Real Housewives of Atlanta: Kim-tervention: Female Trouble

Dearest Gasmii!!!

The new season of the Bravo reality soap that puts the “ho” in “down-home” has barely begun and already we’ve had laughter, tears, extreme opinionated women of color, and some shocking accusations of racism. And that’s just in the Comments section of this very blog! Yes, mijos, a certain Gasmi who calls herself Digitaldiva thinks your humble recap artist is no better than a kard-karrying KKK member! I won’t dignify her libelous assertions by repeating them here– you can go back to last week’s entry to read them for yourself.

At first, I was devastated. As a proud puertorriquena, I have endured my share of bigotry based on my flawless golden-brown complexion and habit of bursting into excited Spanish during emotional moments. And as an unrepentant trash-TV fan who believes, like all good Gasmii, that our fave tele-genre is best enjoyed with an ultra-un-PC sense of humor, I have been put down by those who think their love of Brothers and Sisters, Mad Men and Maya Angelou makes them superior to those of us who worship Oz, NYC Prep and Mandingo.

Then I realized what’s actually going on here. “Digitaldiva” is none other than Real Housewives of Atlanta Season One star DeShawn Snow, dangerously unhinged with bitterness at being fired from the show. She looked up a few fancy words like “colloquialisms” (misused in her comment by the way), flicked on the spell-check, and set out to destroy me, Bravo, TVGasm and you, loyal readers, with her hateful venom. But it’s no use. I’ve got your number, lady. And I don’t go down without a fight. Just ask my last boyfriend.

Sheree meets Tania for lunch at Rosa Mexicano. Fans will remember this as the spot where Kim famously grossed-out over the guacamole, the existence of which our fave talentless songstress found both confusing and repellent, similar to Dallas Austin‘s reaction to Kim when he showed up for the shortest lunch in history with her. Sheree immediately orders guacamole then starts regaling her pal with the story of how her meeting with Independence Party planner Anthony led to a nasty bitch-brawl. Brave Sheree tells us she wasn’t ever “scared” of Anthony (like “the average person” would have been), even though he could barely restrain himself from wringing her independent little neck.

You have to understand… I was promised a helicopter.

Anthony, who recently issued a statement asserting his heterosexuality, certainly came across as an insanely over-reactive nutbag in their spat, but knowing Sheree’s habit of abusing her employees than blaming them when her overblown fantasies fail to materialize (anyone else remember the abortion known as She by Sheree???!) I tend to think the editors cut out a shitload of Sheree-on-Anthony mistreatment. Still utterly irony-free, just the way we like her, Sheree sadly tells Tania that the party as originally envisioned is off. She had SO wanted to celebrate her independence surrounded by hundreds of her closest friends, but now that she’s going have to throw the bash herself, she’ll have to settle for inviting a few girlfriends over to whine about how they’ve been screwed over by men.

Sheree hopes that all the adversity she’s had to conquer can be an inspiration to oppressed women everywhere. She’s certainly taught me that a lack of empathy and talent is no reason to act like anything less than the most important woman in the universe. She interviews that everyone she knows has been telling her how great she looks, so she must be doing something very right. Because, to quote the great Fernando Lamas, “It is better to look good than to feel good.” Mazel tov! Cut to:

Super-wife Lisa makes coffee and enjoys some family time with hunky hubby Ed and fiendishly clever moppet EJ (the kid can read at 18 months and probably even knows the meaning of the term “colloquialisms”). Lisa interviews that last year she was worried about Ed returning to the NFL. Despite the fat paycheck, the travel and safety issues involved made Lisa breathe a sigh of relief when Ed ended up NOT playing for Oakland. But now free agent Ed is again considering signing with a team. Lisa asks EJ what he thinks of daddy playing football and the tot head-butts mommy in the clavicle.

I don’t know about you, Gasmii, but I could get pregnant just LOOKING at that.

Lisa says she herself is planning to “work smarter, not harder” with regard to her Woo Girls jewelry line and real estate moguling. It seems like she’s telling Ed she’d rather scale down their life than have him pig-piling it up with a bunch of violent brutes, and she adds that if he does join a team, it may get in the way of them having a second baby. I agree that having Adorable Ed gone all the time, paralyzed or suffering from painkiller-induced sexual dysfunction is no way to roll. Unless a football storyline would somehow result in footage of Ed strutting around the locker room in a jockstrap. In that case, Lisa needs to let her man follow his bliss. Cut to:

This top needs to be THIS much lower cut.

NeNe wants to repair her drama-ridden friendship with Kim. Her busty blonde ex-BFF, Sheree, NeNe and Lisa should “all come together and say who said what and why was it said”. In other words, recreate last season’s dishy Reunion show by putting Kim on the hot-seat and grilling the piss out of her. Sounds like a plan! NeNe dials Kim, who’s friendly but a bit reserved. NeNe says she wants the foursome to meet up, to which Kim replies “For what?” To sit down and hash things out. “I guess,” Kim says, knowing damn well she has no other choice if she wants to get any decent screen time this season. She tells NeNe she’d prefer it be just the two of them, which NeNe is okay with for starters. They make a date for drinks at their “usual place”, Cinco’s. Which is also the combined number of breasts between them.

Fashion Gay Dean Pardue arrives Chez Kim with some dresses for her to look at. Dean is going to design a dress for Kim. She explains that she wants to be “classy-sexy but leave a little bit to the imagination”. Hear that, Gay? No exposed beavers! Kim reminds Dean that she’s single and wants him to fix her up. Does he know anyone? As a matter of fact, yes. Dean coos over a carpetbag purse that Nancy Gonzalez sent over for Kim to consider buying. Kim thinks what with being sugar-daddy-free at the moment, maybe she shouldn’t be dropping $3500 on a handbag. Or $3K on a Dolce and Gabbana belt. Even her assistant thinks it’s “stupid” to spend that much. But Kim, who has a framed nudie art-shot of herself on a nearby wall, just can’t resist overpriced accessories. “I’ll shovel shit for D&G!” she gleefully interviews. I’m sure it won’t come to that– the usual sexual favors should be more than enough.

Kim tells us she has no problem providing for herself. I agree: with that weave and those tits, she’ll never starve.

Normally you’d have to go to the AVN Awards to see a dress like this.

Kim shows Dean detailed drawings of the dress she wants him to make in nine days. No problem, he drawls. And how’s Lisa? A real “class act” that hasn’t changed a bit. NeNe? They’re getting together for the first time since their “problem”. FLASHBACK to NeNe telling Kim that Kim should have come to her if Kim had a problem: “How small of you!” Dean says that despite being a “hot mess” who’s “gonna say things”, NeNe loves Kim and her daughters. Kim agrees that NeNe “has my back”. Kim thinks it’s much more important for NeNe and Kim to work things out than it is for Kim to settle things with Lisa and Sheree, who are of course much more likely to beat the living shit out of Kim.

Oh, Miss Kim… can I be you for Halloween?

Dean interviews that Kim likes to dress “a little bit different” than the typical Atlantan then shows Kim what he brought for her to try on. Kim interviews that Dean calls her the “show-stopper” and that she’s his own personal Barbie doll, which would make perfect sense if Barbie had a pooch and an omnipresent cigarette and said things like “This is not the boob I like. I like THIS boob!” Kim calls in her assistant Myleik to watch the fashion parade and dutifully oooooh over the sight of Kim’s titanic tits squeezed into various porn queen creations. What the hell else does she have to do? Kim doesn’t need an assistant, she needs a boob-wrangler. Cut to:

Exactly.

Kandi on the phone with her publicist, irritatedly perusing “these damn blogs” on her MacBook. Kandi’s mother isn’t thrilled that Kandi’s marrying AJ, a man with six kids. And Kandi’s sure reading gossip about the couple is only making mama madder. Kandi refutes some web-basher labeling AJ “a deadbeat”. The publicist tells her to fight it by putting out “positive press”. “Make your haters your motivators!” she advises. I couldn’t agree more. My own haters have motivated me to be sassier than ever, Gasmii. The flack finishes up by telling Kandi “Stay off those damn blogs!”

Who the hell is “Digitaldiva”?

Kandi says the upside of being in show biz is getting to do what you love, while the down is constant scrutiny. AJ enters and concurs that Kandi should stay off the internet. She admits she’s especially “irked” by the accusation that she paid for her own gi-normous engagement ring. AJ wants to know what’s for breakfast. “Fish and grits?” Kandi shrugs, hissing at her laptop.

Which Housewife would you least want to see coming at you with a loaded gun? Caroline Manzo, of course. OK, which ATLANTA Housewife? Bingo!

Congratz, Tania. You’re now an accessory.

Sheree interviews that her new tract mansion is so isolated she wants to feel safe and that she can protect her family. Turns out Tania is a Desert Storm veteran who’s handled plenty of guns, but it’s doubtful her Army weapons instructor ever told her to “love on it” when demonstrating the proper way to shoot a handgun. Which is just what Tania tells Sheree as T demonstrates the proper grip on a big-ass gat. “Don’t you feel sexy?” Tania giggles, as Sheree completely agrees, flipping her extensions around as she brandishes the gun. In leather pants, spike heels and bright yellow earmuffs, Sheree resembles a James Bond villainess. She pretends to be all nervous and delicate as she steps up to the target, then shrieks at the recoil. But of course she came very close to hitting a bulls-eye on the first shot . Sheree interviews that she felt “good, powerful and in-control… it was a rush!” Sheree giddily brags that she hit the “kidney, stomach and lungs” of her imaginary assailant.

Sheree’s ex-husband and Anthony and Kim and that lazy seamstress who ruined She by Sheree better watch. Their. Asses. Cut to:

Kim meets NeNe at Cinco’s. They immediately order margaritas and NeNe gets right down to business. NeNe says if they can’t be real friends, she doesn’t want to be friends at all. Kim agrees. So now it’s time for NeNe to recap the lowlights of their stormy, kooky pal-ship. Why did Kim dump NeNe completely and take up with Sheree? Because NeNe sang that horrible drunken song about Kim, Kim replies. NeNe dismisses this and wants to know why Kim didn’t come to her so they could have settled the song shit and moved on? Uh, well, obviously Kim wanted to meet NeNe tonight because her friendship is important to K. What’s up with Sheree and Kim? Kim says they’re “cool” and that Sheree texted her a couple of times from Niecy Nash‘s b-day bash last week. About that… why did Kim ignore NeNe that night? Kim says she didn’t stay because she saw NeNe with Lisa.

Is it just me, or does this salsa taste a little jizzy?

Realizing they’re not getting anywhere, NeNe says the four of them need to “get together and talk”. Why? Kim quickly snaps. NeNe tells her Sheree mentioned that Kim’s been talking trash about Gregg (Mr NeNe, who Kim supposedly said was broke!) Kim invites Sheree to sit “her fat ass” down right here and say that to Kim’s face cuz it’s totally a lie! NeNe remains calm, almost sullen, in fact. She reiterates that it’s best for all four current Season One ‘Wives to get together and discuss and thinks Kim would want to hear what’s being said about her. Kim demands to know what that is, NeNe won’t tell her, Kim says “this is stupid” and that she doesn’t care anyway. Another meeting– “dinner, drinks, whatever”– including Lisa & Sheree just isn’t important to Kim. The only important one to Kim is NeNe. NeNe makes a mildly skeptical face as Kim goes on, conceding that she’ll sit down with NeNe & Sheree, but not Lisa.

“She said some really derogatory things,” Kim declares, interviewing that Lisa accused Kim of not really being sick and thus not having a valid medical reason to justify Kim’s addiction to slutty blonde wigs. We see the Reunion flashback where tearful Kim recounts the not-so-tragic tale of the doctors being “90% sure it was cancer” followed by Lisa branding Kimmy “a habitual liar”.

WAHHHH! Boozy num-nums all gone!!!

“So Lisa don’t come,” NeNe says, ending negotiations. Now does Kim promise to come? Oh, yes, Kim does, all sweet and perky. Won’t NeNe eat something now? Yes, she will. But first another pink margarita, to which Kim adds a treat-shot of Patron Silver. NeNe predicts the boozing will result in her “makin’ looooove” with Gregg later tonight, and then tacks on another forecast: Kim will be back with Big Poppa by Friday. “Okay, bitch!” Kim cheerfully rejoins. NeNe interviews that of course she had a good time with Kim at this tequila-soaked rapprochement, and then we see just how good when Kim tipsily crawls onto NeNe’s lap for a more intimate chat.

Lez be friends!

Kim: You never had a nose-job? NeNe: No, that was Sheree. “I miss you,” Kim pouts. They start laughing like a couple of horny sloshed drunks and NeNe can’t resist pawing Kim’s chest. “Don’t touch my fake titties!” Kim scolds, then interviews that despite her bond with NeNe, Kim’s worried about adding Sheree to the mix next time. She should be. Girlfriend’s a helluva shot! They pinky-swear that they’ll be completely honest with each other. (“I’m ready for this pinky shit!” squawks NeNe.) Cut to:

NeNe giving Gregg a blow-by-blow (a recap, not fellatio, you pervs!) at their new river-rock tract mansion. NeNe interviews that Kim reportedly spread gossip about Gregg being broke, and Blondie better come clean at the Sheree meeting and “apologize if she needs to, and then we can go on”. Gregg tells NeNe she can let it go as far as he’s concerned. NeNe says she herself has no trouble apologizing if she’s said something wrong. Gregg dryly wonders what that might sound like. “Oh, please,” NeNe scoffs. Cut to:

“No, seriously… you’ve been under that dryer way too long.”

Kandi with her hairstylist Paula talking about her upcoming solo album. Kandi interviews that she’s been going to Paula for seven years and always gets good gossip along with professional hair-care. Kandi shows off her ring at the salon and interviews that her engagement is so recent (six months) that she hasn’t had a chance to talk to her mother in person about it. Kandi is getting new color and a do before visiting her mom. Paula assures Kandi her mom is just being protective of her baby girl and will come around about AJ. Cut to:

So nice to meet you, sir. Please disrobe and have a seat on my desk.

Lisa & Ed meeting OB/GYN Dr Tressa Scineaux at her office. Lisa wants Ed in on the conversation about conceiving “over the age of 35″. Dr Tressa outlines possible risks: Down syndrome, fibroids, endometriosis, and pelvic adhesions. All this scary talk freaks Lisa out, especially when the doc tells them her own recent pregnancy at 38 came with 4-5 months of extreme nausea and nonstop vomiting. But the baby’s fine. Ed interviews that he’s sure they won’t have any problems. I’d feel a lot more secure if Ed would provide a fresh semen sample. Live, on-camera. Ed says he’s had a talk with his “soldiers” and they’re ready to go for it. In fact, he tells Tressa, maybe they should try for “three or four”. Lisa: Are you serious?! Cut to:

Kandi drives to her mom’s suburban house, feeling anxiety about their upcoming chat. Several members of her family are there having lunch, including Uncle Ralph and Aunt Nora, who’s been feeding Kandi reports about her mom Joyce‘s dissatisfaction with her upcoming marriage, or as Joyce sees it, “the end of the world”. Joyce looks none too happy to be a supporting player on TRHOA and doesn’t even look up at Kandi when asked what the problem is. Joyce replies that Kandi could do better RE: her man but Kandi’s made her mind up. Which Kandi definitely has.

Kandi interviews that her mom has a history of meddling in her love life. Joyce finally meets Kandi’s eyes to deliver this grim pronouncement: “You don’t realize it’s serious dealing with one baby-mama. Can you imagine what it’s like– four baby mamas?” Drama drama drama! Kandi’s tight-lipped smile indicates that she’s not all that fussed about these hypothetical complications. Joyce goes on to remind Kandi that AJ has “a set of three girls” (please let them be snarky, sullen triplets) whom Kandi doesn’t know at all. Then she plays the dreaded grandma card– “I’m thinkin’ about MY grandchild.”

“I don’t care how dreamy he is. I am NOT buying six more Christmas presents every year. And birthdays? Forget it, honey.”

This gets to Kandi, who starts tearing up while trying to stay strong. She tells her mother she’s happy and wishes Joyce could just be happy for her– can’t they agree to disagree? Joyce deadpans that she’s never been surer of anything than she is that this marriage is a mistake. Aunt Nora jumps in to chide Joyce for thinking the worst. Kandi says her mother shouldn’t borrow trouble and that her relationship with AJ has brought a lot of good to Kandi and her six-year-old daughter Riley. Kandi is openly weeping by now and this scene is weirdly upsetting. For once, we feel like we’re spying on a private family moment and not some over-the-top diva wacko-ness. Joyce winds things up with this passive-aggressive nugget: “You don’t have to worry about pleasing me. You please yourself.”

Kandi says that AJ may be rather fertile, but he supports all of his kids and plays a big part in their lives. To Kandi, that makes him a desirable catch. Nora tells Joyce, who looks like she’s smelling a cat box, that Joyce raised a good daughter in Kandi and it’s time to trust her. Aunt Bertha agrees and then lists the family members who are on Kandi’s side. For the record, they include herself, Uncle Ralph, Uncle Beebo, Uncle Booley, and Aunt Hazel. Kandi interviews that she appreciates all their support, but that she’s afraid her mother is secretly hoping the marriage tanks. I wonder how many lavish gifts, including cars and suburban homes, Kandi has showered on her mom over the years. I also wonder if Joyce has been on the money about some of Kandi’s previous men. I’m sure all will be revealed. Unless Kandi realizes having a camera crew follow your every waking moment for months might not be the best thing for any relationship. Cut to:

Random One-Minute Scene du Jour: NeNe and Lisa go to dinner at Sia‘s restaurant. Lisa says she wants to order something called “cake-bread” that Kim introduced her to. The ladies decide Kim suffers from multiple personality disorder and that her alters are “Kimberly” and “Kina“. Lisa: Kina? Which one is she? NeNe: She black. Cut to:

Does the restaurant have a metal detector?… No reason, just curious.

Sheree gets a call from NeNe, who expresses shock that Sheree is actually doing laundry. She does seem to be folding actual items, but I bet she has no idea when to add the fabric softener. NeNe tells Sheree she met with Kim, who agreed to cocktails with Sheree & NeNe this Thursday. Sheree interviews that NeNe has known Kim a lot longer, and according to NeNe “Kim has always been a liar”. Sheree agrees that they should put everything “on the table” so they can sift through all the naughty, nasty things Kim has said about everyone on the show. Cut to:

Ed prepares a romantic dinner for Lisa. All by himself, no chef, no caterer, no wait-staff. He explains that they’re having spring salad and Chilean sea bass. The dining table is encircled by a rose-petal heart. What a fucking dreamboat. It looks like tonight’s the night for them to start working on Baby #2 and let’s all take a minute to pray that we get to see a little of that. Lisa arrives at the tract mansion and is blown away by Ed’s thoughtful deliciousness. Ed’s white shirt fits beautifully over his muscle-slabbed pecs as he serves her salad, featuring glazed almonds, pecans and a red-wine vinaigrette.

He just brought winking back.

Lisa tells him he didn’t need to go to all this trouble in order to “get lucky”. No shit, honey. You’re the lucky one in this scenario and don’t you forget it! Ed says he’s willing to try for twins every single day, then feeds her plump, ripe strawberries. Ed walks Lisa away from the table (I guess we missed the fish course) with a sweet pat on the ass and sets her up on a massage table in a candle-lit room. He loses the shirt and enters in a snug white wife-beater and drawstring pants, giving us a nice view of his choco-licious booty as he fills a huge, candle-ringed sunken tub. This has gone beyond mere romance and to become the hottest lady-porn since the Sex & The City film. He uses his muscular arms to apply massage oil, then whispers that this date is going to end with them in the tub.

Then he cuts a loud fart.

I bet his gas smells like a pine forest.

Lisa find this cute, and so would you, if it was followed by a full-body rubdown and a hot bubble-bath with this cuddly superstud. Unfortunately, as soon as Ed sinks into the suds with her and they start cooing “Let’s make babies”, CUT… However, this much Ed so early in the season is a promising start, so I’m still holding out hope for that jockstrap.

“You know what’d make this song even better? A cake made of deep-fried Milky Ways.”

The next morning Kandi goes to the recording student to meet with big-time music man Jazze Pha, a rotund R&B record producer who’s worked with everyone from A (Aaliyah) to W (Wayne, Li’l). Jazze asks what she’s feeling RE: her solo album. She says the songwriting has been all about telling stories and that she’d like to include more love songs. She asks him to play some new music for her, to see if it sparks anything. A handy keyboardist obliges her with a funky slow groove, to which she sings “They say he ain’t cute/and he got all them kids”. I have a feeling when she told AJ he was a creative inspiration to her, these aren’t quite the lyrics he had in mind. But this is how Kandi deals with her issues and it’s way more mature than skull-frying one’s party planner or leaving one’s frenemies off one’s doorman’s list. Kandi and Jazze prepare to lay down the track, which might be called Good, Good and sounded pretty damn– well, that. Cut to:

Fab Restaurant. That’s the name of it. It may or may not be fab. I hope for its sake that it is, so any patrons sitting near NeNe, Sheree and Kim will be enjoying their food too much to flee in terror when the shoes come off and the f-bombs and blonde weaves start flying. NeNe interviews that the goal today is for her and Sheree to confront Kim about all the trash she’s been talkin’ and find out why she’s been saying such things. Neens, I can save you the price of three bottles of wine: Kim’s an ignorant slut.

Ammonia, meet bleached.

Kim arrives last and slides into the booth beside NeNe. Sheree is in a chair next to NeNe’s left breast. Kim interviews that seeing her two ex-BFF’s made her ask herself “What am I doing here?!” She says that she came “against her intuition” for NeNe’s sake. The gals start off with wine AND champagne. And a margarita for NeNe. Jesus! Kim breaks the ice by asking Sheree about her upcoming divorce party, giving S the chance to tell her fave new story Saint Sheree VS Anthony The DL Freak-Out Queen. NeNe’s thoughts on Anthony: “Where the hell HE came from?!” And Kim sucks up by adding: “Don’t cancel your plans cuz of this loser. Don’t let him piss in your Wheaties!” Nice brunch-talk, babe.

Kim then tells them she brought a helmet, “in case you guys wanted to like poke your heels in me”. She whips out a bike helmet and models it for NeNe and Sheree, who enjoy a nice laugh while making mental notes to go for Kim’s eyeballs when the fur starts to fly. “Come on, bitches, let’s talk!” Kim says. NeNe interviews that she thinks Kim is trying to disarm them by acting all sweet and self-deprecating, then comes right out and tells Kim that this is an “intervention”.

Who knew Dior made protective tard-wear?

Back from commercial. NeNe says she and Sheree want to get everything out so they can all move forward… IF they can move forward. First up– what Kim said about Mr NeNe. What’d I say about Gregg? Kim replies. Sheree helps jog her memory. Kim referred to Gregg as “broke-ass”. Kim quickly says she never said anything bad about Gregg. After a quick coughing fit (possibly from mixing three kinds of booze before dinner), NeNe tells Kim calling Gregg broke IS bad. Sheree joins in by accusing Kim of telling NeNe that Sheree put stuff on the internet about NeNe’s home. Kim says Sheree’s the one who told Kim that NeNe only rented her house (SCAN-dal!). Sheree denies it. Kim starts to lose her shit, calling Sheree a liar. NeNe says there’s no way Sheree would even know NeNe’s “personal business”.

As other diners and the Fab staff start to notice the shrieking coming from their table, Kim swears to God “on my fuckin kids” that she’s telling the truth. Kim slaps the table and says she hopes God strikes her kids dead because Sheree’s a fuckin liar. Kim obviously needs a refresher course from her psychic about the whole swearing-on-one’s-kids thing. But NeNe’s more concerned about what Kim said about Gregg and, oh yeah, Kim told NeNe that Sheree bounced a check for shoes at Neiman-Marcus.

“You’s a muthafuckin liar!” Sheree squawks at Kim, who’s by now standing up. “I hope God strikes both my kids dead tonight if I said what you’re tellin me I said,” Kim replies.

It WILL be much easier to find a new Big Poppa when she’s kid-less…

Sheree demands to know what Kim actually said then. All Kim can come up with is that maybe she said NeNe had no class. NeNe says she really does want to settle things today. Kim tells NeNe that she misses her, but can’t deal with Sheree making up lies about her. She calls Sheree an “opportunist” and reminds NeNe that Kim stood up for NeNe and left with her when Sheree barred NeNe from her other divorce party last season. Kim starts to walk out (to the relief of the looky-loo Fab manager and waiters), but NeNe grabs Kim’s arm. She says Kim really does like Sheree. Kim: I don’t now, dude. (LOL) Sheree calls Kim “trailer trash”. Kim tells Sheree to go fuck herself. Then Kim leaves.

Kina, is that you?

NeNe interviews that Kim was “pretty convincing– maybe Sheree made up all this stuff.” NeNe doesn’t know who to believe! Sheree: I’m gonna go kick her ass. Over NeNe’s protests, she grabs her purse and follows Kim out, as we all mentally flashback to Sheree and her newfound handgun skills. NeNe wobbles after Sheree, impeded by liquor and high heels. They approach Kim on the sidewalk and all we hear are “Get the fuck up outta my face”, “fuckin liar” and “Bitch!” before we see the dreaded words… TO BE CONTINUED…!

Next week: Kim calls Sheree a whore, Sheree tries to give Kim a beat-down, a lot of semi-nude male models, and Dwight grabs Kandi’s tits.

C U Next Thursday, Gasmii!