TVgasm Prime Time Roundup 2006 – Friday

I sure hope that by now all of our loyal TVgasm readers have left work and are contemplating the many ways they can destroy brain cells, bathroom floors, and tooth enamel, but if you are still going to be stuck in your office or cubicle, why not take some time and read what the networks are offering you on Fridays?

NBC

8 PM : Crossing Jordan (Premieres 10/20) – “Crossing Jordan explores disturbing topical crimes and offenses with a cadre of coroners eager to offer their forensic skills to the police in order to bring murderers to justice and closure to the families of victims.” While at one time this may have been a response to CSI, it now exists mainly because there are still a lot of people who love to Jill Hennessy on television. You decide if that is enough to get you to watch.

9 PM : Las Vegas (Premieres 10/20) – “This fast-paced, sexy drama follows the elite Las Vegas surveillance team charged with maintaining the security of one of “Sin City’s” largest resorts and casinos.” Where else can you get a weekly dose of James Caan on your television?

10 PM : Law and Order (Premieres 9/22) – People who were born during the first season of Law and Order now have their own kids. In other words, it’s been around for quite a long time. It will never dominate in the ratings again, but if you ever find that you need to find something to talk about with your parents when you are home for the holidays, watching a few episodes of Law and Order is a good place to start.

ABC

8 PM : America’s Funniest Home Videos – For those of you who can’t get enough shots of toddlers accidentally hitting their fathers in the junk, look no further.

9 PM : Men In Trees (Premieres 9/15) – “A fun and sexy ensemble drama about finding love in the most unexpected places. Relationship coach and bestselling author Marin Frist feels confident that, when it comes to men, she knows what to look for, what to avoid, and what will make her happy. But after her own relationship falls apart, she finds herself stuck in a small Alaskan town.” Wow, who knew people were still willing to pay Anne Heche to be on television? But the real reason not to watch this show is they fail to mention cast member John Amos’ s legendary role playing Cleo McDowell in Coming to America in his online Bio.

10 PM : 20/20 – Dateline changed the news magazine game with “To Catch a Predator” how long will Barbara Walters stand for this without doing something about it? If you actually care about this enough to stay home and watch 20/20 on a Friday night you are A) old enough to remember the Eisenhower administration, B) recovering from season-ending knee surgery or, C) preparing to tell your parents why you’ll have to adopt their grandchildren.

CBS

8 PM : Ghost Whisperer (Premieres 9/22) – “Ever since she was a young girl, Melinda Gordon (Jennifer Love Hewitt) has been able to see and talk to dead people–earth bound spirits who have yet to cross over to the other side and who seek her help in communicating and resolving unfinished business with the living. Melinda sometimes has a hard time accepting her “gift,” especially now that she’s a newlywed and looking forward to starting her new life with her husband, Jim Clancy (David Conrad), a paramedic. Her friend and business partner in the antique store, Andrea Moreno (Aisha Tyler), is fascinated by Melinda’s talent. Although Melinda embraces her unique “abilities” as a blessing and sometimes a curse, she always helps her clients–alive or dead–find emotional closure.” Originally called Touched By An Angel: The Next Generation, this show features two of the best racks on television. And we all want to support Dartmouth alum Aisha Tyler don’t we? Of course we do.

9 PM : Close to Home (Premieres 9/22) – “CLOSE TO HOME is a legal drama that tears away the facade of suburbia to reveal that sometimes quiet and tranquil streets can hide the darkest of crimes.” I nearly fell asleep reading this description. I guess it’s better than having CSI: Suburbia.

10 PM : NUMB3RS (Premieres 9/22) – “NUMB3RS is a drama about an FBI agent who recruits his mathematical-genius brother to help the Bureau solve a wide range of challenging crimes in Los Angeles. The two brothers take on the most confounding criminal cases from a very distinctive perspective.” I actually can’t diss NUMB3RS that much. Other than the starring the annoying David Krumholz, the show does take an interesting perspective at solving crimes, and even had a guest appearance by Bill Nye the Science Guy. Add in the delectable Navi Ravat and TVgasm friend Dylan Bruno, and you have yourself plenty of reason to force your significant other to watch with you before you start your night on the town.

The CW

8 PM : Smackdown (Premieres 9/22) – “This unique, bigger-than-life two-hour extravaganza has ratcheted up the drama and intensified the classic rivalries. Featuring a recurring cast of unique WWE Superstars, “Friday Night SmackDown” presents an astonishing display of athleticism combined with riveting dramatic and comedic storylines.” Some of you may think I am joking when I say that Smackdown features one tag team group that, in lieu of steel chairs, steel ladders, or kendo sticks, pulls a little person out of from under the ring and throws him at their opponents. I assure you that I am not joking. For those of you wondering what Mike “The Miz” is doing these days, this is where to find him.

FOX

8 PM : ‘Nanny 911 (Premiered 9/8) – “When your kids are full of trouble, help is there on the double. The British are coming on Nanny 911. This new, family-oriented, unscripted series follows an experienced Head Nanny and her team of “specialist” nannies, who know that it takes more than a spoonful of sugar to get unruly tykes in line.” I can at least get half a chub for Supernanny Jo Frost. The same cannot be said for Nannies Deb, Stella, or Yvonne. Should that prevent you from watching this show? I don’t know, but it’s something to think about.

9 PM : Trading Spouses: Meet Your New Mommy (Premieres 10/6) – “The switch is on. two totally different families are trading one parent for one week. New house. New kids. New life. Each family receives $50,000 but what they don’t know is that the new mommy will decide how they’ll spend their money. ls the grass really greener on the other side? Let’s find out.” Don’t worry, Wifeswap doesn’t sound that interesting either.