George finally gets to Mary’s house and seems to have trouble deciding on whether or not he wants to come in. What adorable banter, snore. Mary turns on the victrola to play “Buffalo Girls” and she puts a picture of George lassoing the moon on an easel. What a weird girl. George is in no mood for nostalgia.
Did she commission that? Or is it a real Picasso?
Mary’s mother asks what George is doing there and Mary yells up the stairs, “He’s making violent love to me, Mother!” Wow, that seems very HBO for this era. Her mother reminds her that Sam Wainwright is going to call her later, then Mary and George get into a huge fight over nothing (get used to that if you get married) and George leaves. Mary smashes the record Keith Moon-style and answers the phone.
George returns because he forgot his hat and Mary totally plays up the call with Sam. “Hee-ha HELLO SAM,” she says. Knock off that hee-ha bullshit already! Mary’s tone makes George jealous and Mary tells Sam he’s there. Sam wants to talk with the both of them (“Hee-ha, put him on!”), so they have to squish close together to listen on the same ear thingy.
We cut over to Sam being massaged by a woman in a fur as he asks George if he’s trying to steal Mary from him. You’re a total two-timing douche, Sam. Mary begins to cry a little as they listen in to what Sam is saying. He wants them to invest in soybeans! Or his pyramid scheme! I’m not really sure.
Mary and George are listening but keep stealing looks at each other as Sam tells them his get-rich-quick scheme. Mary looks at George, George looks at Mary, drops the phone, grabs her violently and shakes her like a newborn while he screams he doesn’t want to work in plastics or for Sam or for the man or get married and Mary starts to cry because clearly George is nuts. Then he hugs her passionately and kisses her face. Schexy!
Sometime later, Mary and George come running down the stairs of Ma Bailey’s house after getting married and Mary throws the bouquet – don’t catch it! It’s a trap! They head outside where it is pouring down rain and take off in the “Just Married” taxi. They begin to make out and the taxi driver says, “If either of you two see a stranger around here, it’s me.” How about some shut the hell up with your wedding cake?
Suddenly the taxi driver sees some commotion and stops the cab. Something ain’t going right at the Building and Loan, per usual, and my first question is why did George and Mary get married on a weekday since I’m assuming the banks weren’t open on the weekends back then – even so, why wouldn’t they have closed for George’s wedding?