And when Ter went over to their table to congratulate them at THE CHRISTENING, which started the fight in the first place – why didn’t they just say “thank you”? Why was it all about “Why are you here?” and “Walk away like you always do.”?
Because, my friends, the Gorgas come on the RHONJ on the condition that they would start shit with Ter. Bravo knew there was already bad blood, and the Gorgas casting was contingent on keeping that blood boiling. And they came right out of the gate doing it.
Now that’s just fine and wonderful and great reality TV and all that…but spare me the speech about how you just wanted to be closer to your sister. By choosing to do the one thing that would make her absolutely insane – jumping on her bandwagon that was already halfway down the road.
Now it’s Chris’s turn to share his thoughts on the Gorgas, and he says that in his conversations with Midge about Ter, he always says nice things. “Just like you and Dina,” comments Ter. Oh, I love how she just goes for it with the Dina thing.
Yeah, just like you and Dina.
Midge tells us that he does love his sister and if she needs him, he is there for her in a snap. And he is sure she feels the same way too. So what happened? “Your wife, that’s what happened,” snaps Ter.
“No, the way you treat his wife,” Mel shoots back. And we are back in the yelling game. Mel says Midge wants Ter to respect her, and Ter accuses her over having “big balls” with Midge standing behind her.
For Andy’s part, he’s back to his favorite topic and that’s the Brown Smurf’s possible jail time. This had to have been trending on Twitter, which seems to be Andy’s primary resource for decision making. He asks Midge if Brown Smurf goes to jail, will you support Ter?
This inspires more yelling between Ter and Mel, while Midge yells for Ter to talk to him. I will just be completely honest here and tell you that I have no fucking idea what happened next. It’s just a lot of screaming back and forth with the Gorgas.
I do catch up at the end though, when Brown Smurf is asking Midge how he met his wife (bikini dancing!), Midge calls Smurf a bum, and Smurf yells at Midge to “pay his bills!” which given the fact that the entire season revolved around the Guidice bankruptcy is possibly the funniest thing said all night.
Oh, and now Jacquee’s in on it! Gonna take a break for that important picking-at-your-split-ends project to infuse your brilliant insight? Let’s hear it. “He has multiple personalities!” she yells, followed by the accusation that Smurf is telling people that she and Chris met in Vegas while she was a stripper, and hello, it was a trade show while she was a hooker! Why can’t anyone get it right?
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