. The other interns see this and think Dr. Sloan is totally the coolest and all join him. The interns start acting like 12 year olds trading food and talking about Miley Cyrus, forcing Sloan for the second time this episode to recognize what a dirty old man he is.

He leaves the kiddie table and finds someone his own age to talk to, Mamma D. She recognizes that he has been avoiding her all day and Sloan puts his tail between his legs and admits he’s sleeping with someone he shouldn’t. Mamma freaks out thinking Sloan is referring to Meredith and can’t believe Sloan is banging Derek’s girl again. Sloan quickly vomits in his mouth and corrects her that it’s not Meredith, but Mer’s sister. Mer’s much younger sister. When he points her out to Mamma D, Lexie is appropriately slurping a box of apple juice.

Not to split hairs, but wouldn’t Lexie be the same age that Meredith was when her and Derek started dating? Why is this age thing such a big drama? And why, all of a sudden are the interns acting like toddlers? It’d be more effective and believable to make Sloan look more like a dirty old man.

Moving on, Jackson is anxiously awaiting his new organs. He and his mom are both excited about being able to move out of the hospital. Karev and Arizona arrive at the other hospital where the organs are coming from and learn that the organs are coming from another dying child. You couldn’t just let us enjoy Jackson being saved, could ya Grey’s Anatomy!

While they are picking up the organs, prisoner Dunn makes his final plea to be the donor. He knows he is circling the drain, at that the only softie who is going to show him any sympathy is Grey and her ponytail. Grey lets him know that they found organs for the little boy, and oh yeah, by the way, you were a match for him. I’m sure that won’t come into play later at all.

Mamma D, who like the rest of us, finds Sloan’s romantic story much more interesting than her own son’s, tracks down Lexie. She asks her a few times if she is a good girl, and questions how many sexual partners she’s had. Mamma might want to clarify, do you mean the actual number or the number we tell guys? Once she is satisfied by Lexie’s answers she leaves her be.

Back high above the madness, Karev and Arizona returning to Seattle Grace. Arizona begins to discuss V-day ideas for Alex to give Izzie. She mentions jewelry, but considering all Karev did for Izzie’s bday was bake a crappy cake, I’m guessing the only jewelry he’s giving out came from a machine at the bowling alley. Karev lashes out on Arizona, not understanding how she can be so cavalier considering they just witnessed a child die. Arizona soberly tells him that she understands the repercussions of what taking those organs are, and that she has to focus on the good times or the little coffins and dying children will take over her life.

As they conduct the surgery on Jackson, Sadie raises her hand and whispers repeatedly “call all me.” She finally shouts, “Call on me!” And points out a spot on Jackson’s new organs. At the same time, prisoner Dunn begins to crash and begs to not be saved. Once he goes unconscious the doctors step in to action to put him into surgery. When Meredith doesn’t sign the release form agreeing to his surgery, Derek yells at her and invites Yang to scrub in on the surgery.

Bailey frantically tries to save Jackson, but the organs are dead and they have to remove them. They can keep him stable for 24 hours, but if they don’t get new organs within that time frame, he’ll die. If ONLY there was someone dying in a next OR with matching organs. If only….Meanwhile, in prisoner Dunn’s OR they are saving his live, despite the fact that he’s dying in 5 days and asked to be let go.

Post surgery, Yang follows up with Meredith in what I assume is a burying the hatchet moment. But really all she says is that the ponytail looks fug and walks out. Meredith finally pulls her hair down, letting the ’80′s rest peacefully. Mamma D finds Sloan and gives her seal of approval on Lexie and tells him to stop having such low expectations of himself. She also says that his maturity level is so much younger than Lexie’s, that the age difference really doesn’t matter.

Not quite done meddling, Mamma D pulls the Major aside to talk about his post war experience. As an Army nurse for 25 years she knows how difficult it can be to sleep after war and recommends vitamins. The Major dismisses her claim and says he sleeps fine, but he is clearly agitated by the conversation.

Prisoner Dunn wakes up to find that he is still alive and complains about the fact that he is still on this Earth. He once again compares Derek and himself saying that Derek chooses who lives or dies every day. This conversation infuriates Derek, and he lets prisoner Dunn know that he is too good to die in the hospital and vows that he will do everything to make sure Dunn dies at the hand of the state not at his hand.

As the day comes to a close, and Meredith has been able to convince Mamma D that she is a likable person all day, she tracks Mamma bear down and spills the beans. She lets her know that she isn’t rainbows and pink scrunchees, that usually she is frown lines barely concealed by too much botox and letting herself drown. She also is the kind of person who feels sorry for serial killers and understands why mommy’s don’t usually like her. No better proof of that than her own mom. Mamma D takes this all in, and politely excuses herself. Izzie overhears this conversation and looks on as if to say, did you teach you nothing??

Izzie then follows up with Denny on how she wants to meet his mom. She wants to go on a date with him and overall she wants him alive. Denny asks if this is a break up speech and she answers that it is. Thank God.

In romantic news, Sloan leaves with Lexie no longer ashamed by their relationship. He also urges Calle to get herself out there and take a chance on love! (isn’t this the exact same way these three ended last episode?) On date night, the Major shows up at Yang’s house very late, super hammered, and randomly in a suit. The Major explains that he hasn’t been on a date in so long that he needed to take the edge off. Plus he remembered that the date was with Yang making him really need to take the edge off. Yang is pissed and tells him he reeks like a brewery and needs to shower ASAP. The Major complies and heads straight for her shower. Atta boy Major!

And it’s time to say farewell to Mamma D. Her and Derek discuss Meredith and Mamma D gives Derek a diamond ring. Wh Wh What?? She tells him that the ring was meant for Derek when he found the right girl. Sad, since Derek has been married before, but shocking that Mamma didn’t think Addison was right but Meredith is? Mamma finds Meredith’s sympathy for a death row inmate endearing not scary and says that she’s the one.

The Major beckons Yang into the bathroom where he is still fully clothed. Everything, suit, tie, shoes. Yang is like, WTF you’re wearing shoes in my shower….and you are taking a shower at my house. This is the worst date ever. The drunken sailor shares a story of his best surgery with Yang. The surgery is one of I’m sure many traumatic stories that keep the Major up at night, revealing his troubled psyche. Yang’s icy exterior melts towards the Major and she joins him in the shower. As Yang comforts him, the Major looks completely defeated. It’s tough work keeping those walls around you firm!

At the frat house, Alex finds Izzie and tells her he wants to introduce her to Mamma Karev. The only thing that could make Izzie happier is if he said he wanted a ghost threesome. She leaves to go get a bottle of tequila to celebrate. When she leaves, Denny approaches and sits next to Alex. He seriously tells Alex, “We have to talk.” I swear I literally held my breath in this scene, because I was so afraid Alex was going to say something back to Denny and we were going to learn that he had been seeing Denny all along too. Luckily, I was wrong. But I can’t help but wonder what Denny has to tell Alex. He has a ghost STD? He’s knocked Izzie up with a fake baby? Only time will tell.

Still at the hospital, Meredith finds Bailey talking to Jackson. She apologizes to Bailey for Jackson’s situation, and as Bailey walks away, and the serious music begins, you know Meredith has something up her sleeve. She follows up with prisoner Dunn and lets him know his latest prognosis. She tells him that his skull is basically non-existent and that he has to be very careful, because if he damages it, he’ll suffer brain death, and die. She makes sure that Dunn fully comprehends what she is saying, and leaves.

When she does, Dunn begins to pound his head against the metal bed over and over again, like a person who just woke up next to George after a long night of vodka shots.

And there you have it! Last week’s recap got kind of lost in the TVGasm update, but to let you know, I was pretty down on Grey’s after last week’s episode. I thought it was a snooze fest at best. But I thought this week was good, and set up a great episode for this Thursday. Am I wrong, or did my rain cloud just dissipate?

When it’s better I wish it lasted longer, when it sucks it feels like forever…That’sWhatSheSaid.