Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Recap: You’ve Got a Married Man In Your Eye

49 Comments

1. 1
   Classy Drunk
   Posted January 8, 2013 at 7:40 am

   Honestly Brandi, can you wear a bra so Bravo doesn’t have to waste time pixilating your erect boobies. Sheesh.

   Faye is awful. I am all for saying what’s on your mind when it comes to you and your business. Once you start interjecting other people then you are just messy.

   Ick. David Foster is a pig. I admit I love to cook and take care of the house but I don’t want it to be something that you think I’m supposed to do to take care of my husband.

   What about Ad’s skin would make me want to buy her skin care line? It looks like the rubber from the bottom of a construction boot.

2. 2
   emilt714
   Posted January 8, 2013 at 8:18 am

   I’d like to take a baseball bat to Faye’s face if I didn’t think it’d make her look better… she is GOD AWFUL. I’ve seen some horrid housewives in my day but she is by far and away the effing WORSE… And I love that Brandi didn’t give in to that evil hag.. GO GURL.

   ps- Kyle, Cher called, she wants her jumpsuit back.

3. 3
   featherhead
   Posted January 8, 2013 at 8:31 am

   Why is YoYo wearing a down vest in her house to cook dinner (in CA?) is it that freaking cold in there? And her perching her ass on the island to eat with her family – gross! I never knew that girls that play volleyball and wear jersey’s are lebsiana’s?

   I had a horse growing up and I have to say he was deprived. I didn’t get a massuse or acupucture, or aromatherpy (he did that on his own) for him…..

4. 4
   Classy Drunk
   Posted January 8, 2013 at 10:06 am

   Since Taylor was going to divorce Russ anyway she should have already been willing to give up the ring. I am sure she was planning to use it for other things but a ring and two bags to sell a 1.5 million dollar lawsuit isn’t that bad of a deal.

   I’m pretty sure Fail doesn’t wear the ring anymore. Go and get a replica made if you really need something pretty and shiny to look at.

5. 5
   labowner
   Posted January 8, 2013 at 10:16 am

   Classy didn’t it come out that those H bags were fake?

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   labowner
   Posted January 8, 2013 at 10:17 am

   By the way – what happened to the Miami recaps?

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   Classy Drunk
   Posted January 8, 2013 at 10:27 am

   @lab, Miami reunion is up now and I think it was Teresa’s Hermes we were saying was fake…or was that her LV? I can’t remember.

8. 8
   Wills
   Posted January 8, 2013 at 11:07 am

   If Brandi and Cam-Gram were such great friends why didn’t Camille stand up for Brandi against morally corrupt Faye?

   And I do have to give props to Bravo for the great editing/transition from RHOBH to Vanderpump Rules…not that I watched it but…

9. 9
   lalaluvr
   Posted January 8, 2013 at 11:13 am

   Flip this is one of your best recaps ever!!! Luvs all the quotes and pics.

   Holy hell was that physic a fruit roll up or what???? I never laughed so hard, esp that part at the end about Princess Di. HAHAHAHA

   Aid, even more of a superbeotch. Fake, plastic, morphing face re: Death Becomes Her should be the name of her new skin disfiguring line. Kyle is even a bigger, free sheot getter, horrible sister/human being than I ever thought. Low blow on the Kim stuff, gawd I truly hate her.

   I have to admit I’m a little disappointed at Lisa and Brandi for agreeing to exploit the bullsheot with *S* girl/homewrecking/husband stealing/hobag/Britnney. In Brandi’s case I’ll cut her a little slack considering she needs a paycheck Hell, who I am kidding? Bring on VP Rules LOL

   Luvs

10. 10
    featherhead
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 11:55 am

    Brandi’s “Chick’s with Dick’s ” description of the MC Faye Resnick was awesome. I don’t care, I love that girl!!

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    brzysmom12
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 12:22 pm

    One question – instead of a wedding ring and 2 shermes bags, why not the frickin huge mansion she’s supposedly living in with just her little tiny girl? Now without a ring and two bags, I’m sure there will be way more room/space than what they really need to live anyway.

12. 12
    labowner
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 12:30 pm

    Bryz why would the bank pay off Taylor’s debts?

13. 13
    Lisa
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 12:37 pm

    I totally agree with Wills, the segue from Housewives to VR’s was brilliant on Bravo’s part. It gave that show the 0% chance it had of me watching it to the 100% it got, only because I kept hoping it would head back to Housewivesland.

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    Dutchiedevil
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 1:30 pm

    I tried wiki-ing YoYo and although there is not a lot of info about her on the Dutch section, I think I get why she is like she is. She was brought up in a part of our bible belt. Not a very good excuse for being a homophobe, but it is an explanation. That goes for being a “hausfrau” too and a tight a r s e too. I am glad her dd does not share her sentiments!

    Still bummed I cannot watch the show, but love, love, love to read your comments.

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    Kimar
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 1:54 pm

    So basically, what I got from the Vanderpump Rules pilot is that it’s Jersey Shore, set in Beverly Hills.

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    labowner
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 3:23 pm

    Dutchie not even on the torrent sites?

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    kthxbai
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 3:42 pm

    @Flipit you said on WWC that Lisa was being Brandi’s mentor. But I think it’s more that the 2 of them are the only 1s that have had a scrap of home training. So they got to be friends from having that in common.

    There’s just some things that go beyond if you say fuck at the table. Or if every stitch of your clothes came from the walmart. That you either get taught at a young age or don’t. Whether you learn it in a trailer park or a palace or a palm leaf hut.

    Speaking of table manners I got to “Russellier” and came this close to spitting food. Thanks for making me ROFL so hard. I really needed to.

    Specially after getting so mad at Morally Corrupt Faye Resnick that I wanted to go take a soapy washrag to her face. And pull the filter off of her hair light. So she’d show up looking even worse than she does.

    “These are horrible, horrible people”

    They need to put a sign that says that every time Fake German Accent Ho-landa and her crusty old trick come up on the screen.

    Somebody needs to call child svcs and get those kids sent to a good home.

    Does anybody know if Ad’s skin care line will fix a rip in a vinyl car seat?

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    kthxbai
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 3:44 pm

    Sorry about that. I put myself back on html tag moratorium time out.

19. 19
    aliens.rock
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 4:41 pm

    ugh…I though that maybe I was the only person duped into watching Vanderpump Rules, or whatever this crap was.:-) Weird, how Bravo usually crams 30 minutes of ads into a show, but they transitioned from one (shitty) show to another (shitter) without a slightest bump… The show is ridiculous. Really, waiters from other restaurants WANT TO BE LIKE THEM? What a bunch of douches. And here is a newsflash for you: People don’t want to be like you. They want you to get them their food fast, and exchange knives if they have fingerprints or dried bits of food on them!!! Nothing against waiting staff – I have done it too. I didn’t think anybody wanted to be me, and I wanted to be the person being served food, not a half slave with a shitty pay!
    Failor – I was physically sick watching her patethic attempts to gain our sympathy. You asshole: you got out of paying 1,2 million dollars by handing over a wedding ring from a man you were divorcing and who was allegedly abusing you, this and two effing purses??? And you want me to be sorry for you??? Some people are forced into bunkrupcy because they or their children got very sick, and they had to pay their bills. Some people lost their jobs. This bitch didn’t deserve an ounce of sympathy, at least not mine. And her attempts to be “funny” during clairvoyant’s visit (opening eyes, making faces). No matter what she did, she looked stupid for even inviting this scam artist to her house.

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    ChaCha
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 4:55 pm

    Flipit, thank you for calling Faye Resnik out. She’s been as ugly on the inside as she is on the outside for over 20 years. Back to reading….

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    labowner
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 4:57 pm

    Classy – actually they both have fake bags, but Teresa wasn’t trying to pay someone off with hers. Taylor’s were fake Birkins.

    I’m not much of a jewelry fan, but how can a ring be worth $250K?

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    atlgirl
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 5:26 pm

    I laughed so hard at CAN YOU DANCE???!!

    I’m sick of David Foster’s sexist pig-self. Yolanda seems to be on her own show at the moment. When is she going to interact with the rest of the women? And let the poor girl play volleyball if she wants, geez.

    I think Faye assumed that Brandi was getting the villain edit this season, and if she confronted her, she would look like the hero, like the last time she did Kyle’s dirty work at Camille’s dinner party in season 1. She really read the situation completely wrong.

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    ChaCha
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 6:03 pm

    “I knew she was dating the married father of three, but I didn’t think she’d be dumb enough to actually bring him on the show.” I would put anything stupid past Fail, but her MARRIED boyfriend is dumber than Fail for coming on the show.

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    ChaCha
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 6:04 pm

    I meant “wouldn’t” put anything stupid past Fail.

25. 25
    Robin
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 6:33 pm

    How trashy are these people that they want to settle the lawsuit with rings and things? I know that they probably knew that weren’t ever going to get cash from Failor. It’s just unseemly that someone sat down and wrote a shopping list of things of things they could gather from Failors house. Handbags, rings, rope, canned corn, gift certificate for future dog euthanasia…

    On the other hand she chose to go in buisiness with them and trash is as trash can.

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    P
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 7:38 pm

    Flipit- as always- fab recap. Morally Corrupt Faye and her awful mauve/silk prom like decorated dining room are fighting for screen time and they both lose. As for Vyle, someone wrote Cher called and wanted her jumpsuit back- worse fashion sense. I love that Fail has the balls to bring her married/attorney/lover to the dinner and it is OK for him to GOSSIP about Kim heard she was seen at the Havanna Club and that is fine!?! Implying that because Kim has been ignoring Vyle she must be drinking. Vyle is such a shitty sister. My theory on Fail and married/attorney/lover. Fail knows where the stolen $ she and Russell scammed out of their friends is buried. She confided in attorney, slept with him and they’ll be rich and live happily ever after. Once a grifter always a grifter, Shana Ford Armstrong.

27. 27
    Robin
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 8:16 pm

    @P

    When the little prick attention whore cheater started off by saying that he “heard” that Kim was there I don’t know why, but I expected SOMEBODY to say either this,

    Did you see her yourself? OR

    “She isn’t here and isn’t a topic for conversation, she is my sister and she has been through enough because of folks like you that like to gossip about things they know nothing about. Keep my sisters name out of your mouth or I will remove you from this ugly dining room.”

28. 28
    smarlo
    Posted January 8, 2013 at 8:40 pm

    Chick with a dick made me SNORT!

    also, love Brandi’s blurred nips….

29. 29
    Dutchiedevil
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 1:57 am

    @Labowner, I am a bit of a torrentophobe… I need my computer for my business and if I have illegal stuff on there I cannot interact with the systems of my clients….

    Did I say people where Yo grew up are tight a r s e d? It is so bad, on a wind free sunday all you can hear is their backsides whistle when they walk to church. (Driving on a sunday is a BIG no no)

30. 30
    Tmurda
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 2:01 am

    Maybe i’m crazy here, but I’m thinkin that if i’d like to throw dinner or nice, peaceful gathering with no drama, maybe I WOULDN’T FUCKING INVITE PEOPLE WHO ARE CURRENTLY HATING EACH OTHER! Just a thought.
    And btw- while watching this ep the other night, 2yr old stepdaughter went to the tv screen, pointed at Faye’s nose area and said “it’s a witch! for trick or treat….like a witch!”. I gave her a popscicle and gave her a new Hello Kitty poster i’d been saving to give her when she did something awesome.

31. 31
    kthxbai
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 2:14 am

    @Dutchiedevil http://www.hidefolders.org is a freeware that you can use to fix it where other people can’t get to or even see the directories with your private information.

    It’s good if other people ever have to see or get connected to a computer you use for work. That might also be the same 1 you use for personal stuff. Like if you ever buy anything online or pay any bills. Or have photos of your relatives or whatever.

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    Classy Drunk
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 4:43 am

    @tmurda, the dinner was already in place before the drama started, and everyone was all you know why Ad’s not here.

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    Smarlo
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 5:28 am

    Was Yolo-anda sitting on the counter eating with her feet in the sink? My kid pointed it out.

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    mere2142
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 7:34 am

    Remind me never eat anything at YoYo’s house. Why does that woman insist on putting her ass all over countertops wherever she goes? It drives me insane!!

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    Gypsy
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 7:57 am

    Flipit is right, I hope B gets some of that book money fronted to her, that wig she has is horrendous, poor thing! And did she get bigger implants? Me thinks so. I kinda liked the confrontation. I thought it was a clever way to passively aggressively address:

    That she goes to therapy with Eddie & LeAnn
    That Eddie & LeAnn might be divorcing
    That the people who lied to Brandi got outed on Bravo
    That she got to say her side of the story for once and not be totally gag orderd

    Re: The bags. I remember Tre with the fake LV’s and Sheree with the fake Birkins in every color of the rainbow. Gurl only has 250K. She doesn’t have Bikrin money.

    @ Lab a really nice 10c ring can easily go for close to a milly or more depending on the 4c’s and all that. I did think it was tacky but if they were friends before I am sure the couple knew the only thing of value was that ring. What I question is, who are these people that they can’t tell a real Hermes from a fake and live in Beverly Hills? For shame!

    Looks like I am going to have to sit Gypsy BF down tonight and have a talk. I had no idea I have been a Lesbian since High School since I was the Captain of the Volleyball team!

    Seroiusly why is this Aryan nation family on our screens? I cannot, CANNOT stand Yoli. She adds no value she is a total hate monger and anyone who puts their feet in the kitchen sink needs a therapist.

    @Flipit, they did the 10 minute sneak peek for next week last night if you’re looking for redub material. Boy how did I miss how junked out Kim’s teeth are. Snooki, help a girl out with some veneer money will ya?

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    shantigal
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 8:04 am

    Great recap Flipit! So much good shit in this episode, but my favorite moment had to be Vyle’s HATE FACE when Marissa wasn’t buying her shit about Brandi. She looked like she just queefed out that horrendous centerpiece that the MCFR bought at Hobby Lobby.

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    labowner
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 9:00 am

    Thanks everyone. Dutchie sorry – hope the file Kthxbai sent will help.

    Gypsy you got me thinking about YoYo’s place in this franchise. Do you think Lisa brought her on to eventually take her place as the very rich sophisticated one as she slides over to Vanderpump Rules?

38. 38
    dizzygirl
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 9:17 am

    Did anyone catch when the did Ad as the talking head after her scene w. Fred Flinstone about the skin care line say…Brandi has cause a lot of problems in my marriage…something to that effect? It can’t be the surrogacy thing..it’s not like Paul didn’t KNOW she wasn’t pregnant…or wait..maybe he didn’t? No, that would be crazy , she faked 2 pregnancies to her husband? That would be insane. ok..back to reading..

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    Gypsy
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 11:58 am

    @lab…possible since I have no earthly clue why Lu Lu Lemon is on the show. Maybe to replace the Pump…as the richest housewive or the typecast foreigner…dunno. Maybe they’ll give her a terrible edit and we’ll watch her perfectly drawn marriage get crumpled up and thrown in the trash.

    That would certainly make for good TV. Maybe that racist is incubating….

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    Mimo
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 12:14 pm

    Anyone remember when Kim went over to Yo’s house right before their retreat? Hadn’t Yolanda’s son just gotten a buzz cut? How much time is one season supposed to cover?

41. 41
    labowner
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 12:26 pm

    Mimo I didn’t understand as they were talking about their kids going back to school. The Ojai trip was in May.

42. 42
    dizzygirl
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 12:37 pm

    ynnfam.com/2012/12/31/blind-item-clue-to-adrienne-maloofs-secret-real-housewives-of-atlanta-episode-recap/

    The open marriage? That’s the secret? That would be personal….that would be defaming…well not in LA but maybe the rest of the world..lol…they reference what Brandi said at the last reunion by there only being 2 husbands present…Ken and Maurico and Paul and Ad having a fake marriage….hmmm…that makes more sense than a surrogate…surrogate story had to be planted…I need to know what the secret is!!!

43. 43
    dizzygirl
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 12:38 pm

    The above link also breaks down the Bravo filming timeline too

44. 44
    NotAlway'sPerfekt
    Posted January 10, 2013 at 9:37 am

    aliens.rock@19, Well stated and ITA!!! Can’t stand that lying grifting grifter Taylor Armstrong, fka Taylor Ford, fka Shana Hughes, fka…???

45. 45
    Lola Says
    Posted January 10, 2013 at 7:41 pm

    Dep thoughts this werk’s show birthed:

    1. Brandi is one crafty bitch – making a handbag out of a beanbag and all (when she’s shopping with the pump)
    2. I had no idea octomom moonlights as a medium
    3. “Chick with a dick” muwhaha! Brandi for the extra point!
    4. Yolanda “helllllo my lahhhve” I would listen to this crazy bird ramble all day if I got to use that kitchen for one day
    5. The episode didn’t have nearly enough twitching for my liking

46. 46
    thisbuggs4u
    Posted January 12, 2013 at 6:42 pm

    @Dizzy, one of the USWeekly’s that came out around Christmas time stated that Brandi did reveal that the secret was that a surrogate was used…Yes it is US Weekly, and it was from an unnamed source…

    Loved the “chick with a dick” comment…Faye needs to shut her effing mouth…She must have taught Kyle her shit stirring ways…Kind of funny how Faye knew all the secrets at the table, but Marisa didn’t know anything.

    I say good for Brandi to walk away from the dinner table! But I would have told Faye to either fuck of, or to go fuck herself and then left the table that is just me. I really did feel for Brandi when she had that sit down with Schenna, or whatever the eff her name is. Schenna is a stupid girl…I mean, how do you not know “who” he was…and that he “wasn’t” married…Didn’t Eddie meet Horseface Leanne when they were making that stupid lifetime movie? You know you have made it when you are making lifetime movies!!

    Oh, but I think the Oscar, Teen Choice, Golden Globe goes to Failor this episode! I have never seen anyone convulse when they are trying to squeeze out a tear!

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    thisbuggs4u
    Posted January 14, 2013 at 12:37 pm

    Looks like the Maloofs might be loosing the Kings to Seattle!! HAHHAHAH!

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    labowner
    Posted January 14, 2013 at 12:42 pm

    Thisbuggs I wouldn’t hold my breath. They backed out of the deal with the City of Sacramento last summer at the very last moment. No one likes to deal with the Maloofs. Not upstanding at all. I wonder if all they are left with is 3% ownership like the Palms will she still be upset they are not getting free marketing?

49. 49
    thisbuggs4u
    Posted January 14, 2013 at 12:54 pm

    There is some Rich dude in Seattle that has already bought space in the SoDo district of Seattle. Now all he wants in an NBA team…The Kings are the likely choice because of all the shit the Maloofs want but won’t put any of their money into…I mean I get that Sacramento really wants them to stay as did Seattle when the Sonics were sold to Oklahoma City…Sonic Owners didn’t wan to put up the money to fix the Key Arena…but I digress. I went to 1 Sonics Game the whole time they were here. Granted it was a Free ticket through work–used to work at Starbucks–

    When Adriann went to Sacramento last season, you could tell that the Maloofs were not really welcome there…