This week, Hell’s Kitchen starts pretty much where it left off.
Did I stutter? Suck it Bitches!!
How about a smoke and some bitching? Giovanni immediately calls Seth over. He wants Seth to know he doesn’t respect him. Poor Seth is heartbroken over this unexpected revelation. Yeah, right.
Giovanni tells us he is pissed at Seth for putting him up for elimination, and he did it to save his own skin. Which, duh. Does anyone remember what happened when Wil put himself up for elimination? Seth may be a lot of things, but he is no dummy when it comes to saving his own skin.
Dude, what the fuck is up with that chain? Where’s your IROC-Z?
Seth informs everyone that he is here to play a game the way he wants to play it. No one else is going to tell him how to play it. Giovanni will back him up in the kitchen, but outside? Don’t talk to him Seth.
Seth is really hurt by this. “You mean Giovanni won’t hang out with me on the weekends? O God. Trust me Giovanni, I ain’t calling you either.” I’m so glad to see everyone is on the same page.
Giovanni’s still going on about how they’re a team, if Seth needs help in the kitchen, fine, and Seth says he’s there too, if anyone needs help. Giovanni dismisses that. “Trust me; I don’t need your help.” Seth’s response is awesome: “I know, you’re a three star Michelin already. Cooking steaks. WOW.” Hee hee.
Let’s break up the tension a little bit, shall we? Robert has decided to do an impersonation of Chef Ramsey. Robert cannot do a British accent either. He actually gets some of the mannerisms down pretty well, but he never loses it and starts going fucking nutso, which I would think is a crucial part of any Ramsey impersonation. All the chefs love it. Like really, really love it. It’s not that good. I think they’re drunk. Or maybe really tired. Or both.
At 7:00 am the next morning, they gather in the dining room. Chef Ramsey asks Carol who the strongest cook on the red team is. She says it would be herself or Andrea. Andrea is, of course, happy to hear her name. LA and Coi are not looking too happy. Paula knows she’s someone to look out for, and she doesn’t need Carol to reconfirm that for her.
I’m good. I AM good. I am good.
The men are asked the same question, but instead of asking just one of them, he just throws it out there to the whole team. For a minute they all just stand there, and then Danny identifies himself as the best.
Ben says that as a chef asking that question, he would be waiting to see which arrogant prick raised their hand to say it’s them. I think he was hoping someone would do a Carol and say themselves and Ben. Sorry Ben, no one thinks you’re the best.
Ramsey thinks the one thing that’s missing in both teams is teamwork. I thought competent cooks were missing also, but hey, what the fuck do I know?
Today’s challenge will force all of them to work hand in hand as a team. For a minute my eyes light up as I think he’s going to shackle them together or something, forcing them to cook as one. Come on, wouldn’t that be awesome?
Alas, my bondage fantasies are thwarted. The challenge is breakfast.
So an intersting tidbit that I was told is that breakfast is the most difficult service. You have a lot of orders, all coming in at the same time, all with several components, and apparently cooking eggs to order for a large crowd is no easy task. If you are not organized, you will be in the shit but quick. I would have never thought that, so thanks for the info!
Thirty minutes until open. Paula tells us she hates doing breakfast, and this will probably be her worst service. She offers to take pancakes. Colon’s got hash browns. The women are dividing the tasks quickly and without any fuss.
Over on the men’s side Seth is telling the team he knows about Ramsey’s eggs. Giovanni’s face is cracking me up.
Wow. If looks could kill.
Seth says, “He has a way of doing scrambled eggs that would definitely impress him.” Umm, if it’s his way of doing eggs, doesn’t it go without saying that he likes the eggs to be done that way? Seth goes on to say the eggs are phenomenal, and he has them down perfect. Giovanni, I think, just wants to shut him up, so he tells him to take to take eggs.
Seth tells us he can belt out some eggs, and he actually uses one of Gordon Ramsey’s amazing recipes. Raise your hand if this surprises you. Anyone?
Gordon. Please bend over so I can properly insert my head up your ass. Thank you!
Ready to meet your customers? Yes, Chef. They will be cooking for football players and cheerleaders. Don’t get too excited – they’re kids. Although, how great would it have been if they had to cook breakfast for NFL players and cheerleaders? Wait, never mind, whoever got the cheerleaders would have an unfair advantage – they’d probably all order grapefruit halves, or Dexatrim and coffee.
The kids are really cute, and both teams are getting a kick out of them. Of course, the girls have the cheerleaders and the guys have the football players, and each group of kids has come up with a cheer/chant for their teams.
Cheerleaders? “I said a hold up, wait a minute, let’s put some shakin’ in it.” Boys? “Who’s house? Blue’s house.” Did they spend all summer learning those? I would demand a refund. Oh wait, my kid is going to be on TV? Carry on.
Whichever teams serves all fifty of their kids first, wins.
Andrea ponders giving Chef Ramsey a hand job to secure the win.
You and JP? How ’bout it Chef?
So…were you aware that the men have won all the challenges so far? Andrea thinks you’re really not experiencing Hell’s Kitchen until you’ve had to endure one of the punishments. She gets no argument from me on that one.
The orders start coming in, and this kid is, without a doubt, my immediate favorite.
Uncanny resemblance, don’t you think?
C&A: “While the blue team gets down to business, a chef on the red team gets into the spirit.”
Ugh. Instead of keeping an eye on her hash browns, Colon has decided to take a trip down memory lane, and is cheering in the kitchen. Isn’t there a law against that? If there’s not, there should be.
Paula is trying to get Colon’s attention, but she is too busy. She has spirit, yes she do, she has spirit, how ’bout you?
Colon is proud to tell us that she can still fit into her cheerleading outfit at home. That statement begs a couple of question. First, why would a grown woman still have her cheerleading uniform? How does she know that it still fits her? And, what sort of kinky shit is going on at Colon’s house?
Paula thinks that cheerleaders are adorable. You know, when they’re KIDS. “It’s when they get older that they get more annoying.” Ha. Paula, you make me chuckle. Ramsey just wants Colon to get the fucking hash browns on.
The guys are doing well so far, and are in the lead. Until they start getting sloppy on the plating of the hash browns. Aren’t hash browns always sloppy looking?
Ramsey yells to Robert, “Hey fats, come here, oy.” The fucking plate is fucking disgusting. It looks like they think they’re serving fucking pigs, but they’re not pigs, they’re fucking children. Uh, Chef? Those fucking children can hear your fucking filthy mouth. I don’t think their parents are going to be too happy when they start adding the word fuck to their sentences. Shit.
Robert is not happy about getting yelled at. “Chef don’t see everything. J is the one plating the potatoes. I didn’t put those potatoes on the plate; I just took the fucking whipping.” Ramsey tells Robert if he does it again he’ll be kicked out of the kitchen. “It’s breakfast, fucking respect it.”
This is how you show respect.
C&A: “Meanwhile, over on the red side, there’s not much to cheer about.” Hardy ha ha ha.
Sous Chef Gloria is giving Coi a hard time, refusing to serve one of the pancakes, saying she wouldn’t eat it.
Why not? Looks tasty.
C&A: “Back in the blue kitchen, the men are discovering that a team is only as strong as its weakest link.”
I wonder who he could possibly mean?
Seth is falling behind on the eggs. On some of the plates, there are more hash browns than eggs. That’s the norm for me, and I like it that way. Ben tells us that it’s very apparent that Seth doesn’t have a clue. “Just get the eggs rolling. Scoop and serve, scoop and serve.”
Who do I have to blow to get more fucking eggs?!?!?
Seth’s excuse is that scrambled eggs were ordered more than anything else. His viewpoint is that if the team sees he’s behind, they should jump in and make some eggs. He’s right about that, but he has failed to take into consideration the fact that they all hate his fucking guts.
He passes the next order over to Robert who doesn’t think he has enough on the plate. I wonder what Danny thinks about all this? “I bet you those football players could have cooked scrambled eggs better than Seth.” Thanks Danny!
Now that Seth has slowed down the output from the blue kitchen, the ladies have caught up. Both kitchens have served forty of their fifty customers. Four tickets left each!! Who will win the breakfast showdown?
There’s much yelling and running and hey! There’s goes PrettyGirl! Haven’t seen you much today!
The tension is high; they’re pushing through for the win, who will emerge victorious?!?
The women win. The crowd goes wild. Raaaaahhhhhhhhh.
And there was much rejoicing and much shattering of eardrums throughout the land.
Aawwww, the guys are not happy. Giovanni thinks that they should have kicked the girls’ asses. Sorry Giovanni, it was your turn for a spanking.
The women are super excited. Colon even does a cheer for her team.
What else is there to say?
Robert is chewing Seth out about the eggs. Seth thinks that everyone is at fault; “It’s not just one person, if it was just one person, it would mean that we’re not a team anymore.” Wha? I mean, I think I know what he’s trying to say – that you stand together as a team. But a loss can be due to one person that bones it.
Out in the dining room, the kids have Ramsey surrounded. This part was so cute. I mean, Ramsey can be a HUGE prick when he wants to, but with these kids, he’s so freaking adorable. It’s obvious that he loves kids.
At one point he yells over to JP to help him and JP just laughs. Brilliant.
He is too cute.
After the kids are gone, the teams gather round. The men’s punishment? Well, they have to clean the dining room, both kitchens (which are fucking GROSS), AND do all the prep for both kitchen for tonight’s service. Wow. That’s a lot of work. I sure hope they finish it all.
Ladies? Your prize is…….camping. Bwa hahahaha.
I’m with them, camping is a punishment, not a prize.
But not just any style of camping. Beverly Hills style. I loves it when he fucks with them. Of course, they are much happier once he has added Beverly Hills into the description.
They’ll be lounging all day pool side and getting pampered. I’m not quite sure how that’s considered camping. I’d call it a pampering day, or life before children. But whatever you want to call it, they are loving it! He tells them to hurry up and go get into their bikinis because the limo, it is awaitin’.
Dear God, my eyes have STILL not recovered from the naked picture of Alex that Yenta posted in her recap. So please please PLEASE do not show me PrettyGirl in a bikini. There is not enough Clorox in the world to remove the image from my mind. Thank you. Amen.
As the women run upstairs to change, PrettyGirl totally falls on her ass running out of the kitchen. Her team asks if she is ok, and she says “No! I’m great!!” Hee, that was cute.
LA tells the girls she will NOT be wearing a bikini. I’m sure she will be enjoying everyone else in their bikinis. “Good thing we shaved our legs.” Did they have a leg shaving party or something? I hope they didn’t forget the bikini area. YIKES.
The guys are taking their loss with grace and dignity. It is not lost on Ramsey. “Why are you looking so pissed off?” They tell him that they should have won the challenge, that they had it in their grasp. He says they should be pissed off, their performance was shit.
He sends them upstairs to wait for JP to call them when he is ready for them. You know, after all the crud in the kitchens has time to get even more disgusting and difficult to clean. Enjoy!
Ben has decided that the team needs a leader, and he is the guy they need. He tells his teammates that he doesn’t like fucking losing. No shit, dipstick. Does anyone like to lose? Ben starts running through his list of how he helped everyone. Danny, he was over helping you, and then he was helping on the eggs….
Danny’s basically like dude, instead of running around the kitchen like a freaking bull on crack, you should have just stayed on eggs the whole time.
Ben tells Danny he was drowning on the pancakes. Danny recalls it a little differently. In his version, Ben helped him walk the pancakes up, so thanks for that. We weren’t shown any of this, so I am taking no sides on the great pancake debate.
So now we get to the crux of it. The guys are still ticked off that Danny said he was the best cook. Danny knows he needs to calm his teammates down so they can all get past their egos and work together. “I am obviously the best cook on the team.” Ha.
Ben does not agree. “You wanna hear somethin’ dude? I will cook circles around you. I will circle you like a fucking moon.” Um, oooo-kay. Danny’s response? “Where you been?” Ben responds, “Are you joking me? You couldn’t cook my dick.” Would you really WANT him to, dude?
I cannot believe there is actually food that looks like cooked cock. Meet geoduck (pronounced gooey duck). Doesn’t it look delish?
They go back and forth at each other with Ben throwing in more of “Are you joking me?” Right now, he is reminding me of my three year old when he says “You mad to me Mommy?” Language skills of a toddler. Yeesh.
Ben leaves. I guess he wants to go try to calm down, which is probably a smart move. Danny’s still flapping his gums, and Giovanni’s trying to quash the fight. Ben ends up out on the patio, and picks up a chair. We cut back to the inside and hear a crash. Puh-lease. If he had really thrown that chair there is NO WAY they wouldn’t have shown it. Don’t try to add superfluous drama, show!!
Danny interviews that Ben has a stick up his ass about him. But in all fairness, he can understand it because he is a cocky shit who likes to run his mouth. He tells the rest of his team, “Don’t get all uppity at me bro until you fucking show up.” Alrighty then.
The ladies are loving the fighting. Andrea hopes it causes a little sliver in their foundation. And then she wants to crack it wide open. “Heh, she said crack.”
The guys start on their punishment while the ladies head out for their day by the pool.
Robert repeats my earlier request, “Please Lacey, don’t wear a bikini, that’s all I’m asking.” Okay. So. I did echo the same sentiment earlier, so take this for what it is. BUT. Did anyone else find it to be just a little hypocritical of Robert? I mean, a couple of episodes ago he was crying to us about how he is always discriminated against because of his weight. I like the guy, but it’s a little bit of a double standard he’s got going there, doncha think?
Colon’s super excited because the women have been delivered to the Pretty Woman hotel. Or as Kit calls it, “Reg Bev Wil” I am not surprised that Colon is so excited. After all, both she and Julia Roberts charge the same fee.
$300 for this.
Or for this. You decide which is the better deal.
The girls begin their pampering.
Back at Hell’s Kitchen, Robert is disappointed in both Ben and Danny for their fighting. But Ben more than Danny because of the things Ben was saying. “Who is he to make others feel small?” I’m so not going there.
Back to the ladies. Pamper, pamper, pamper. And, yes, it is just that exciting.
Let’s get back to the guys, shall we? Robert is now telling Giovanni that Ben needs to go because of the fighting. Wow Robert, how’s the view up there on that high horse?
With about two hours left before open, the guys are still prepping both kitchens, and Danny worries if they’re going to be ready for service.
The ladies arrive back and are happy to see the guys prepping their stuff. They’re giving them shit as they go through the kitchens. “You call this shit clean.” “Prep that shit you bitches.” Hey, payback’s a bitch boys.
As I predicted last week, the guys don’t like being on the other end of the gloating. Now they don’t want to just beat the girls, they want to crush their dreams and hopes. Awww, the babies don’t like to lose. Wah wah wah.
Why is Carol adding fake hair to head for service?
This isn’t a fucking beauty pagent.
Once the ladies have changed into their chef’s uniforms, they come back downstairs to the kitchen and actually start to help finish the prep. LA doesn’t understand why the guys didn’t finish their punishment. Me either. That is pretty bogus.
Andrea tells Chef Gloria that they are missing tomato sauce from the guys. So where is it? No one has started it yet, but Ben says he will get right on it.
Pre-service pep talk time. Ramsey tells the ladies they are glowing. He also wants to know how it went for the men. Here is where someone should tell him that the guys did not finish the prep. No one does. Instead, he asks if they bonded. They did. Really? I must have missed that part.
JP, open Hell’s Kitchen.
The guys get the first order. How long for the spaghetti Giovanni? “I’m waiting for the water to boil, Chef.” Uh oh. Guess what? Chef Ramsey is not happy. Not only is the water not boiling, it doesn’t have olive oil in it, nor is it seasoned. Oh Gio.
C&A: “While Giovanni’s in hot water, over in the red kitchen, Coi is trying to get ahead.”
So Coi apparently learned nothing from the time that Colon got her ass handed to her when she cooked pasta ahead of time. Ramsey wants to know why she can’t cook it to order, and she tells him she’s just trying to get ahead. “You’re not that good!” Ow. That hurts.
To her credit, Coi handles it well, telling us, “I was trying to get so many steps ahead, so I am kicking myself in the ass, because if I would’ve listened better, he wouldn’t have screamed at me.” I like Coi.
Ramsey tells her to put some more spaghetti in. “Yes, Chef.” “Hey, I’m joking you stupid cow.”
Dude, stop comparing them to me, it hurts my feelings.
Back in the blue kitchen, Seth has delivered his first order of scallops to the pass. I think you and I both know that the scallops are not going to be up to par. Ramsey would like Seth to go fuck himself. The scallops are rubber.
J doesn’t think that Seth has the skills to hack it. That he makes a lot of rookie mistakes. We’ll come back to that one later.
Meanwhile, Chef Ramsey has made Seth a little rubber scallop, egg and bacon sandwich. Seth tells us he was happy to eat them since he hadn’t eaten any dinner before service.
Thank you sir, may I have another?
Andrea comes into the men’s kitchen looking for that tomato butter sauce. Ramsey looks ready to rip her ass open until she tells him that she’s looking for the sauce. Rut Roh. Where is it? Ben has it, but it’s not finished. Ramsey smells sabotage, but it’s really Robert squeezing out an SBD.
“Why’s the sauce not ready?” Ramsey wants to know. Ben doesn’t really give him an answer beyond telling him he’ll get it ready now. “God, what a muppet.”
Muppet appears to be Ramsey’s insult word of the season. Like donkey, donut and plank before it, I think it has great potential.
Did anyone else notice that C&A was cracking up a little after that? Muppet is a keeper, y’all.
Back in the red kitchen, Coi has delivered the spaghetti to the pass. Time for a group taste trip! “Dry, bland, under-seasoned, undercooked.” Coi says “I should have tasted it better, Chef.” Nonsense Coi!! It is wonderful this way. This is how we will be serving spaghetti from now on.
Uh oh, we have reached the portion of the evening when Chef Ramsey starts to abuse the garbage cans. Poor dears. Coi never knew cooking pasta could be so hard. Neither did I.
Can you please get the fuck out of here so I can crack open one of these bottles? Thanks SO much.
We’re about an hour into service at this point, and C&A tells us the customers are getting restless. We see one guys ask if the food will be out soon, and his friend laughs at him. At least someone came here with realistic expectations. Just eat at home first people.
Here comes Ben with the ladies’ butter sauce. Ramsey wants to know, “What have you done to sabotage it?” He’s so suspicious tonight, I love it.
Ramsey tastes the sauce, then calls Andrea over to taste it. I thought that was interesting. Was he testing her? I’m guessing he was, but I could be reading too much into it. Anyway, she thinks the sauce tastes like shit. Yep, she’s right. He thinks it tastes like shit too.
Ben tells us he took a gamble. “I didn’t taste it before I put it out. My fault.” Yes, you’re right. It is your fault. Taste the food jackasses!!
He returns to the blue kitchen and says to Danny, “Hey, as long as you’re over there and not cooking, do you mind getting some tomato butter sauce going?” Danny’s on it. Whatever he’s cooking, he’s gonna get it out.
Red Kitchen. Andrea is taking the reins. She’s tells PrettyGirl to finish the spaghetti with basil and get it up to the pass. And I swear PrettyGirl was ducked down eating. Again. Andrea’s a natural leader. She just falls into because it’s in her blood. Also in her blood? A little Vulcan, I think.
Check out the Spock brows.
Danny is ready with his attempt at the tomato butter sauce. Let’s see how he does. Ramsey thinks that it’s much better. Danny’s head gets a little bit bigger. Soon that bandana won’t be able to wrap around his head.
Ramsey, never one to leave it alone, tells Ben, “That sauce now, that tomato sauce is much better. What you sent over there was fucking disgusting.” He then goes on to say that Danny is a thousand times better.
I told you I was the God of Cooking.
If I stabbed him in his sleep, would they suspect it was me?
J sends out a salad with the butt of the lettuce in it. Obviously it gets returned to the kitchen. That is pretty fucking bad. I mean, how do you miss that? Seems like, I don’t know, maybe a rookie mistake?
J tells us that J feels like a jackass because of that fricking lettuce. No J, you are a jackass because you continue to refer to yourself in the third person. Please stop. This is your last warning.
Despite lettuce butts being served, the men have finished most of their apps and are now moving on to the entrees. Ben is ready to impress.
Are you there, God? It’s me, Ben. Please let the Chef like me tonight. Please? Double please?
He’s ready to roll. He’s cooked a hell of a lot of lamb and he is ready to unleash the beast. ROAR. He brings the lamb to the pass…….and time for another group meeting. Maybe he should have kept the beast on the leash.
The lamb chops are all gnarly looking. Robert says they look like carpaccio on a bone. Not quite that bad, but still, they shouldn’t be served looking the way they do. Ramsey want to know, “How can someone so fucking fat slice something so fucking thin?” I’m not sure what he means by that. Does he think fat people can’t enjoy thinly sliced meat? I beg to differ.
Over in the red kitchen, LA seems to be having some difficulty working with Colon. Perhaps a barium enema would help. She tells Carol she is getting so fucking pissed. Colon is cooking the meat, but then bringing it back to the oven to keep it warm. Uh, that’s how it gets overcooked dipshit. LA doesn’t like Colon constantly tugging on her arm and asking her stuff. She does seem to be pretty annoying here.
LA brings two Wellingtons up to the pass. The ends are not trimmed off. LA says she told Colon to do it, but I’m wondering why she didn’t see that they weren’t trimmed when she was walking them up. I mean, it’s not like the ends were hidden or anything.
Is that a hickey on her neck? LA! Do tell!
Back on the blue side, there’s chicken at the pass, but it’s missing garnish. “Where’s the garnish?” No response from Danny who is working the garnish station tonight. “Where’s the fucking mashed potatoes?!? I need the garnish Danny.” Still no answer.
Danny tells us that station is rough. It’s not just heating up vegetables. Ramsey still wants to know “Where’s the fucking garnish? In thirty seconds, I’m going to fucking kick you out personally.” I am waiting for Ramsey to go completely apeshit, but finally Danny answers him. God, dude. Ramsey hates being ignored. You dodged a bullet there.
LA and Colon are ready to go with the meat again. One well, one medium well, and one medium. Colon brings up four. Ramsey thinks she’s trying to be funny. Hey Chef, maybe she thought you looked hungry.
Paula feels bad for her, I think. She tells us that Colon has been yelled at over and over and she handles herself well on the outside, but it’s got to be having an effect on the inside. I can’t even imagine being berated as often as she has and still holding it together. Yes, I admit it, I am a big fucking crybaby.
As Ramsey starts calling out the next order for the blue kitchen, Seth is saying “bacon, bacon, bacon, bacon” to Giovanni. Ramsey wants Seth to repeat the order. Of course he is unable to.
As he is standing in front of Ramsey, he is wiping his face with one of the dirtiest cloths I think I’ve ever seen. Really, not just his face. He’s got it going through his hair, and he’s wiping his nose. It is really gross.
And nasty. And sweaty. Blech.
But it doesn’t end there. We next see him wiping a pan out with the very same cloth! But wait! There’s more! THEN he takes the cloth again, and wipes his face. Ramsey sees this and calls him out on it. I have to say, he’s calmer than I thought he would be about it. I can’t believe he didn’t kick him out right then and there.
Both kitchens are rapidly devolving. Coi has spaghetti returned for being undercooked. Oh, and having no lobster in them. Ben’s Wellingtons aren’t ready, more food is coming back to the kitchen, Coi’s dropping the pasta pan, and Ramsey has had enough.
No one has won. Both teams, fuck off and decide who you are putting up for elimination. Shut. It. Down.
As the women sit down to deliberate, Andrea immediately gives props to PrettyGirl for tonight. Aww, good teamwork girls. Coi tells her teams she’s sorry, and says she thinks she’s going home. LA throws Colon’s name out there, and no one’s surprised to hear it, least of all Colon herself.
Coi knows she sucked ass tonight. But Carol hates PrettyGirl, you guys. She really could give a rat’s ass that she did good tonight, and instead tells the team to think about what would have happened if PrettyGirl had been on Coi’s station tonight. She thinks it would have been ten times worse.
Now. I think we’ve established that I am not a fan of PrettyGirl’s, BUT she seems to have done well tonight. Leave her alone, Carol.
PrettyGirl says, “Whatever. They’re gonna find any excuse to make me look bad even when I’ve done well.” Which seems to be happening. Hmmm, I wonder if they still resent the six hour nap. Women can hold grudges for a long long looonnng time. I know about these things.
Coi plans on putting herself up since everyone else did better than her. Obviously Colon is going up. They don’t say it, but I think it’s a given at this point that they’ll just keep putting her up until Ramsey finally kicks her out.
Over at the men’s nomination negotiations, Giovanni has picked Seth and Ben as his nominees. Ben wants to know if Giovanni’s fucking serious. Danny is nominating the same two people.
Ben does NOT agree. “Oh my God, you’re saying that I did the second worst in the kitchen today, and I do not believe that. I heard Danny’s name called just as much, if not more than my one lamb being sliced wrong, there’s no way I need to go down for this. No way. No fucking way.”
Okay. Yes, Danny’s name was called in the kitchen when he was late with the potatoes and chose to ignore Ramsey rather than answer him. But. He also got praise from Ramsey, which, sorry to say BEN, you did not.
Robert’s options are Seth’s mouth, Ben’s lamb, and J’s salad. The salad was pretty bad. J does not think that it is a reason for him to be on the chopping block. I’m sorry, I completely disagree. Serving the butt of the lettuce is worse to me than cutting the lamb too thin. Giovanni cracks me up. “It’s a pretty small salad.” You tell him, Gio.
Down to the dining room we go. Before Chef Ramsey asks for their nominations, he decides to give a little speech. The long and short of it is that, to his mind, serving the butt of the lettuce is far worse than messing up a meat order (hint, hint, hint). You can always refire the meat, but once you have served lettuce ass, your reputation could be in ruins overnight. I agree with him in principle (see above), but I think he’s being a little melodramatic here.
Danny, first nominee and why. First nominee is, of course, Seth. “For obvious reasons.” Danny also tells Ramsey that he considers fish to be one of the easier stations. I wonder if that will come back to bite him in the ass at some point. God, I hope so.
Second nominee and why. The second nominee is Ben. “We just feel like he hasn’t been able to perform for the dinner services.” Ramsey agrees.
PrettyGirl, first nominee and why. The first nominee is Colon based on her overall performance up until this point. Second nominee and why. “Second nominee Chef is myself.” “You?” “Yes, Chef.” Ramsey asks if she thinks there was anyone worse than she was tonight. Uh yeah, Coi was worse than me. Ramsey asks Coi what she thinks, and she says it was her worst performance so far. “Thank you for being honest.”
I really thought at this point he was going to bring up Coi and J instead of Ben and PrettyGirl, but he doesn’t. The four step forward.
PrettyGirl, what makes you think you have a future in Hell’s Kitchen?
You have to admit I’m getting better, a little better all the time (she can’t get no worse). Get-ting so much bet-ter all the time!
Colon? Why should you stay.
You live, you learn, you love, you learn, you cry, you learn, you lose, you learn.
Seth? Why do you honestly think you should stay in Hell’s Kitchen?
A heart full of love, a heart full of song, I’m doing everything all wrong. Oh God for shame, I do not even know your name. I am lost in your spell.
I’m simply the best, better than all the rest. Better than anyone, anyone you’ve ever met.
Ramsey’s decision is…..Ben. Get back in line. Nice fakeout.
The person leaving Hell’s Kitchen is…..Seth. In his parting words, Seth hopes that Ramsey is ready for the competition when he opens his restaurant in New York. I don’t think Ramsey will be worried about you, dude.
So, tomorrow’s a brand new day. PrettyGirl? You are now on the men’s team. Robert is not happy to get back the dead weight they just cut loose.
“Now all of you. Fuck off with ya.”
Carol wants to know how the girls got so lucky. “Not only are we rid of her, but they’re stuck with her. Thank you, Chef Ramsey!”
“And the bitches rejoice!” PrettyGirl would love the red team to find out she was not their problem. At least, she hasn’t been their only problem, that’s for sure. Now she wants to whoop their ass.
Chef Ramsey, any final thoughts on Seth? “He had all the passion in the world, but the bottom line is, he’s a crap cook.”
Guys? Is there anything you’d like to add?
S-E-T-H-O-U-T. That’s the the way we spell Yippee. Yipee, Seth’s out, Yipee, Woo!
Next time on Hell’s Kitchen, Ben wants to kick some PrettyGirl ass, she possibly wants to quit (again), Andrea chokes, and Robert wants Chef Ramsey to kiss his ass. C&A tells us that you’ll have to see it to believe it. Okay, well I’ll believe that when I see it.
PS – I am so excited that no one else has posted this news item yet. So, the New York Post has an article about this little nine year old boy who does an awesome impression of Ramsey. He spoofs him in some British ads, and Ramsey saw him and loved him. Now he is going to be on Hell’s Kitchen. They’re not saying exactly what he’s going to do, obviously they’ll want that to be a surprise. I personally, can’t wait to see it. For the article, click here. And here are the videos of Little Gordon’s work for your viewing pleasure. Enjoy.
And last but not least…..
Hope you enjoyed them as much as I did! See you next week, Gasmii!!