Error: Twitter did not respond. Please wait a few minutes and refresh this page.
Bisexual, penetrating loving Scrabble players > strippers
You’ll recall her disastrous date with her ex, AB, last week. If you don’t, he’s the guy who moved to Saudi Arabia without telling her. The scenes of Amy at her matchmaking job call to mind a second-rate Patti Stanger. If Patti is the US Weekly of matchmaking, Amy is definitely the Star magazine. Amy shares some more of her sage rules: dating a younger guy is a waste of time, and don’t go on a date the same day a guy asks you. Also, randomly, no one wants to date someone with a cat. She says her rules override any stupidity that comes with thinking you’re in love. Oh you mean like when you thought AB was going to tell you he made a mistake and wanted to move back from Saudi Arabia and marry you? Okay.
We are treated to a fascinating scene of Amy at the gym. Someone named Lewis calls her, but Amy whines that he’s younger than her, and dopey too. He asks her out that night. Recall two of the rules she JUST discussed: no younger guys, no going out on the same day you’re asked. Logically, she says yes. Her trainer overhears this whole thing and calls her desperate at the exact same time I’m saying it out loud. In other news, my bottle of wine is getting low, and I’m not sure I can make it through the rest of this episode without it.
“NEVER, under any circumstances, date a younger guy. Especially one who asks you out the same day. Hang on, one’s calling me right now. ;- )”
Amy prepares for her date with the younger guy who asked her out earlier that same day. I must say Lewis he is hot! Well done, Bravo casting people, well done. He takes her ice skating. Amy scoffs that she hasn’t been skating since age 12, but she’s going out with a 12 year old, so it’s okay. Amy has the mentality of a 9 year old, so what does it matter? Besides, I think ice skating is such a cute date idea.
Does Lewis know what roller skates are? What about a Walkman? Amy keeps driving home the point that she’s older than him. Dude shut up! HE asked YOU out! Or at the very least signed a contract with HRG to semi-tolerate you for an evening.
After the skating, they go to eat at the rink’s restaurant. Amy cries that she’ll have to run extra tomorrow because she’s drinking hot chocolate (which she sends back because it has whipped cream). She’s horrified when Lewis suggests they order chicken pot pie. I’m not a guy, but I can imagine there’s nothing more attractive than a girl who’s terrified to consume an extra calorie. Bonus points when a person acts like this on the first date. I’m not perfect, but when it comes to eating on dates, I’m down with getting multiple apps, an entree, dessert, and drinks. And then possibly stopping for McDonald’s later.
Throughout this meal (although it looks like they never ended up ordering food), Emily keeps talking about fat, clogged arteries, and the like. Such a turn on! She cheers-es with the hot chocolate to “not thinking” about the amount of calories she’s drinking. Amy interviesw that she only went out with Lewis for practice, but now she really likes him for no apparent reason other than he gave her the time of day for a few hours. As they’re leaving, she says that was fun!……..right? Where is your confidence, girl!?
Some time later, we learn Amy hasn’t heard from Lewis in several days, BUT, per the rules of The Victorian Woman’s Guide to Dating (copyright 1910), women should NEVER initiate contact with a man. So — LMAO — in the next scene, we see her calling Lewis and leaving a rambling, awkward message. How this woman manages to get dressed in the morning, let alone own a business, is a mystery to me. My wine is almost empty, so it’s a question I can’t really give that much thought at the moment.