Ter just repeats that she asked her family not to speak about it. “So it’s okay to get paid for it but we’re not allowed to talk about it,” snipes one of the chickens. Well, yes. It’s no one else’s info to share.
Then Mel chimes in to say that she asked everyone not to talk about her being a stripper or golddigger on camera, but Ter didn’t listen to that so why should she? “Who cares?” bellows Smurfy.
Next thing you know, Jacquee is querying Smurf about if Chris told him he met Jacquee as a stripper. “He met you in Vegas. I think he was married, or engaged,” Smurfy mutters. “My husband met me at a trade show in Chicago! At a national event!” Jacquee shrieks uselessly, cause come on, we all know “trade show” is hooker territory. Be it “national” (whatever that means) or held in a barn – it’s where you go to don a nametag, stand awkwardly around a buffet and wait for a hooker to come say hi.
“I hope you go to jail!” yells Jacquee. Um, that’s kind of terrible.
So let’s introduce the RHNOJ husbands! Chris, Midge and Lebanese Dilbert join Brown Smurf on the stage. Al Manzo is working. Most likely in the apartment above the Brownstone. Andy jumps right in and excitedly points out that this is the first time Midge and Ter have seen one another in a year, since the Posche fashion show.
Then we’re reminded that the husbands were a big part of the story this year. Here’s the action packed recap: Midge feels the need to “whip it out” all the time and Mel doesn’t know why. The Brown Smurf loaned Midge some tools once that Midge never returned.
There’s a fight in the basement. Lebanese Dilbert gives Brown Smurf a black eye. Smurfy insults Midge. Midge walks out on Kat’s pool party. Oh, I guess that’s it. Wow, that IS a big part of the story.
Andy has a lot of question for the guys. First of all, have the Joes always been contentious? Because sometimes they seem to get along. Midge says that they grew up together. He considered Brown Smurf a cousin and then he married his sister. “I loved him,” Midge says and maybe I’m just buying a cheap performance but – well, I’m buying it. I can see Midge sort of following Brown Smurf around, looking up to him.
“But then he flipped the switch and started hating me. I don’t know why,” Midge concludes. Wait, I thought we decided this was about tools? Did we not decide that? Andy has the same concern. “Did the feud start over tools?” he inquires.
In response, Midge points out that he has succeeded in life, Smurfy yells that no one cares followed by the statement that it makes him sick to be there looking at him. Which sort of indicates he does care, but you know, logic and the Guidi just don’t mix.
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