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COME BACK, WILLAM!
Well, that’s not going to happen and the work room is more boring because of it. The queens happily dance on Willam’s figurative grave, of course, ignoring the fact that he beat all their asses. After they celebrate it’s time to get down to the challenges. First up, a mini challenge where they have to decorate a pair of stripper heels to pair with their assigned Absolut cocktail. And with the Absolut challenge comes Absolut’s own precious little sprite, Jeffrey Moran to tell a bunch of dudes in dresses how they lack the appropriate level of gravitas and sophistication to represent the brand. Winner throws a bunch of crap on the shoes and makes them look, in the words of Pandora Boxx, like a donkey fucked a piñata, so she wins. Because Absolut is klassy like that. Winner wins absolutely (har, har) nothing but bragging rights.
Main challenge is to become a Presidential candidate for the Wig Party and participate in a debate. Ru brings along Dan Savage on his walk through and Dan grills the queens like they’re actual candidates. Some handle it well, others don’t, and Phi Phi visibly vibrates when she gets the slightest whiff of criticism. Imagine that. Ctrl+P. But it’s all pretty anti-climactic after last week’s challenge, and I’m a little sad that Willam wasn’t there to win another challenge because this was right up his alley, too. Meanwhile, Dan Savage is no Lucian Piane with his magically elfin face, and Santino’s back, so the panel is appropriately dour. Although Dan gets off what was quite possibly the best description of anyone’s runway ensemble, ever.
Runway is to dress for the Inaugural Ball and only Chad seems to know what that means. Of course, Chad thought she was going to Eisenhower’s first inaugural so sometimes closest only means least furthest away and not a bullseye. Sharon decided to metaphorically flip off Michelle by ditching the white contacts but pulling out one of her freakiest ensembles to date since it’s not like a drag queen’s going to be President any time soon. But Michelle, fickle as ever, doesn’t clock her for it this week. Michelle thought she was awesome. I will never figure that woman out.
So neither the winner nor the loser is any big surprise and most of the episode was kind of sleepy after the fireworks from last week until Ru makes the big announcement. Michelle and Santino are picking a queen to come back to the competition so she can get re-eliminated next week. (Not a spoiler.)
BRING BACK WILLAM!
Full recap in a few days. Until then, you can catch up on the last recap here.
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Thanks for being here!