Hello! Hello! Hello! And welcome to RuPaul’s Drag Race: Reunited, where, hopefully, we’ll finally find out who won, who didn’t and what the hell Willam did. But first…a production number to If I Dream because RuPaul has become the king of both sincerity and parodying the false sincerity of Hollywood. Bow to Ru’s ability to make us care even while we’re laughing at all the ploys and manipulations used to make us care.
Logo really upped the budget this year and it’s set at the El Portal theater and is super glamorous with as many former contestants as they could corral, including Pork Chop, who I remember, I promise. Then it’s time to interview each of the past contestants in the order they left except for Kenya because her finishing position was artificially inflated and Willam, of course, because bitch needed her own segment to regale us with her awesomeness, and what the hell she did to get the boot (SPOILER…booty calls from Mr. Willam), one last time. And Latrice because she came in fourth, won Miss Congeniality, and will forever be known as the one who should have made it.
Those segments are entertaining because Ru knows how to put on a show. But now it’s time to talk to the top 3…and that was kind of glorious. Chad and Sharon get their say and look beautiful doing it, with Chad being polished and articulate while Sharon is all emotion, but then Ru gets to Phi Phi. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Man, editing may have left her worst on the cutting room floor. Luckily, there’s a crass blonde in Louboutin’s and a unicorn dress to bluntly call her on her shit, paving the way for the others to speak honestly about what a cooze Phi Phi was during filming. And coin a new word that Ru’s going to mop for himself. Bless you, Willam Belli, for being you.
Then a quick segment where find out what winning would mean to each of the top three before we meet each queen’s family and find out that Chad’s boyfriend is sweet, Sharon’s mom is really pretty and pretty awesome, and Phi Phi’s mother proves a mother’s love really is unconditional because she’s Phi Phi’s mother and still loves her son.
With all the preliminaries out of the way, Ru is FINALLY ready to crown the winner of RuPaul’s Drag Race. And the winner is…
I wasn’t gonna still leave you hanging.
Full recap in a few days. Until then, you can catch up on the last recap here. Or you can watch Willam’s new and totally and completely NSFW video. And don’t be rounding up.
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