Newsgasm: Cause You Can’t See Tits on the Radio Edition

26 Comments

1. 1
   J Unit
   Posted March 24, 2006 at 10:14 am

   Isn’t it sad knowing Michaelangelo died before getting a chance to express his creativity with the inspiration of Britney’s nude form?

2. 2
   chronic
   Posted March 24, 2006 at 10:18 am

   OK, this is sculpture in the round. Obviously one is going to wonder what this thing looks like from all angles. Seriously, that cannot be a pretty sight.

   And what the eff does a bearskin rug have to do with anything. Not that I’m a member of PETA or something, but does seem a bit of an incongruous prop for something meant to celebrate “life”.

   In short, wtf x infinity.

3. 3
   stacyrocks
   Posted March 24, 2006 at 10:22 am

   I think the face on that sculpture looks more like Katherine Heigl (Izzie) from Grey’s Anatomy. About the rest of the sculpture : EW????!

4. 4
   Kat
   Posted March 24, 2006 at 10:33 am

   That sculpture is completely offensive and woman-hating. And I don’t really believe that it’s an actual pro-life monument, I think it’s a hipster’s idea of a hilarious joke. I mean, that’s what we’re all assuming, right?

5. 5
   plexitoes
   Posted March 24, 2006 at 10:47 am

   chronic (#2) wonder no more

   “…posterior view that depicts widened hips for birthing and reveals the crowning of baby Sean’s head.”

   That is disturbing to even me, someone who just gave birth 8 weeks ago and should still have those wacky hormones that would make this sorta thing seem okay. (props to Tvgasm for helping get me through bedrest).

   I thought she had a scheduled C-section anyway?

6. 6
   Molly
   Posted March 24, 2006 at 10:49 am

   As far as I know, Britney had a c-section. There was no “crowning” in Sean Preston’s birth (not to mention the bear skin rug and ridiculous positioning).

7. 7
   nocable
   Posted March 24, 2006 at 10:59 am

   Driving in car with baby out of car seat = pro life?

8. 8
   zevonia
   Posted March 24, 2006 at 11:14 am

   First of all that does not look like Britney Spears. Even if you factor in labor and stress change to the face. I am so glad the website didn’t show the back view.
   Molly- the positioning is only ridiculous from an aesthetic standpoint. It is an actual position for birthing though rarely done in the western world.
   As to Mr Quaid, he may have a good case but I doubt he’s worth $10 mil but then no actor is in my opinion.
   And I agree the Mr Cruise needs to send his theton hating persona into the closet and never come out again. So tired of the antics. Hail Xenu!

9. 9
   mandymax
   Posted March 24, 2006 at 11:40 am

   Oh, my . . .

   There are no words.

10. 10
    plexitoes
    Posted March 24, 2006 at 11:52 am

    I also love how the article says something about Brit putting “family before her career”. Of course, that’s only if its her family.

    If it is someone else’s family, *cough shar jackson cough* then it is ranked lower on the priority list. Probably right below wearing shoes in public restrooms.

11. 11
    sparky
    Posted March 24, 2006 at 12:18 pm

    I agree it’s a hoax. Considering what neighborhood it’s in, and the other art the gallery shows, and the fact that the quotes in the article are completely outrageous (like anyone has to study a “Canadian” bearskin rug for accuracy), it’s yet another chapter of the trendy ironic hipness that is life off the L train. SO worth all the time and effort…

12. 12
    EdHill
    Posted March 24, 2006 at 12:19 pm

    Actually its conceptual art. Since the pictures on the website avoid showing us the “money shot” from behind, we’re left to conceptualize in our head what her cooter looks like.

    Trust me, I went to art school.

13. 13
    Tabby Lavalamp
    Posted March 24, 2006 at 12:20 pm

    Sooooooo many things!
    I had to stop reading the Britney article because my eyes were hurting from rolling so much. However, wouldn’t most pro-life people also have issues with representations of nudity? I know I’m just generalizing here, but still…
    I think they should also commission a companion piece showing Ms. Spears driving with her baby on her lap, being the pro-life heroine that she is.

    Randy, Randy, Randy. It was a movie about two gay cowboys. It’s fantastic that it was a hit, but really, how could the producers have expected it to be? Considering how many movies don’t perform as well as they expect them to (King Kong), expecting Brokeback to be a huge hit would have been unrealistic at the time.

    I refuse to discuss Tom Cruise.

14. 14
    DickeyD
    Posted March 24, 2006 at 12:41 pm

    Hey, I have some news for you… 24 POST!!!! sorry if im being imposing but im tres excited about this particular episode because I called that twist since episode two!! I am really sorry for being so impatient but GAHH 24!!

15. 15
    Shollia
    Posted March 24, 2006 at 12:58 pm

    Good lord.. that statue is freakin hideous.
    There is nothing motherly.. nothing beautiful about a pregnant woman on elbows and knees… looking like she’s ready to be pounded doggy style.
    That thing ig grotesque.

16. 16
    dredge
    Posted March 24, 2006 at 1:12 pm

    #15..precisely..that’s the point.

17. 17
    USNRNPage
    Posted March 24, 2006 at 1:33 pm

    Are we sure this isn’t of her post pregnancy?

    I would have much preferred her sculpted into Winged Victory for obvious reasons.
    Let’s just hope that the artist isn’t working on K-fed in the part of Michelangelo’s David.

    Please don’t post this crap before Happy Hour.

18. 18
    hog island
    Posted March 24, 2006 at 2:05 pm

    Nice Scissor Sisters reference

19. 19
    Leah3t
    Posted March 24, 2006 at 2:38 pm

    Does anyone know if Britt Britt has released a statement? (or submitted a bid to buy? This looks about her decor style, from what i’ve seen in ‘in touch’)

20. 20
    QCB
    Posted March 24, 2006 at 5:52 pm

    This is totally off topic, but has anyone seen this??

    http://walken2008.com/

    And if so, WTF? Is this real?

21. 21
    Commander Appo
    Posted March 25, 2006 at 6:43 pm

    (commenting on above) That’s hilarious!

22. 22
    Tabby Lavalamp
    Posted March 25, 2006 at 11:33 pm

    No, Walken is NOT running for president. That site is satire.

23. 23
    KatiesHole
    Posted March 26, 2006 at 2:59 pm

    I do not understand this country’s fascination with that white trash, beat down, ragged out, filthy hillbilly skank Spears! Now, some nutcase makes a pregnant statue of her? Disgusting.

    ” Puts family before her career” she says? What career? It should say, “Puts family through a car windshield”.

    She has offered nothing to pop culture or the music industry, ever.

    Her endless ridiculous antics are analyzed and brought to the our attention, and for what reason? To what end? It is an outrage.

    I won’t this disease to fade away.

    KH

24. 24
    Commander Appo
    Posted March 26, 2006 at 3:28 pm

    KatiesHole wrote:
    “I won’t this disease to fade away.”

    But isn’t it best to let sleeping dogs lie, or something?

25. 25
    zevonia
    Posted March 26, 2006 at 8:24 pm

    KatiesHole, I agree with you completely. Further reflection on the statue at the news website leads me to believe it isn’t even Britney. I think the artist couldn’t get anybody to pay attention to his statue so he claimed it was Ms Spears so everyone would go “ooh” and “ahh”. Since baby Sean was not even born naturally this makes more sense. The gallery’s art director said the bear skin was traditional but who’s taken naked pictures of their kid on a bear skin in the last 50 years? What a bunch of tools.

26. 26
    KatiesHole
    Posted March 28, 2006 at 4:01 am

    I suspect that we will see Britney in this position when she tries to jump start her career, when the secret sex tape makes it way to the internet…just like our girl Jenna Lewis from Survivor…

    KH