Rest assured, this post will have no spoilers. It will have no spoilers, primarily cause I can barely keep up with what is happening as I am watching in on an episode to episode basis. Last night on Lost, the WTF-Factor was runnig at about an 9.5, as we watched a divorced polar bear get hit by a car while reading Claires diary…damn this show is confusing.
The formula has remained the same, as I mentioned last week and still applicable this week “Focus on one characters journey on the island to find themselves. Intercut that with flashbacks of their lives in the days an weeks leading up to the island. Sprinkle in a dash of Hurley saying something funny beginning with ‘Dude.’ And then end it with some incredibly vague final note that could quite possibly mean just about anything.”
Last night the focus was on father of the year Michael and his extraordinary son Walt….and boy was his story F’d up. The man we have gotten to know as a distant father who didnt want anything to do with his son emerged tonight as the goddamn father of the year. At the top of the show Michael is looking for Walt only to find him with resident creepster, Locke. But before you start to worry, they werent being dangerous they were merely throwing knifes so it’s cool. The first throw completely misses the tree, but when Locke tells Walt to picture it in his minds eye hitting the tree, guess what?? It hit the tree! nuts huh? Michael once again warned Locke to stay away from his kid to which Locke suggested he stop treating Walt like a kid and let the island be his entry to manhood, like a bar mitzvah only without the gifts. Or the religion. Or the temple. Or toilet paper. Locke and his new goon Boone, wind up going their way, while Walt and Mike go the other. That makes this the perfect time for…….
A younger, less goateed Michael is standing in front of a baby’s crib with his pregnant girlfriend, who won’t marry him (she just doesn’t believe in marriage). The couple, as most young couples do, dream of the future. Michael is so in love with his girlfriend and child, he works while she is pregnant then the plan is for her to finish law school make sick money and support the family.
The next flashback now has Michael and his girlfriend discussing her moving to Amsterdam for work…without Michael, but with Walt. Michael is pissed. He doesn’t want her to go and certainly doesn’t want her to take Walt. She reminds him they talked about spending time apart and when he tries to put his foot down, she points out that they aren’t married. She’s Walts mother and gainfully employed, the courts would rule in her favor. OH SNAPS!
Shortly before Walts 2nd birthday, Michael, seemingly down and out, calls Amerdam from a payphone. The ex suggests he calls back, it’s not a good time blah blah blah, but Michael hears a mans voice in the background. Then its revealed she’s been seeing someone. Fuckin Women! Michael is going to Amsterdam! He slams the phone down and crosses the street determined to fly to Amsterdam. And fly he did. About 6 feet when a small sedan smashes into him.
Which puts him here. In a wheel chair for months. If his story isn’t reason for birth conrtol, I don’t know what is. While he sits in his wheelchair drawing a picture for his 2 year old son, who appears but his ex. She feels guilty for what has happened and demands to pay for the medical bills. Which really is sweet. Oh, she came to pay for the bills and have Mike sign custody over to Brad her fiance. Oh did I not mention shes decided to get married now? To the guy who hired her in Amsterdam? Oh that and her new guy, Brad, wants to adopt Michaels son. I am assuming that they edited the part when she tips over his wheel chair and kicks him in the spleen while he’s down.
The next flashback we see is one of Walts not Michaels. Now living in Australia with his mom and Brad, Walt is studying the local birds and trying to get his moms attention to show a photo of a cool bird in his book. Sadly, she is too busy being carressed to notice. At the heat of his frustration there is a thud at the window. Brad and Walt walk over and see a bird (the same bird Walt was looking at in the book) dead on the ground. That’ll teach the birds to let Walts mom flirt with her husband. Brad gives Walt a look worthy of a bad Twilight Zone episode.
A now healed and back on his feet Michael is chilling in his apartment when there is a knock at the door. It’s Brad. AKWARD. He comes bearing bad news. Hes wife, Walts mom, is dead. Michael invites Brad in. Turns out she had a rare blood disorder was sick for less than a week and then died. In a move that took a lot of sac, Brad asks Michael to take Walt back. He never wanted the kid in the first place, he only adopted Walt to get the girl. Such Moxy!! He gives Michael a plane ticket and begs him to take Walt back, we mentions Walt is different than other kids. There’s something off about him.
Michael is now in Australia to meet Walt and take him back. When he is given a box of things that Walts mom kept for him. Walt refuses to go anywhere with Michael. They havent ever met and Walt has a dad, Brad. Michael, rather than defend himself by calling those sad sacks out, actually protects Brad and says Brad wants him, but Michael is legal gaurdian bla bla bla, you can even take Brads dog.
Meanwhile, back on the island….
Sayid is still trying to decifer the maps he stole from the now even more lost French woman. Charlie has decided to go hunting for Claires diary. Why? Cause we haven’t seen him in a while and for all the Hobbit cash they had to cough up to get him they will invent lame subplots to get him more screen time. So he hunts down the diary which is inevitably in winds up in Sawyers hands. after a brief, lame exchange between Sawyer and Charlie, our hobbit leaves with the diary. The precious diary which he inevitably reads the pages. Turns out Claire wrote down her dreams of her abduction and mentioned a black rock she was being detained at. Charlie tried to rally the troops to go look for a black rock in the middle of the night. Yeah, didn’t work.
The main island story was the love triangle of Locke, Michael and Walt. Walt kept running off to be with Locke which worried Michael who threatened to kill Lock if he spent anymore time with his son. After refusing to have his son grow up on the island, Michael decides to built a raft. He finds Walt and asks him to help. Walt who is busy reading a The Flash comic book, disregaurds his father. When Mike notices hes reading a comic, he tries to relate to his son and tells him he used to be a tracer for comic books. When Walt clearly didnt give a shit about his dads attempt to relate to his son, Michael gave up and forced Walt to him him. After a bit of work, Walt see’s Boone and Locke walk by and tells his dad he is going for water. Of course he goes and hangs out with the guys, until Michael breaks that up which leads to a blow out between father and son. Walt verbally stabs Michael when he says “youre not my dad” to which Michael throws The Flash comic in the campfire and forces Walt to sit down. A deserted island version of timeout I suppose. A short time later Mike notices his kid is gone and immediately heads to find Locke.
Walt has actually taken his dog for a walk but when the dog gets loose and Walt goes searching for him he finds somethig much bigger, the polar bear.
Meanwhile Michael learns Locke told Walt they couldnt hang out and that he should respect his fathers wishes. Michael too proud to ask for help doesn’t need to, Locke volunteers to go help find Walt. The two find Walt huddled in a corner while the polar bear is trying to get to him. Long story short, they save him. When they return to camp Michael shows Walt what his mother had set aside for him, all the cards he drew for his son.
The huge random cliff hanger this week…..a now non pregnant Claire emerges from the brush battered and bruised.
So…Ummmm WTF is going on? Is the magic in the island? is the magic all in Walt? Walt gets agitated, bird flies into window. Walt gets angry, plane crashes. Walt gets scared, polar bears attack.
LOST is such an approriate title for the show cause it applies to both the characters and the audience. To top it all off, next weeks previews are reruns from Sayids encounter with the French woman so we don’t even get anymore clues. Woah is me……
The one thing I am really enjoying is rift developing weekly between Locke and Boone and the rest of the players. Though Boone now reminds me of the goons from the original batman series in that hes very one dimensional, I still enjoy what will eventually be a fun splitting of the camp. And I’d also like to point out, has anyone seen any of the other 42 crash survivors on the show lately? Even as extras?
OK Gasm readers…what are your thoughts?