Minicap: Beverly Hills Fabulous

I’m not completely convinced that fabulous hairstyles come out of this salon, but when it comes to Elgin the man being fabulous, I’m a believer. And the losers of the hair battle in South Beach, the Natural Trendsetters salon, would probably break open their best bottle of $2 Boone’s Farm and toast in agreement.

Elgin shakes his gorgeous mane, stands erect like a warrior (one with a slight lisp, but a warrior nonetheless), and thrusts his pelvis like the ovulating ex-wife of an NBA player. But let me tell you who ended up on the opposite end of the fabulous spectrum, everyone else:

Sean goes on a blind date with a buff wrestler who takes him shopping. As usual, Sean is completely over the top. And I mean “literally.” This fool rides the wrestler piggyback through the entrance of a high-end clothing store while wearing gold lame. Well, it IS Miami. Maybe, he’s paying homage to Dorothy from the Golden Girls. Those hideous outfits should’ve made Bea Arthur heave up her breakfast every morning, but I still bet she made it to work on time. Not Sean. He arrives at the convention center moments before the hair show begins. At first, he can’t find the area designated for his team. And then, he incites a hissing, clapping, taze-ing riot among a group of broken down queens—a trio that is nothing but tragic to the fab world of drag.

Katrina take us back to pre-adolecense, wearing white shorts poolside over her bikini bottoms. Her Elgin Charles Salon salary isn’t large enough to pay for a proper cover-up? It’s Miami, honey, not the U Street Community Center Pool. Her look really hit rock bottom with the feathery pom pom she’s wearing in the very tip top of her head. At confessional time, I mistake her for an ostrich.

Lolita may be to blame for Katrina’s hair infraction. During hair tip time, she recommends a style that involves gel and something slicked back. Nothing short of homeliness describes a look that involves either of the two. That being said, Lolita’s hood-rat hair tip is still not as offensive as her flirting. She committed all kinds of flagrant fouls while poolside with Katrina. But at least she wears the right attire while doing it.

To learn who else did what else, check the full recap in a few days.