Jersey Shore Recap: Great Meatballs of Fire, aka There’s Still Nobody Watching

Recaps

By SunnySideup | Friday, November 2, 2012 | 2:32 am | 8 Comments
Posted in: Jersey Shore, MTV, Recaps

Back at the house, the duck phone is a popular character tonight.  It quacks to life and Sammi picks up none other than Deena’s angry mother.  Her mom is pissed that Deena’s out drinking again.  Sammi kind of side-steps this, saying that Deena wouldn’t come back with them and that she doesn’t know if Deena’s wasted.  Well.  Kind of.  Maybe.  It’s not Sam’s job, and Deena said she didn’t want to go back, so Sammi is right here but there’s no way Deena’s mom would see it that way.  Sammi knows it and is feeling a little bad.  These kids aren’t you or me.  They have security around them 24/7 when they’re filming.  It’s not like if you leave your girl at the bar alone.  It’s like if you leave your girl at work alone.  

Snooki could have been completely not involved in this episode.  She’s back home cooking still.  Gionni shows up, and she’s embarrassed to reveal dinner but he likes it.  They have a pretty cute scene, ending not as cutely when Snooki pees her chair a little.  Do the kids not know about Kegels?  Is that something you learn in college?

In the Kitchen With Snooki: The next spin-off that nobody will watch.

Deena’s wandering home, and the camera gives us a fuzzy drunk lens, but included in the background at all times is security.  Work, y’all.  She’s at work.  It’s alternate universe crap, and no wonder these people are so screwed up in general.  She gets home to a call from her angry mom.  Yikes!  

Her mom reads her the riot act, and tells her that she’s coming home.  Finally her cry for help returns to center.  She puts up no fight, and agrees she wants to go home.  The roomies are getting sick of Deena getting drunk and homesick, than loving it during the day.  Deena reeks of substance abuse on every level.  And she didn’t shower, so she probably smells like cigarettes, booze, and desperation.  So sexy.  

Vinney's Leisure Suit Guido Look

I don’t understand Vinny’s 1950s high school look at all, and he’s talking Deena into staying, but there’s something I can appreciate about his look.  I guess.  

It’s time for everyone but Deena to go to Karma; oddly, Roger is there.  I thought he wasn’t going out to the clubs anymore?  Huh.  Oh well.  Deena drunk dials Chris and whine/harasses him.  Jenni tries to regulate unsuccessfully.  Can you believe that the roommates are really, really, really over the Deena Drama?  I know!

They’re gonna do a Benefit for Seaside, and a clean-up effort.  I wonder if Deena will be able to join us via satellite from rehab???

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I'm Sunni Sideup, and I grew up in Southern Illinois nowhere near Chicago, and you know what Matt Paxton from 'Hoarders said about girls from So Ill?  "I wouldn't mess with a girl from Southern Illinois; they'll knock your teeth out."  Now I live in Tucson, Arizona and this town is my jam.  I love it.

I have no professional writing experience, but I was the Managing Editor of an All-American high school newspaper about a billion years ago.  Luckily, when you're recapping MTV shows, the jokes write themselves.      

8 Comments

  1. 1
    Valleygirl
    Posted November 2, 2012 at 10:22 am

    I’m not gonna lie, I’ve only been watching this show lately so I can see the Vinny/Pauly accidentally-coming-out-of-the-closet-together episode that we all know is imminent. The rest of it? It’s whatever. And Deena’s drunk voice is so grating.

    Save Paula! She seems like good people, I hope she makes it out of this un-Sitched. Lol.

  2. 2
    MissKris RTVfan
    Posted November 2, 2012 at 12:42 pm

    Mike was on The View recently and said he was single so Paula is obviously out of the picture. I’d also like to open a discussion as to speculation on his sobriety. He’s been going around the talk show circuit saying he is 8 months sober. But he’s been saying that for the past few months and it’s always an automatic answer to the obvious first question he’s going to get. I hope he is really sober but I sense shenanigans in his pat answers. I know this was touched on in previous recaps and comments so I’m curious to see what’s really going on with this.

    Anyway, this show has more than run its course and I’m not sad to see it gone after this season. Yes, I’m just watching to see it through to the end and no other reason. It’s certainly no longer entertaining, and Deena is just sad, pathetic, and frankly, gross. As far as the others, I agree that they are just calling it in this season. Snore.

  3. 3
    Classy Drunk Classy Drunk
    Posted November 2, 2012 at 12:49 pm

    I’m not sure why I still enjoy this show, especially since everyone else is soooooooooo over it. Oh well.

    I think people these days tend to cynics. He could not be sober, but he seems to be enjoying himself clean. He’s not like Snookie who craves a drink whilst pregnant (nothing wrong with that), but he doesn’t seem to whine or cry about having to be sober. He realizes that’s what he needed to do.

    Might he backslide…who knows, but I do hope that he stays strong.

  4. 4
    KJN KJN
    Posted November 2, 2012 at 12:55 pm

    I am a little over it, but Pauly D’s impression of his stalker last night was one of the funniest things I have seen on this show. Ever.

  5. 5
    JudgyWudgy
    Posted November 3, 2012 at 12:03 pm

    I’m right there with ya, Classy. I’m still as entertained as I ever was with Jersey Shore. There was just as much manufactured shit in season 2/3 as there is now. Sure, I can’t stand Deena, but that’s nothing new.

  6. 6
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted November 3, 2012 at 2:08 pm

    Didn’t watch last season’s JS, but with so many recommendations, I am going to have to catch up.

    Thanks guys.

    I think.

  7. 7
    Gypsy Gypsy
    Posted November 3, 2012 at 10:42 pm

    I feel like I am trudging through season 6 of the Sopranos. Just waiting for some dark, self on the famed mega ferris-wheel swing into the sunset to DMB’s first ablum.

  8. 8
    SarahRita
    Posted November 5, 2012 at 12:26 pm

    I actually enjoy this season, sure everyone is not as drunk as they have been in the past, but I enjoy seeing a different side to everyone. Mike is actually tolerable when he is sober, even though he still acts like a douche with the way he treats Paula. Vinny/Pauly D are as entertaining as always (and still my favorites). Ronnie/Sam are finally in a healthy relationship, which I am very pleasantly surprised to see. Jenni is the same, I do enjoy seeing her let loose a little more.

    Snooki seems to be taking her pregnancy seriously, and I really like her and Jionni together. However, I do get annoyed when Snooki refers to herself as being \handicap\ because she is pregnant. I know she is joking, but that is one of my pet peeves, because ultimately she chose to have the baby.

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