Grey’s Anatomy: The Gang’s All Here

This week on Grey’s Anatomy, the show starts out with a serious tone as Addison Montgomery makes her way back to Seattle Grace. When the ambulance arrives The Chief and Derek meet it with hugs for Addison and the woman she’s with. They wheel in Addy’s brother as Addison tells Derek that he was fine earlier but then something just went terribly wrong. So did they take an ambulance all the way to Seattle from LA? Or does this guy live in Seattle? Or am I thinking logic way too early into this explosive crossover event?

At the frat house, Izzie is up late with a table full of crafts. She has out the glue, glitter and uncooked macaroni and is drawing spirals on construction paper. Alex asks her if her late night craft session is a dead fiancé therapy session. Izzie, after giving Alex a look that says NOW you ask about the dead fiancé stuff, informs him that she’s worried about the broken interns. They’ve had a rough run, and she is ready to put back on her Suzy Sunshine cape and fix them. She doesn’t think they are losers, she just wants them to have some non-self mutilating fun.

Addison and her friend tell McD and the Chief that bro has a parasite that he thinks he got from eating unwashed food in Mexico. I can relate. I’ve definitely felt like I had a parasite after some of the things I’ve put in my mouth in Mexico. (That’sWhatSheSaid). Derek and Addy discuss confusing medical mumbo jumbo that I didn’t follow, but to top line they are already disagreeing on how to treat her brother. While they are arguing he begins to go into cardiac arrest.

Morning comes at Seattle Grace and all the interns are wide-eyed and bush..well, they are there. I agree with Karev, besides Super Lex, these interns are bottom of the barrel. The interns ask about the patient with “worms in his brain” excitedly. When none of the interns know the medical term for that, the Chief turns them over to Izzie for the day relieved no doubt to not have to deal with them. Izzie passes out decorative construction paper and prepares them for the game they are about to play. The interns are not thrilled about the games, but these were the same group of interns trading food at lunch and drinking out of juice boxes, oh and cutting each other open. These interns are lucky they are even allowed to use the bathroom in this hospital, let alone play games.

Bailey is assigned to Addy and company so the Chief hands out the resident’s assignments. Grey is surprised to hear that Addison is in the hospital. It seems a little weird to me that her boyfriend-who she lives with-has his ex-wife in the hospital and she was the last to know. Bailey finds Addison and meets Naomi, Addison’s friend. After introductions Derek gives an update on Archer’s (Ad’s brother) condition. He’s stable, but we also learn that he carries a massive hatred for McD and is dating Naomi. Derek is surprised and annoyed that Naomi is dating him, looks like the hatred is mutual.

Naomi and Derek catch up briefly, and Naomi sadly says that she thought that Addy and McD would last forever. After the love song that he wrote and sang for their wedding, she thought they would live happily ever after. She also thought her and her husband would last forever, and Derek and her ex-husband’s friendship would last forever… Derek seems annoyed by the whole conversation and leaves. Did anyone else wonder how many times Naomi has watched the “Friends Forever,” Saved by the Bell episode. “Always will be friends!”

The married/pregnant couple from last week is being checked up on by Torres, when they are interrupted by Karev. He tells the woman, that her brain aneurism removal surgery is temporarily on hold, now that the brain parasites are in the house. The couple, learning that the brain ticking time bomb is going to keep ticking in her head, are less than pleased.

The Chief and Yang are talking to the mysterious blond who stopped the Major in his tracks last week. Her father is the patient being treated and it’s Bernard!! (At least we know where he and Rose have been this whole season) The blond daughter dotes on her father as she tries to determine what’s wrong with her. He asks her to leave for a bit and she says he’s as stubborn as her second graders. Once she leaves, Bernard tells the doctors that he has cancer, but his daughter doesn’t know. As he’s describing his treatments, the Major walks in. Bernard looks scathingly at the Major and basically calls him a pussy for waiting until the daughter left instead of facing her like a man.

The Major avoids this conversation by telling Bernard that his daughter has the right to know about his cancer. Even though she’s an adult who still calls her father “daddy” she isn’t a bad person. Bernard is basically like, uh as much as I LOVE getting advice from the guy who walked out on my daughter the day before their wedding and broke up with her over email….you can pretty much can it. This conversation is only more awkward by the fact that Yang is listening to the entire conversation.

Just in case the awkward conversation quotient isn’t high enough, we are then treated to the world’s most awkward situation. Grey is checking up on Archer, while Naomi (who I’m finding increasingly more obnoxious) sings the song that Derek wrote for Addison for their wedding day. The song talks about cadavers and scalpels, which makes it all the more shocking that after such intense passion Addison ended up in Sloan’s bed. Sloan joins them and finally notices the elephant in the room that is McD’s girlfriend. Grey tells them it’s fine and that she’s planning on uploading the instant classic onto her ipod as soon as she gets home.

McD interrupts the jam session to give Archer’s wormy brain update. Turns out the worms have multiplied and there are now eight, where there used to be one. Surgery isn’t possible for Archer, and without saying so….all the doctors in the room know this means he is going to die.

The intern Day’O'Fun is in full swing with Izzie and a room full of dummies. Oh, and there are mannequins for the interns to work on. The first game consists of the interns getting a surgery and racing to see who can dress their mannequin first. The interns get their assignments and their off! Everyone frantically rushes to dress their mannequin with the exception of Sadie, who looks like her card was written in Japanese. Izzie runs around cheerleading the interns on, reminding them how fun this is. Brown-noser Lexie is not surprisingly the first to finish. When Sadie sees that Lexie is finished and correct, she throws the drape over her patient and calls finished! George looks at her patient and in so many words says that unless her patient is heading to the dentist, she is dead wrong.

Addison finds McD in the brain viewing room and starts a very well rehearsed speech. She tells him that she keeps him in a very small box, one which she thinks is petty and inconsequential and that even though it has very nice hair, she thinks about the box as little as possible. But now she needs him to come out of the box, and be the medical God she once knew him to be. She needs him to save her brother, and she 100% believes he can. McD begins to tear up a little and you can tell the Hero complex will be kicking in very shortly.

At the front desk, the Grey’s Anatomy hotness significantly rises as Bailey hears someone asking about the Montgomery patient and it’s none other than Taye Diggs. Rawr. Bailey asks about his connection to “the crew” since Addison is Shepherd’s ex wife, Archer is Addison’s brother, Naomi is Addison’s best friend and Archer’s girlfriend who is divorced from Derek’s old best friend whom he doesn’t speak to anymore. And, they are all doctors. And Taye Diggs is door #4! Ex- husband to Naomi and ex-best friend to Derek. Everybody got that?

Bailey is surprised that the ex-husband has come all the way from LA to check up on the new boyfriend being treated by his ex-brother in law who is his ex-best friend. Taye (Sam) isn’t sure why he is here either, but I’m guessing it is to remind non Private Practice viewers like me, that you can tune-in every Thursday at 10/9c to see the obscene hotness that is Taye Diggs. Before Sam leaves to check on Archer, Bailey warns him that things aren’t looking good, other than his gorgeous smile and fine ass. Ok, I’ve made my point and will move on.

Yang and Mer walk down the hall and play “who’s relationship is more f-ed up today.” Meredith goes first by saying my boyfriend’s ex-wife is in the hospital with her brother, who I didn’t even know existed, and apparently my boyfriend writes songs and plays them in public like a total tool. Yang counters by saying that her boyfriend-ish’s ex-fiance is in the hospital, who Yang did not know existed, and that he broke up with via email. Grey asks what is wrong with the girl and Yang gets a LOL from me by saying nothing other than the fact that she calls her dad, daddy. I’m right on par with you on that, Yang.

Lexie continues to rock in the intern game, and the next part of her challenge is to diagnose Dr. Sloan. He starts to tell her his symptoms include a rising heart rate and a hardening…..but she quickly stops him to say that if he won’t talk dirty to her in front of others he can’t do it privately, unless they are playing guitar hero. As Lexie completes her assignment with Sloan, Sadie secretly listens on to Lexie’s answer. George catches Sadie cheating and gives her a new assignment. What is going on with Sadie? Is she really bad at games…or a moron?

The Major finds Yang to ‘splain himself. Yang only wants to discuss the patient, and has no interest in talking about anything else. She walks away from him when he persists and runs into the ex-fiancé who looks like she borrowed her outfit from one of her second graders. She looks up to see Owen and is absolutely floored. She thought he was still in Iraq and has been terrified and praying for him for months. She saw his mom just a few days ago, and she thinks he’s still in Iraq too. Her confusion changes to relief and joy as she hugs him, thrilled he is home. The major doesn’t return her embrace, removes her arms and walks away. The only person’s face who appears more shocked than the ex fiancé is Yang’s, who witness the whole thing.

Addison has taken up shop in the least used room at Seattle Grace, the chapel. She is trying to pray, but doesn’t know how to because she only goes to church on Christmas and hasn’t built up any clout with the big man upstairs. Torres joins her, and without saying anything begins to pray aloud for guidance with what to do about kissing the pediatric surgeon. Addison listens on, not sure if she’s more shocked by the woman thing, or the pediatric surgeon thing. When Torres finishes, she reminds Addison that she saves babies every day, and that hasn’t gone unnoticed from whoever may be listening up above. But maybe she should ask for forgiveness for the whole, though shalt not commit adultery mishap.

Sam and Derek meet for the hottest bromance of the season with a hug that I would love to slip in the middle of. They do the quick update, “I got an earring,” “I banged the intern,” “we’re both about to buy red sports cars” catch up, then Sam tells Derek the serious news. Addison is praying. She needs a miracle and even though Derek reiterates that a miracle isn’t possible, Sam wants him to look a little harder.

And back in the horse race, Sadie is checking up on the pregnant woman with all the residents watching. She tries to check the babies heart beat, and fearfully says she can’t hear it. Well that’s a super thing to tell the woman with a brain aneurism whose heart rate keeps reaching alarming levels. Karev comes in and tells her if she keeps the heart monitor on the baby’s ass, she’ll never hear anything except maybe some baby gas. Izzie, the internal optimist gives Sadie an A for effort and I give her a G for Get the F out of the hospital Sadie, you bring nothing to any story line they try to give you.

The Major tries one last time to reason with Yang that he isn’t a total asshole, even though he broke up with his fiancé via email. I mean, it’s not like he texted her! Yang asks if the Major’s mamma knows he is in town. His silence is telling. Although, you’d think after dealing with Mamma Burke, Yang would embrace someone whose mom isn’t in the picture.

McD finds Archer/Addision and company and is ready to take on the experimental and controversial surgery. Shocking. Archer, whose loathe for McD is palpable challenges that McD can’t do it. McD calls him a coward and even calls his profession cowardice. The neurologists rely on people like McD to either fix the problems they can’t, or assume the responsibility when the case is hopeless. McD is up to the surgery and challenges Archer to see if he is.

After winning the sword fight, they begin the surgery. During his surgery, Bailey fills out forms to switch to pediatric surgery and gets crap from everyone around her. I guess to work with children you have to smile a lot, and nobody thinks she can cut it. Hey, just because she doesn’t love her own child doesn’t mean she won’t love others! Addison waits for Derek to say his opening surgery line and when he does, she makes a longing face that fully says, how in the hell did I let you get away.

The Major meets with Bernard to tell him he has to update his daughter on his actual condition. Bernard argues that she is a Sunshine girl, and couldn’t handle this type of news. She freaks when her students get a cold. I’m guessing she also went home every weekend in college to get the house keeper to do her laundry for her. While they are arguing this, Bernard begins to spit up blood. The daughter freaks, but the Major wusses out by saying everything will be ok and wheels Bernard into surgery. I don’t blame him, I wouldn’t want to be the one to pee in this girl’s bed of roses either.

McD is performing Archer’s surgery, which we get a good look at. The surgery consists of Derek removing circular cysts with an internal crane machine. When he brings the cyst out, they suck it dry and it turns into a fiery looking ball that becomes a flash of light then turns into a worm in the Petri dish. I’m not even kidding about that description. And then he goes in for the next one. That’s it? Buster Bluthe should have been a brain surgeon if that’s all it takes! He rocked the crane machine.

In a quick check up of patients not related to Addison, the pregnant woman is getting increasingly antsy and terrified about her brain surgery. She doesn’t understand a hospital where she has to wait. And in Bernard’s surgery, they find another tumor and the Chief insists that now they will have to tell the daughter. The Major tells them that after her mom died, her dad kept her completely sheltered so she wouldn’t feel anymore pain, but Yang argues that she deserves to know what she is dealing with for the future. Anyone else sense double meaning behind that?

In Archer’s head, McD busts the last cyst and accidentally releases the worm into the brain. McD isn’t ready to bring in the crash cart, he wants to find the worm. Watch out for guys at the bar who always want the worm. He has two minutes to track down the worm or its game over. Addison and Naomi watch terrified from above as God-like McD gets the worm, pulls it out, watches it turn to gold and finishes successfully.

After a successful day of games, The Chief, Karev, Izzie and George wait for the winner. Izzie asks for a prize from the Chief as the interns round the corner. In a race to the finish, Lexie ends up winning. The chief tells Lexie that her prize is to scrub in with Shepherd and hold the doomsday sucker. Nothing Meredith hasn’t done for McD I’m sure. Lexie is stoked about her prize.

After Bernard’s surgery, the Major starts telling the daughter about his prognosis. As he’s talking, she interrupts him to say how much he’s changed. He doesn’t even look like he used to, he looks hard….like someone who wouldn’t even take their clothes off when they shower. The Major does not want to talk about this, and keeps trying to tell her about her father. She demands an explanation for the two line email and instead of answering, the Major says that her father has cancer and he leaves. All of a sudden the two line break up doesn’t seem so bad.

In round two of “whose relationship is more F-ed up” between Grey and Yang, Grey looks at Derek interacting with all of his friends and feels like he had this whole other life before her. She seems very surprised that her divorced 40-something boyfriend had this whole life and other friends and other world, before he picked up everything and moved across the country. Yang simply says she doesn’t know Owen and walks away, because she is the obvious winner in this round.

After a long day of intern games, George tracks down Sadie to discuss her performance. He noticed that she was incapable to complete any of the tasks throughout the day, even though they are all the basics of medicine. He warns her that people will rely on her to know what she says she does, and that people’s lives could potentially be at stake. It’s a little disturbing one, that someone is just now noticing she is incompetent, and that 2 she was planning on removing Lexie’s appendix. What was she going to do? Cut into Lexie and guess? Sadie is indignant and denies it.

The Major pulls Yang aside for the last time to explain himself. He can’t drive the six miles to see his mom, because if she saw him, or if anyone he used to know saw him, they’d see how destroyed he is by war. He isn’t the same man anymore, and all you have to do is look at him to see that. The only time he feels like a man is when he’s with Yang. Mainly because she emasculates all men. This scene is accompanied by a dramatic indie song that I’m sure will be an Itunes top 10 by the end of the month, and I’m totally back on par with this relationship. I knew it was just the music. These two are intense and I dig it! Imagine when they finally do have sex. The emotional four play is hotter than porn.

McD finally goes to his forgotten pregnant patient and apologizes for the missed surgery. He promises to remove the aneurism in the morning, but that just isn’t good enough. She tells him she just can’t wait, and very kindly and sweetly asks for the surgery today. McD, who never met a botoxed face he didn’t love, caves in and says yes.

Sloan congratulates Lexie for her stunning victory in the 2009 intern games. As they professionally flirt, Addison notices them talking. She walks over to meet the new vixen in Sloan’s life and imagine her surprise when she hears the surname “Grey.”

Derek joins the conversation and tells Lexie to get ready to hold the doomsday sucker. Pull you zipper back up Sloan, he’s talking surgery. They are doing it tonight. When she leaves, Addison, who can’t stop laughing, is about to ask Derek about Sloan dating little Grey. Sloan jumps in and tells Addison that Derek is proposing to Meredith. Addison’s stunned silence gives Derek time to rush away.

Karev finds Izzie and is very concerned about her. After the intern games, he knows something is going on with her and wants to know what it is. Izzie repeats that she is fine, but the ominous music proves that Karev doesn’t believe her. This confuses me, because this intern ridiculousness actually seems like the most “Izzie” thing she has done in months.

George, never one to miss out on a Chief ass kissing opportunity, tells him about Sadie’s lack of knowledge of anything medical. After their meeting, Grey is waiting for Sadie. Sadie admits that she cheated to get into the program and figured that if she was in the same place as Grey she’d learn on her feet. Grey reminds Sadie that they aren’t 25 anymore and that at some point you have to grow up. Sadie can’t believe that Grey won’t pick up and move back to Europe with her and have fun, and tells Grey that they sucked the life right out of her-well her face at least. Who cheats their way into becoming a doctor? A lot of jobs, fine, but a doctor??

This Sadie thing is weird. They really never developed her character at all. They didn’t develop her relationship with Grey at all either, and then all of a sudden they act like it’s so dramatic that her and Grey have this falling out. You barely even saw them together. And what happened to who her father is, that made the Chief give her a second chance? Unless that’ll come into play later, but I’m kind of wondering if they just decided to call that story line a wash and move on. Which I’m fine with, btw.

At the end of the day, the old gang hits up Joe’s. Addison can’t believe that Sloan sprung the “Derek getting engaged thing” on her the way he did, but knows its time for her to move on. Derek arrives after his surgery with the pregnant woman to a rousing applause, and they order him a drink. Addison pulls him aside and tells him that he was a God today, but now it’s time for God to get back into his tiny little box for good. (Don’t worry though, she’ll see you on Christmas!)

When Derek sits down, Sloan, Naomi and Sam begin to serenade him with THE song. They begin, which includes phrases like, ‘saw her over a dead body’ and ‘or as I’m as dead as that body.’ It’s as super as it sounds. They keep laughing and drinking and singing the obnoxious song while meanwhile at the hospital, the pregnant woman is crashing.

From there, Grey’s Anatomy ends and Private Practice begins. This whole thing, as you know, really annoys me because I don’t want to watch Private Practice, but they are forcing me. I’m going to cover the basics of the episode that pertain to Grey’s Anatomy since the next episode will be another special crossover event, but I’m leaving the PP stuff alone.

At Joe’s, the gang are all drinking and dancing around like a scene from the Big Chill. Derek gets the call from the hospital about his patient and runs off. He tells the crew it has nothing to do with Archer, but they don’t believe him and all head out after him. The drunk crew shows up at Seattle Grace to see how Archer is doing. Bailey is like, why in the world are you drunks here. Leave Archer alone.

The pregnant woman is struggling with complications and can’t breathe. Derek is checking up on her and not sure exactly what is wrong. There were slight complications during her surgery but it shouldn’t be causing this.

Derek talks to Addison about the pregnant woman unable to figure out what is wrong with her. Addison, specializing in babies, can tell that it is probably the baby that is the problem. Thank goodness Addison was there! Addison, still fresh from the bar, Derek and Karev look at a sonogram of the baby. The husband tries to find out what is wrong because the woman was fine when she got to the hospital, now she’s had brain surgery and something is wrong with their baby. Get in line buddy, you aren’t the first to get worse the longer you stayed at this hospital. They find out that the baby is anemic and is causing the problems.

In a side conversation, Karev confides in Addison that something is wrong with Izzie. He can feel the train a-coming but he doesn’t know what’s about to hit. He’s tired of being with the crazy chick and part of him just wants to run in the other direction. It seems really weird that he is just now noticing that Izzie doesn’t have the train all the way in the station. Did you not notice when she was having sex with ghosts?

I’m unable to grab my remote quickly enough after it switches to the LA hospital, and it’s a lot of baby crying and I’m reminded once again why I don’t want this show. Moving on.

Derek and Addison continue to disagree on Jen (the pregnant woman’s) treatment. Addison is treating patients now? In her high heels, pearls and post Joe’s apparently. The tests that they have been running on Jen and her baby aren’t producing good results. Addison isn’t sure how to treat this except to get the baby out of her. The baby is only 24 weeks and not ready to come out, but the priority has to be the mom.

When they update Jen on this situation, she refuses to have him come out. She insists that they have to keep the baby in for another 2 weeks or he will die. They tell her that both she and the baby are in congestive heart failure and could both die if they don’t take her out. Derek chimes in about one other alternative that Addison thoroughly disagrees with. Addison thinks it will kill both of them, and her face says she’s about to kill Derek. After they leave she yells at Derek for giving an option that really isn’t possible.

Derek tells Addison that he nicked her aneurism during the surgery, and that is what has caused these repercussions. He feels responsible for her and the baby, which is why he insists they have to save them both. Ah, and the truth comes out. Way to go GOD!

They take Jen into surgery and everything appears to be going well in the surgery that Addison and Derek are performing together. Isn’t there some type of 12 hour period that doctor can’t drink before performing surgery? Like pilots have?

After the surgery, Addison wants to hear from Derek about this ring that came from Mamma D. She can’t understand why Mamma D never liked her. He tries to argue, but in the end he confirms that, yeah….she hated you and sleeping with my best friend really didn’t help. They update Jen’s husband on the procedure and tell him that she and the baby are both fine. Jen wakes up and she and her husband begin to celebrate everything being successful. As she talks she begins to mumble random words, that make no sense. Even caught a niner in there.

The husband looks up alarmed and asks what’s wrong with her. Her brain isn’t functioning meaning…..we’re now eventering week three of the “special” crossover event.

I hope nobody minds that I ignored the private practice stuff. There’s enough melodrama within Grey’s, without including a slew of extra side stories. And there are only so many ways I can say that I think Taye Diggs is hot. The scenes for the next episode are dramatic and bring the question, Doctor or God? Which is only slightly different then the question a few weeks ago, Doctor or Executioner? I think the overall story is good, ignoring the obvious logistical holes like….Addison and Derek in surgery after drinking at Joe’s. Plus I appreciate watching Taye Diggs for 2 hours.

What about you guys? Did you like the 2 hour event, or do you prefer it quick and dirty? Personally I like to keep it short and sweet but also appreciate spicing things up a little…..That’sWhatSheSaid