Minicap: Real Housewives of NYC

Recaps

By BelowSeaLevel | Monday, September 17, 2012 | 10:50 pm | 29 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Real Housewives of NYC, Recaps

The ladies are back from their trip to St. Barths and bringing the drama.  Ramona and Mary-O open this week’s episode with cooking school at her friend’s home.  Lu and Jacques join them, along with Sonja and some unnamed guy that smiles a lot. 

Did a can of spray tan explode on this guy’s face or is he just happy to see Sonja?

 

Since the men will be cooking, Lu, Ramona, and Sonja leave the kitchen and chat about the trip.  RamonJa is expecting to hear more about Italian-gate, but nothing is ever said about it, so they think Lu and Jacques must have worked it all out. 

Heather and Carole go drinking, and at one point, Carole talks about Aviva being a runaway bride one week before her wedding in Jamaica.  Really?  A runaway bride?  Talk turns to circumcision and showing some leg to a group of gay guys.  Holla!

Lu and Heather get together for sushi.  Heather wants to hear more about Italian-gate, but Lu shifts the conversation to IVF to save her relationship with Jacques.  Not cheating works well in relationships, too.  Just sayin’.

What are you doing ordering a fertility salad with extra nuts?

 

Dinner brings together Aviva, Heather, and Carole.  A couple of the new girls probably want to have a fun get-together, but Aviva commandeers the conversation to diss the Noodle Nymphettes.  Hilarious that she labels Sonja as insecure since she can’t function without Reid Ramona. 

While out shopping, Carole confides to Aviva that she’s started smoking again.  Aviva HIGHLY approves.

With my statistics, this restaurant could crash into the ocean at any moment.

 

Ramona visits Sonja in her home, and they jump in bed together.  Bad news for anyone wishing for some girl on girl.  Sonja is panicking a little since she’s scheduled for a face-to-face meeting with her ex-husband to discuss her settlement.  They’re divorced, but the settlement is still lingering.  If something doesn’t happen soon, Sonja could lose her home. 

Aviva and Sonja meet for drinks and pizza.  Aviva starts with a sort-of-maybe apology, but Sonja is still hurt from being called white trash.  Sonja goes all “Git Er Dun” and basically tells Aviva that she’s over and done with her.  They go back and forth a little until Sonja puts on her hat and walks off.  Sonja can hold her own and gave quite a classy beat down.

Next week, the Hornysaurus returns.

The full recap is on its way, so please check back soon.  Last week’s recap is available by clicking here.

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Living in New Orleans, it helps to be a good swimmer.  

 

 

 

29 Comments

  1. 1
    Derek Hazelton
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 2:28 am

    If Sonja can’t handle being called “white trash,” I wonder how she’s handled being known as a dithering anal queen since the St. Barth’s trip aired.

  2. 2
    kthxbai kthxbai
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 2:51 am

    No offense to the Carole love train. But I’ve had some of the same thoughts they were saying on the podcast. About her topic that’s so painful she can’t stand to talk about it. Except on tv.

    Sonya should call Rob Kardashian up. He’d understand her toaster oven situation. He’s got the same problems trying to launch his sock line. Plus I think his house has a garden.

  3. 3
    NotAlway'sPerfekt
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 6:29 am

    My favorite…”Noodle Nymphettes”. Bwahahaha!!! Can’t wait for the full recap!

  4. 4
    Gypsy Gypsy
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 7:06 am

    With all of these dinners you’d think these chicks would gain an ounce or two. Bulimics! J/K everyone.

    Color me out of the loop but what is a pink cigarette?

    Oh and STFU already Kelly, uh I mean, Aviva! #stopembarassingVassar

  5. 5
    bubblesballentine
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 7:46 am

    I’m guessing the pink cigs were by Nat Sherman, easily found in NYC(that’s where I got them back in the day). They come in different colors and tobacco blends, but they’re ‘regular’ cigarettes – just look fancier.

  6. 6
    Gypsy Gypsy
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 8:01 am

    Thanks Bubbles. Pink cigarettes to me are the ones you could buy at the penny candy store with bubblegum in them.

  7. 7
    Jason
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 8:02 am

    What is it with these stupid American women and uncut dick? What’s not to like? It’s a natural state of the human body. How would you like it if someone snipped off part of your hoohaa, Tranny Heather? And, please, your husband is about as gay as they come, lady.

  8. 8
    RomoSheDiNT
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 8:34 am

    @Gypsy Maybe Carole should’ve just told Aviva her cigs were gum. It would’ve been easier and Aviva wouldn’t have lost a couple of years off her life. Wtf on her freak out? Like she’s her mom…?
    @BSL SonJa was classy telling off Aviva. I wanted to hit her with her fake leg and I don’t even have beef with her. All that bullshit she said about downward spiral. Stfu already, Aviva! Damn woman

  9. 9
    labowner
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 9:46 am

    Derek, you go up to Sonja and ask her that and get back to us.

  10. 10
    cloudsinmycoffee
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 10:21 am

    Aviva’s snooty ass monotone makes me want to hurl furniture out of windows. Bitch you grew up in a small burb in Upstate NY, relax the fake Upper East Side shit. Ugh.

    Heather still reminds me of Bruce the shark from Shark’s Tale

    Sonja and Ramona are the two drunken aunts you wanted to sit next to at family dinners but never wanted to invite to your wedding.

    Carole, relax, we get it, you’re totally hip and cool and in touch with your Audrey Hepburn. Yeah, you’re sooo different. Do you eat breakfast in front of a closed Tiffanys at dawn too?

    LuAnn is as fake as Teresa’s frightening feather dress she wears in her talking head interviews. You were afraid that people would talk because you had a lovely conversation with Johnny Le-Pew? What kind of talking is that? I’m sure you were using the lips that were not on your face. I’ve done that talking before and it got me pregnant, twice!

    These chicks are amazingly ridiculous and hell in a handbasket I want to see the reunion.

  11. 11
    Sugarbush Sugarbush
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 10:25 am

    Oh boy, these tables certainly are turning for me. Aviva, the New Kelly, needs to go and I’m starting to like (gasp!) Heather. WTF? Ever since Heather stopped going after Ramona like a child, she’s started making a lot of sense and seems to be the only one who isn’t a total loon.

    Go, Sonja!! Way to make me like you more. That WAS classy. She held her own and took Aviva’s “apology” for what it was. I can’t stand people who think that everyone should simply forgive them for all the horrible things they do and/or say just because they said the words “I’m sorry” and if they aren’t forgiven, they flip the hell out and start digging their own grave even further.

  12. 12
    kthxbai kthxbai
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 11:06 am

    @RomoSheDiNT Noo! That’d be way too mean. Doesn’t Aviva have a real bad gum phobia?

  13. 13
    Gypsy Gypsy
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 11:27 am

    Like bubble gum or the ones that hold her teef in her mouth?

  14. 14
    RomoSheDiNT
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 12:25 pm

    Btw, Aviva has a bad memory, cough, isa liar… Her ass was left at the altar in Jamaica, mon.
    Ok, gotta go :-)

  15. 15
    mere2142
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 12:37 pm

    I like Heather too which at the start of the season I never dreamed I’d be saying that. She’s the only one who seems to rise above the childish name calling but still manages to call people on their shit.

    Avivia – STFU already about the fucking plane. I think it was Sonja who said, she flew on a plane, she didn’t split an atom!!

    Why is everyone so concerned about Lu and Frenchy and her admitting what happened with the Italians? They know this show is taped, right, and he’ll see whatever went down at some point?

    Ugh…I forgot how much I hate Mary-o. I enjoyed the break from him these last few episodes.

  16. 16
    labowner
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 12:58 pm

    What do we think about the Carol did George Clooney rumors?

  17. 17
    Ohiomom
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 1:04 pm

    Holla to everyone’s comments. I agree with too many to call them all out.

    Aviva is insufferable. I do not get it when Carole and Heather keep saying she is their girl. Whatever that means. They just met. Not like Samonja who have been friends for 20 + years.

    Aviva…SHUT UP. Samonja is not insecure. You are. You are an insecure mean girl.

  18. 18
    Gypsy Gypsy
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 1:23 pm

    And to think she’d drop the “B” word. Surprised she didn’t call it systematic and do a PSA on youtube too

  19. 19
    bubblesballentine
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 1:49 pm

    I didn’t know Vassar offered a degree in pulling the wings off of butterflies.

  20. 20
    TV Junkie
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 2:20 pm

    OMG love the Vassar comment!!!
    Aviva is such a bitch..so sick of her and her wimpy husband..and her sicko daddy…he is the worst ..almost..
    Sonja is a slut whore, but I loved the way she told Aviva..you are not my friend..even though Aviva is right sonja does have a drinking problem ..and Ramona loves it, bc ..1) she drinks Ramona’s shitty wine and 2) she makes ramona look less boozy..none of Ramona’s friends or husband are doing that bitch any favors..maybe one day Avery will send her to rehab..
    OK ..Lou..the pregency shit..you are too old ..does she have any idea what problems that baby may have BC of her age? I do not think she could handle a less than perfect child…she can’t even handle the kids she has….Kkids need time and attention and love..she may have the love for them..but that is it!! Lou you can not send a toddler to bording school!!!

  21. 21
    Ohiomom
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 2:47 pm

    So is Aviva going to start hanging out with Dr. Laura to make herself seem more reasonable?

  22. 22
    Mimo
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 3:12 pm

    So do we believe LuLu’s mom who said Lu had her tubes tied after the last kid or Lu who says her mom is just joking ’cause she wants to travel with Lu and not babysit?

  23. 23
    Holyterror
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 5:35 pm

    I wish I had that thing Javier Bardem used in “No Country For Old Men” to shoot a bolt through Aviva’s head. What a DRAG.

  24. 24
    kthxbai kthxbai
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 5:42 pm

    Dear Aviva,

    If you said something ugly you didn’t mean on purpose because you were mad, say that. Actually say that anyway.

    Because anything that just “slips out” was in there to begin with.

    There’s a difference between blowing a raspberry and not being able to hold in a fart.

  25. 25
    Holyterror
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 6:01 pm

    I grew up in New York and went to Vassar, and I absolutely can’t stand it that Aviva identifies herself as representative of either place. Fine to be a See You Next Tuesday, but please don’t drag an excellent college and one of the greatest cities in the world with you — you’re not representative of either place. Just. Shut. Up.

  26. 26
    2muchbravo
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 6:10 pm

    Aviva looks a WHOLE lot older than 41. Maybe it’s all those anxieties that’ll do it to you. She looks older than Ramona and she’s 50.

  27. 27
    annie Annie
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 7:04 pm

    AVIVA IS 41????? Eek!

    I am also joining the Heather love train……why Bravo, WHY do you make me do these things? :P

    Sonya looked pretty in her bed, dressed down, no makeup and not slurring her words. Very pretty :)

    I LOVED the foreign Charlie Day look-a-like. I missed who the hell he was though…..did he and Carole go out? He was cuuuuuuuute!

  28. 28
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted September 19, 2012 at 6:26 am

    I wish I could keep my composure like Sonja did when telling Aviva she was over her. I would have lost my mind if someone had called me names, gave a BS apology, then continue to tell me that my life was in a downward spiral and what I did on vacation was morally reprehensible.

    Who exactly are you Aviva to assess Sonja’s life?

    The scene where Sonja is fretting over what she is going to wear when she see’s Mr. Morgan is funny and sad. Funny because women do want to look good when they see their ex, sad because she was more concerned about that it seemed then what would be said at the court hearing. As if her looking great would make him forget the past few years and come back to her.

  29. 29
    cherrylipgloss
    Posted September 19, 2012 at 5:30 pm

    @kthxbai….about the carole comments….I keep thinking the same….I know she claims she’s on the downlow yet muses as she leaves the lunch table about no one following her….you know when you keep saying you don’t want to talk about something, aren’t you, in fact, talking about it???…. just a thought…..call me crazy

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