MiniCap: American Idol Results

Recaps

By IceQueen | Friday, May 20, 2011 | 12:31 am | 13 Comments
Tagged: , , , , ,
Posted in: American Idol, MiniCaps, Recaps

So last night was the big hometown visit episode of Idol and one of the top three was booted. The hometown visits are my least favorite episodes because they’re incredibly formulaic. Arrive in town… go to the radio station… have a parade… tearfully thank everyone for coming while young girls who should be at school are instead staring and crying and putting America further behind in the race to the top with China. Or something like that.

haley hometown2011-05-14_2011062_0411.jpglauren hometown

Tink proudly tells us that there were more than 95 million votes cast on Wednesday night — the largest non-finale number in Idol history. The final three are brought out looking like Jem, Howdy Doody and a flower child. The first off-topic video of the night is a trip to the Bad Robot Production studios where they meet with JJ Abrams, see clips from his new film Super 8, and get some Super 8 cameras of their own. At least I think that’s what happened. JJ — an Isaac Mizrahi lookalike — was all hopped up on Four Loko or something and delivered his sentences fast and furiously. After that, Elle Fanning — little sister of Dakota — chats with Tink. Good lord, how old is that child? And why is she towering over Tink? She’s only 13 but she’s a head taller than him. Anyway, she looms over him and giggles and tells him that her little cousin has picked Scotty as the winner. Thank you, little cousin. Everyone else can go home now.

Haley is the first to head home to “the Chicago area.” When she lands, she lurches through Chicago and walks past a giant limo with a big American Idol sign. She’s stunned to find out that this is the limo she’s supposed to get into. Surprise? In her hometown of Wheeling, teenagers are losing their minds over her and she tells one girl “thank you for freaking out.” Ha!

She goes to her parents’ house and then there’s a parade in the rain followed by a visit to her high school. Since Wheeling apparently has no stadiums, parks or concert venues, it’s off to the track so that she can perform “Sweet Home Chicago” with her dad.

Next on the show… a performance by Il Volo. I didn’t know who these guys were and didn’t really have expectations, but boy was I surprised. I guess they’re three Italian virgins who discovered that if they sang together, the ragazze would throw their biancheria intima onstage. Lauren Alaina seems particularly stunned when the little one with the giant red glasses opens his mouth and belts.

Scotty’s hometown’s up next. He gets off the plane in North Carolina shouting “baby, lock them doors!” Then he’s headed for the local radio station and eats a donut handed to him from the crowd. He also stops by the grocery store where he used to work and his school. He does a ton of crying, but he isn’t sad for long. Josh Turner who sings “Your Man” a/k/a Babylockthemdoors walks on stage while Scotty’s singing. Scotty says it’s the best day of his life.

Even though Tink promised us yesterday that 50 Cent would perform with Nicole Sherzinger, it’s mostly Nicole herself, writhing around in a dress made from string and toilet paper. I appreciate that she decided to sing without any sort of voice modification, but she sounded pretty terrible. And 50′s appearance was so short, I’m still not convinced he was there.

Lauren Alaina’s crying before her plane even lands for her hometown visit. There’s the usual roaming around town while kids squeal and lawmakers who should have better things to do make proclamations. But Lauren’s visit actually had a very touching piece to it, too. She toured an area damaged by recent tornadoes and met an adorable little boy who rescued his family from the rubble. It actually brought a strange moisture to my eyes that I think a warmer person may call “tears.” It feels so weird to type that word… Later, Lauren sings “Do It Anyway” for a large crowed gathered in Chattanooga.

Finally time for results! Scotty is, of course, a shoe-in for the finals. I think we all could have agreed on that. So… would it be aw shucks adorable country teen Lauren? Or sexy but accident-prone rocker chick Haley in the final? America wanted its country, apparently, because Lauren’s headed to the finals with Scotty.

Haley didn’t look too bummed out and, honestly, I think she’s headed for great things. She has an amazing voice, but this competition was probably too mainstream pop for her, and her recent missteps with the song choices kind of prove that. I know a lot of ya’ll loved her Led Zeppelin performance on Wednesday. Were you shocked by her elimination? What do you think is to blame?

About

Icequeen is a nonprofit employee who spends her days trying to make the world a better place to make up for the things that she does at night. A former television producer and reporter, she is obsessed with TV and film and is saving up to make her next documentary. When she's not working, writing or watching TV, she enjoys boys, food and travel. Though she has lived all over the U.S., she currently resides in Washington, DC.

13 Comments

  1. 1
    itchy
    Posted May 20, 2011 at 3:31 am

    Ugh. Well, no need to tune in next week, so there’s that. Kind of predictable, although I was hoping for a surprise upset. And of course the winner of next week is so obvious, there’s really no point in having the show. Unless Lauren wears a huge old cross dangling outside of her shirt next week. A really huge cross. A cross as big as her…accent.

    I think Haley’s demographic just isn’t the type to obsessively dial/text/internet vote like the two bumpkins crowd, that’s all. Has nothing to do with performance, or vocal quality.

  2. 2
    Stef
    Posted May 20, 2011 at 6:54 am

    Being a Haley-hater, I thought the look on her face in that moment was absolutely priceless.

    “Is this a JOKE? Are you seriously sending ME home right now? ME???”

    Snotty bitch. Don’t let the door hit ya on the way OUT.

  3. 3
    See-Jay
    Posted May 20, 2011 at 7:36 am

    I couldn’t be any more disinterested in the finale. It always seems like the seasons with the most talent whittle down to the most bland contestants.

  4. 4
    Nikki Hughes
    Posted May 20, 2011 at 8:23 am

    Haley was PISSED and SHOCKED at the audacity of the voters. LOLZ

  5. 5
    vallegirl vallegirl
    Posted May 20, 2011 at 8:31 am

    I thought Il Volo were two forgotten Jonas Brothers and Arthur Darvill’s goofy little cousin. I didn’t realize Italy grew them that awkward. Chubby was cracking me up, though. He couldn’t have been more unctuous if he were dipped in olive oil.

    But Haley really was pissed off when she got the boot. It was funny to watch but save the stank-face until after you have that contract, sweetie. I was expecting her to be in the finale with Scotty, though.

  6. 6
    CattyFan cattyfan
    Posted May 20, 2011 at 10:04 am

    So…the finale I predicted during Hollywood week is coming next week. No wonder this show lost my interest.

  7. 7
    Crabby Old Bat
    Posted May 20, 2011 at 12:50 pm

    My mileage varies, I am a huge Led Zep fan and absolutely HATED Haley’s version. Girl had way too much attitude – don’t try to school the audience in what they ought to like, dear, it’s patronizing and off-putting. She has an amazing voice and zero marketability. Jazz and old-school rock don’t sell anymore.

  8. 8
    juddfan
    Posted May 20, 2011 at 2:57 pm

    Have to agree with those who saw stunned and pissed on her face. The cynic in me said “Told ya so” but part of me was really hoping for an upset. I agree, Itchy, those tweens ruin all our fun with their tech savvy, argh!!! But I read all over accounts of people who never once voted who were dialing in. Even I did.

    I just read a list of top ten idol sellers . . . Carrie has topped Kelly, then Daughtry, Clay, Fanny, Rueben, and few more down to Kellie Pickler. Daughtry was about half the Carrie sales, Clay half of his and the rest were a mil and change. There was no Lee, no Bowersox, no Gokey, no Doolitle, no Adam, no Archie . . . I mean, I don’t know how many cds these peeps that had records sold to not even make that list. It’s dismal and grim out there, even for a kid coming off a reality show . . . so all this talk of better lives and family’s etc . . . I say, look it up kiddies, the odds are very against you. Haley will be in for an uphill climb. I don’t know why I have the feeling 19 wont sign her, and if she can find someone else who will, she’ll have to pay both 19 and them a percentage of what might be meager sales. To quote one of my all time favorite songs . . . it’s hard out there for a pimp!!!

    Glad she did Bennie again . . . I”m at least gonna download a couple of her tracks.

    And call me crazy, but Lauren didn’t look surprised, it was a bit more, “as expected, oh is that Haley next to me . . . stunned . . . silly girl . . . doesn’t she get it! This is my year, bitch, and finally you’ll be gone so I can go back to sleep for the rest of this.”

    There was no hug, of sorry, or congrats, at least not until after a full minute of my imagined Lauren’s thoughts, and those of Haley, said so eloquently imagined by Stef.

    At least I gained a few hours of life not having to watch the finale, or vote again!!!

  9. 9
    jayem
    Posted May 20, 2011 at 3:44 pm

    I am so heartbroken over her ouster. I knew it was coming, but I still hoped for an upset. But she went out with a bang. And I don’t care who she signs with, I’ll be the first in line to get her cd!! GO SCOTTY!!!

  10. 10
    CattyFan cattyfan
    Posted May 21, 2011 at 9:21 am

    juddfan…my understanding is the contract the (inexperienced) kids signs ties them to the show and 19 for six years after their appearances (including the tour) are complete. That’s a long time to owe a pound of flesh to a company that might not even help you with your career.

    Think about it. They drop-kicked Taylor Hicks (worst winner ever) after only two years…but they still got part of his paycheck while he was in the touring company of Grease last year.

  11. 11
    zbird
    Posted May 21, 2011 at 11:29 am

    I dropped the last two shows from my DVR. I FF through the majority of Scotty’s and Lauren’s songs anyway, so why waste the time/precious DVR space. Bring on SYTYCD!

  12. 12
    leslilly
    Posted May 21, 2011 at 9:00 pm

    Itchy, you called it early on that Scotty McCreepy would be the winner. ugh, ugh, ugh. Everyone interesting has left this competition.

  13. 13
    juddfan
    Posted May 23, 2011 at 10:14 am

    CAtty, yes, that’s what I understand. I know Clay and Josh Gracin (who had a good run on Country radio (10 singles, two albums, a bunch of top 5′s and one or two number 1′s-couldn’t find sales number, but first one was gold) negotiated out of their contract . . not sure how that works . . . but otherwise, I don’t know if it stops you from having an outside deal, as long as you pay up.

    I could be confused by stories about Queen and Billy Joel, who both signed with sleezeballs, and tried and tried and tried to get out of it, but had to pay millions to the db’s by the end.

    I shudder to think what the x-factor contract is, since the winner gets 5 million (1 million a year) Me thinks a dud seller would get the dump and no where near the whole 5 . . . and to pay back the 5mil, without being a Leona Lewis . . . hard to do, I think.

    Still, I wish her luck. I say I would buy her CD, but alas, altho I did get Adam, and Elliot’s first, and I have all the Blake Lewis, which I LOVE! I can’t guarantee I would. Never got Allison’s, and just heard she got dumped. Poor kids.

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