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Thursday, November 17, 2005
5:10 am
39 Comments
Those kids sure grow up quickly, don’t they? Talan Torriero of Laguna Beach and Kimberly Stewart of Rod Stewart’s semen are engaged to be married, according to Entertainment Tonight. This news comes just days after the two were involved in a much ballyhooed automotive accident in Hollywood. Apparently the stress and trauma of surviving a fender-bender has sent these lovers into each other’s arms for an eternal embrace of marital bliss.
In a statement to TVgasm, Ms. Stewart said, “When we hit that car, my life flashed before my eyes. And as we drove away from the scene of the crime, I suddenly realized that I really like purple. Oh look! Tin foil!”
No word from Mr. Torriero, but insiders say his impulsive romance has been developing on schedule and should dovetail quite nicely with the inevitable breakup and drug habit.
Thanks to reader Gina for pointing out the story.
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39 Comments
From L-U-V ing Taylor to proposing to skank whore, way to move up the the world Talan! Is Talan only 19? I wonder if this is a ploy to get his own reality show… Let’s take bets on how long this will last
Here’s another link from People Magazine…
http://people.aol.com/people/articles/0,19736,1131527,00.html
Wow, Kimberly Stewart just looks so used up. She looks like she’s 40 years old or so. I’ve noticed this before, but that picture of her makes my point.
Rick D.
She looks like Talan’s mom minus the implants…
Well Britney has Kevin Federline, the new Vanilla Ice, now Kimberly Stewart has Talan; soon to be the new Milli Vanilli
Please tell me this is a publicity stunt.
Maybe he’s looking to Kim’s dad for help with his singing career!!! Of all the kids on LB Talan (who seemed so nice) now always looks like a cheesy opportunist. Like he wants to be the male Nicole Ritchie. Famous for no reason at all!!
This is almost harder to believe than Katie and Tom being engaged.
And she does look like a mini-Charlene Torriero, how creepy is that. Way to go Talan!
“When we hit that car, my life flashed before my eyes. And as we drove away from the scene of the crime, I suddenly realized that I really like purple. Oh look! Tin foil!”
OMG B-Side…that was HYSTERICAL! Seriously though, should we set up a pool and bet on how long this train wreck lasts?
wow…and i thought that after the show ended we would have nothing to talk about
actually, didn’t talan just turn 20?
not that it matters, i give three months if the wedding even happens
so you can view the engagement ring and find out more about talan’s upcoming film debut in Driftwood…blah blah, what a media whore….
at http://www.perezhilton.com
Talan engaged to marry someone who looks like his mother…
Kimberly Stewart of Rod Stewart’s notoriously famous semen…
The hits just keep on comin’…
ha!
P.S. I like grapes! And purple, too! WhATEveR…
Well, thank god the gays can’t get married. That would destroy the sanctity of marriage.
Hey yall, here’s a link to a TON of photos of the Laguna gang on webshots. Enjoy~
http://community.webshots.com/album/320717484oinZVt
The future was looking so bleak for B-Side ‘Guna recap fans.
But what’s this? B-Side recapping ‘Guna Gossip?
THANK GAWD !
And heaven knows that the ‘Gunas will have their overpriviledged, underworked gobs in front of the paparazzi plenty.
keep these hilarious mini-recaps coming
I am surprised my wedding wasn’t a headline like this one. I’m positive an equal number of people gave a shit.
Ok……Good for them?
- who cares? -
does anyone else seriously FEAR kim stewarts facial structure? holy shit thats brutal! *BARFS*
Hahaha! The formal statement by Kim HILARIOUS! HAHAHA!!!
I actually thought it was real untill I got to the ‘I like purple…’ part. It really sounded like something she would say.
hahah.
And the engagment all I can say is : Oh man….
These crazy Hollywood kids. What’s with Britney and now Kim, it must be tough to be a rich young woman and find a gainfully employed young man to date. I guess guys with their own money….
I wonder how the LB crew is handling the news. I can just hear Kristin now “Like- omg Tal-ann!” Roz: “So random”
When I read about this yesterday on Yahoo, I had to quote Casey-dilla – “Are you KIDDING me??????”
Okay.. their age difference is something to talk about, but it’s more about their appearances. Talan looks so young (his baby face), and Kimberly looks so old. Now if it were Jason and Talan’s mom, it wouldn’t be a big deal!
Sad to say but Talan’s mom looks younger than Kimberly…. Bad genes… I like Rod’s music, but his face is nothing to brag about, you know!
Read this on pink is the new blog…..and I said it once but I’ll say it again.
W T F??????
Ok! First, I think the fact that they are engaged so early is crazy, since they barely know eachother. But just because they are together does not mean the whole world has to freak out. You know, the world would be a MUCH MUCH MUCH better place….If people would just mind there own business and keep there dumb, worthless remarks to themselves.
Oh by the way.. dont bother responding to my message I wrote. This will prob. be the last time I visit this gossiping ass website again anyways.. WAIT, did I just say Ass? *Gasps*!!!!!!
Okay, I think it’s a ploy…you know, to take all the attention off Paris and her dumb boyfriend. Such the friends, Talan is the butt of everyone’s joke by PRETENDING to REALLY be engaged to that skank…what’s her name!?!
Talan!!! They are using you, buddy!!!
I’m not completely surprised at this. At first I thought it was a publicity stunt. Now I just don’t know. I read from page six that Talan’s mother is really upset about the engagement. It said that she was “sobbing horribly.” It also said that they are supposed to get married in Las Vegas sometime this weekend or maybe next weekend. I’m not really sure how reliable the source is.
Talan needed to finish high school and go to college. In college they keep you distracted enough so you don’t tend to do things like marry someone you’ve known about 2 weeks at 19 years old.
This Talan isn’t too bright, but at 19 I guess, you think some things make better sense than you would think they do at say 25.
And Kim…she is probably just looking for something new to do.
And besides, what is Kim going to do? Support them with her families money?
I don’t think they are really engaged. Come on! He just graduated high school! It makes no sense! Especially when she looks old enough to be his mom.
I think that this season was even worse than the first. It was so boring i fell asleep every episode. JESSICA IS A SLUT.
Johanna – our dear Talan did NOT in fact just graduate high school…remember Kristin, Roz, and J talking the day of graduation about how he was going to get a GED? Apparently he had taken time off to work on his album (surely destined to rival masterpieces such as Sgt. Pepper and Born to Run, I’m sure). I have my doubts that he ever even got the GED though…
I think the Paris Hilton crowd just likes to pull stunts like this to see how quickly it will land them on the cover of People. It’s all a big joke to them. Like Nicky’s Las Vegas wedding, and Paris’ engagement and now this.
Anyone wanna take a stab at explaining where he could have gotten the money to buy this hag a 5 carat ring? We’re talking at least 300k. PLEASE- This kis is 19 w/ no real source of income he may be a c-list celeb right now, but I DOUBT he has that kind of cash.
I call bullsh*t.
Whitney:
Talan is just freshly 19. He turned 19 on Nov 2nd.
to the person ranting about talan not having income…. his parents are rich, therefore he has money
Talan’s parents may have money Christine, but what does that have to do with anything? Websites are saying that Talan’s mom is very upset about the engagement, so obviously she didn’t buy the ring. How does a 19 year without a highschool diploma and no major source of income afford a 5 carat ring? I think it must be a fake, or Kimberley bought it herself for the publicity…
they’re already dunzo.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20051127/ap_en_ce/people_kimberly_stewart_4
Oh darn! I thought they would last forever!!
B-side bring us the update! What possibly could have happened. I mean- this engagement made so much sense
i read that the ring was “borrowed” from a famous jeweler dude whose name i forget. neil lane, maybe?
i don’t know how you “borrow” an engagement ring, but i am guessing he probably was waiting to see what would happen first before he actually bought it. although, i think that would be using too much sense for talan, so who knows.