Minicap: The Voice

This is what we like to call a “walking oxymoron”

You see that kid up there? He’s the first in a bunch of wow-they-don’t-sound-like-they-look performers from this evening’s set of blind auditions on The Voice. Some are good, some are not-so-good but not-so-bad as to be painful to listen to.  The judges fight and bicker like a married couple … okay a married couple with four people which would probably help explain the bickering, and though Adam only pushes his button four times this episode, he lands all four singers he was after.

Also in this episode, Carson Daly making surprise deliveries to contestants and showing off the GPS system in his Kia. Now look, I know this is a reality show and all, but can we really stop calling it a surprise visit? The cameras are already there before Carson even shows up. These guys know they’re getting an invite. There is no element of surprise. Just to prove this, we get a lady who gives us an Emmy-winning performance of Fake Surprised, and her coworkers give us an Emmy-worthy performance of Pretending to Give A Shit. Let’s just stop with the fake pretense, okay?

As far as the kid up there, his name is Pip. Pip’s parents obviously hate him with every fiber of their being, either that or they’ve got a secret boner for Dickens. Poor Pip doesn’t realize the only person who is qualified to wear a bowtie and look amazing in it is the Doctor, but we’ll forgive him because the voice that comes out of his mouth is waaaay not what you’d expect. Also included in this week’s episode, Christina bickering incessantly with Adam and Blake, and Cee-Lo being smooth with the ladies … even the ladies he didn’t bother turning around for. And lots of gratuitous shots of Cee-Lo petting his cat, which is apparently either code for Cee-Lo being an evil mastermind, or Cee-Lo being very, very nice to kitties.

When all is said and done, Blake, Christina, and Cee Lo have six contestants apiece, and Adam’s managed to nab seven. Keep in mind, these guys are supposed to be picking out twelve contestants each, so unless there are a multitude of amazing singers in the next episode, we may see some of those turned-down people return for a second chance at a spot. And given how much time we’ve spent on the losers back stories, that is far more likely than you’d think.

I’ll be back with the full recap in a day or two — until then, take a minute and catch up on last week’s recap!

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