Leaving Las Vegas

I hope that there were a lot of people out there that got a chance to see the Heroes marathon on Sunday, and I would like to thank madeyoulaugh for having my back and reminding everybody. Being lazy and having no motivation is a lot easier when you know there are other picking up the slack for you, don’t you think? On behalf of all of us who were not smoking crack the last month, we welcome all of you new viewers who have finally caught on the best new show on television. This week’s episode featured more of the same, and while most people normally use that phrase to talk about a show that has become boring, saying that Heroes is giving us more of the same is a good thing. The show was great when it was about a bunch of people who learned that they have new abilities, and it’s become amazing as we’ve witnessed how the lives of all of these people are coming together.I am now resigned to the fact that we have to deal with the narrator. It looks like getting rid of him will be about as easy as getting rid of the Teamsters at a New Jersey mall construction, so for the love of my kneecaps and my sanity, I will know just fast forward over his bullshit. Mohinder has become almost a minor character lately, but we still rely on his insights at the beginning of the show to keep us informed of a number of things. This week, Mohinder talks a little bit about migration, saying, “When a change comes, some species feel the urge to migrate. They call it [unintelligible], the pull of the soul to a far-off place. Following a scent in the wind, a star in the sky. The ancient message comes, calling the kindred to take flight, to gather together. Only then can they hope to survive the cruel season to come.”

Although it has never been said out loud, I think that we have sort of figured out that the heroes are going to come together somehow. We know that there is an enemy out there (Sylar) that seems to be more powerful than any of the other heroes alone. We also know that there is a catastrophe (nuclear holocaust) another few weeks away that is going to take more than just one person to prevent. I mean, if Jack Bauer were a hero (secret ability: the uncanny ability to kick major ass), it would all be done in a day. Then again, it looks like Jack is going to be stuck in China for a bit. Stopping nuclear blasts is no problem, but he does have to get through over a billion communists first. I guess they’ll have to call it 25!

Anyway, the heroes are going to need help, but how do we even know that they are going to run in to each other? That’s where Hiro comes in. When we last saw Hiro, he went from his usual Revenge of the Nerds self to a sort of generic Asian warrior with a soul patch. If he didn’t turn all mellow playing warrior monks and shit, I’m sure Chow Yun Fat would have sued. Hiro had come from the future to give Peter a message. The Hiro that we know is care-free and full of jokes, but Hiro from the future is dead serious as if he just realized that saving the world involves more than traipsing around the US in a little Nissan waiting for your buddy to laugh at your jokes.

What guy says to their barber, “Make me look like I’m in a Pink video from 2001″?

Hiro says that he doesn’t have much time, but talks about “the girl”. The girl is the cheerleader, and they have to save her. What’s more, it’s the only way for them to prevent everything. How do we find the girl? Hiro tells Peter that he has to go back to Isaac’s. Most importantly, Peter must tell Hiro where to meet. And while Hiro said he didn’t have a lot of time, he did stick around long enough to wax poetic (have you noticed there is ALWAYS time to wax poetic?) about Peter’s place in history, saying, “You told me how many times how lost you felt. This is what you’ve been waiting for. Be the one we need. Save the cheerleader. Save the world”. As sayings go, it’s kind of lame, but this show has been good enough that I am willing to give them a free pass, but the slogan could have been better, like “Save the girl, or they’ll blow up the world.” or “Put out that five-sheeter and save the cheerleader” and my personal favorite “Nuclear explosions suck, so if you don’t help this cheerleader out, you can lick my balls.”

As Hiro leaves, time s back on Peter’s side, but he doesn’t know what happened. He shots out for Hiro, but it was all nonsense and I half-expected people to start throwing change hi way. Mohinder asks what happened, and Peter tries to explain, but once again, Mohinder has placed skeptics hat on. Whatever happened to the guy that was so upset that his father was killed and wanted to solve the world’s problems? I think Mohinder has been the most annoying character, so I am not too upset that it looks like he doesn’t care what is happening next. Then again, I am a little disappointed that there will never be a scene where Eden reveals herself to be working with Horn Rimmed Glasses, and gives us the pleasure of making Mohinder look like a fool. Peter asks Mohinder to go with him back to Isaac’s, but instead, he just says, “There are no answers Peter, Go Home”. What the hell? Does Peter have to cut his hair like Twiggy and make him macaroni and cheese before Mohinder will listen?

That is all very interesting and everything, but what I really wanted to know is what happened with Claire. I have complained about how much whining she has done this year, but she is clearly having a difficult time with all the changes she has been going through recently. Therefore, I am not going to get on her case for a little bit of justified vehicular homicide. Or should I sat attempted homicide. That’s right Brody (and obviously Claire) survived the crash. Claire wants to go home, but the doctors want to keep her and Claire’s mother decides to call her daddy.

At the time, her father was pretty busy. Horned Rimmed Glasses and Creepy Black Guy just grabbed Nathan Petrelli from the casino where he and Niki 2.0 had just spent an evening playing, uh, “Poke-her”. By the way, thanks to all the people who wrote in to tell me that the casino was the Montecito, from the NBC show Las Vegas. I had noticed, but forgot to mention. I love Las Vegas and every week I play a game called “How many eyes will Nikki Cox poke out if they turn down the air conditioning”. So far, the record is five.

When HRG gets his call, Nathan is able to make a run for it. Now, where he’s going, on the other hand, is sort of “up in the air”. He is wearing pajamas, has no shirt, and is somewhere in the middle of the Nevada desert. Oh, and there’s a fence that Nathan isn’t able to jump over. This “flies” in the face of everything that we know about him. Why doesn’t he just fly away? I guess he’s just trying to do what he does best. He’s a politician, so he’s going to try and weasel his way out of it first. Nathan says that he’s seen their faces and he’ll hunt them down if they don’t let him go. HRG says that won’t be a problem thanks to his little friend there, which I guess means Creepy Black Guy can erase memories or something. How convenient that the guy who erases memories is also pretty jacked and a perfect, creepy, henchman sidekick for somebody like HERG? I think I shall now call him “The Eraser” no because I love Vanessa Williams/ James Caan/ Arnold Schwarzenegger action thrillers, but because I like Thom Yorke’s latest solo album.

Now you see him.

HRG and Eraserman (see, it works in so many ways) are about to grab Nathan when he flies off. And this was not the floating he was doing like when he saves his brother. No, he broke the sound barrier, and there was no way that they were going to catch him now. Then again, I’m sure they will get another chance considering he can’t just go into hiding when he is still running for public office.

Now you don’t.

Once again, I know that I am a little late, but we have our first Matt Parkman sighting of the day. I never understood what Juddfan and Mrs. Parkman saw in him, but I guess it has to be something because Mrs. Parkman (I would call her by her name, but imdb is not being friendly again. I am happy to report that Special Agent Clea Duvall can now be called Special Agent Audrey Hanson) was going crazy looking for her husband. Matt had been missing since they had that fight and he left to go drinking and found himself being tested on by HRG. Just as she is about to go crazy, she sees Matt on the couch. He thinks he has only been gone a few hours and can’t believe that he has been gone a whole day. Luckily, side effects of The Eraser include a headache, so Mrs. Parkman believes he just ran out and got drunk.

I was really surprised to see how much Mrs. Parkman was worried, especially considering that fight they had. She said that she kept on picture him in a ditch somewhere, so maybe she’s mad that she never got the chance to be the one to put him there. For the record, Matt is just as surprised as I was.

We know what Hiro is a bad ass in the future, but in the present he is still a normal guy that can get thrown out of casinos if he causes too much of a ruckus. Hiro and Ando find themselves in the middle of the Nevada desert, but we all know that it could be a lot worse. The strip of desert where Hiro and Ando find themselves is not the same one Niki visited earlier, so we can rest assured that the Montecito security decided to take it easy on them.

Ando is completely pissed at what happened. You see, Hiro went down with one punch and they kept on kicking Ando before they decided to stop. Of course, it would have been wiser if Ando had warned Hiro about his plan, but that is a minor detail. Hiro is taking it all in stride. In his mind, what happened to them is exactly what they deserved for using his powers for personal gain. The only thing Hiro is worried about is filling his stomach with waffles. As for Ando, he decides that he is going to leave and meet up with his other friends in Vegas. And who would those other friends be? The only person he knows in Vegas would be Niki, but just because you chat online with somebody doesn’t mean they will actually acknowledge you in the real world, especially when the only time you chat with this girl, you are paying her money.

So, Ando decides to leave, and although Hiro is sort of upset that his best friend is no longer with him, something else grabs his attention. Some guy just dropped from the sky and landed in the parking lot. That man, of course, is Nathan and he strolls into diner, still in his pajamas, orders coffee and a t-shirt from the waitress and calls his men to come pick him up.

Also, does anybody know where this diner happens to be? I only say this because first Hiro and Ando walked in with their Lego-colored suitcases and nobody looked up. Then Nathan came in half-naked and people looked up, but in a way that was saying, “God dammit, when are these stupid politicians going to stop getting filmed having sex, trapped by a strange guy in horned rimmed glasses, escape, fly away, and end up here?” Really, I would love to know where this place is should I ever accidentally kill a hooker in Vegas and need to chop up her body and bury it somewhere. Not that I use hookers (less money for booze!) in Vegas or would accidentally kill them or would chop them up. But it’s nice to have a contingency plan.

Hiro can barely contain his excitement and walks right up to Nathan in order to speak with him. Somehow, Hiro was the only person in the diner to see Nathan fly, and when he tells Nathan what he saw, Nathan tries to play dumb (again, not a difficult task for a politician.), but Hiro is not buying it. In fact, Hiro believes that Nathan would be just as interested in meeting another “special” person as Hiro was, and explains how he is able to bend space and time. What Hiro really wants to do is convince Nathan to help him stop the bomb in New York, but Nathan isn’t interested, even after Hiro says that he is going to win his election by a landslide. Nathan’s guys finally come to pick him up, and although he is pretty sure Hiro is crazy, Nathan gives him a ride back into town.

Once back in town, Nathan drops of Hiro and goes to meet his people. Meanwhile, Hiro decides that he needs to continue to New York. Ando can keep his Vegas friends! Let’s call it Hiro: The Miz edition, because he is going “Back to New York”. The only problem with Hiro’s plan is that he doesn’t know how to drive. As somebody who just watched a movie on the culture of Japan, I have to say this is kind of crazy. Japanese kids today learn how to drive before they can walk. And sure, you may say that The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift is not an accurate source for citing Japanese culture, but the new home theater we recently put together in the TVgasm offices had to be tested out, and that JBL subwoofer would have laughed at me had I rented Memoirs of a Geisha. Anyway, Hiro is stuck. The manual is in English, and he is worried he won’t know how to operate the car properly, although I have yet to see that condition stop any of the Asians in Los Angeles from driving. Oh stop it! I keed! I keed! But seriously, if you are Asian and I offended you, I apologize. Just tell your people to use turn signals and we’ll call it even.

As much trouble as Hiro is having, Nathan’s day is just about to get a whole lot worse. Niki woke up in the room and didn’t remember anything that happened. We can’t be sure if her memory loss is because Niki 2.0 was on the prowl or The Eraser cleaned her up, but it doesn’t really matter. One of Nathan’s security men found her, and not finding their boss in the room, starts asking her some questions, not that they would get very far. After all, Niki 2.0 had a lot of fun last night, so her punches would probably land with a glow. Before Niki 2.0 popped out, casino security shuttled Niki away to their boss.

When she meets up with uptight Asian security expert, Niki is told she did a very good job. Niki replies that she wants to know what they did to her. And although I just called the Asian security expert uptight (seriously, that bun gives me a migraine just looking at it), she says, “As I saw it, a lot of things were done to you”. Ba-dum-ching! She’s here all week folks; don’t forget to tip your waiter. There on screen is Niki, getting busy with a senator. We didn’t see very much, but I am going to have to give Niki 2.0 some points for creativity.

You know when you were in sixth grade and they sent the boys to the gym teacher and the girls to the nurse? Why couldn’t they show this video?

Niki realizes that 2.0 did the dirty work, but it’s important for her to get back to her son. On her way out, she bumps into Nathan, who asks, “What did you do to me?” Niki knows nothing, and barely remembers Nathan, who seems disappointed because he didn’t get her phone number or something. Niki explains that she wasn’t herself, and she was trying to be somebody that she is not, which is all good and everything, but again, WHAT IS HER POWER? It has to be more than multiple personalities!

Even though Niki says that she doesn’t want to be with him, Nathan can barely control himself. He said that last night was one of the best nights of his life, and I think to myself “Is he kidnapped all the time or something so that doesn’t count?” which also makes me wonder. “Why didn’t HRG and The Eraser just knock Nathan out first?” It worked for Matt Parkman, why can’t it work for Nathan? But whatever. I am not sure what Nathan is thinking. He is married, and so he should forget about Niki for a couple of reasons 1) For better or worse, til death do us part and 2) He’s going to run for congress.

I know he can fly, but the Neo glasses are a bit much

Therefore, I am really happy when Niki breaks down and tells Nathan that they were taped. Again, it could have been worse. It could have been shot in night vision like that first part of the Paris Hilton Video. If they are going to bribe him, at least he knows that this video will have some replay potential. Nathan can’t believe it, like this random trip to Los Vegas in the middle of an election was completely unintentional. Seriously, what was he thinking? Has there EVER been a more obvious trap? Hearing this, Nathan decides that he should probably fix things.

You guys, I am really starting to think Horn Rimmed Glasses is kind of cool. I don’t want to get on his bad side, but he’s been acting quite normal. He wants to know about the Heroes, but he doesn’t hurt them. That doesn’t mean he won’t hurt them later, but if he wanted to hurt somebody, he could have done so already. He meets up with Claire at the hospital, and she tells her dad everything. OK, almost everything. She didn’t mention anything about her super healing powers, but she did say that Brody tried to force her at the bonfire. She started crying again, saying that she won’t be able to prove anything, but that it has already happened to other people. HRG says, “Nobody is going to know a thing”, so I guess he must have brought the Eraser back with him. By the way, wouldn’t it be hilarious if the Eraser’s name turned out to be named Stu or Ralph or something?

As you can imagine, Claire’s father was a little upset with what happened, and decided to have a little bit of a talk with Brody. Once again, Brody doesn’t really know when to shut his mouth. Last week, he was calling Claire a slut while she was driving his car, and this week, he tells Mr. Bennett that he is going to sue his ass, even though he was peeing through a tube. That probably would have been enough to send HRG over the edge, but then Brody had to call Claire a freak and not human.

Well, that’s all HRG needed to hear. He grabs Brody by his swollen face and tells him that he knows his daughter much better than even she does, which I guess is true, but is also sort of creepy when you really think about it. He then goes on to say that she is special, and it’s confusing what’s happening to her and she doesn’t need a punk making it difficult. At this point in time, I am thinking that HRG is going to finish the job that Claire started by killing Brody, but instead, HRG is actually giving him a second chance. After explaining that he will have the opportunity to forget all of the terrible things he has done and maybe become a better person, HRG steps aside. There’s The Eraser!

Before he leaves, HRG tells Eraser to “hollow him out. take everything”, which perhaps is to make us think that he is Sylar, but we clearly know that all of these strange autopsy/torture references that HRG has been making to the Eraser have to do with memory loss and not eating the brains out of a skull once you’ve killed them. As we speculated, Brody’s memory is gone. Claire walks in to apologize (good for her!), even though I think he deserved about as much of an apology as Sirhan Sirhan, but Brody doesn’t remember her. Talk about scooping out everything! Brody can’t even remember his own name!

Peter finally makes it back to Isaac’s place, this time not bothering to knock. He tries to explain the mission, but Isaac is not really that receptive, which is what really happens to anybody who sleeps with your girlfriend. Isaac isn’t about to celebrate his loss of Simone with the person that might have taken her away. Think about it. SImone is smart, lovable, huggable, doable like art, suitable to be part of my….err, there I go quoting Black Star again. But really, Simone is beautiful, smart, intelligent, spontaneous, and in a matter of weeks is about to inherit what looks to be considerable monies when her father dies. That is what I call a five-tool player!

Isaac doesn’t kick Peter out and even begins to listen to him when he says stuff like “I believe you” I know you can paint the future. And here is where that stupid slogan comes into effect. “Save the Cheerleader. Save the world”, might get all of us excited, but what about Isaac. It means nothing to him, even though he’s been painting a cheerleader for a while now, but it looks like there is one painting that is unfinished.

Peter begs Isaac to finish painting the picture, but Isaac thinks that he can only paint when he has high, and he is all out of smack. This shouldn’t be a problem because Nathan did give Peter enough cash to require a manilla envelope, but Nathan is smart. He is the guy that can absorb the power from others. Peter looks at the painting, and suddenly, he gets the eyes, just like Isaac does when he is all clairvoyantly painting and shit. One more panel of this comic book to go, and then they can all get to work.

By the time Niki gets back to her house, the place is infested with cops. They have been searching for her Husband, DL, who somehow pulled a Houdini act and slipped out of custody. As fans of 24, they realized a hard perimeter would not work, but the investigation is ongoing. The reason they were at Niki’s house was a top that DL was spotted nearby and the first place he would check is his wife’s place.

Niki believes that DL is a murderer, so she asks for police protection, but it looks like that all might not actually be needed. There is a noise at the back door. A strange figure walks in and the cops point their guns at…Ando? Yes, that’s right, it was Ando. Apparently he got Niki’s name through an Internet search. Niki tells the officers that he is a customer and then sits down to have a little bit of talk with one of her best fans. Although it ranks high on the creepiness scale, I am sure everybody felt bad for Ando. Poor guy thought that he actually had a chance. My heart was breaking as Niki had to explain to him the difference between fantasy and reality, right before he walks out of the house.

On the other hand, Nathan’s day was going great. Oh, Uptight Asian Lady tried to blackmail him, but things are not what we seemed. When I originally mentioned Mr. Lindermann, I thought he was an opponent. And even when I learned he was just a financier, I still thought things were fishy. It turns out that Nathan flew to Vegas as part of a $2 million dollar deal that he readily admits puts him in the pocket of Mr. Lindermann. Nathan is so confident that he raises his price to $4 million. Yeah, they went to a lot of trouble to get a black mail tape, but if he doesn’t win, the tape isn’t worth anything. If they went to all that trouble, then Nathan’s spot in Congress is worth more than he can imagine. And just like that, Nathan has completely sold out.

When Matt Parkman realized that his wife really had feelings for him, it became sort of a revelation. He realized that maybe he wasn’t trying enough. He starts listening to her, and yes it helps that he can read her mind, but isn’t it amazing what a little listening can do? Matt has a dinner laid out for his wife, but she is so happy with how much time he spent thinking about her that she starts to get horny. Forget the meal, Mrs. Parkman wants a little bite out of Matt!

Matt now realizes how nice it is to be able to hear voices. First of all, he knows everything his wife wants, like when a certain position isn’t comfortable, he should move, even though she may have fake moaned in the past. When it’s all over, she says “it was like you were in my head” and Matt wants to tell her something, but first, he reads that she wants some coffee ice scream, so he heads to the convenience store to buy some.

Once at the convenience store, the bad part about Matt’s ability comes through. He hears somebody talking like they want to rob the store, and he actually talks this guy out of it. I know, that’s not the bad part. Once again, the bad part comes a little later. Hearing one voice at a time is great; hearing many voices is going to drive you crazy, and Matt sometimes starts to hear so many voices that he can barely concentrate enough. We leave him as he is about to pass out, which kind of sucks because they are going to find him with a gun like he was going to rob the place. Hopefully the security footage will exonerate him, but it might not. Whatever the case, we’ll just have to wait until next week to find out what happens.

It’s almost time for the big cliffhanger as we enter Niki’s house again. She is just about to put Micah to bed. You know that he knows something. But what does he know? Niki thinks she sees something, but goes to check and it is nobody. We pan out, and there is DL hiding behind the corner. Minor surprise, yes, but this is Heroes, we expect more.

So, let’s check up on Hiro and Ando. Ando returns to the casino to find that Hiro hasn’t left. You knew these two were going to kiss and make up eventually. They forgive each other and Ando says that they should try and call the artist again, and then it hits me! At the beginning, future-Hiro said that Peter had to tell them where to meet. All this time, Hiro has been calling Isaac, who is clueless, but this time, Peter will be there. He will remember Hiro, and tell him where to meet! And that’s almost exactly what happens.

Isaac gets a phone call and he tells Peter that it is just a prank, but Peter knows better and picks it up. His words “My name is Peter Petrelli, and I have a message fore you.” – SAVE THE CHEERLEADER, SAVE THE WORLD

Yeah, it might seem easy, but one look at that finished painting says it might be harder than they expect.

Another great episode. The twist at the end was a little bit expected, but it was cool to see everything come together at the end. The intersection of all of the lives is just really compelling, and now we see that Nathan is corrupt and DL is coming back, it makes things even more interesting.

What did you think of the episode? Is DL going to be trouble for Niki? What will happen to Matt Parkman? Where will Peter and Hiro meet? Will the heroes be able to save Claire?