Millionaire Matchmaker Recap: Jimmy Hats (but no hats)

Recaps

By SexyPanda | Saturday, January 26, 2013 | 2:34 pm | 7 Comments
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Posted in: Millionaire Matchmaker, Recaps

Of course, Jim2 brags about bagging models left and right, which disgusts Patti. I think her horror stems from two things: 1.) that a Skeletor-faced dude gets to be so cocky about looks and 2.) from a matchmaker perspective, how hard that’s going to be to break.

Welp, enough of this shit, Patti’s off to meet these braggarts personally!

First up is Skeletor Jim2, whom Patti meets atop some hotel in Venice Beach. He looks a little better in real life and sun, as opposed to his video, which Patti comments on. Well, SHE says, “You look different than your pictures,” and he asks, “Is that better or worse?” “I don’t know,” says Patti with a sneer. OH SNAP.

Worse.

Blasting off right into his official intro! James Grdina, with his start-up company financing specialty cars. I did a little Googling and found that Skeletor competed last year in some kind of bodybuilder contest through IFBB. But, he’s wearing, like, board shorts in the photos. I thought they had to wear little skimpies? I’m a scaredy-cat about viruses or I’d click on some of those photos to really give it my all.

Anyway, we see evidence of the perfectionism when he shows us his kitchen cabinets (everything facing the same direction, just so) and his closet (twelve identical pairs of jeans hung up identically on identical hangers), and so on. He looks like fun!

He brags about not looking like a 52-year-old man, but he’s wrong. He definitely looks like he’s in his 50’s. A well-put-together 50s, but still 50-something. And that way his mouth turns down as he talks doesn’t help. (But I don’t think he can help that, it’s the way the good lord made him, so I won’t mock it anymore. Just remember that I’m fascinated by it.) And he brags about being a giver in a relationship, which is lovely, but you also have to let people be themselves in relationships, too, not “give” them more to be disciplined about.

Back to actual Jim2 and Patti on this roof-deck. Patti’s bag is lovely and prominently displayed in the shot. Is that an Hermes bag, or some other brand’s facsimile? Anyone know? (And if it IS Hermes, think it’s real? That shit is no joke.) Also, is anyone else waiting for a stiff wind to blow it right off the table and over the side of the building?

Jim2 and Patti chat about his previous relationships, namely, his divorce. He was married for five years to a Playmate of the Year, but she kept spending more and more time away from home. His penis was sad about that. “Why love now?” Because, he says, he’s still looking for the right one. Ah, the perfectionist! (But, really, the sucker just wants TV time for his business.)

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About

Time for an update! I used to be a tall, athletic editor who lived on the East coast. Oh, I still am, only now I've gained back all the weight I lost, which changes my life-tone quite a bit. Now that I'm married, I have a lot less time to watch Bravo and Food network. We usually end up watching Big Bang Theory reruns ("all of my friends, all of my friends, all of my friends") or Wipeout. Or WWE Raw. Wow. How life has changed!  Join me as we chat about my breast friend Patti Stanger and her love minions. Or maybe we'll talk about art during Work of Art. Whatever we're watching, don't be shy--tell me what you think!

7 Comments

  1. 1
    Tmurda
    Posted January 26, 2013 at 9:53 pm

    I, too, hate when Patti calls a girl a “spinner”. I don’t neccessarily think it’s rude, it’s just one of those things (much like the penis-getting-off-the-couch with praying hands raising thing, or the “you can’t go in, in, or in” thing pointing to her vag, butt, then mouth) that Patti came up with and started saying cause she thinks it’s REALLY funny and clever….but it’s not.
    What I DO think is really fucking rude is how she comes off all mamma bear to the women, obsessing over the millionares being gentlemenly, and comforting them when they’ve had a traumatizing date with one by saying “awe! Don’t worry, i’ll set you up with a great guy, promise!”, but she completely uses some auditionees as her little “tests”. Granted, the majority of the women are gold-diggers who will pretend any millionare is interesting and NOT hideous , no matter how un-interesting and disgusting they are, for a shot at his cash, BUT it’s still not ok. Patti has no problem using her “tests”, wasting a signifigant amount of time at an evening at an evening mixer, then a day&night date. I guess Patti only requires the men to show them respect, not herself. Way to show a good “women should be treated like gold” example, Patti!
    I also was annoyed by dude’s claiming the chick had awful table manners. I have seen BAD table manners! Hers were not. At all.
    Racheal and Destin’s name is Sin? Maybe cute little Sin will one day get a baby sister named Rape! So cute.
    Awesome recap!!!

  2. 2
    Tmurda
    Posted January 26, 2013 at 9:55 pm

    *I meant racheal and destin’s KID’S name.

  3. 3
    TallGirl
    Posted January 27, 2013 at 11:30 am

    SexyPanda,
    I did a double-take when I saw this show. I actually used to know Jim2 about 30 years ago. We worked out at the same gym. Back then, he was a cute guy with a good bod and a terrific personality. Don’t know what the heck has happened to him in the intervening years to make him so weird. Maybe because it’s his brother, Jay, that was married to Jenna Jameson, and he sued both of them for defrauding him on money he loaned them for a business venture.
    Saw a blog where Jim2 was dating a “stunning” girl at the time of the filming, did the show as a “favor” to one of the producers whom he knows. His gf knew he was doing the show. Maybe that explains why he picked someone who was an obvious “Fail” and also harder for someone who doesn’t speak English well to call him out on his sh*t. He REEKS of insecurity, and if you check out the Bravo site, Patti’s “theta healer” even tells him that his perfectionism has its roots in insecurity. In a Disney movie, he’d have a woman with 5 unruly kids and multiple pets move in with him to cure him of all his perfectionism. Don’t you feel sorry for his cleaning crew????

  4. 4
    Parker
    Posted January 29, 2013 at 10:14 pm

    That freak from AZ should have known that the German girl was not for him. For crying out loud, he’s a biz man and can’t even seal the deal with the right woman? Also, what’s with the 20K Q about her coming to the US. Can’t he be creative and ask her about her likes & dislikes, what movies she’s seen lately, where’s she traveled to, what’s her favorite food… etc. Patty thinks that 8-pack Jim learned his lesson? Hello? This guy is a total freak-a-zone. Nope, he’s not learning anything but how to stroke his ego. Selma is cute but her boobs are soooo fake. But, then again… I’m not a dude, so I guess I can’t really have an opinion about that, right? Right? Right! The real winner is Patty. Go Patty go…

  5. 5
    eyediosmio eyediosmio
    Posted January 30, 2013 at 8:38 am

    Hola sexy panda! Glad to have you back, and it was my pleasure filling in! So funny the way you pronounced ay dios mio, but I have to say I mispronounced EVERYTHING in Spanish, but now I have a Spanish husband to set me straight in all things Latino.

    This show is so great in a trainwreck sorta way. Love it!

    Keep up the LOL’s!

  6. 6
    DJ
    Posted January 31, 2013 at 8:22 am

    @Tmurda – The German girl looked like a little kid learning to use a knife and fork for the first time. She held the fork in a weird way and picked up the knife by the blade instead of the handle.

  7. 7
    Parker
    Posted January 31, 2013 at 7:11 pm

    Yeah, actually I agree she looked a bit awkward holding the knife and fork. Germans use the knife and fork differently than in the US, but she did not hold them in the German manner. I have no idea what she was trying to do. May be she was just insecure or clueless about what to do.

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