Jersey Shore: Dr. AssMan

Recaps

By Honey Gangsta | Tuesday, February 8, 2011 | 6:00 am | 31 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Featured, Jersey Shore, Recaps

Let’s start this episode off right – at Karma.  Jwoww and Sammi are “hugging it out” after their sudden ceasefire.

Jwoww Sammi love.js.2.3.11“Remember when you yanked out my weave?”

Then Ronnie comes up and steals a shot that belongs to Jwoww.  Sammi seems to be super annoyed with Ronnie, which is nothing new.  This time it looks like she wants him to stop drinking.  He tells the camera that as usual, he and Sammi take “one step forward, two step backs.”  They need to take a few hundred “step backs” to their hometowns and spare us all the misery.

Sitch is trying to lure a girl home with the promise of a t-shirt she can wear.  This seems to be his new schtick.  If he can get them to put on his clothing then somehow they are more DTF.  I have to point out here, too, that this girl is not attractive.  After all the grenade horn blowing I would have expected more from Sitch.  His beer goggles must be extra thick this evening.

Sitch carries grenade.js.2.3.11This grenade isn’t even coming willingly.

Once home, the grenade gets a purple t-shirt that says “Situation” on it, Ronnie face plants onto a bean bag while Sammi tries to force feed him, and Snooki passes out in the makeshift dog run.

Snooki dog run.js.2.3.11This dog just became the victim of a home invasion.

Ronnie has really done himself in and instead of eating the food Sammi brings him, he pukes into a shopping bag.  By now they’re up in their room, where Sitch is incidentally trying to make some progress with his grenade.  Sammi gets totally grossed out by her hot awesome boyfriend puking all over their bedroom.  The next morning Jwoww ever-so-kindly drags Snooki from the dog run into her bed.  Remember how Snooki was going to stop drinking except for the occasional glass of pinot?  Yeah, so much for that.  Meanwhile, Ronnie is pooping blood.  Clearly this isn’t normal so Sammi agrees to go to the doctor with him to find out what is wrong.  They go to a general practitioner who tells Ronnie he’s just going to “check out the area” to see what’s up.

This next section is pretty amusing with cuts between Ronnie enduring a manual exploration of his burning back door and Sammi sitting cluelessly happy in the lobby, picking at her nails and listening to elevator music.

Ronnie doctor.js.2.3.11Open wide, Ronnie.

Sammi doctor.js.2.3.11“Ronnie is so dreamy.”

At the end of the visit the doctor has told Ronnie that he needs to scale back the drinking and his butt will stop bleeding.  I’ve never heard of such a thing so I looked it up and it seems that excessive drinking over a long period of time can cause damage to internal organs, including the lining of your intestines, which may result in anal bleeding.  Good grief, isn’t Ronnie in his 20’s?  He’s already drunk so much that his colon is shredded and bleeding?  This can’t be good.  Sammi wants to know if any clamps were used in the exam.  LOL.

The next segment is a little reel of antics from the Jwoww and Snooki show.  They take Deena and head for the drug store, discuss masturbation on the way, then in the store Snooki rides around on a tricycle until it breaks.  I’ve seen much better from these two… yawn.

Snooki tricycle.js.2.3.11Not redeeming herself.

Later Snooki and Deena tell a freshly groomed Pauly D that he looks super hot and they’d like to have a threesome with him.  Didn’t we already play this game with Sitch?  New material please, ladies.  Some friends of Ronnie’s will be joining the roommies out at Karma where Ronnie will hopefully be making an effort to give his rectum a break.  These friends are named Petey and Dario, and Deena takes a liking to Dario, who kisses her even though she has cigarette breath.  Sitch is in one of his usual spots, underneath some sort of raised platform waiting for a drunk girl to topple off of it and land on him so he can take her home and convince her to put on his lounge wear.  Snooki has come across a bona fide Italian guido who is paying attention to her and telling her she’s beautiful.  There’s some disgusting tongue kissing and Snooki proudly announces that she’s bringing this one home with her.

SIDEBAR:  As all the roommies are filing into the house with their catches of the evening, I keep noticing how oddly shaped Snooki’s body is.

Snooki leopard print.js.2.3.11“Hurry up, jerk-off.”

She seems little, but then she wears these super tight dresses that hug her entire upper half and make her look like a tangerine with toothpicks for legs.  Also, I think she must have traveled to 1987 to get those clippy things she uses to secure her poof.  I haven’t seen those in years and years unless I’m watching this show.  And they’re so fuggo and don’t go with her outfits at all.  Very confusing.

So Snooki practically races through the house with this guy – Jeff – to the smoosh room to take care of business.  They start making out and rolling around when, wouldn’t you know it.  Snooki has her period.  Foiled again!

Deena is outside on the patio sitting on Dario’s lap and talking about how she’s fat and needs to go to the gym.  Oh the conversations these people have with their prospects are so cerebral.  As Deena takes Dario to her room to “cuddle – that’s all,” we see her giving this emphatic speech to the camera about how it’s not Halloween and she’s not giving out treats for free.  You need a golden ticket to get into her drawers!  Then we flash to morning and she’s saying to the camera, “Whatever, my golden ticket was taken.  But it is what it is and Dario’s a good guy.”  Really Deena, just drop the Halloween/golden ticket speech.  It will save you a lot of embarrassment.

Snooki has changed into some OTHER leopard print house dress thing with her giant green slippers and is taunting Jeff (who is still here) to do some tricks for her on the stripper pole.  He finally does and of course rips it right out of its stand and falls to the ground.  It’s actually pretty funny, even if totally predictable.

Stripper pole fall.js.2.3.11Who wants a private dance?

So Snooki is totes in love with Jeff.  She kisses him a lot and then says, “Yum!” Ew.  And I never thought about it until you guys started talking about it in the comments, but now I’m always imagining her all unshowered and smelly.  Like last night’s nasty club smell, you know?  And cigarettes.  Anyway, they head for the boardwalk together and on the sky ride Snooki FINALLY realizes (after making out all night) that Jeff has a tongue ring, so now she’s even more excited about him.

sky ride.js.2.3.11“Hey you also have teeth… and hair!”

When he admires the ocean she says she hates the ocean because it’s full of whale sperm, which makes it salty.  She then admonishes all of us to google this.  Trust Snooki, okay?  The reason the ocean is salty is because it’s full of whale sperm.  What is the matter with her?  At this point I hope for her sake that she’s joking.  It must hurt to be that stupid.

Their next stop is at a bar where Jeff proceeds to tell Snooki his entire life story.  Bad idea, especially because it includes a previous engagement.  When he says he was engaged Snooki totally freaks out, wanting to know if he’s still engaged.  Jeff handles it all wrong, trying to back pedal, saying it was more like a promise ring than an engagement.  Oh please.  Snooki is now certain that Jeff also has children… and an STD.  And STD?  Where did that come from?  He wasn’t a male prostitute, he was engaged… to one person… who was a virgin.  He keeps insisting it was a promise ring and Snooki loves promise rings, so Jeff says he’ll get her one in a couple of months.  Shut up Jeff.  And shut up Snooki.  She thinks that because Jeff has been engaged in the past he obviously wants to marry her too, and she’s just not ready to get married right now.  Um, they met LAST NIGHT. He even said he was with his ex for like three years.  But Snooki is not risking any accidental matrimony and she sends Jeff on his way.

But Jeff isn’t ready to give up just yet and he calls Snooki on the duck phone to tell her so.  Snooki insists that she’s angry Jeff didn’t give her this information sooner.  What?  He gave it within 24 hours of meeting you, Snooki.  And it’s part of his past – he didn’t have to tell you at all.  She tells us she doesn’t want someone who’s been married or engaged, she wants someone fresh.  Something tells me that Karma isn’t the place to be rounding up “fresh” guys.  But I guess as long as they’ve never made a major commitment to a woman, that’s as fresh as Snooki wants.

The phone rings again and this time Pauly D picks it up and does this soft calm voice imitating voice mail, saying there’s no one available to take the call and to leave a message after the beep.  Then he holds down one of the buttons to fake the beep – and Jeff starts leaving a message!

Pauly D surprised.js.2.3.11Pauly D’s new career is born.

After Jeff talks for a minute Pauly D goes, “For Snooki press one.  For Jenni press two.”  HA!  And Jeff pushes something!  This is freaking hilarious.  Pauly D is really tickling my funny bone this season.  Next Jeff calls back and Pauly D answers like it’s a pizza place.  Jeff asks for an apology pizza to be delivered to Snooki.  Pauly D says “She doesn’t want to talk to you right now, broo.  You did her dirty, dog.  You better send roses to the house, feel me?  Roses, dog, with pickles!  Fried pickles!”  And he hangs up again.  That was cute, but the voice mail thing was the highlight of tonight’s epi.  Loving you, Pauly D!

Later all four of the girls all plan an outing to the sex store.  Seriously?  They must be bored.  There’s one interesting moment where Deena is headed for the dressing room carrying an outfit to try on and she runs into Jwoww, who is trying on the same outfit.  Deena is immediately deflated because she knows there’s no way she’ll even come close to looking as good as Jwoww does in this leather getup.  Wah wah.

slutty outfits.js.2.3.11“I’ll trade you your body for this Hustler hat…”

Snooki looks like a tangerine wearing a baseball outfit.

Snooki baseball.js.2.3.11“I look so hot right now. Who wants to sleep with me?”

The guys are home cleaning and making dinner and this puts them in a very bad mood.  Well boys, now you know how your mothers feel.  Ronnie gets all up in Sammi’s face about it when the girls get home and she points out (quite fairly) that she just helped him through a night of vomiting and anal bleeding and now he’s mad that she didn’t clean out the fridge.  Yeah Ronnie, you might want to shut it.  Dinner is super tense because Ronnie is completely mad at Sammi for whatever reason today.  These two are such a mismatch (newsflash, I know).  They obviously can’t stand each other.  And they’re at that age where they think it’s normal to fight this much in a relationship – I know, I had one of those.  It’s so amazing when you find a good relationship and look back on the one you tried so hard to make work when it was just so wrong.  The juxtaposition sheds a brand new light on everything.  So anyway, they’re miserable and they’re making everyone else miserable.  Same old, same old.

Oh good the girls have a shift of annoying Danny this afternoon.

Danny checks time.js.2.3.11“You guys were on the schedule yesterday.”

When they file in he tells them that they’re two hours late and none of them are wearing their work shirts.  Good luck with that, Danny.  Snooki tells him to take a Xanax and that’s probably the closest thing to cooperation he’s going to get.  Snooki and Jwoww get to talking about boys and Snooki is jealous that Jwoww can always find a man and she can’t.  Well you found one Snooks, but you were mad that he had a life before he met you, so there you go.

When they come home Sammi straightens her hair for four hours while Ronnie lies on his bed calling her names.  They toy with the idea of breaking up and I for one think it’s cruel of them to tease us like this.  I’m not getting my hopes up.  MVP sit in the living room listening to them fight and Vinny goes, “Hell has to be just like this.”  Sitch thinks for a minute, then nods and says, “Yeah.”  Notice that to them, hell doesn’t involve THEMSELVES fighting, it involves sitting around while Rammi fights, which as we all know is worse than any fight we could be in personally.

MVP + Deena hits Karma and Pauly D explains to us the dance move called “the Jersey turnpike,” which is apparently something Deena does constantly.  This is where she bends over in front of Pauly D and sticks her butt between his legs then kind of bounces up and down.  What a lady.  I can’t imagine why any guys would see her out and about and mistake her for Halloween, giving out free candy.

Danielle the Stalker is in attendance tonight again.  I guess we’re already going back to this well.  Pauly D says that he’s worried cause the last time he saw her she threw a drink in his face (which was kinda awesome).  But one of her friends tells Pauly D that Danielle wants to talk to him.

Danielle at club.js.2.3.11“I know what you had for dinner, Pauly. And lunch. And breakfast.”

He goes over to her with his guard up and asks her why she threw a drink in his face.  Danielle says it’s because Pauly D made her look like a stalker.  LOL.  I knew she didn’t like her edit!  But Pauly D says he doesn’t hold a grudge and invites Danielle on back to the house.   When they get there Pauly D dashes to his room and pulls out the I “heart” Jewish Girls t-shirt Danielle made for him last year while she was stalking his whole life on the boardwalk.  I find it very entertaining that not only did he keep that shirt, but that he has it right here with him and ready to put on.

Jewish girls shirt.js.2.3.11Saving it as evidence, perhaps?

When Danielle sees it she laughs and flips Pauly off.  She’s totally embarrassed and he enjoys it thoroughly.  He said that the look on her face was priceless and that’s all he wanted.  He’s quite good natured, isn’t he?

Just now, Vinny walks through the kitchen behind Danielle and as he passes her he points with both hands and goes, “Stalker!  Stalker!”  He laughs and asks her what she’s doing there.  Danielle IS pretty odd.  She wants to keep hanging around even though she knows they all think of her as the stalker.  Why wouldn’t she just act like she’s over it and get on with her life?

So a bunch of them are sitting around in the living room talking and Vinny asks what kind of bird delivers babies.  When everyone says stork, they all giggle.  This is because when people with their Jersey accents say “stork,” it sounds kind of like “stalk.”  Pauly D goes, “What did Jack climb up?  The bean what?”  Ha ha, stalk.

Danielle mocked.js.2.3.11“You guys are making fun of me? Fine, I’ll stay all night.”

Danielle sits and takes it for a while longer then decides to make her exit and she and Pauly D part amicably.  I’m guessing this won’t be the last we see of her.

During the last three minutes of the episode Ronnie and Sammi fight and break up.  It’s not even worth talking about.  We’ll see what happens next week.  It looks – again – like Sammi goes home.  Fool me once, MTV.

So there you have it!  It looks like someone is once again “Snookin for love” and in all the wrong places, I might add.  Pauly D is adorable, and Rammi are of course unforgivable.

What’d you guys think?

Thanks for reading!
-Honey Gangsta

Late one afternoon in 2005, Honey Gangsta received an invite to join a two person blog set up by her former roommate who had recently ditched LA (California knows how to party) for the bright lights of NYC (these streets will make you feel brand new, the lights will inspire you). The purpose of the blog was to continue their nightly ritual of ripping on reality TV, which could no longer be done in person. Since Honey Gangsta was still watching 18 hours of TV a day and had nothing else to do, she agreed. 10,000 hits later, HG was inspired to submit a Bachelor recap to TVgasm - no one was reporting on Officer Mayo and his time traveling DeLorean - and the rest is history. It's been said that she writes what you're thinking. It's been said she is a genius - a Blogger Laureate of her time. It's also been said that the earth is flat and no one landed on the moon, so you just never know. With her keen observations, and colorful commentary, Honey Gangsta is beloved the world over.

31 Comments

  1. 1
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 6:22 am

    So because I have nothing else to do with my life I went back and watched the aftershow that premiered while the Miami show was still airing but the gang was in Seaside. This is the episode where Sammi finds out about what Ronnie was doing while in Miami. Every thing about the ceasefire makes so much more sense now.

    So in essence MTV did show us how Sammi found out about Ronnie’s ways in Miami just not in the traditional way…

    I will go back and read the recap now…

  2. 2
    dazzyfresh
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 6:42 am

    Loved the recap…basically Pauly D saved the episode, because he has natural humor as opposed to Vinny who just is looking right now, um, like an idiot.

    Did you see Deena’s face when you mentioned it was deflated–it was the ‘B***h, imma CUT you like a Halloween pumpkin’ face…thank MTV, for keeping the camera on her just enough to witness that

    However, shame on you for showing the Rammi saga…if Sammi asks one more time ‘do you want to break up?’, im going to send Big Bertha with the crooked eye down to Seaside to pummel her…actually, i’ll get her to kill Ronnie as a freebie (im sure Gasmi’s are in support of this!)

  3. 3
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 6:55 am

    Great recap Honey G…

    Did Snooks period come on during the shenanagins?!?!?! Why run to the smoosh room if you can’t smoosh?!?!?! That was weird to me.

    The scene with Deena and Dario irritated me because I hate when people fish for compliments. When you fish for them they aren’t genuine so why do you want that.

    Snookie!!! Why are you dumping a guy who thinks you are beautiful, decent looking and likes you all because he WAS engaged. At the very least you know that he is willing to commit. Then at least you wouldn’t have to whine to Jenni about how she can find a man so quickly and you can’t.

  4. 4
    HUH?
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 8:37 am

    Isn’t this Jeff guy that Snookie dumped the one that she was in all the mags with? The one that like proposed to her on the cover of a random mag? There is much more to their relationship than this one night/day.

    Also, Classydrunk…. I agree…why go to the smoosh room knowing you aren’t gonna smush. Odd.

  5. 5
    Jess Chapman
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 9:11 am

    I’m the first to call Sammi annoying under any circumstnace, but what was Ronnie’s deal this ep? Can’t he just say he’s in a bad mood and he needs some time to chill by himself? Always work for me . . . but then again, neither I nor my boyfriend is a roid-raging asshole with multiple substance abuse problems.

    Also, Snooki was photographed with a guy named Jeff for a short time over the summer, so we should be seeing more of him soon enough. Love what Pauly told him on the phone. I sometimes wish he were gay; he’d make the perfect gay best friend for the girls.

  6. 6
    considerthis
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 9:36 am

    Whatever discomfort Ronnie felt during the anal probe is no match for the agony he and Sammi have put the viewing public thru for 3 seasons. To equate, the good Dr. would have to have shoved a razor blade encrusted basketball up his ass with a blowtorch. Enuf already!

    Must be a slow summer at Seaside if they are resorting to bringing Danielle/Stalker back and having the gals take field trips to pharmacies and sex shops (Yawn).

    I too have cringed/gagged/threw up in mouth a little about the hygene factor (or lack there of) in that house. Housekeeping aside the fact that Snooki after a night a clubbing sleeps in a 2×2 dog pen complete with piss pads and turds around her, pops up same clothes no brush/toothbrush and out the door she goes for a day of booze induced sweaty fun in the sun. With that amount of cheese u know she’s a Packers fan. Silkwood Shower STAT for SNOOK! GROSS…

  7. 7
    HereGoHellCome
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 10:29 am

    I think Snookie totally over reacted with Jeff – she was so rude to him for no real apparent reason (or did I miss something other then him telling her he used to be engaged) she reacted as if he told her he was married for 10 years with 2 kids…anyhooo, I have to agree with the hygiene comment – @HG, you said she had a different leopard print thing on after her romp with Jeff, but I got the impression that it was the same one…but I cant be sure (ugh and those slippers, I can’t imagine the amount of bacteria on those things)

  8. 8
    HereGoHellCome
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 10:34 am

    HG – just looked at your screengrabs, I guess it is a different get-up…but still Eww. Great recap btw…

  9. 9
    kdognatl
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 10:36 am

    Hilarious recap as always HG! But I was dying to hear your thoughts on the Rammi fight. It was so ridonk. Sammi’s whiny voice, I need closure. @ Jess, Ronnie was being a bitch, but he did tell Sammi it was not her and he needed some space. I remember thinking she needs to freakin relax. She is really insecure. On another note, saw a tabloid photo of Deena, Sammi and Teen Mom Macy going out to dinner together. Interesting clique…….

  10. 10
    Cappy
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 10:40 am

    Once again Honey G., sooooo hilarious. Somehow you are able to make this show so much more funnier then it really is!

  11. 11
    jayem
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 11:38 am

    I love Pauly D. He does seem really chill. I always wanted him and Jenni to hook up cause I think they’d be a cute little couple. She seems really chill too.

    Ronnie must have told Sammi like 4 times that he just wanted to sleep/needed some space/didn’t want to talk to her. And she just sat there and badgered him to death. I don’t think there is anything this girl can do to redeem herself at this point. I just can’t figure out why he’s so into her. If anyone annoyed me as much as she seems to annoy him, I would shoot myself. No. I’d shoot them. She’s super lucky she’s on the the side of the tv.

    I used to like Snooki, but she seems a mess this season. She totally looks like she smells. Not a good look…

  12. 12
    KKHoliday
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 11:39 am

    I was so confused this episode because I thought Rammi already were broken up. I guess taking it day by day means nothing has changed. I loved what you said about being at that age where you think fighting this much in a relationship is normal. Both of them need to stop being so insecure and realize its better to be alone than together and miserable.

    Snooki is a strange person. Her face looks so bloated and old this season, kind of like a leather baseball glove. I still love her little quips but she really needs to calm down with the drinking!

  13. 13
    trkaelin
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 11:48 am

    I’ve always thought that Snooki looks like she might be a little gamey smelling also! Glad I’m not the only one. Those green slipper thingies must go!!!!! Ronnie should be used to being anally probed, his whole relationship with Sammi is one big anal probe. Ouch. Situation is just desperate. Dragging drunk women home from the club….. isn’t that how serial rapists get their start? I love Pauly D.

  14. 14
    itchy
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 12:51 pm

    I’m pretty sure anal bleeding is a sign of steroid use. As if we needed another clue to this douchebag’s secret weapon. And no doubt Sammi’s cranky all the time because he simply can’t get it up. Put yourself in her (youngish 20-something IQ-impaired) shoes: the guy can’t or won’t fuck her, no wonder she’s so needy.

    I’m thankful at least that they’re going low-key on the Sitch this season. Oh, and Pauly D is most definitely gay.

  15. 15
    itchy
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 12:54 pm

    Also, if you’re wondering what the rest of the world is doing while we’re laughing at their reality TV counterparts, I came across this hilarious forum thread:
    http://forums.steroid.com/archive/index.php/t-300859.html

  16. 16
    Yanksfan24
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 1:14 pm

    I LOL’d when HG compared Snooki to a tangerine with legs!! I always thought of her as a fire hydrant crossed with a traffic cone! If she dressed better she would look 20 lbs lighter but that’s for “What Not To Wear”, and yeah Jeff is the guy who proposed to Snooki on that magazine cover, gross. Thanks for recap HG!

  17. 17
    HereGoHellCome
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 1:19 pm

    @ itchy…that link was gross (but entertaining!) thanks! :)

  18. 18
    NotWithoutMyTV NotWithoutMyTV
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 1:21 pm

    Oh! Oh! You know what else is a symptom of steroid abuse??? Stunted emotional development! Oh, and I heard from my roommate’s sister who went to college with a bodybuilder that promiscuity is also a symptom! Over-identifying with certain Italian-American subcultures, also a hallmark of steroids! Inability to read chick’s phone numbers after 16 shots! Ronnie’s got that too!

    Holy oatmeal! Look at me! I’m a MEDICAL GENIUS.

  19. 19
    vallegirl vallegirl
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 2:36 pm

    “I used to like Snooki, but she seems a mess this season. She totally looks like she smells. Not a good look…”

    It’s like she and Jenni watched the first season and all the superficial skank that Jenni dropped landed on Snooki.

  20. 20
    someguy
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 4:04 pm

    What a freash and new episode.Every week it is something different how can they keep topping themselves. I can’t get enough of Sam and ron so interesting. How sad that sammi could not pick up a magazine while waiting for ronnie at doctor, I bet she can’t read who does.
    that. What is next a very special Pauly DJ episode. This show has jumped the shark. Same thing over and over.I hope these thirty year olds save the money.Is there another club at the shore besides Karma? nicole slepping with dogs was very true sad and tells the future. The DJ is better this year only one who seems like an ok person.Vinnie is a big douche now and the women are so damaged. These are not college kids they are old enough to know better come on anal bleeding from alcohol something is wrong.Sammi fights over nothihg what the hell did she see growing up. The most important thing in these people lives is being on TV and how they think they look and sadly all of them are so ugly once you watch them. The 15 min clock is running very fast. The end will not be pretty.
    Great recap as always I won’t watch show anymore to depressing but still love and enjoy your writing skills/

  21. 21
    Rosalind Herbert
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 5:01 pm

    O wow ^ ^ Debbie downer!! Anyways, great recap! Luv luv luv Pauly D and Jenni. I like the way Sammi talks with her hands so I just zone her out and look. I think people r taking this show way too seriously. I have been around people (college students) that act like that so it amuses me. HG u are always on point…and I read the steroid forum HIL.ARI.OUS

  22. 22
    mere2142
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 6:34 pm

    @Itchy – that link needs a warning label. But I learned so much…lol.

    I love Pauly D. He has provided the best moments this season. Snooki on her own I could do without but I do like her and Jenni when they are together. O

    Rammi – no one cares anymore. Just get off my tv already.

  23. 23
    Ivy
    Posted February 8, 2011 at 11:52 pm

    @ someguy – in Sammie’s defense, I would never pick up a magazine at the Dr’s Office. Ewww gross! I take my kindle with me and if I forget it then I guess I’d rather look dumb and twittle my thumbs than pick one of those things up. Too many sick people touch them… but your right that she probably would be the person that has to sound out all the “big” words out loud so it’s probably best that she spare anyone within hearing distance.

  24. 24
    itchy
    Posted February 9, 2011 at 1:25 am

    Snookie and Jwoww are this generation’s Abbott and Costello, except not nearly as funny.

  25. 25
    sarcasatire sarcasatire
    Posted February 9, 2011 at 10:56 am

    Alcohol, steriods…all just lame excuses. You know what really makes your anus bleed? Fisting. I’d check Sammi’s fingernails.

  26. 26
    NotWithoutMyTV notwithoutmytv
    Posted February 10, 2011 at 9:39 am

    @someguy: Sentence structure, paragraph breaks, and linear thought are cool new fads sweeping the nation. Check them out! I think you’ll like them.

  27. 27
    Tmurda
    Posted February 10, 2011 at 8:16 pm

    I really don’t understand why some of you think Sammi doesn’t know about what happened in Miami at this point. My sister tried to explain it to me too, but I don’t get it. I realize the current season was being filmed while the miami season aired, but then why did they fight 2 or 3 episodes ago? Sammi was all “I never would have done to you what you did to me, and blah blah blah” and he was all “I can only say i’m sorry so many times, and blah blah blah” I mean, is the miami thing not what they were talkng about? And they don’t even have a tv there to watch it. Please, someone help me out here. I guess I could just wait to see next week’s episode, but i’d rather know now. haha

  28. 28
    MichyPR
    Posted February 10, 2011 at 8:39 pm

    From what I’ve read and I think, they probably had to see the episodes to film the after shows so she probably did know about it and probably found out around that time. Tonight’s episode was intense.

  29. 29
    sarcasatire sarcasatire
    Posted February 10, 2011 at 11:01 pm

    Sammi is so annoying. It’s like no answer is good enough..she keeps looking for other methods of conviction.

    Ron: “I’m done.”
    Sammi: “You’re done?”
    “Yea..I’m over it. Done.”
    “Done, done?”
    “YES!”
    Well, if you’re really done, then look me in my eyes and says it.”
    *Ron looks into her eyes* “I’m done.”
    “Okay, but I need a reason why you’re done. I’ve done nothing wrong.”
    “Because you’re annoying and we’re always arguing.”
    “Well, let’s talk about being done.”
    “WHY?!”
    “I need closure.”
    “Like what?”
    “Like a notarized letter from a Congressman outlining the details of your doneness.”
    Ron: “Ok, consider it done.”

    Hours later..Sammi crawls into bed with Ronnie. “I’m sorry”, she purrs. “I love you, and fighting between us..is done.”

  30. 30
    Snootchy Bootches
    Posted February 11, 2011 at 4:03 am

    @sarcas – is that why Sammi was picking her fingernails while waiting in the doctor’s office? Trying to get rid of the evidence?

  31. 31
    sarcasatire sarcasatire
    Posted February 11, 2011 at 11:06 am

    Yes, Snootchy, exactly!

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