Goddess Quest ’06

So I think what Lost was trying to do with this episode was give some big ups to the ladiez. I thought it worked pretty well for Rousseau, and Claire came off pretty well too, though perhaps a little flakey, but Kate…not so much. Actually, at this point I just kind of feel sorry for Kate. She tries so dang hard but gets confused so easily and always ends up yelling at the wrong people and making a fool of herself. Also: Ethan!

The show opens with the little brat Aaron crying in the middle of the night, ruining everyone’s relaxing vacation. Although maybe Jin and Sun appreciate the cover noise to distract from all the heavy breathing I know is going on in their tent. Mmmm, bulgogi. Locke goes to find Jack for help with the kid, who has a rash, etc. Claire expects Jack when she hears noises behind her back on the beach, but when she turns around it’s Rousseau. Who, as far as we know, is a crazed baby killer. Rather than immediately picking up the baby, running away, and screaming at the top of her lungs, Claire decides to make some tea and have a chat.

Seriously, she just hangs out and tells Rousseau to go away. Rousseau has a gun. Claire is stupid. Claire also starts having flashbacks something fierce, which consist of medical-looking implements, an enormous syringe sticking in her pregnant belly, a young woman talking to her, and fighting with Rousseau out in the jungle, all accompanied by a voice over talking about protecting the baby.

So Kate comes to the rescue, shooing Rousseau away much in the manner one would shoo a stray dog. It’s very annoying, because they cannot make me think that Kate is a Hero, or a Strong Womyn. She’s just lame Kate, who I thought was beginning to look like Jack but then I realized they both just do the same “I am incredibly earnest and totally focused on your well being” look.

Rousseau’s big news is that there’s something wrong with the baby. Of course it is, that’s sort of her thing. Sayid: “Nice day today, but a bit humid.” Rousseau: “That’s because there’s something wrong…with the child.”

Jack has finally made it over to the beach and is examining the baby. The way he’s treating Claire here, who’s a classic freaked-out first time mom, makes me think his bedside manner had NOTHING to do with his success as a doctor. He’s pretty much being an arrogant prick. I mean, Rousseau’s word isn’t really much to go on, but he doesn’t half to treat Claire like a halfwit.

The next day, Kate and Claire decide to ask Libby to help, since she’s a shrink. Claire thinks she has amnesia, but Libby says she’s just blocking out the memories. Claire wants the memories back because she thinks she’ll be able to figure out what’s wrong with Aaron. Beh, boring setup scene. Yay, now we go to the hatch to deal with the prisoner! Jack and Locke are bringing him food, and Locke gives him a copy of “The Brothers Karamazov.” I’m not much for Russian lit; any one want to take a gander at the significance?

The prisoner isn’t all that grateful for the book and the plate of food. Can’t say I blame him. In the kitchen, Locke and Jack get all edgy with each other, with Locke needing a plan and Jack thinking any plans would just be ridiculous. Jack remarks that they keep pushing the button even though they don’t have a plan for it, which shuts Locke up because as you will recall, the button did not in fact get pushed at one juncture. I can’t concentrate the whole time anyway because Locke has just sent an entire plate of food down the garbage disposal. Seriously? Life has gotten so peachy on the island that they’re throwing food away?

Also, the prisoner shouts something from his room but I’m hard of hearing and despite watching it 5 million times I have no idea what he said. Anyway, on the beach, Libby is having a session with Claire. Libby is suddenly a hippie. She’s utilizing her best SoCal beach bum accent and it’s totally silly. It seems to do the trick for Claire, however, who is sent into a flashback in a doctor’s office where the “soothing” background music is actually creepy as hell. There’s an extended sequence where we find out that Ethan was her “doctor” while she was kidnapped (dun dun dunnnnn….). He was giving her shots, ostensibly for the baby. The scene ends with more of the mish mash of weirdness with lots of quick shots of medical stuff and baby stuff and the young woman again, who appears to have a key role in Claire’s experience. Claire comes out of it screaming about Ethan.

Claire is straight up freaking out, so Kate runs over again. Way to bring the baby into a tense situation, stupid. Kate kills me when she starts yelling at Libby like it’s her fault that Claire is upset. Where’s Ana so I can start liking Kate again?

In the woods, Eko is chopping down some trees. No shirt! Is he building a church, I wonder? He goes down to the hatch to borrow a saw, and Jack has to hide in the bathroom with the prisoner. Doesn’t do much good, however, because the door to the prison is open and Eko spots the cot inside. You know, a lot of the islanders might forget about that, but this Eko is a sharp one. He’s going to be a huge factor in this group, but he’s just biding his time for now. I think if I were stuck on the island, I’d get really cozy with Eko. He’s probably the best ally you could have. Who would y’all mack on?

Kate strides up to Sawyer all faux-tough and demands a gun. She claims that she won’t tell Sawyer why she needs it, but he only has to flash his dimples once before she tells him everything. She and Claire are headed to the jungle to have words with Rousseau and then maybe try to find the medical bunker. Now, it seems out of character for Sawyer to yield so quickly, but I do believe kids are his weak spot. When he offered medicine for Aaron I actually believed his concern ” and remember the con he backed out of because the woman had a son? He gives her a gun, but does bring up a good point. Why no boys allowed? Now that I think about it, it’s actually patently ridiculous. There’s no harm in having one of these proven ass-kickers along for the ride. More evidence for those on the “Kate is evil” train.

Sun is going to babysit Aaron while Claire goes on her Goddess Quest. Sun doesn’t think it’s a good idea ” she’s pissed that Claire’s ruining her honeymoon, I think. Jin will NOT be pleased to come back from a hard day of fishing to find another man in Sun’s arms. He and Aaron are gonna have words.

In Claire-land, lots more medical stuff. Also, the young woman finally says something: “You have to get out of here.” When the flashback slows down, Ethan is giving Claire another shot in her belly. She claims it “really really hurts” but keeps her composure better than she would during a bikini wax (trust me!), so I don’t believe her. Claire actually seems pretty loopy here, and when Ethan takes her out of the exam room she’s stumbling like an old drunk. He takes her down a creepy hallway to a nursery that has been lovingly decorating. It’s mostly cute, except for the extremely fucked-up mobile with little spinning airplanes on it. Even in her confused state, Claire seems to understand that there’s something off about it.

Ethan is called away by the rather distinct voice of Zeke. Who is clean-shaven and a lot less Deliverance than we’ve seen before. He’s made at Ethan, who was supposed to compile some sort of list before bringing Claire into the hatch. Seems the castaways managed to spook Ethan with the flight manifest, but Zeke is worried about a mysterious “him,” who will apparently wreak great havoc upon them. So there’s a leader that even Zeke is afraid of? Nice.

More speedy shots of syringes and the girl warning Claire, now with shots of the jungle and someone opening a canteen. Claire and Kate take off, and we get some exposition about Rousseau landing here many moons ago with a research team. Kate tells Claire that Rousseau killed her group, which we know is a half truth ” Rousseau says she killed them because they were sick. Kate’s right in not telling Claire, but it’s no use. Rousseau is there and tells Claire that everyone got sick. Claire demands to be taken to the spot where she and Rousseau got into a brawl. She believes Rousseau is in cahoots with Ethan, but! With the way the camera zooms into Rousseau when Claire mentions “a teenage girl,” I don’t think Rousseau knows anything about Ethan. That teenage girl has got to be Rousseau’s daughter Alex, and we know Rousseau misses her daughter like crazy.

Back on the beach, Eko strides up to Jack all casual-like and asks who the prisoner in the hatch is. Eko wants to talk to him. We’ll get back to the boys later.

With the girls, the catfighting is starting already. Of course, Kate brings it to another level by drawing a gun on Rousseau. I feel like Kate is kind of an attention whore. And Claire is the spacey hippy, so when she wanders off alone she’s just being true to form. A fallen tree trunk sends her right back into the flashback, where she’s knitting a bootie. Flashback Claire is high as a freakin’ kite. Ethan takes her for a walk outside, though he tells her to keep it a secret because his “friends” think she’ll run away. You know, Ethan’s pretty smooth. He’d be a total player if he had access to more chicks.

He offers Claire a swig from his canteen. She says whatever’s in it is sour, and while Ethan says he didn’t notice, he also very much does not partake of the refreshments. The baby starts kicking, which leads to a heart to heart. Claire starts making noises about keeping the baby rather than leaving him with the Others and going back to the beach alone, which apparently was the plan. This seems to freak Ethan out for a second, but then plays it like a true manipulator, assuring Claire that everything is ultimately her decision and she has to be comfortable with whatever she decides. The camera pans around and present-day Claire is looking at herself and Ethan talking. Well, she’s looking at her body double and Ethan.

She takes off running and finds…Another big ass hatch! It opens easily…too easily, I think. I find it suspicious. The laides descend, and it’s all swampy and spooky and the lights are flickering. Good thing a box of flashlights is conveniently located at eye level! Claire and Rousseau find the nursery right as Kate turns all the lights on. Everything has been taken down. In a locker room, Kate finds costumes and supplies, including a fake beard. Zeke’s, I bet! I guess they figured dressing up as castaways would prevent the newcomers from figuring out the grand scheme.

Claire finds the baby bootie she made, which sends her into a flashback with Alex trying to make her leave the hatch. Alex shows Claire an operating room full of doctors (or “doctors,” who knows) and warns her that they’re going to take the baby and kill Claire. Claire, who is even higher than before, resists, but Alex knocks her out with chloroform. So Alex is a teenager? She looks about 28.

Claire is convinced that the vaccine is in the operating room. When she and Rousseau get there, Rousseau gets this really weird look on her face that makes me wonder if she’s been there before. Claire is all in a panic when she can’t find the vaccines, but why? Aaron’s already been vaccinated. Stupid woman. Claire freaks out at Rousseau, but in her flashback realizes that Rousseau never tried to hurt her. When she attacked Claire, she was actually trying to keep her hidden from Ethan, who was out looking for her in the jungle, where she had apparently been dropped by Alex. So first of all, it’s kind of heartbreaking that Rousseau and Alex worked together without even knowing it. Second: Aw, Rousseau was trying to help. So misunderstood! But, on the other hand, why didn’t Rousseau just SAY SO? That’s still the biggest problem with this show. It’s not suspenseful when the characters just sit around mope, it’s just boring AND frustrating.

Rousseau peaces out now. She didn’t find Alex, so she’s done. Claire tells Rousseau that Alex helped her. It’s very sweet until Rousseau basically tells Claire that if Aaron is sick, they have to kill him before he infects everyone else. Whoa, harsh, dude. Also, the Bassoons of Angst play for about five hours before we cut to the next scene.

Back in Locke’s hatch, Jack and Eko arrive to talk to the prisoner. Side note: Locke’s using too much water to wash the dishes! I feel like they’re playing fast and loose with the resources here.

As Locke unlocks the door, he warns Eko not to tell Henry what the alarm in for. “What is it for?” asks Eko. Ha! Good call. Locke doesn’t have an answer, so Eko steps into Henry’s room. Henry looks terrified, and I can’t say I blame him. Seriously, they hired this actor for his ability to look two seconds away from shitting himself. Henry still insists he’s not an Other. So where is the FLIPPIN’ BALLOON? I know you guys have all asked this as well, and it’s a damn good question. Eko tells Henry all about the two Others he killed the first night on the island. Why? What is happening here? Why does Henry need to know? Eko just needing to get it off his chest isn’t going to cut it for me. Eko takes a huge knife out and uses it to cut those two nasty, long chin pubes off. Ew! This is so contrived I can’t even stand it. The pubes stood for kills? Weird.\

On the beach, Jack confirms that Aaron isn’t sick anymore. And they’ve hired a cuter baby. Claire gives him the booties she made, which seems weird. Wouldn’t she want to forget all that?

In the hatch, Locke gives Henry some food, and Henry seems a little chattier than usual. He eventually asks Locke whether he’s the Dostoevsky or the Hemingway ” the genius, or the guy trapped under the genius? Yikes. Do not engage, Locke! DO NOT ENGAGE! Yeah, see, this Henry guy is just too on point. He’s an Other. Why else would he be stirring the pot? And if Locke really is as smart as we think he is, he knows right now that Henry is bad news. Unfortunately, judging by the way he throws all the dishes on the floor, Locke has just been played big time. Come on Locke, are you that easy?

Swell episode, I think! Some contrivances, but I guess that’s nothing new. As far as the preview for the new episode, I can say only this: DUH. THERE IS NO BIRTH CONTROL. So don’t act so surprised, Sun.