Minicap: The A-List: Dallas

Someday I will be on Inside the Actors Studio!

Howdy, Gasmii!  That was quite the ep this week, wasn’t it?

First, Chase and Levi went to a driving range that serves cocktails.  Alcohol + golf clubs + projectiles hit at high speed = genius!  Chase offered funding for Inchwear, but Levi was hesitant.

Then there was a fashion show at the Audubon center, which Zygote, Mo, Chase, Phillip and Ashley attended.  Ashley was — well, orange.  In a dress that was way too tight. In a bra that seemed padded.  Looking 10 years older than she is.  And orange.  Take a look:

So you’re starring in a remake of The Manchurian Candidate?

Ashley and Chase discuss relationships.  Chase says he’s ok with being hurt if that means he’s putting himself out there.  Chase then starts to cry a little and says he wants a really good relationship.

News flash:  it won’t be with this guy.

We then go to Ashley and Zygote, who are having a bible study.  This ends with Ashley praying that God will give Zyg a “heart facial” and her a “heart pedicure”.  I want an “ear enema” after hearing that.

Now Chore has decided acting sounds like fun, and he’s auditioning for a film.  I’m not sure what kind of film this is, or what his role would be.  The audition consists of dancing and coming on to a chubby guy, and later talking about how chubby guys turn him on.  Honey, a “film” with no script, no blocking, no plot and nothing except hot guys dancing around a chunky guy isn’t a film you want to be associated with.

Nudies, that’s what they are!

Later, Ashley recruits people to help at a horse refuge in San Antonio, which is being affected by wildfires.  The horses have to be relocated, or at least that’s what I heard.   Oh, and in talking to Zygote she brings up Chase/Levi.  Just to get Zyg worked up.  Guess that heart pedicure hasn’t happened yet.

And now we come to Chase and Levi.  Chase is wearing that godawful red and white striped monstrosity of a top we’ve seen before.  Can no one slip into his home, raid his closet and burn the damned thing?  Levi is going to San Antonio, but Chase has a wedding and can’t go with Levi.  Chase suggests in jest that Levi and Zyg share a room.

Spoiler alert . . .

Zygote, Ashley, Levi, Phillip and Chore head to San Antonio.  As you’d expect from his maturity level, Zyg spends a lot of time complaining and not working.  That evening, everyone except Phillip heads to a Mexican restaurant.  Levi and Zyg get into it almost immediately, trading insults.

Levi leaves the table, Chore and Ashley walk back to their rooms, and we see Levi and Zyg walking along the river.  I assume it’s the Rio Grande, because Zyg asks Levi if “rio” means “large”.  Yeah, it’s the Large Large river.  Dumbass.  And now we yet again hear Zyg bring up the “monogamously dating” remark.  Blah blah – hey, they’re kissing!  And going back to Levi’s room.  Wow, no one ever saw that coming.

And finally, we’re with Chase and Levi, some time after San Antonio.  Chase asks how things went, and Levi gives vague replies.  Chase calls Zyg a person he doesn’t trust and a backstabber.  Just like Levi, then?

Levi will break your heart just like you’re breaking that breadstick.

Lots more in my full recap, in a couple of days.  Until then, catch up with last week here.

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