In the cab on the way home, Deena is drunkenly babbling and Ron and Sam seem over it. I think they should have made it home before Sammi said anything, but she clarifies that Ron said Deena talks about herself too much. Fight!!!!! She melts down, wants to go home, it’s nothing you’ve not seen before. In life, it happens all the time that a drunk girl loses it over something stupid. On Jersey Shore this season, it’s just how Deena do. She wants to go home, and I vote yes. get her off this island. More coconuts for Jenni.
In the morning, Paula calls and Mike manages to think that he’s headed off her friends’ reports. She’s dumber than Deena if that’s possible. Proud of himself, he heads out with the VP of MVP to a diner. Cool enough, they show the gawking crowd. One of them has a unique stare, just for Pauly D. It’s like she’s boring into his soul with her deep stare. he tries to imitate it in confessional, but honestly it’s pretty creepy. Why does he have the stalkers? Is it because he’s so loud that it’s easy to trail him???
Remember Pauly’s hot Israeli stalker from Season One? Times have changed, haven’t they?
Instead of GTL with the boyz, Ron hangs with the girls. The morning starts with Deena talking about her hemorrhoids, and Sammi asking if it’s bleeding. If you feel like making a donation to my therapist, personal message me, okay? I think this is the year she’s finally going to get that vacation in Fiji pulled together. Honestly though, between GTL with MVP, and day drinking with Sammi, Deena, and Ron, I choose….. Hmmmm…. I choose… The Party Bus of Death.
Snooki’s home in her little Troll Hole, and I actually do hope Jenni’s in there with her, like hanging out and reading Allure or something. I picture them chilling during down time from filming. She’s not a natural in the kitchen, and I can relate. It’s hard. I never know if it’s going to go well or not. She’s got a ton of ingredients and seems to be actually cooking, not just heating up Trader Joe’s foods. I’ll respect that. She has to call her dad, but still, I’m having another rare moment of being okay with a segment of this show.
Soon after, I’m back to being appalled, when we get back to Sammi, Ron, and Deena’s Day Drinking Adventure, to find it’s now 8 pm and Sammi’s ready to shower up for the club later. Their livers must gently weep all day long, and well into the night, day in and day out. Sammi doesn’t think she should be responsible for Deena, and that Deena is perfectly fie to Meatball it up on her own. Deena wouldn’t think of going home to shower, because Meatballs are greasy and gross. I think she thinks she is an *actual* meatball. Like the food. As Sammi and Ron leave, Deena does shots alone and puffs on her cig in the dusky sunset.