Well this is it. This is what we have been waiting for. After months of waiting we are finally at the finale of Project Runway. ItÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s Fashion Week and our three remaining contestants are there to show off their own collections. Who will be crowned AmericaÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s Next
Top Model great designer and then fall back into obscurity with the possible exception of a one shot Bravo Special? Who will be the second cast member of BravoÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s Project Runway/Road Rules Challenge: The Gauntlet 3? Will it be Chloe, Daniel or Santino? I for one am rooting for my girl Chloe, simply because I want to see a one page spread in Elle Magazine of her model Grace so I can add it to the shrine in my bathroom. Oh yes, she will be mine. After all, itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s Fashion Week and anything can happen!
And yes I know this recap is as late as the last one, but what better time to post a recap for Project Runway than the day after the Oscars? Seriously, what was Charlize thinking!?! That bow looked like a gray chiffon tumor on her shoulder. Ugh, what can I say. IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢m just not a fan John GallianoÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s work. We start the show with Heidi greeting our final 3 on the runway. They will now face their biggest challenge. A twelve piece final collection for Olympus Fashion Week. They will each have 8 thousand dollars and a few months to work on their collection at home. But before we send them on their way, we need to eliminate a model. There are 4 beautiful models standing before her right now. But only 3 pictures in her hand. Oh, wait, different show. Well as usual Daniel stays with his model Rebecca and Eden, the model with the hideous arm tattoo, is sent home. Heidi then tells them to go back to their apartment at Gotham CityÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s Atlas New York where she and Tim will say goodbye. And Keep an eye out for Mr. Freeze. Word is he is planning on stealing a priceless collection of diamonds from GothamÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s Museum of Art to help finish his huge freeze ray that will engulf all of Gotham in ice.
Over at the Penthouse of the Atlas apartments, which still just looks like a roof with patio furniture to me, Tim tells them to look at New York and take it all in because they have a lot of work ahead of them. I suppose mentioning the fact that Daniel lives uptown would kind of be a buzzkill right now wouldnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t it? Anyways, They all have a toast of champagne, with Heidi of course just having Apple Cider, and they wish them all good luck.
Cut to 5 months later in Los Angeles where Tim Gunn is traveling to L.A. to check out Santino Rice and see how his work has progressed. But heÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s not just traveling; heÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s traveling in style in a red 2007 Saturn Sky Roadster! Tim knocks on the door and when Santino opens the door Tim exclaims Ã¢â‚¬Å“Santino! Can you believe this!Ã¢â‚¬? Ah yes, the mock surprise as they greet each other while both are conveniently miced up with camera crew in tow. The arm of Trump reaches everywhere.
Santino is currently renting a house in Hollywood working on his collection and when they go to take a look at it, I have to admit he seems to have done some good work. When Tim asks him what the theme is I actually donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t even have to hear the answer. ItÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s the same answer everyone has had for the last two seasons of the show. Ã¢â‚¬Å“40Ã¢â‚¬â„¢s Hollywood glamourÃ¢â‚¬?. Just once IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢d like someone to just say Ã¢â‚¬Å“IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢m going for a Civil War era prisoner look with some Bangladeshi influencesÃ¢â‚¬?. I mean Christ, mix it up a little. ThereÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s only so much Hollywood Glamour one man can take. Of course if it was me I would just look Tim straight in the ye and say Ã¢â‚¬Å“Tim my collection can be summed up in one word. Sweatpants.Ã¢â‚¬? Then Tim would get that concerned look on his face, but trust me. IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢d make it work.
SantinoÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s workroom can be described simply as filled with lots and lots of flare. And about 40 bedazzlers. Tim is blown away by Santino (no pun intended. OK, maybe a little). He sees a level of refinement that he hadnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t seen before. Santino tells us that he recently quit his job working for his friends label and has dedicated all his time to his upcoming collection.
From here Santino brings Tim to Venice Beach California, because that is where Santino spent a lot of time. We then get a brief Santino bio with childhood pictures of our favorite 7 foot tall smelly designer. And lo and behold, it looks as if Santino is biracial. His parents look just like the neighbors on the JeffersonÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s. So I guess that would make Santino Lenny Kravitz. Santino also tells us that he once designed a line which fell apart and left him homeless. Well gee, IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢m glad that that whole Ã¢â‚¬Å“clothes falling apartÃ¢â‚¬? thing is a part of his past.
Santino then tells us all how he is supersensitive and that he has major insecurities about how he looks and how his voice sounds. And no matter what you say about those things, heÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s thought the same thing about them ten times more deeply. Almost makes you feel sorry for him until you remember him talking about how he hated the sound of DianaÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s voice.
From here Santino takes Tim to his friend TonyÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s house. Tony, Santino tells us, is an Ã¢â‚¬Å“accomplished modelÃ¢â‚¬? As well as a photographer. I didnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t know High Times employed models. Tony is the one man who took in Santino and is one of his best friends. When Santino reveals that he made it to the final 3 Tony responds by yelling Ã¢â‚¬Å“Dude what the f*ck!Ã¢â‚¬? and high fiving him. Did I also mention the room had a bunch of children present? Yeah, well TonyÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s an accomplished model so sometimes they act like that.
From here its off to visit Daniel in New York City. sadly no 2007 Saturn Sky Roadster in sight. How will I know what to buy without my product placement? Although if Segway was a sponsor on the show this would be a perfect opportunity to stick Tim Gunn on one and have him tool around NY. Maybe its me but methinks I sense a bit of love in the air. Not only does Daniel get a big hug, but a kiss and Tim even rubs his shoulders a bit. I smell a spin off show. Odd Couple 2006!
Besides a few details here and there, Tim isnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t as enthusiastic about his choices as he was with Santino. And neither am I. HeÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s got these weird god awful prints and his jackets look like something the Golden Girls would wear. Tim tells him to push the risk factor. And from there Tim and Daniel go shopping! Yeah! Just an FYI dear reader, thereÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s nothing like the sight of me ironing my clothes for work while watching a television show of two gay men shopping for clothes. Welcome to my life. I switched over to Sportscenter and did a few push ups for about a half an hour to make sure my manhood was intact. And someone needs to tell Peter Gammons that his double-breasted suit was ill fitting and looked like something off the rack. And his tie color just did not work with his complexion. And umm, oh yeah. Go Sox!
Next itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s on to Houston Texas, where Tim is sporting the black 2007 Saturn Sky Roadster. HeÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s got one for each of his moods. Chloe answers the door with a big smile and introduces Tim to her mom, who looks to be wearing one of Daniels coats. Tim gets the tour and we see Chloe in a cheesy painting with her 7 sisters. Think Ã¢â‚¬Å“dogs playing pokerÃ¢â‚¬? cheesy. But still, Chloe has got a good looking family so when we see a picture of all of them together itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s a veritable cornucopia of cute Asian chicks. 8 Girls aged from 39 to 30. ChloeÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s mother has got one hell of a uterus.
Where’s the unicorn?
We then get ChloeÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s back story, which is much more interesting than SantinoÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s Ã¢â‚¬Å“Whoa is me I grew up in a small townÃ¢â‚¬? crap. Chloe and her family were forced to grow up in a prison camp in Laos before they were able to sneak out and emigrate to America. Yeah right whatever. Santino had to grow up in Missouri for godÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s sake!
When she shows Tim her collection so far she has a lot that isnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t even finished. Scratch that, she has a lot that she hasnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t even started. Tim is concerned. We get the hand on the hip/hand to the chin look. He asks to se her sketches and she says she doesnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t do sketches. WHAT? No sketches!! SheÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s developing Ã¢â‚¬Å“organicallyÃ¢â‚¬? she says. Good lord she hasnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t even draped yet! I think I just got a dose of the vapors! Tim then gives that concerned, Ã¢â‚¬Å“well, you have a lot of work cut out for youÃ¢â‚¬? look and leaves it at that. Then we get a quick family picture with Tim and all the cute sisters and heÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s off.
After the commercial break we are back in New York and ItÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s Fashion week. 5 days before Fashion week to be precise. Since Daniel lives uptown he is the first to arrive. While unpacking his stuff he whips out a bag and with his most cocky gay swagger voice looks at the camera says Ã¢â‚¬Å“DidnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t know I designed bags did you? Yeah well, I do.Ã¢â‚¬? Then he talks about how he wants to keep that secret hidden or else someone like Santino might steal his design. OK, a little advice Daniel, before you talk smack like that, make sure your bags donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t look like something I made in eighth grade woodshop along with my birdfeeder.
Soon to be sold on the QVC crafts show. Comes with a free Hummel
Next up itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s Chloe. SheÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s so excited she hasnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t slept in 2 days. But at least she assures us, here collection is done. When she gets to their new apartment, which is a huge penthouse apartment unlike their smaller loft from the show, she and Daniel hug and laugh. Which is a big difference from when Santino shows up. He just gets a simple hello. Apparently Chloe has said some thingÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s in interviews since the show came out that gives the impression that she doesnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t like him. Well, he did accuse her of being a glorified pattern maker. Actually, I don’t even think he said glorified.
When he sits down they all start talking about the show, since Fashion Week was actually only a few weeks ago, they have all gotten to see a good portion of the show along with the rest of us. Not only has Santino watched every episode, heÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s read Ã¢â‚¬Å“every shitty blogÃ¢â‚¬?. WhatÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s that!?! OHMIGOD! You mean Santino is reading this very recap? Hey Santino!! We were just kidding about the Ã¢â‚¬Å“you smell like fried onionsÃ¢â‚¬? part! WeÃ¢â‚¬â„¢re still total besties right? Oh well. If not donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t worry. I heard Jonny Fairplay doesnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t like me either. Oh wait. He said he read the shitty blogs. Never mind. False alarm.
Apparently Santino is feeling the heat for shooting his mouth off on the show. HeÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s trying to apologize to Chloe for his comments but ultimately Daniel and ChloeÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s take is that he made his bed and he will lie in it. Daniel however seems to take this a little too seriously. Ã¢â‚¬Å“I think its been quite a sobering experience for Santino. Whether itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s short term or long term or if this will affect him for the rest of his life I guess weÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ll all have to wait and see. Ã¢â‚¬Å“ Whoa their Daniel. ItÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s just a reality show. LetÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s not get carried away. Being edited as the bad guy on a basic cable reality show isnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t exactly the life changing experience you seem to think it is. And lets all remember whoÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s the one thinking his wood carved bags are the next rage. So you got your own issues you need to deal with first.
The next day they all go down to the new studio space and take out their collections and hang them up, all of them making sure not to stare at the others. ItÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s a psyche out game doncha know. They then cut immediately to Santino saying ChloeÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s looks like a big couch. So much for the whole Ã¢â‚¬Å“life changing experienceÃ¢â‚¬? part. Tim then shows up and tells them all to gather round. He then reminds them, in case they forgot, that they are here at Olympus Fashion week and they will be showing their collections in front of a thousand people. Also, the 2007 Saturn Sky Roadster rides like a freakin dream.
Tim asks to see everyoneÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s collections to see where they are at. We start with Santino. Tim loves it. ItÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s beautiful and Ã¢â‚¬Å“incredibly impressiveÃ¢â‚¬?. Then onto ChloeÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s. He likes it, albeit not as much as SantinoÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s. Finally itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s cocky Daniels turn. First we get a clip of Daniel saying he loves his collection and he thinks itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s Ã¢â‚¬Å“f*cking hotÃ¢â‚¬?. Time for a reality check. From the moment he starts showing Tim his stuff, Tim is silent. He just stares at it, saying nothing. Even IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢m uncomfortable and IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢m just watching it. At one point while heÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s looking at his double-breasted cashmere coat, Tim actually winces. Then he shows Tim his fantastic bags that are poised to sweep the country. Ã¢â‚¬Å“It looks like something youÃ¢â‚¬â„¢re dad made in the garage. It looks like woodshop. It bothers me.Ã¢â‚¬? Oh SNAP! When Daniel voices concern at the silent treatment he is receiving Tim just says heÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s waiting to see how it looks on the girls. But itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s too late. Daniel is offended.
Wince number one
Next up is my favorite part. ItÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s time to pick out new models for the collection. Michael Kors one piece of advice, other than Ã¢â‚¬?you can never use too much bronzerÃ¢â‚¬?, is Ã¢â‚¬Å“DonÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t settleÃ¢â‚¬?. Make sure you have the perfect model he urges them. From here its rapid fire model shopping. Making them walk, taking pictures. Close-ups of asses in jeans. ItÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s a veritable TVGasm. Chloe says she needs girls with chests. Finally a place where someone can say that and not get stared at like some sexist meathead. Of course once we start to hear what they are looking for in a model itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s the same vague nonsensical terms they might have well just said they were looking for Ã¢â‚¬Å“1940Ã¢â‚¬â„¢s Hollywood glamourÃ¢â‚¬?.
I love fashion
The next morning its time for the first fitting. While they are milling about their models Heather, Rebecca and Grace show up. Awww. Tearful reunion. Heather runs over and gives Santino a hug, Rebecca gives Daniel a kiss, and Grace kneels down to hug Chloe. The girls all start trying on their outfits and Tim stops by, as he is wont to do. When he goes over to finally look at Daniels pieces now that they are on the models, Daniel says he is now convinced that he will see the brilliance of his design. Yeah, not so much. In fact we get more silence from Tim as he circles Rebecca who is wearing what I can only describe as the costume for X-men arch villain Juggernuat. The thing has a brown leather breastplate for gods sake. Tim then worriedly asks to see another outfit on the model. When they are looking at that Tim tells him that the seam is showing and the hem isnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t even on the bottom.
Wince number two
From here its on to the Tre-Semme hair salon where we get more vague notions of what each designer is looking for. Yet another variation on Ã¢â‚¬Å“40Ã¢â‚¬â„¢s Hollywood glamourÃ¢â‚¬?. We hear things like, Ã¢â‚¬Å“young sophisticationÃ¢â‚¬?.
Back at the studio Daniel admits that heÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s nervous about finishing everything. Things like pant legs, hems on sleeves. A lot of his stuff is still Ã¢â‚¬Å“raw edgedÃ¢â‚¬? he tells us. The man had 4 months to finish, and he still has seams showing. We then see him poking holes in belts for crying out loud. As they are working the new models Chloe picked out started showing up for fittings. Then Daniels models start filtering in. But SantinoÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s models are nowhere to be found and he goes home without any fittings done.
The next day as they are all scrambling to get their work finished Tim and Heidi show up and are about to drop the final bomb of the season. And itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s a good one. They have to come up with one more final look and it will be shown on their final runway show. That hits them all like a ton of bricks. Not only are they designed out, but all 3 still have tons of work to do. Chloe starts crying on the spot. And in order for them to complete the work they are getting an extra set of hands. They then bring in the 13 eliminated contestants to their amazement. Did they even watch last season? Heidi then picks names out of a bag a each designer gets to pick one person to help them. Daniel picks Nick, Santino picks Andrae, and Chloe picks Dirty Diana. Sweet. IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ve been missing the double D.
How much rejection can one man take!?
Once they start to work its clear that while Chloe and Daniel are trying to pull something together, Santino is lost. He is just a blank slate. Soon they are taken to Mood and given 250 bucks and an hour to shop. Daniel, Nick, Chloe and Diana are diving in but Santino is still lost. He canÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t even decide on what fabric to get. “Even if you put pasties and a freaking maxi pad on the thirteenth model and send her down the runway its like who gives a f*ck at this pointÃ¢â‚¬? Santino says. See, we may think he looks smelly but we can all agree he’s pretty funny.
With that cliffhanger in the air the show comes to an end. Next week is the grand finale when we see the show at Fashion Week and they crown the winner. Can’t wait.