AL: It’s the shittiest cookie ever.
CB: Well, what does it taste like?
AL: It tastes like nothing. It’s a feel good cookie.
CB: Like communion?
AL: No. Communion, otherwise known as the body of Christ, is not a cookie.
Huh. So, anyway, I still really want to try a pizzelle. Maybe with some ice cream. Oh, maybe that’s why Kat’s setting up shop in the parking lot of a gelato shop.
Kat sort of dips her toe in the bakery cookbook pond, but Ter quickly shuts her down with the information that no one would buy a cookbook just about baking. So she’ll just keep adding little sections on the end of her books, and if Kat tries to get in the way of that – well, all the better makings of a new bloodfeud. Actually, now that I think about it, Kat needs to get her ass to a publisher ASAP. For the good of the show.
And finally it’s time for Kat to debut her homemade cannolis in a gas station parking lot. Or wherever. There’s a tent. What more do you need to know? And of course, the topic of conversation is Teresa. Will she show. Is she jealous. What’s Milania up to. Well, actually that last one was just me.
Lebanese Dilbert tries to make Kat mad while she makes her frozen cannolis. It doesn’t seem like it’s working at first but then she’s suddenly all riled up and yelling about consciences. Lady, this is reality TV. Nobody gives a shit about consciences.
The party starts, and there’s Rosie directing trays of dessert “under ‘da tent”. Don’t forget, she’s got that gelato shop experience from back in ’92. Old neighborhood and all.
All the usual suspects are there in their usual form. Caro is pretending like she’s she’s miserable to be there, but secretly looking for trouble. “Let’s just keep to ourselves,” she says to Jacquee. And of course because Lauren’s there and food is there too, let’s not pass up the opportunity to catch up on those issues.
She makes a big deal about whether or not to eat a tiny brownie bite, but ultimately – and try not to be too shocked at this turn of events – ends up eating it. Immediately followed by the lament that she feels like every time she eats something, someone is watching her.
So just gorge in private. Are you committing to this eating disorder or what?
The Gorgas show up and it’s another opportunity for Caro to get a comment in about how Mel and Kat both are working hard to realize their dreams, and she can’t imagine how anyone would have a problem with that. Cue Teresa.
Ter strolls in with her trashy looking friend Linda. And she’s got things to say, mainly about Kat’s claim that the fabulicious cookies are her mother’s recipe. I think this Linda is the friend who she says she likes because she always agrees with her. Anyway, from their first appearance at the party, the crowd is wild with curiosity. Who is that with Teresa, they whisper. It’s up to Caro to identity the species as “Linda”. “Ah, Linda,” goes the chorus.
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