Holy shizzz, y’all! First of all, it was 1:45 in the morning before I even realized there was an episode tonight. Thank God for DVR, right? Eeesh. This was like Christmas, you can’t write this shit. Believe me, I’ve tried! Elaine pushed a “Big Brother” housemate in the pool and destroyed the DJ, Adriana punched Joanna in the face and then turned into a devil monkey, Marta got drunk and realized she could speak Spanish, and Lea turned into an ostrich. Here’s the skinny – it’s gonna be quick because I need to go the fuck to sleep.
Karen’t's dear, DEAR friend Beau got in Lea’s face because Lea (literally) may have passed him at a club at some point. Lea tries to deal with it in a sane manner, but Elaine isn’t getting enough camera time, so he gets in Beau’s face. Then Beau (who is a goddamn lunatic) gets thrown in the pool. The DJ equipment is splashed, stopping the music and Lisa goes nuts.
Part the Second – Joanna’s confirmed that Marta, who is SHWASTED, did indeed sleep with Joe Francis. Totally incensed, Jo catches sight of Marysol’s maybe-fur and has to be physically restrained from confronting the PR Maven. She keeps from blowing her top just long enough to see Adriana confront Karen’t – she gets in the middle to try and stop Adriana from “bullying” Karen’t, and Adriana does NOT like that. Things escalate to the point between Adriana and Joanna that Adriana feels the need to walk away, but Jo’s so far off the deep end that she follows Adriana. Then Adriana’s so far off the deep end she punches Joanna in the face! It’s fucking crazy! It might be fake because no one even thinks about calling the cops which is exactly what I would do! It’s terrible and awful and kind of great at the same time. I feel many things at once.
See you… Wednesday for the recap?