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According to his IMBD credits, it seems Samuel L. Jackson will be joining the cast of LOST next season for at least the 1st episode. I can only speculate that his character will exist in a flashback, but there is always the possibility that after they blew open the hatch in the season finale, one pissed off, locked up Samuel L. Jackson popped out, in a patent leather trench, ranting about keepin’ the black man locked down, in a kick ass monologue which ends in a simple but killer action scene set with humor.
But the whole Sam Jackson on an island thing has got me thinking… Were I stuck on an island, would I want Sam Jackson to be there with me. I suppose it all depends on WHICH Sam Jackson showed up. What follows after the jump are the many looks of Sam Jackson and my feelings on him being on MYL Island based on said looks.
Pros: Beret and shirt could attract high flying aircraft.
Cons: Beret and shirt could attract gay island natives.
Verdict: Too Diva, I don’t want this guy on my island.
Pros: He would be the one to kill the boar, happily.
Cons: He would then move on to the women and children.
Verdict: Though I’m not a fan of worrying about my safety, the potential for a lipstick cam in the women’s locker room welcomes crazy Coach Jackson to my island.
Pros: Already has the Island wear – circa Gilligan’s Island pilot.
Cons: Not Sam Jackson.
Verdict: No, I don’t need another guy eating my island food if it is not the L. Jackson!
Pros: Probably adept at living off the land, could come in handy.
Cons: Allergic to cats, most likely reeks before we even arrive, most likely has mental instabilities, I’d probably wind up calling him Mr. Glover.
Verdict: Despite all the cons, I would have to assume if there was weed on the island, this SamElJack would be the one to find it, dry it, roll it and share it. My island awaits you, sir.
Pros: Most likely will come to the island with their own laugh track.
Cons: By the time the Jackson twins arrive at the island UPN will have already commissioned the script writing for this as a companion sitcom for FRANtastsic Fridays.
Verdict: Two Jacksons are better than one, and we get screaming angry Sammy and cautious, slow-speaking, cool smoking Sammy. A must have for any island desertion.
Pros: We’ve all known a professor can be quiet handy when stranded on a desert island.
Cons: We also know how it ended for this professor in Deep Blue Sea. If I’m going to be stuck on an island with people trying to kill me, a giant invisible shadow alarm system both eating people and dragging them underground, the last thing I need are genetically mutated sharks biting me in half.
Verdict: There’s only room for one man of science on the island, and I’m afraid Jack’s that man, sorry Sam.
Pros: His sci-fi enthusiasm could come in handy in trying to decipher the island secrets.
Cons: His sci-fi enthusiasm.
Verdict: I don’t care to hear speculations on whether Jar-Jar could beat up Roger Rabbit in a Klingon Battle to the death. He’s not welcome. Though, now I am somewhat curious, who would win in hand-to-hand combat twixt the two – your thoughts?
Pros: He’s gonna be fun to talk to. Charming as hell. Brought the stogies. Knows to how to play poker. Makes us all Laugh. Good looking guy.
Verdict: Hell NO!! With only a limited number of single women on the island, I can’t compete with that shit. Why couldn’t we have gotten John Travolta!?