Four is the new five
Good morning, Gasmii. This week’s episode of Dance Moms Miami was a little schizophrenic, no? First the moms are clawing each other’s eyes out, then they are happy and laughing and getting yelled at by Victor for having too much fun. Don’t they know we didn’t sign on for fun?
It’s lineup time and Abby and Sammy are nowhere to be found. Could they have left for good? Suspense!
For some reason, VictAng have decided to start unveiling the list from the bottom, where we find Miss Sammy. Angel is not going to waste saliva talking about why because she is not here. Harsh! Fourth on the list is Hannah, then Lucas (Bitchette is thrilled!), Kimmy is second and finally, Jessi is on top. That doesn’t stop Susan from making a bitchface, but I think at this point it’s just involuntary.
This week, the kids go to yet another Starbound in San Antonio. Is Starbound the only comp that will let them film or something? Jessi and Kimmy do a duet; Lucas and Hannah get solos, and oh, hello, who is this strolling in late? It’s Sammy and Abby, flouting the rules as usual. Well, Sammy is NOT getting a solo, so there! Instead she will just be featured in the group number, the theme of which is “Abandonment.” Ironic! Or not.
In other news: Bob gets the Mean Girl treatment; there is yelling and snide remarks about Hannah’s weight; Mayra teaches a ballet class and turns on the crocodile tears and Angel deserts the team in their hour of need! Oh the humanity.
The best part of this week’s episode was the previews for next week and the long-awaited arrival of Mia. Her mom looks like a trip and a half and I can’t wait, because looks like shit gets real between her and Bitchette.
I’ll have the complete deets up in a couple of days. Until then, why not reread some regular Dance Moms recaps to get ready for the big return on June 5?
Thanks for reading, and have a great day.
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