Blogging the Spelling Bee!

Miscellaneous TV

By B-Side | Thursday, June 1, 2006 | 10:47 am | 39 Comments

spellingbeeSo I turn on the TV this morning, and what do I find? The Scripps National Spelling Bee!! Every year, I miss this thing. I always find out about it after the fact. Luckily, ABC and ESPN have decided to finally exploit the event, which means awareness of it has been upped to previously unheard of levels. What better way to celebrate than by liveblogging the last hour of the Preliminary Championship Round…10:57 AM
Only 29 contestants left! Round six is beginning! Engage!

11:00 AM
Evan O’Dorney is an alleged “elite speller.” But can he get “antilegomena”? He does! Amazing. These kids are like robots. Next up is Tia Thomas. She gets saddled with a relatively easy word, “Theremin.” It’s probably the only word I’ll ever be able to spell in one of these bees. Ah, but she gets it wrong! She spells it “Theramin.” Haha, sucker! Next time show up when you feel like SPELLING A WORD. Smell ya later, TIA THOMAS!!

11:07 AM
Here comes Leslie Newcombe, one of many hunched over girls with Edna Mode hairstyles. The judge warns her that this next word has a homonym. Oh, nice twist! The word, by the way, is Dhole. But Edna says Dohl. Suck it, Leslie! Return to your hovel of SHAME!

11:10 AM
Enter Kayla Hudson. Her word is Raita. She looks like she’s about to suffer from a panic attack. Seriously, she might die right there on the stage. She lets out a nervous laugh and then proceeds to misspell the word. Damn girl. Have you never been to an Indian Restaurant??

11:11 AM
Next is a young boy named Allion Salvador. I like this kid because he clutches onto the microphone like he’s Chris Daughtry. And he’s just as dreamy too!

allion

11:15 AM
Here comes Theodore Yuan. He admits that he’s actually a bigger fan of math than spelling. Well, if you like math so much, why don’t you marry it???

11:16 AM
Oooh! It’s Bonny Jain! The reigning Geography Bee champ. He says, “Oh oh oh yeah. Obliviscence!” as if he’d just been talking about it. I guess he had just been talking about it because he gets the word right. The sportscaster says, “Bonny Jain! Competition Veteran!!!” Yes, yes. We’re all impressed with Bonny Jain.

11:20 AM
Okay, this girl’s name is a spelling bee unto itself: Aishwarya Pastapur. Her word is “Suivez,” which is the French command for “Follow!” Oh, but Aishwarya gets it wrong! She says “Suivet.” Her parents will now flog her.

11:23 AM
Here comes Rajiv Tarigopula. ESPN says we should definitely keep an eye on him. Consider it done! I’m on the Rajiv bandwagon!

11:24 AM
The word is “Zebu.” When Rajiv asks for it to be used in a sentence, the judge offers up this strange image: “Yasmine used to ride on her family’s Zebu when she was small. Now she milks it every morning instead.” Why does that sound so inappropriate?

11:26 AM
Every now and then, I like to attempt to spell these words in my head. I’ve since come to the realization that I am an IDIOT.

11:27 AM
Scratch that. I totally got “Fauve” right! I’m a GENIUS!

11:29 AM
Another kid messes up. His little sister looks absolutely crushed. Tonight’s Applebees dinner will be super awkward.

11:32 AM
FYI: nine girls left. Fifteen boys left. Haha. Boys rule!

11:32 AM
Saryn Hooks is all about the attitude. The word is “Burin,” and she asks, “Is that a knife or something?” Hey, don’t act like you’re too cool for the Burin.

11:34 AM
Here’s another kid with an attitude. When he finds out that his word means “remains of the dead,” he smirks and says, “Remains of the dead?” as if the judges are crazy for coming up with that definition. What’s up with the ego on these kids? Either way, he gets the word right and fist pounds someone. He’s like The Fonz of spelling bees.

11:37 AM
Oh Cherry Mathis! Two L’s. Two L’s! Alas, this is the end of the line for Cherry.

11:41 AM
Uh oh! Twenty seconds left for Nidharshan Anandasivam! Will he get “Reboise”? This is the most exciting twenty seconds of the past week. He gets it at the last second! Oh, Nidharshan! The rollercoaster ride you insist on always taking us on!

11:46 AM
Controversy! The word is “Sterlet,” but the kid slurs his second-to-last letter. Did he say “e” or did he say “o”? The judges are conferring, listening to the playback of the audio. Meanwhile, poor Anji’s lip is quivering with fear. And now head judge Mary Brooks returns with a verdict: DING! She slams that bell as if to say, “You are wrong and I hate you for it, dick!”

marybrookes

11:53 AM
The ever inflating Chris Connelly babbles to us about the kids’ courage. He tells us that some of these spellers will eventually be one of our surgeons. Oh Chris Connelly. Your wit beguiles me!

11:54 AM
The judge says the word “Boraginaceous,” and a kid named Jonathan Horton says, “Uhhhh what did you say??” The audience erupts in laughter. The judge reprimands him and says, “Listen to the beginning.” The word “Boraginaceous” is then said about forty-five times in the next thirty seconds. By the way, Jonathan Horton is hilarious. He yells/spells about two words at a time, turns to his right, and blows on his hands. Somehow this works. He actually gets it right. How very Boraginaceous.

11:59 AM
Remember elite speller Evin O’Dorney? Well, he just got cut. Sorry, little dude. I feel bad for him. His mother is a vision of utter disappointment. All her dreams: gone!

12:01 PM
Another girl is eliminated. Her mom shrugs with sadness and defeat, as if to say, “I guess I owe Thelma $35 dollars now.”

12:02 PM
Okay, Allion, a.k.a. Christ Daughtry is back. This time he only has one hand on the mic. I wonder if he’ll sing Live!

12:04 PM
Allion gets his word without even breaking a sweat. DREAMBOAT!

12:05 PM
You know what would really spice this up? Mandisa coming out to sing a song.

12:07 PM
Remember Bonny Jain? He starts spelling Empyreumatic, but midway through, he freezes up. After a long pause, he continues, but omits an “e.” Battle ax Mary Brooks slowly raises her hand over her bell and then, in dramatic form, SHE STRIKES! FEEL THE STING OF HER DING!

12:10 PM
Poor Samir. It’s all over for him. When he gets his word wrong, his mother recoils as if she’s just been stung in the butt. The shame… the shame… Only 16 left now.

12:12 PM
The commentator says that Aishwarya will be a “force to be reckoned with.” And how! Behold, mortal humans, Aishwarya comes this way!!

12:13 PM
Oooh! Rajiv! I’m on his bandwagon. Although, I have to admit that I’m turning into more of an Allion guy. If it comes down to the two of them, I will be torn.

12:15 PM
Here comes Katharine Close. I like to think of her as an aspiring Hope Davis / Sarah Chalke hybrid. She gets her word right. Just as Hope Davis and Sarah Chalke would, I’m sure.

12:18 PM
The word is “Joual.” The kid starts off by spelling it with a “Z.” Yeah, bad news. He’s cut, and the commentator says, “He had never seen or heard that before.” CLEARLY.

12:23 PM
Cocky Charley Allegar is back. I love this guy’s “I’m the shit” attitude. He’ll make a perfect candidate for Beauty and the Geek 8. Unfortunately, he’s forgotten the word. Bad sign. But he gets it! Geez these kids are insane.

12:24 PM
Grrrrowl! Caitlin Campbell. She’s the hottie of the bunch. She’s sort of like a bug-eyed version of Melinda from Real World: Austin. She’s totally going to make out with Charley afterwards.

12:27 PM
Uh oh. Young Samir is using “Bonus Time.” He’s so screwed! Will he ever be able to spell eremacausis? I’m thinking no. Only 30 seconds left. The judge says, “Samir, it’s finish time.” Indeed. It is finish time. As in, Samir is finished. He gets it wrong, the crowd sighs loudly, and everyone applauds loudly. Apparently he was a favorite to win the whole thing. What an upset! Just goes to show, every vote counts! Wait, sorry, I’m still in Idol mode.

12:32 PM
Round seven is over. Thirteen spellers left! And they do not include favorite Samir Patel! What in the world will happen? I guess we’ll just have to wait. Round eight begins tonight on ABC at 8 PM…

It’s been fun. Time for lunch!

About

39 Comments

  1. 1
    QCB
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 11:05 am

    “I like this kid because he clutches onto the microphone like he’s Chris Daughtry.”

    I can now say that I have spit water on my computer from laughter. Thank you B-Side ;>

  2. 2
    hannahthehun
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 11:05 am

    Damn, I’m missing the spelling bee?!?

  3. 3
    HicksPub
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 11:13 am

    I’ve been watching the live updates on the web for the last couple of hours and then suddenly, B-Side, you’re here too? I’m torn: have I become tragically hip or have you accidentally fallen into my Well of Dorkness? Either way, I’m on the floor twitching and slobbering like a centox nerve gas victim.

  4. 4
    jeff
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 11:21 am

    The Rajiv bandwagon?

    Does that mean you have the Rajiver?

  5. 5
    shakeit
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 11:22 am

    When I saw this was on i thought “tvgasm should totally cover the spelling bee.”

    I was going to say that these people made me feel absolutely GIDDY about being a math nerd in school… damn you Theodore Yuan!

  6. 6
    ldini79
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 11:32 am

    yes! i have been a HUGE fan since the crazy euonym girl (remember her?)

    spellbound kicks akila and the bee and bee season’s ass, i highly recommend it to all of the other spelling bee fans out there.

  7. 7
    helltotheno
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 11:33 am

    Oh I remember that girl

    What ever happened to her? Maybe she is making sweet love with a fellow spelling bee-er

  8. 8
    Franuary
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 11:36 am

    I can’t believe I’m missing the spelling bee! Please tell me you’ll be live-blogging or at least recapping the finals tonight.

  9. 9
    hannahthehun
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 11:47 am

    Is that the girl who used to get so worked up that she couldn’t sit on the stage with the rest of the other kids? She was hilarious.

  10. 10
    minda07
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 11:57 am

    Wow I never knew a spelling bee could be so much fun, I find myself glued! My question is this … Where is Akheela?

  11. 11
    Mark
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 12:11 pm

    WTH is a wapiti?

  12. 12
    sophiemuffin
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 1:03 pm

    an elk.

  13. 13
    doctorsnark
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 1:27 pm

    b-side:
    is the word “corybantic” (used in a sentence:”b-side’s recap of the spelling bee induced a fit of corybantic laughter”) from the greek? or is it of latin origin?

  14. 14
    laughterkey
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 2:57 pm

    FEEL THE STING OF HER DING! Holy GOD that’s good stuff, my friend.

  15. 15
    helltotheno
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 3:29 pm

    Why are these kids all 11 in the 7th grade? I think I was 13 at the end of 7th grade.

  16. 16
    RMMommy
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 3:34 pm

    Awwww poor Samir. He was our local champ. When he won for the fourth year in a row, he handed his prize (a dictionary) to the second place winner and said…I already have three.

    I felt the sting of the ding as a child in Kansas where the twit pronounced “garage” more like the British pronounciation which rhymes with carriage. Curses to her and her bell!

  17. 17
    jeff
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 3:43 pm

    Helltotheno:

    Because they’re smart? (take that as you will…)

  18. 18
    Lizardqueen
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 4:03 pm

    This is such an awesome show. I’ll never forget crazy ass Rebecca Sealfon(sp?). She was like a walking Asperger Syndrome public service announcement. E!!!! U!!!! O!!!! N!!!! Y!!!! M!!!!

    GO awkward homeschoolers!!!!

  19. 19
    zoobabe
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 5:58 pm

    I’m watching the finals right now. These kids are riveting! The last home-schooled kid just went out.

  20. 20
    tvtvtv
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 6:02 pm

    Aw, this reminds me of Spellbound and poor little hyper Harry, my favoritest kid ever:

    http://www.filmforum.org/archivedfilms/spellbound/spell8sm.jpg

    What’s up with all the French and critter-related words?

    I kinda hope no celebrities were watching…otherwise you know we’re gonna end up with a bouncing little Zebu Cruise, Dhole Pitt-Jolie or Raita Paltrow-Martin.

  21. 21
    zoobabe
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 6:32 pm

    The three finalists are all girls. Girls RULE!!!

  22. 22
    the_canuck
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 6:37 pm

    Oh my god, this is so addictive.

    I love myself some Rajiv, if I must say so. Although the guy with the glasses who barks every letter and always stares at the floor is awesome too.

  23. 23
    annna
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 6:40 pm

    only 2 more left! only 2 more left!

  24. 24
    zoobabe
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 6:45 pm

    New Jersey vs. Canada!!!

  25. 25
    zlata
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 6:49 pm

    Come on, O Canada!!! HASTE will abolish those who misspell…

    I’m still upset about Chris Daughtry’s elimination, I’m never watching the Bee again!

  26. 26
    annna
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 6:58 pm

    new jersey for the win with URSPRACHE!

  27. 27
    zoobabe
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 7:02 pm

    Tony Soprano would be proud!

  28. 28
    hannahthehun
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 7:06 pm

    Woo-hoo, girls rule!

  29. 29
    mangos
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 8:09 pm

    I watched this at work today, and I am so embarassed to say that I actually LIKED it, and was pissed that they didn’t do it all at once because I wasn’t going to be home to watch the end of it tonight. Man, who knew the spelling bee was so entertaining?

  30. 30
    anonym.
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 9:17 pm

    so, what do you think the parents do to these kids when they misspell the words? i can just picture a conversation:
    “you made me take off from work at the A.C. Moore for a week to drag your sorry ass to this contest and you can’t even spell ‘antidisestablishmentarianism’? you’ve got to be fucking kidding me!”

  31. 31
    shank
    Posted June 1, 2006 at 10:30 pm

    Wow, I sure picked the right day to stay home sick and watch ESPN. This shit was insane. I’ve never seen so many nerdy homeschooled kids who list ‘math’ among their interests.

  32. 32
    Jess
    Posted June 2, 2006 at 7:11 am

    My nephew was in the semi-finals locally. If he’d won that one, he would have gone on to the National Bee. It was so exciting to go to a middle school auditorium at 9am Saturday morning to watch little kids spell…I can’t imagine what it’d feel like to be there. Anyway, we watched the finals last night and had a blast. Best part was when the girl asked the language of origin for “weldenschmerz”. Uhhh….

    Awesome liveblog, as always. “I wonder if he’ll sing Live!”

  33. 33
    Jess
    Posted June 2, 2006 at 7:13 am

    “I can’t imagine what it’d feel like to be there….at the National Spelling Bee finals” (more coffee = complete thoughts)

  34. 34
    AbbyAnn
    Posted June 2, 2006 at 8:05 am

    I had no idea that the American national spelling bee was open to people from other English-speaking countries. When that Fiona girl started singing O Canada, I was really confused! I was glad that she and Kerry Close did so well in the finals. How bizarre is it that I don’t know these kids, have no reason to care about the spelling bee outcome, yet I got nervous each time they paused while spelling a word?

  35. 35
    B-Side
    Posted June 2, 2006 at 8:51 am

    I just couldn’t believe that Finola messed up by spelling that German word with a “V” instead of a “W”. She’s probably kicking herself for that one.

    I was also sad to see Saryn cut. After she was reinstated, she was the storybook winner. Oh well.

  36. 36
    Lisa
    Posted June 2, 2006 at 9:19 am

    I think Saryn was trying way too hard… she had her hair curled at the ends, a little too much makeup for a 13 year old… come on now, we all know you’re a nerd, just embrace it.

    I was cheering for Finola at the end, because she didn’t even hesitate on any words until her last one (which she totally should have known was a W and not a V) and also because she sort of looked like Winnie Cooper. I did love that kid who blew in his hand — when he said, “I have no clue” on his last word, that was hilarious.

    Anybody else seen the Broadway show The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee? They were scarily accurate with their characters, and it made this Bee even funnier to me.

  37. 37
    Samynoodle
    Posted June 2, 2006 at 9:34 am

    Did anyone else notice the high frequency of little mustaches the boys have? And the best part was when they recapped the “hijinx” of last year’s bee. You know hat big goofy kid who asked if the chickens have large talons totally got $5 from his brother and a slap backside his head from his mom.

  38. 38
    FCN
    Posted June 2, 2006 at 7:52 pm

    Allion Salvador aka. chris daughtry goes to my school. he is in my 8th grade engineering class. he is one of my friends. u dont have to believe me but he is. i was interviewed by channel 10 news and was on the 11 oclock news that night. allion is a really nice kid and i think hes AWESOME!!! my name is lauren cooley i go to westminster academy with him…i can answer all your questions about him just post a question and i will answer back with the info. later- lauren cooley

  39. 39
    ILUVMTV
    Posted June 2, 2006 at 8:18 pm

    lauren cooley…you should have a talk with your parents about giving up too much information to strangers…looks like westminster academy isnt teaching you much…

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