Aria awakens from a nightmare at Ezra’s apartment.
“I dreamt I was dating an immature, pretentious hipster and OHMIGOD AAAAAAA!”
Welcome to your hell, Aria. Actually, welcome to MY hell, because I still hate the whole “Azria” thing. The paper, Ezra points out, states that Maya found some stuff of Alison’s that may have connected Garrett to Alison’s murder, but Garrett found her first and then killed her, I guess. Ezra then points out that it’s the anniversary of their first statutory event in the bar and now he wants to recreate their first “date.” Then they make out and my eyes roll so far back in my head that I have to go to the emergency room to get them fixed.
I’m back. They had to helicopter me to a specialist in Minneapolis, but I got through it okay. I’m taking donations for my recovery — just write a check to the Busch foundation in my name and they’ll send me a case of Busch Light with your name on it. And Hanna’s trying on some chunky necklace at some boutique. Her mom is there as well and is whining about how she’s not having sex. And then Spencer and her mom show up. Who’s ready for some PLL Mommy Talk Time? You are, because you have to be. Unless you fast-forward. Ashley and Veronica gab about the digging and Ashley asks if Garrett actually did it. Veronica probably breaks some sort of ethical code by letting Ashley know that the “prosecution had petitioned to have the body exhumed” but by the time they got there, it was gone so the judge couldn’t make his ruling.
Spencer gets an incoming call from “unknown” — she says that it’s Toby and she’ll get back to him later. I guess The Tobot is living in the Hastings’s loft, which is good, because it’s full of the copper wire The Tobot needs to consume to sustain his internal clock. Spencer whispers about how creepy it was that someone was in her house while she was sleeping. Hanna needs to go because she has to go to Dr. Sullivan for a little appointment, but Spencer needn’t worry — Hanna won’t blab about the whole Alison’s-body-digging-up thing.
Except Hanna lied: She’s actually going to the National Capital Area Cake Show in Annandale, VA. Well, not really. She’s at the institution to visit Mona who, as you know, lamely turned out to be ‘A’ in season 2′s lame finale.
Emily’s at home, thinking of all the lesbian times she spent with bisexual Maya. She ties Maya’s scarf (I’m assuming) around a picture of the two of them in which Emily looks happy and Maya looks like a bisexual passive-aggressive bipolar bitch-whore.
“Um, do you have a cardboard box I can borrow? It feels weird just, you know, standing here. Not . . . Not holding anything.”
Pam tells Em that there was a reporter at the door who wants to talk to Em about Alison’s body and junk. Her mom says that Maya would have been proud of Emily for making a difference this summer. Really, Pam? Because I think that Maya would have been jealous of Emily for spending so much time with the poor people instead of with her and would have proceeded to get drunk/high and yell at Emily and make her feel extremely guilty for no rational reason whatsoever. I don’t know if we’re watching the same show, Pam, but geez — get with it. Pam says that time helps and Emily will stop hurting some day. Emily says she’s fine.
Hanna is trying to talk to Mona about fashion and then asks her if she’s just going to “look right through her,” but Mona just stares into space . . . Hanna tells Mona that she’s not here for Mona; she’s here for herself and wants to know what she did that made Mona hate her so much. Sad. Sadness. Single tear. Hanna leaves and runs into Wren who almost breaks Hanna’s cover (Hanna’s using an alias to visit Mona). Wren volunteers a couple times a week (of course) and Hanna tells him that she just needs some answers, but Mona’s not talking. But she IS listening.
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