It’s a Wonderful Life – PSYCH!

Recaps

By DearCrabby | Tuesday, December 25, 2012 | 6:00 am | 12 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , ,
Posted in: Christmas Specials, Featured, Recaps

George says he gave Taxi Driver the loan based on character. I wish I could use that excuse with Visa. Potter’s all like, moron, get some collateral next time, and make sure it isn’t a useless taxi from 1906. “I guess if you shoot pool with someone at the Building and Loan, you can borrow money,” Potter says. Yeah, that’s how it works nowadays too, just ask those banks that got the bailout from their friends in Congress!

Cutting to the chase, the board says they won’t sell out to Potter on one condition – George stays on as Executive Secretary. George says he’s leaving! Leaving for school dammit! He tells them Uncle Billy’s their man, because if there is one thing a financial institution needs is someone who has to tie string around his fingers to remember things. The board member tells George if he doesn’t stay, they’ll vote with Potter. Son of a bitch!

Life 122209-19.JPG

Just when you think you’re out, the pull you back in!

Clarence says he knows George didn’t go to school but instead stayed on. Loser! George gave Harry his college fund so he could go off to college. Don’t the youngest of the family always get everything they want? The answer to that is yes.

Harry went off to college and became a football star. George waited around four year for Harry to come back and take over the Building and Loan so he could now head off to college as the oldest freshman in the history of the world. George and Uncle Billy are at the train station waiting for Harry while George looks through a bunch of travel brochures. Keep dreamin’ bitch.

Harry jumps off the train but he’s not alone – he brought his wife! George is like bwa-huh? Exactly. George shakes new wife Ruth’s hand and is all excited to have a sister-in-law until she mentions that her father offered Harry a job. Rut-roh, wrench in the works! Harry tells George he hasn’t decided to take it and he knows George has been holding things down at home. “I won’t let you down, George.” Yes you will. George’s face tells us he knows it too.

Life 122209-20.JPG

Feel that breeze? That’s your hopes and dreams
blowing away from you!

George asks Ruth if the job is good. Her dad owns a glass factory and he wants to get Harry started in research. On glass? Oh brother, it’s probably Pyrex or Dow Corning or something. It’s turning out to be a sucky life, huh George?

As an aside, I can’t wait until the recession is over so Old Navy can start hiring humans for their ads.

Back at the Bailey house, everyone is celebrating except George who throws his travel brochures on the ground. Ma Bailey comes out of the house and mentions that Mary is back from college. It’s the 1930s, why would she need book learnin’ and schoolin’? Just get married and live repressed lives like all the other women back then. And sometimes now.

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18

A Food Network host wannabe and travel fanatic (only three more continents to go!) , Dear Crabby lived in Chicago for over 10 years before returning to her native Ohio. She loves black martinis, blue cheese burgers, and The Daily Show. A two-time Chicago marathon finisher, she heartily dislikes Smokey Smokersons, slow drivers in the passing lane, and noisy children, especially when they ruin a fine dining experience or a trip to Target. A nouveau spinster, Dear Crabby spends her free time with her Cocker Spaniels and often goes by the pseudonym “Mrs. Clooney.”

12 Comments

  1. 1
    pixielated
    Posted December 23, 2009 at 1:58 pm

    Oh, Crabby, hilarious as usual.

    But didn’t you know that banks don’t have the money that you deposited? It’s kind of like a Ponzi scheme: they trust that not everybody is going to want to get their money out at the same time, so they will have enough to cover the people who do. That’s also what FDIC (Federal Deposit Insurance) is for, to protect people from bank runs and failures. And don’t ever ask about checking!

    Merry Christmas!

  2. 2
    fire@will
    Posted December 23, 2009 at 6:08 pm

    If the Potters (less Harry) had prevailed, we would not be in the financial mess we’re in today.

    Great (fun) recap, but it seems to be missing at least one page (I only get 12)…

  3. 3
    hutchlover
    Posted December 23, 2009 at 7:15 pm

    Pixie’s got the right idea, but prior to the stock market crash (v. 1.0), there was no FDIC. That was one of the things created by the stock market crash (v. 1.0) once Roosevelt (v. 2.0) got into office.

    I love these Christmas recaps, but I must say that this is one of the best Christmas movies ever. Don’t ask me why since it’s so depressing.

  4. 4
    dearcrabby
    Posted December 24, 2009 at 5:57 am

    Yes, one page seems to be missing! I will work on it when I get home from my own soul-sucking savings and loan job, hahaha!

  5. 5
    whoochile
    Posted December 24, 2009 at 6:10 am

    Crabby, you are hysterical! This recap is gold. I’ve never been a fan of this movie, it never clicked for me and now I know why!!! You totally pointed out all the things that don’t really make any sense.
    Can’t wait for page 13.

  6. 6
    ohionancy
    Posted December 24, 2009 at 10:20 am

    I love this movie & your recap was great but I can’t wait for the last page. No matter how many times I’ve seen it when that brother makes his toast at the end I cry every time – I may cry now thinking about it – I’m such a wuss!

    I think it’s hilarious your Potter/Dick Chaney analogy. During the inauguration when Chaney was in the wheelchair all I could think of was “he looks like Old Man Potter”

    Just as a trivia tidbit – the Jew Mary was talking to at the dance was Alfalfa from the Little Rascals.

    Have a great holiday!!

  7. 7
    pixielated
    Posted December 24, 2009 at 7:00 pm

    Yeah, hutchlover, I know that the FDIC didn’t exist until after the Depression. Also, before the FHA, HUD, etc., ordinary people could not get mortgages unless there was a building and loan company in their town.

    Fire@will probably thinks those were the GOOD old days. When poor people knew their places.

    And the reason we are in the mess we are now is BECAUSE of people like Potter, or his lookalike Dick Cheney, who got us into this wonderful war that was supposed to give us an endless supply of cheap oil and enrich Halliburton immeasurably (well, it did do that).

  8. 8
    thatswhatshesaid
    Posted December 25, 2009 at 8:54 pm

    This was hilarious! I love you!!! “Is that Jerry’s Puffy Shirt?” Great line! I enjoyed this movie the one time I saw it, but I was confused by a lot of things. Your recap pointed out a lot of the same things, so I’m glad it wasn’t just me. Thanks for the good work! Can’t wait for page 13!

  9. 9
    Tvsnarkeling
    Posted December 28, 2010 at 1:06 pm

    Love the recap with such a Republican spin. No wonder this will never be shown on a FOX channel

    The taxi drive an cop (on pg 4)are named Bert and Ernie. Cracks me up everytime I hear it

  10. 10
    hutchlover
    Posted December 28, 2010 at 3:58 pm

    TVsnarkeling, Bert & ERnie from Sesame Street were named after B&E from “It’s a Wonderful LIfe”.

  11. 11
    hot cawfee
    Posted December 26, 2012 at 6:53 am

    One of my most fave movies ever!!!! I cry at the beginning when everyone is praying for George esp. the kids. I cry when Mary whispers “Geoerge Bailey I’ll love you till the day I die”
    sigh………back to reading

  12. 12
    Aunt Dorsey
    Posted December 30, 2012 at 2:54 am

    I always hated that movie, bunch of treacle. Enjoyed your re-cap much more.

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