MiniCap: The Real Housewives of New Jersey

18 Comments

1. 1
   June Summer
   Posted June 13, 2011 at 11:26 pm

   Melissa LOVES Jesus but she does not know the words to Amazing Grace?
   Maybe “a wench like me” was a Freudian slip.

2. 2
   sarcasatire
   Posted June 14, 2011 at 1:00 am

   @June, exactly! I thought the same thing! “A ‘wench’ like me” was hilarious! My only thoughts were that Amazing Grace is one of those ‘free domain’ songs, that one can sing on TV and not owe any royalty fees. Kinda like the “ABC’s.” Althoug, Melissa may have had trouble with that one, as well.

   Sorry, Gia. You’re cute, sweet, and a minor, but even I wouldn’t spend the dough for gymnastics lessons, considering you came in 7th in your group…of seven people. I loved how Joe Giudice, every time Gia messed up, was like, “Is she supposed to do that?” Nope. Tre said she was distracted, which is Mom-speak for ‘untalented.’ What kid isn’t distracted? It’s like they are all born with ADD but only the lucky ones get medicated. But it doesn’t matter because everyone gets a prize! Gymnastic tournaments are like Baby Communism. No matter how talented you are, everyone gets the same size trophy.

3. 3
   Where's My Coffee?
   Posted June 14, 2011 at 4:50 am

   “Listen! Mommy’s singing!” Was such a BS set up. When my kids were little, I sang TO them, not in some other room whilst hanging up dresses. Melissa’s singing sounded like a cat in heat, and I think everyone is sick of these housewives trying to launch singing careers.

   I don’t think it’s cool to bag on a 9 year old for her gymnastics performance, but I will say that I thought it was very sweet that the extended family really seemed to care enough to be there for her. Even though they’re all a bunch of aholes, they’re pretty good about supporting the kids (when they’re not fighting in front of them lol).

   It seriously must be nice to walk into a radio station with no experience and suggest an on-air job for yourself. These women are handed amazing opportunities that just don’t happen in the real world.

   Chris and Jacqueline solidified their standing as the stupidest parents in America for buying Assley that car. How will she pay for gas? Parking in the city? No doubt she’ll default on the loan within a few months. No doubt at all.

4. 4
   baymenxpac
   Posted June 14, 2011 at 7:23 am

   i don’t know why everyone is hatin’ on the pirates of the caribbean remix of “amazing grace”…

5. 5
   trkaelin
   Posted June 14, 2011 at 8:35 am

   I about spit out my drink when I heard her sing “wench”. I didn’t think I heard it correctly at first. Give that woman a recording contract!!! Can’t be worse than the Cuntess and def no worse than Kim.

6. 6
   2Hyper
   Posted June 14, 2011 at 9:22 am

   @sarcastire: You are a mother after my own heart! I am not one of those mothers who applaud a child for just participating! Thats why other countries’ children are more driven that American kids. There is no A for effort; thats not how the world works! I hate children’s recitals, sports game for children under the age of 5. Its always a hot mess. Its not cute to applaud them for looking awkward and uncoordinated; its just plain mean! Yes, I will support my children in whatever they choose to do but I am not going to tell them its okay if they suck at it; either try harder or find another hobby.

7. 7
   NotWithoutMyTV
   Posted June 14, 2011 at 9:36 am

   Children should be seen and not heard. Until they reach the age of 14, and you inform them of the apprenticeship you’ve found for them, and they say “Thank you, sir. I will try not to bring dishonor to the family name.”

8. 8
   2muchbravo
   Posted June 14, 2011 at 9:57 am

   I guess you could say I’m on board with that. It kind of gets in my craw that they have “graduations” for everything these days. Having kindergarten, elementary and jr. high “graduations” takes away from the importance of the actual high school graduation. That is an accomplishment more so than you can count to twenty and learn to stand in line by prs. I don’t necessarily agree with the tiger parents but kids DO need to learn that everyone doesn’t win in life. You’re not always going to get a trophy just for showing up to class in college or at work. People need to learn how to fail. Not by humiliation but realistically. Celebrate real victoriess. If you suck and don’t win or place, practice more don’t just say, “Oh well, I’ll get a trophy anyway so why bother.” That’s what we’re breeding these days.

9. 9
   NotWithoutMyTV
   Posted June 14, 2011 at 10:10 am

   I’ve read articles and columns by child development experts that basically agree with you. If we throw a celebration for everything, kids grow up unprepared for the real world which is sort of a fight to keep yourself in one piece, emotionally. I read one column by a soccer mom who just sick of all the baking–cupcakes for this, cookies for that, baked goods for the kid’s fund drives, etc.

10. 10
    NotWithoutMyTV
    Posted June 14, 2011 at 10:12 am

    Come to think of it, you get children like Ashley. Who Jacquline should have eaten soon after her birth.

11. 11
    lOS ANGELES 1993
    Posted June 14, 2011 at 11:57 am

    Im sorry but Melissa is fugly as fug, that nose ick. You’d think her “rich” husband could have paid for some sugery.

12. 12
    2Hyper
    Posted June 14, 2011 at 3:31 pm

    @2muchbravo: True story… In El Paso, all schools were banned from having graduations other than high school graduations. A few years ago, the drop out rate skyrocketed because the students were thinking they “graduated” from 5th grade or 8th grade and they did not need to return to school. Since El Paso has a large Mexican immigrant population, I guess something was being lost in the translation and the families thought it meant something to graduate from 5h/8th grade and would tell them it was not necessary to go to high school. The school district had to step in and put the kibosh on all graduations once they realized what was going on…. its hilarious and sad at the same time! I am still crossing my fingers that this become a statewide policy by the time my kids get to kindergarten. A kindergarten graduation, complete with cap and gown, is beyond ridiculous!

    I have also kiboshed annual birthday parties at my house. This idea of spending large sums of money and having outrageous parties for children that have no concept of money is also ridiculous. I am only willing to do a party every 5 yrs. Children these days take everything for granted because things that were special in our lifetime have now become normal day occurences. I am not so coldhearted that we dont celebrate their birthday, but I am sure as shit will not be spending hundreds of dollars for something they wont remember or care about. I’ve told my kids they better stay friends with the kids that have huge birthday parties every year bcuz that’s the only way its going to happen in their world.

    This is the type of shit that riles me up!!!!!!!

13. 13
    sarcasatire
    Posted June 14, 2011 at 3:53 pm

    LOL @ 2Hyper. I’m glad you guys feel the same way and I’m not the only one who doesn’t think we should reward people/children just for showing up. Flipit brought up a good point on Padgasm. (He says he’s visiting his parents but is really in Texas watching Nick Jr with his niece, so he’s become an expert on the subject.) You know how on shows like Dora the Explorer, they ask the audience a question, pause for a few seconds, and then pretend like everyone watching got it right? What’s up with that? My baby isn’t a year and a half old yet and while she likes Dora, I can’t help but wonder what the long term effects of these methods are. Dora says, “We need to go the mountain. Can you point to the mountain?” Rhys stares blankly at the screen and a few seconds later is rewarded with a “That’s right! You found the mountain!”
    (Is it wrong if the next time that happens, I look my baby square in the eye and say, “No, you didn’t!”) Kidding! But sometimes, I point to the mountain and answer enthusiastically so she can think Dora is talking to me for answering correctly. Don’t know how long I can keep up this charade, but I’m at a loss..because all of the shows do this now. Ni Hao Kai Lan, The Upside Down Show, even Yo Gabba Gabba sometimes.. what’s a mom to do?

14. 14
    Jazzy
    Posted June 14, 2011 at 4:11 pm

    Hahahahaha Sarcasatire – thanks for the laugh! That’s great that you point to the mountain and act all excited for your baby’s benefit! My advice – stick to Sesame Street – they don’t do as much of that stuff if I remember correctly.
    But I must speak up in defense of gymnastics. My younger daughter is a competitive gymnast and it’s not easy. They usually don’t give trophies to everyone – she has walked away from meets empty handed. Sometimes they will give trophies to the top all-arounders and medals to the top finishers on each event. The meet that Gia was in seems like it was a small one since there didn’t seem to be that many kids in her age division. It might have been just their gym – what sometimes they call a mock meet or practice meet. That could be why they all got something. Believe me, to compete in gymnastics at all takes a lot of hard work. (if you don’t believe me, try learning a cartwheel on the beam – it ain’t easy!!)

15. 15
    2Hyper
    Posted June 14, 2011 at 6:36 pm

    Girl, I am in Nick Jr. purgatory every single night. I am committed to at least watching tv with the kiddos so I can monitor content and they are not zombies but I think I am slowly going dumb.

16. 16
    Nikki Hughes
    Posted June 14, 2011 at 6:55 pm

    Is it wrong if the next time that happens, I look my baby square in the eye and say, “No, you didn’t!”

    bwaahahahahahaha

17. 17
    pantsonfire
    Posted June 14, 2011 at 10:20 pm

    Letting your kids experience diappointment is your JOB as a parent. You are doing a disservice by depriving a developing personality of a valid learning experience. Failure is a good thing, it motivates us to find the correct path. This whole generation is kind of scaring me…….The will not be able to deal with life.

18. 18
    shana
    Posted June 16, 2011 at 6:17 am

    I agree about the idea of over celebrating every little event as being counterproductive, however, please do not knock the accomplishments of the very young. Today, at your mature age, standing in line and counting to twenty is easy (well I hope so–although some adults in the 10 items or less checkout lanes need re-teaching on both scores), but for a small child controlling their bodies, learning to follow directions and respect other people’s needs, desires, and personal space is a huge accomplishment. Counting to twenty and understanding that each number represents an entity is the fundamentals of math, without which they could not later graduate high school. The El Paso situation sounded like a language barrier issue as well as a misunderstanding about the importance of education–not too many graduations.

    @pantsonfire

    Actually, teaching your children how to handle failure and cope with disappointment is your job as a parent, not just watching them struggle needlessly so they have lots of “life experiences”. The reason most parents try to avoid exposing their children to extra stress has to do with studies showing that, children who experience high levels of stress when they are younger will become stressed out and full of anxiety much quicker when facing obstacles as adults.
    Children will experience disappointment in life no matter what you do, you need not look for any extra opportunities. Teaching children how to triumph in success and regroup from a loss–those are the jobs of a mentor, and most adults do not seem to be able to handle the stress of either themselves, let alone be able to teach it to the next generation.

    @ Sarcasatire,

    If the show is asking your child to participate but your child is too young to follow the instructions–then the show is too advanced for your child. Dora is aimed at toddlers, your child is still under two. Stick with Baby Einstein for now.