Models Of The Runway: Cat Fight!!! Yeah, Right.

Time for yet another week of Models of the Runway. Excited?

 

Glad to see we’re all on the same page. 

I don’t know why we always have to start out rewatching the end of the eliminations. Is there anyone that would only watch this show and skip Project Runway? Anyone? That’s what I thought.

Anyway, Lorena and Kristina are happy to see their designers make it through, and Monique is sad that Flamingay is owt. I’m sad too. So we’re left with Mila and Jaysian on the runway. Are you just dying to know what’s going to happen?  No? Why? Oh, because YOU ALREADY SAW IT. 

 

Mirror, Mirror, on the wall……Who’s designer has the wonkiest eyes of all? 

Well of course the answer is Mila! She will be going to Bryant Park.

 

Yay Me! 

Not so fast there, Old Eyes. You can’t get rid of Brittany that easily. Jaysian is going to Bryant Park too.

 

Huh??? 

Brittany’s so excited, she tries to suffocate herself.

No wonder she gets along with Jaysian so well, they’re both into auto-asphyxiation.

 

I know all there is to know about the choking game……. 

We see Heidi telling them that even though they will both design collections, only one of them will show in Bryant Park. Old Eyes is confident it will be Mila; Brittany knows it will be Jaysian. Old Eyes thinks it’s rather funny that it’s the old models vs. the young ‘uns. Yeah, I know I can’t stop laughing.

 

At her hairdo 

In cometh Emilioth to get hith winner’th hugth. Lorena’s really really happy for him that he’s going to Bryant Park. I’m sure that has nothing to do with the fact that she’ll be going with him. She thinks being with him really gives her the upper hand since he won the last four competitions in a row.  She thinks he’s going to blow everyone like out of their socks. Is it really bad that I hope he chokes?

 

Like on a sock or something? 

Old Hambert comes back next to give Kristina a hug. She loves his designs. Mila’s next, and she gives Old Eyes a hug while keeping her eye on the rest of the girls.

 

Brittany! Don’t think I don’t see you making faces over there! 

Can I just say how fucked up I think it is that Monique has to sit through each designer coming back here while trying to be gracious about hers getting cut? I’d be hella pissed if I were her.

Mila tells Old Eyes she is her muse now. She’s going to go home and design a collection with her in mind.

 

I’m thinking………mothballs.

And here comes Jaysian so he and Brittany can squeal together about him possibly making it through to Bryant Park. While Jaysian is talking to the girls, Monique tells us that part of her is really happy for all of them.

 

Just not any part you can see right now. 

And who can blame her really? Honestly, I’m really hoping that one o the designers will grab her up because I think she’s gorgeous. And then Flamingay comes in to say his goodbyes. And to tell them all he’s not pregnant.

He and Monique joke that it’s because he made a human condom. Can I say again how much I love him? He has such a great attitude about all this, and I hope that he does really well and gets a lot of business after being on the show.

He tells Monique he’s so sad. Not for him, but for her. He says he did everything he could to make sure both she and Kristina stayed in the competition for as long as possible. Monique tells us she’s proud of herself that she didn’t cry which has a lot to do with his reaction as well.

And so the sweetest guy in the competition this season (and perhaps ever) leaves us once again.

Time for this week’s Klum Klatch!

Heidi must be troubled by bad daydreams or something because she is wearing a ginormous dreamcatcher around her neck.

 

You can never be too careful. 

She points out that there are only five of them left because you never know which models have learned how to count. She says when they started she had to move her head to be able to see them all. Thankfully now she can just focus on getting the words out without moving her head at the same time.

She wonders what they thought about the circus challenge. No one uses this opportunity to talk about their fear of clowns. Kristina says it was her favorite challenge. 

Heidi wants to know what Monique thought about her outfit. She says that they both knew the judges were either going to love it or hate it. The fabric wasn’t her favorite, but she tried to work it the best she could. 

Heidi reminds Old Eyes and Brittany that maybe only one of them will be walking in fashion week. Brittany says she’s going to Bryant Park. So is Old Eyes. But she’s going with Jaysian. Old Eyes is going with Mila.

 

“Nu uh.” “Uh huh.” “No way.” “Yes sir.” “She’s touching me!!!” 

 

“Don’t make me come over there!” 

Brittany says that Jaysian and Mila are a little bit rivals. Heidi wants to know if Old Eyes and Brittany feel the same way about each other. Oh yeah. Old Eyes points out that they are the oldest and youngest models in the competition, so “we’ll see.” She tells us she doesn’t really think it’s that big of a toss up. 

She thinks Mila is way more sophisticated and……..better.

 

She can also look both ways at the same time, so that’s an advantage. 

Heidi says they’ve all been through a lot so she’s arranged for a final dinner for them all together. 

 

I hope it’s all the tic tacs we can eat! 

And on that note, this week’s Klum Klatch is over.

Back at Anorexia Apartments, the girls are getting ready for their dinner out. Old Eyes wonders if her boobs are hanging out of her dress.

 

If you have to ask, they are. 

They head on over to Buddakan for dinner. Yum. As they’re leaving the apartment we hear Brittany say, “Ow! My dress is hurting me.” Well, she’s sure to be eating a lot tonight!

Old Eyes starts the conversation rolling, asking Brittany which was her favorite challenge. Why the one that she won of course! Well, the evening is starting out way to cordially for Lorena, so she decides to stick her giant nose right into Brittany and Old Eyes’ business.

 

See this huge beak? It wants to know what got into you during designer eliminations. Why are you so mean to Brittany? Why don’t you like Brittany? Something smells fishy! Oh, wait. It’s my sushi. 

 

I do not recall this meanness you speak of. BTW, are my boobs hanging out of this dress? 

 

Oh, you’re not getting my nose out of this that easily. You like said like she should like go home like. 

 

Like what? About my boobs…… 

 

I think you’re mean to my friend who is just sitting over there not saying anything at all. 

 

You all see this bitch is wacko, right? 

 

I’d totally jump in but my mom taught me not to talk with my mouth full. 

Old Eyes tells us she has better things in her life than to worry about this crap. She’s right. This whole thing is so grammar school. Honestly, if it’s that big of a deal to Brittany she should speak up and Lorena should mind her own fucking business.

To the girls she says that Mila means the world to her. Finally Brittany decides to speak and points out to Old Eyes that she kept saying stuff about Brittany being out. Old Eyes doesn’t really care to discuss, but the Schnoz says she thinks that this is probably the only time they’ll be able to talk about it.

Then Brittany says she super annoyed and ready to get up out of the table and leave. Old Eyes says the competition between them has nothing to do with them at this point. What???? She lost me there. 

After dinner, they head back to Anorexia Apartments where Brittany and the Schnoz decide to go out on the balcony and continue to talk about what happened at dinner. Old Eyes and Kristina are also talking about dinner. Kristina thinks Brittany’s reaction was very immature.

Brittany tells the Schnoz that every time she tries to talk, Old Eyes cuts her off, and it makes her mad. The Schnoz tells her if someone’s picking on you you have to do something about it.

 

Unless I’m there, then I’ll just talk for you. 

What the hell is on her finger?!?!?

Brittany says she’s very loud; if someone’s in her face yelling then she’s going to get loud. And then it’s going to be louder and louder and louder and before you know the whole restaurant’s going to be trying to grab their weapons because they don’t know what’s going on.

 

I want to know where the fuck she’s been eating that the people there would be grabbing weapons! 

The problem with Brittany here is that Old Eyes never even raised her voice. Has she baited Brittany during the eliminations? Yeah, a little, but in a very passive aggressive way; she doesn’t strike me as someone that gets all loud and in someone’s face.

Old Eyes is talking about how Brittany said that she said she wants her to go home. She’s like, Duuuuhhhh……Hello? I want to stay, I want my designer to stay, and I want my friend to stay.

DUH. 

Ugh. The Schnoz and Brittany are STILL talking about it. Let it go already!  

After a quick break, it’s time for the model eliminations. Heidi comes out in yet another animal print.

 

A camisole would have been better under this one  

Heidi goes through her usual spiel about it being a competition for them too, and then she picks the first button. Old Hambert gets to pick first and he is going with Kristina. She is so excited.

 

And she just can’t hide it! 

She says she hasn’t been in Bryant Park in so long, and it’s going to be great to be there. Mila’s next and she’s picking Old Eyes. Old Eyes is stoked that no one stole her from Mila. Yeah, because that was sure to happen. Next is Jaysian and of course he’s sticking with Brittany.

So it’s down to Emilioth. The thing with him is that there is actually a chance that he would switch his models so there’s some hope for Monique here. The Schnoz is well aware that he has a history of changing models, and she’s hoping he’s gotten over his promiscuous phase and is ready to settle down with her.

He tellth them he doeth not take model thelecthion lightly; for him, a model is fifty perthent of what he putth on the runway. He tellth Monique the time he worked with her wath a lovely ethperienth, but he believeth that the Schnoth and him have created an unthoppable combinathion. And tho, he pickth the Schnoth.

 

Smells good to me! 

And so, that means that Monique is owt. She tells the designers that she wishes them the best, and blows them kisses on the way owt.

Awwww. I really like her and hope she does well in her career. She seems like a really sweet girl.

Backstage she tells the other girls she’s not going to cry, and she tells us she thinks it’s great that she and Flamingay got to make it so far. The saddest part for her is getting so close to Bryant Park. But her heart is genuinely happy right now.

 

Bye Monique! We’ll miss you! 

The designers pop over for a little visit and some bubbly. Well, cider for the kiddies, bubbly for the adults. And then each of them say a little something about their model.

Mila really likes Old Eyes because she’s old mature. 

 

And she doesn’t get freaked out that I can look at her and hem a gown at the same time! 

Jaysian loves Brittany’s confidence; he gets goose bumps watching her walk down the runway.

 

Plus she said she’d choke me later! 

Old Hambert really appreciates Kristina’s attitude. She doesn’t bitch and moan, she just does it.

 

Those Croats don’t fuck around! 

Emilioth thayth that the reathon he chothe Schnoth ith becauthe she can tranthform herthelf to whatever you put her in.

 

Pluth the avoidth eth wordth when I’m around.

The designers head out, and before you know it, it’s time for the models to head on home until fashion week. Old Eyes and Kristina without much ado, but Brittany and the Schnoz hug and cry and promise to be besties forever and ever and ever. Or at least until they get to fifth grade.

 

WAH!!!!! 

And there you have it, Gasmi; the final four. What did you think? Were you bummed to see Monique go? Do think Schnoz should mind her own business?

Next week, we’ll find out whether Mila or Jaysian get to go to Bryant Park. Also, Emilioth feelth like no one ith hith competition, Kristina loves Old Hambert’s clothes, and Schnoz thinks Emilioth’th clothes are not really her style. I will love it if they crash and burn!!!!! See you there!

SWAK, PottyMouth