Hell’s Kitchen (Part 2) Recap: Nut So Good

12 Comments

1. 1
   BlueCanary
   Posted June 14, 2012 at 6:58 pm

   Great recap! I’m to the point where I have no favorite as of yet–just some I hate less than others. It seems like the competitors just get worse every season, devolving, sort of like what happened to the Real World cast over the years.

   “I figure if I ignore him, he’ll just go away. ”

   IF ONLY.

2. 2
   Chris Velazquez
   Posted June 14, 2012 at 11:39 pm

   Indeed, there’s such few likeable chefs this time and so many hateful ones. Royce is a self-important douche, Robyn and Dana are nasty bitches. I especially hate Kimmie and her immature, foul-mouthed, ball-busting, blonde-hating, bad attitude. And as someone who’s struggling with my weight right now, I say please, do not hold back on making jokes about Kimmie regarding her massive overweight. Bitch’s got her own zodiac sign, it’s called Whale. She’s the poster girl for “yo momma so fat” jokes. See? It’s easy!

   Roshni pains me, though. On the first day, she serves a delicious signature dish, and she did well alongside Kimmie, but other than that, she’s been just bad. I actually hope she can manage to do better on the blue team. I mean, damn, this girl competed and won on Chopped, and considering that show ain’t easy at all, it means she can actually cook well, so it makes me wonder what the hell’s her deal here.

3. 3
   Mummy Butterfly
   Posted June 15, 2012 at 5:32 am

   As I said in my comment on the mini-cap – I really think putting Barbie on dessert (that was where she was, right?) was a calculated move by Gordon and Producers to get her out of the line of fire tonight (and I swear they are trying to make us LIKE her!).

   Robyn. UGH! Kimmie. UGH! Roshni. UGH! I can’t think of anyone on the red team I care about… Wait, I can’t think of anyone on the BLUE team I care about either…

   It’s a season of drama, but if they don’t start showing me someone who can actually COOK, I’m going to be very disappointed in this season of HK.

4. 4
   PopePhilly
   Posted June 15, 2012 at 11:27 am

   I think I like Patrick on the blue team and Christina on the red team (I’ve already outlined my bias toward her). I like them the most mainly because they don’t speak very much. That’s all it really takes with this group.

5. 5
   chaosbutterfly
   Posted June 16, 2012 at 4:18 am

   I like Patrick and Guy, because they actually seem somewhat competent and Guy makes some funny jokes from time to time. He’s definitely a little bitch though. He tries to act big and bad, but the way he whined about Royce “throwing him under the bus” and that whole to do about him cutting his finger has shown his true colors.

   And I like Brian, but only because out of the whole blue team, he’s the easiest on the eyes. Please don’t judge me. He sure can’t cook though, and it looks like he can barely form a cohesive thought. I mean..how do you literally burn through all the cod for the entire dinner service and not have one successful serving to show for it? Not one?! At what point do you realize that this isn’t working and that you need help? And if he’s standing there, watching the fish cook in the pan, HOW did he burn piece after piece? Did he not finally learn the timing for it? Does he not know what the color brown looks like? My God.

   On the girl’s team, I actually like Barbie LOL.
   I don’t think she can really cook either (but really, nobody here can, so oh well) but I find her kind of amusing. I would have killed her for that passive aggressive banging around the kitchen stunt, but watching her do it to others was hilar.
   Christina is okay too.

   Everyone else can pretty much go burn in a fire along with the mountains of food that they’ve fucked up and rendered inedible, no 1 curr.

   And please don’t be afraid of Kimmie fat jokes…I’m doing the weight loss thing right now and even I had to guffaw loudly at Danielle’s comments about Kimmie weighing 500, no, make that 5 million pounds. And Kimmie scarfing down those testicles didn’t do her any favors…it’s like OF COURSE the fat girl is gonna be the one to gobble up all the testicles and lick the plate after they’re all gone. Of course.

6. 6
   snowshoecat
   Posted June 16, 2012 at 5:10 am

   please. Why can’t the producers find real chefs for this contest? Is it because there wouldn’t be so many hilarious disasters in the kitchen that most Gasmii could avoid?

   Thank you.

   Love, love, love your comments, PPhilly!

7. 7
   vallegirl
   Posted June 16, 2012 at 12:22 pm

   If I have to guess about the whole testicle-eating drama, I’d bet they had to finish what was on the plate. Each woman would get 2 or 3 to eat, but Danielle then Dana started whining about how gross it is and how they can’t eat them and wah, wah look at us pretend to vomit, so Kimmie lived up to every one of her stereotypes and ate the ones Dana and Danielle wouldn’t.

   Of course, giving Kimmie the moral high ground turned her into an even bigger troll than normal so he kept bugging Danielle with “I ate five testicles” (heh) so Dana would never forget she was a whiny little brat about the whole thing. That’s why I think Christina apologized for not doing more.

   So no one wins in this situation because both Danielle and Kimmie were awful in their own special ways, but I think that might have been the root of their awfulness this episode.

8. 8
   Laura Gill
   Posted June 16, 2012 at 5:38 pm

   Guy must have been the biggest crybaby in the Israeli Army, because even the women over there will eat you for breakfast. With hummus.

9. 9
   Mummy Butterfly
   Posted June 16, 2012 at 6:08 pm

   @Laura…oooooh! Hummus!

   @Chaosbutterfly…yeah, Barbie is growing on me and that is scary!

10. 10
    awfuleyebrow
    Posted June 18, 2012 at 7:23 am

    These people are unbelievable. I can’t imagine them working on any fast paced line. It is conceivable that you could run out of fish during an especially busy service. You would never want to have more fish in stock than you would normally use in two days, so if you had a busy night and a run on fish it could happen. The inconceivable part is running out without actually serving any fish.

    And none of them seem to comprehend the basic rhythm of line service, or the necessary communication to keep things moving at that rhythm.

    They all just seem so slovenly. I can’t imagine sitting in the diningroom and viewing those slatterns and oafs fondling my dinner. I think I’d lose my appetite.

11. 11
    Miss_C.
    Posted June 22, 2012 at 2:53 pm

    Not that I need another reason why we’re friends…

    I totally agree with you re: Robyn being the worst kind of pushover. She honestly believes that she’s tough and independent and puts on this hard attitude when she’s talking to the camera, but she’s completely blind to the fact that she is never the first one to come up with an idea. She’s constantly just chiming in and agreeing with the idea that’s the most popular. The team hates Barbie for some reason? There’s Robyn with the other mean girls putting her up for elimination at every opportunity, even if there are other girls who were kicked out of the kitchen or performed worse. And when one tiny misunderstanding threatens to bring down Robyn and Kimmie’s friendship (what a stable relationship that is!), Robyn is begging Kimmie to talk it out because she can’t stand not being liked.

    I also don’t understand why chefs on “Hell’s Kitchen” always want to be adventurous and make something they’ve never attempted before (like when Kimmie wanted to make the curry). (This is true for “Masterchef,” too!) If you could be eliminated, why on Earth would you not use your strongest dish instead of something you’ve never made in your life? Granted, they sometimes have no choice in the matter (like when they have to taste and reproduce one of Gordon’s dishes or if they all have to make the same thing), but if there’s a choice, I don’t understand not taking the little bit of control you have over the situation. If you’re trying something for the first time, it can be either brilliant or a total disaster, and there’s a 50/50 chance of either one happening.

12. 12
    PopePhilly
    Posted June 23, 2012 at 12:37 pm

    Welcome to the Gasm, Ms_C.! I hope you can stick around for a while. I think you’d like us all here.

    Also, I hope Mr_Y. can join you from time to time!

    Now, when Kimmie made curry, at least she had Roshni (who knew how to make it) to help her out. That’s an OK time to take a big risk like that. Other than that, stick with what you know!!!! It just makes sense.