Newsgasm: Uhhhh… Um, Well Yeah, Uhhh… Edition

Industry

By m_ruv | Wednesday, November 9, 2005 | 11:51 am | 16 Comments

  • Apparently hell hath no fury like an aimless, mumbling blowhard, as Markus of this season’s The Apprentice has been going on FOR DAYS about how the show’s editing has made him look like an idiot. He already challenged Trump to a debate, which Trump mercifully declined. Reached for comment, Markus said, “Flame, flames… FLAMES… on the side of my face… breathing… breathless… heaving breaths… HEAVING—” [NY Daily News]
  • Jeff Probst is mulling whether to stay on as the host of Survivor, eager to move on to other opportunities but acknowledging that he’ll “never have as good a job as Survivor.” That’s for sure, unless you’re willing to show your sugar bun for Falcon Video. [AP]
  • Actor Page Kennedy, who played the mysterious man locked in Alfre Woodard’s basement on Desperate Housewives this season, was just fired from the show for “improper conduct.” Disappointingly, the misconduct did not involve another cast member. Happily, nobody cared about the basement-fugitive subplot anyway. [AP]
  • And congratulations are in order as Kirstie Alley officially is no longer a “fat actress.” Great, maybe now she can DISAPPEAR FROM THE CULTURAL HORIZON. [AP]

About

16 Comments

  1. 1
    RealityTV4Me
    Posted November 9, 2005 at 12:19 pm

    He challenged Trump to a debate?! Th-th-th-that’s all folks! FFFFFREAKIN’

  2. 2
    Christy
    Posted November 9, 2005 at 12:53 pm

    I thought Markus seemed like an idiot as well, but I couldn’t help but wonder: if he was THAT much of a tool, how did he make it as a contender at all???

  3. 3
    Lisa
    Posted November 9, 2005 at 1:19 pm

    Nooo I hope Probst stays with Survivor. It wouldn’t be the same without him.
    They should let him say what’s on his mind though! Stir crap up on the show with the contestants.
    And is that nude pic of him real? Hard to believe he’d pose nude.. and the pic does look fake.. the way the head/neck sits on the body looks wrong.

  4. 4
    Ashes
    Posted November 9, 2005 at 2:18 pm

    Excellent use of the Clue quote.

  5. 5
    Leah3t
    Posted November 9, 2005 at 2:34 pm

    I agree. more clue, more clue!!

    i am your singing telegram…..

  6. 6
    Helenann
    Posted November 9, 2005 at 2:38 pm

    Perhaps Kirstie should get Tom’s new publicist…

  7. 7
    Fuzzbait
    Posted November 9, 2005 at 2:40 pm

    ‘cuz everyone knows debating Trump is a ZERO DOLLAR INDUSTRY!!!

  8. 8
    Retroqueen
    Posted November 9, 2005 at 2:50 pm

    Your title should read:

    TVGASM: BIG DICK EDITION

    It covers all 4 stories perfectly

  9. 9
    Coconutphone
    Posted November 9, 2005 at 2:58 pm

    Genius use of the “Clue” quote. Like I wasn’t a fan enough of this site, you just stole my heart for all eternity with that quote :) Oh, and Markus is a tool.

  10. 10
    Coconutphone
    Posted November 9, 2005 at 2:59 pm

    The nude pic of Probst is a fake. It’s the same shot torso up from an EW article a ways back where he was wearing boxers. The bottom part is photochoped and then superimposed over a fake background.

  11. 11
    Ashes
    Posted November 9, 2005 at 3:04 pm

    Perhaps someday Markus will make babbling incoherently, pointlessly, and endlessly into a FORTY BILLION DOLLAR A YEAR INDUSTRY. Until then, he’s just a tool.

  12. 12
    Mike
    Posted November 9, 2005 at 6:58 pm

    They could always rename Kirstie’s show “Effing Annoying Actress.”

  13. 13
    Starlight
    Posted November 9, 2005 at 10:35 pm

    And you know about Falcon video how?

  14. 14
    m_ruv
    Posted November 10, 2005 at 5:55 am

    OMG STARLIGHT ARE YOU IMPLYING THERE ARE GAYS ON THE STAFF OF THIS SITE?!?!??!

    EWWWWWWWWW

  15. 15
    boondocksaint
    Posted November 10, 2005 at 6:20 am

    AWESOME Clue quote!! I had serious deja vu when I read that.

  16. 16
    g-dawg
    Posted November 11, 2005 at 8:49 am

    I hear that GWBush offered Markus a job as his head speechwriter.

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