Tyler Does The Running Man

Real World

By B-Side | Monday, August 7, 2006 | 9:15 am | 33 Comments

tyler02080606 Thank God for marathons. Without them, we’d have never encountered this week’s petty Tyler incident on The Real World: Key West. Yes, the prissiest bitch on reality TV dared to take on the West Palm Beach marathon — a full twenty-six miles of grit, pain, and social exclusion. What was that? Exclusion? Turns out that Tyler only invited half the house to watch his Chariots of Fire moment, and just as he was surely hoping, this resulted in the outcasts fighting, shouting, and seething with rage. But who cares, really? As long as Tyler remains the center of activity, it doesn’t matter how many people’s feelings get hurt. Low-life bitches.This week’s episode started off with Tyler getting ready for a marathon, and guess what? He was so proud of himself for doing this! Shocker, right? “It’s probably one of the most arduous athletic endeavors for an athlete to partake,” he said, adding, “If only Amanda Beard were here to see me in all my glory.”

Unfortunately, even though the marathon was a huge task, Tyler had been somewhat of a delinquent with the training. He told us that he hadn’t been able to really get out and run a lot because of all the hurricanes. Perhaps he should write a nasty note to Wilma: “You should have stayed in the Caribbean, you low-life bitch hurricane!”

We then saw Tyler running on the beach, his ass perilously close to falling out of his bathing suit. As he dazzled all the local beach-goers with his speedy waddle, he then told us that most people train a year for a marathon, but he was just throwing himself into it instead. Because he’s just that good!

Later, Tyler’s friend Scottie told him on the phone that his voice sounded abnormal. Tyler said he was nervous because he hasn’t been training hard, but not to fear: he’d already commenced an extensive burn book about his larynx. Ultimately, Scottie reminded Tyler of one very important thing: “Don’t go out too fast!” Apparently Tyler had been too speedy during the Boston Marathon, and as a result, he was absolutely dead by the end. Hey Tyler, you should have slowed down your pace, YOU LOW-LIFE, WANNABE FAST BITCH!

Just when we thought we couldn’t possibly get any more marathon pontificating, Tyler then told us that doctors don’t let people run more than two a year because it’s so bad for the human body. However, Tyler then noted that the sense of accomplishment during and after is “beyond compare.” Yes, it can only be trumped by the sheer rush that comes from creating a masterpiece like RED GOD!!! By the way, there’s something that’s bothered me about Tyler all season long, and I’ve had trouble pinpointing it. I think I finally know what it is though: he always speaks to us like he’s applying for college. It seems like he’s always trumpeting the importance of experience in a really showy way — the joy of visiting an Olympic stadium, the sense of accomplishment that comes from a marathon. Hey Tyler. Tufts is over. You can stop now.

Meanwhile, as Tyler patted himself on the back for a job soon-to-be well done, Janelle rode with Jose in a car and told us, “I think Jose is such a nice, friendly guy.” Wait, I thought she hated him? Am I crazy? Anyway, Janelle went on to say, “I just wish that he would step out of the shadow and be his own person.” Amen sister. We’ve been waiting all season. Every now and then, Jose seems like he’s going to step up and make an impression, but next thing you know, he’s sitting quietly by a stoop, waiting for someone to pick him up at the gym.

Anyway, Jose told Janelle that he’s just a private sort of guy, and compared to everyone else being so outgoing, he tends to look clammed up. Still, Janelle reiterated that she wanted him to “step out.” You know, that way she and Tyler could harp on him more. They really haven’t been able to gang up on him to the fullest extent. And that makes them failures.

Later, as a few people hung out in the kitchen, Zach told Tyler how excited he was to see the marathon. Yes, it was going to be a fun time for all the roomies. Well, not all the roomies. Tyler suddenly turned to John and said, “So John, I don’t want to be offensive to you, Svetlana, or um–”

And without needing him to finish his thought, John replied, “But you don’t want me to come to the marathon. I wasn’t gonna go anyways, dude. It’s cool.” Of course, by the tone of his voice, we could tell that John totally wanted to go to the marathon, which meant that this was soon gonna turn into a commotion. Sure enough, Tyler then explained that he was just gonna go with Jose because he had said that he wanted to go. Oh, and Paula and Zach too because they’d also expressed interest. But as for the rest, smell ya later!

“Zach, myself, Paula, and Jose going to West Palm Beach for the marathon — they could share in this experience, and they wouldn’t try to steal the attention for one reason or another,” Tyler told us condescendingly. Translation: the spotlight will stay on MEEEEE!!! AND ONLY MEEE!!!!

Anyway, John was pretty annoyed at this point, mostly because there had been all this planning, and yet this was the first he’d heard of it. Clearly he didn’t realize that HE was supposed to fawn over Tyler if he wanted to be included. Well, if you thought John was pissy, it was nothing compared to Janelle (of course), and let me say, she had every right to be pissed. She was allegedly Tyler’s best friend in the house, and yet he didn’t want her there? I’m sure she probably never vocalized wanting to go to the marathon because she just assumed that he’d know that already. And yes, I am taking Janelle’s side on something (truth be told, she’s been better the past few weeks).

Well, Janelle was livid — saying the idea of going to the marathon was never even proposed to her. “I’m not going to invite myself where I wasn’t previously invited to,” she said, employing some dubious grammar. Jose tried to smooth things over by saying, “He didn’t invite me. He just said he was going to be running the marathon–”

“Exactly. So you knew!” Janelle interrupted, her point being that she couldn’t have expressed interest if she didn’t even know about the marathon.

Tyler then tried to justify everything again by saying, “This isn’t invite only.” Uh, actually it is. Otherwise, it wouldn’t be an issue if uninvited people came along. Maybe the proper wording would be “Invite encouraged.”

Well, all this drama was getting to be too much for poor Tyler. “This is exactly what I didn’t want to deal with,” he said, adding, “Why must people always be so upset when I treat them obnoxiously? Ugh. I’m so much more mature. I’m really gaining a lot from this experience.”

Anyway, Janelle then replied, “From my perspective, the way it looks, it’s… this is invite only.” Now why would you say that, Janelle? Because you weren’t invited? Psssht.

Tyler then responded, “I’m sorry I didn’t invite you, but–” AHA! So it was invite-only after al! But excuse me, I interrupted. As you were saying, Tyler.

“I’m sorry I didn’t invite you, but we’ve had a very busy couple of days,” he said. And yes, that is the fresh stink of bullshit coming from your television. Luckily, Janelle was not about to take any of it.

“And it takes so much time to talk to one of your closest friends,” she retorted sarcastically. She then revealed that she really wanted to support one of her closest friends in the house. Too bad bitch. Not your decision.

“This isn’t about you, and this isn’t about anyone’s feelings. This is about me trying to run a twenty-six mile marathon,” Tyler barked back. So basically, even though she’s hurt and all, the only person that matters here is quite literally Tyler. I’d also like to add that having Janelle at the marathon taking up about two feet of a 137,280 foot course would be really, really distracting.

Anyway, when Tyler said that this was about him trying to run the marathon, Janelle was not happy. “Hey, I know this is about you,” she said bitingly.

“You know what?” he snipped back. “I am inconsiderate, and your bitch ass is too!” It’s what we’ve been saying all season…

Talk to the hand…

Tyler then accused Janelle of acting like a victim, which was funny considering it was he who was acting like he might be the casualty of too many adoring fans cheering him on. The two went at it for a little while, happily using the phrase “Don’t go there with me” in many different ways until finally, Janelle put her hand out and said, “Don’t worry about it. Stop there. And leave the subject alone.” Of course, she didn’t leave the subject alone. Instead, she went into another room and seethed, “Tyler is dunzo in my book. Dunzo.” Nice use of Laguna speech, Janelle! Hey, with this and the cool way she handled her ex last week and the friendly way she tried to make Svet and Tyler friends the week before that, I think I might be warming up to the girl. Yay Janelle!

But then again, I can’t act like I don’t snicker every time she says something silly. For example, she told us, “Do whatever you want to do, and I’m not gonna sit and judge your decisions, but expect a response.” Yes, she basically just said, “I won’t judge you, but I’ll judge you.” Either way, I think I understood what she was saying — every action has a reaction — and of course Tyler’s reaction to that was probably “You should have kept your action/reaction thinking in physics, you low-life philosophical BITCH!”

After the break, it was time for Tyler and his exclusive clan of marathon supporters to head off to West Palm beach, but first, he decided to write a letter to Janelle and John about the whole situation. (Note that Svetlana got nothing). We didn’t get to read the letter, but I imagine it probably started “Dear Bitches. Today is about ME! Respect!” Okay, maybe he didn’t say that, but Tyler told us that he apologized for the way everything had turned out, but he was not sorry that he didn’t invite them. You know, because he’s a dick. And yes, we were watching a college graduate and not a seventh grader.

Anyway, the group drove off to West Palm Beach, and Paula chimed in with her enthusiasm over the event. She said she was simply excited to say, “Go Tyler! You can do this!” And of course, she would follow that up with, “KISS MY ASS, MARATHON! KISS MY GODDAMN ASS!!!”

As the gang drove down the highway, Paula then pondered when she’d get to do a marathon. Tyler scoffed and told her to gain twenty pounds, to which she replied in her baby voice, “Nuh uh. They’ve got real skinny people doing it!” She then realized that a marathon involved running and not starving and immediately retracted her statement.

Ultimately, Tyler informed everyone, “Do not do what I’m about to do.” He then added, “Seriously. Don’t steal my glory. Only I can run marathons. Me. Me. Me.” Okay, he didn’t actually say that, but I’m sure he was dying to. Later at dinner, Jose put on his High School Student Reporter voice and asked Ty-Ty where he got the motivation to do things in life. Tyler of course leapt at this chance to talk about himself and said, “I’m miserable and depressed unless I’m like being proactive in my life, accomplishing something. I have to be achieving or else I won’t be happy with myself.” Seriously, if he hasn’t completed a burn book in two months’ time, he enters a deep, unforgiving depression. And by the way, nothing says “achievement” like sitting around a house for five months on TV.

Well, this may have been Tyler’s moment to shine, but it was Jose who stole the spotlight. The lovable ragamuffin suddenly opened up about his past, saying how he always viewed himself as the underdog — his mom had him at seventeen, he was a welfare baby, and he grew up in the slums. This caused Paula to emit a small, empathetic “Damn…” Tyler, on the other hand, was silent. Either he was appreciating this meaningful experience for future use in a speech about how he appreciates meaningful experiences, or he was quietly seething. This was his trip, dammit! Jose’s been quiet all season long, and now he decides to open up and have the more moving childhood story on Tyler’s big weekend??? Screw you, Jose! You should have stayed in Key West, you low-life welfare baby bitch!

“I can’t believe that no one’s paying attention to me right now.”

Anyway, Jose then told his roommates that his alcoholic dad wouldn’t help him get a car, telling his son, “Who do you think you are? You’re nothing! You’re going to be a piece of shit just like me!” Wow. Poor Jose. You’d never think he had come from that background. Maybe he’ll snap and kill everyone someday. Either way, his issues clearly trump everyone else’s now. Take THAT, Tyler and your “My daddy wanted me to play hockey, but I wanted to swim instead” sob story.

Later at the hotel, Tyler worked out some last minute details for his marathon, debating whether or not he should cross the finish line with a fist pump or a jazz hands. “You already do that pose,” Paula and Zach laughed when he tried to demonstrate his technique. I didn’t know which he’d use, but I was gonna put my money on the old grab-the-camera-by-the-lens-and-yell-LOOK-AT-ME!!! pose.

“I’m glorious!!!”

The next morning at 5 AM, a nervous Tyler dragged his feet to the car. Turns out his stomach was hurting thanks to all the anxiety over the race. Well, it was that and his not-good-for-marathons dinner the night before. “He ate meat balls. He ate a sauced pasta dish with bread and oil,” Zach said. Yes, Tyler may have eaten all those things, BUT maybe that’s because he was so busy appreciating this meaningful experience that he full-on forgot to be wary of his diet. Besides, Zach should know better than to question Tyler’s judgment on something. Tyler’s always right, dammit!

Well, the good news was that Tyler threw up in the bathroom and now felt ready to compete. Luckily, he refrained from blowing chunks in the car. “That would have been a mess!” he noted. Hey vomit, you should have stayed in Tyler’s stomach, you low-life regurgitated bitch!

Tyler soon took his place at the starting line and told us he was ever so excited because he knew he had “a huge character test in front of me.” Well, this was more of a physical and mental endurance test. His time in Key West has been more of the character test, which so far, he’s failed pretty miserably.

Anyway, after the break, we found Tyler chugging along in the marathon, doing his waddle-run for thirteen miles, which really is quite impressive in and of itself — especially considering that my pace is more like sitting-in-a-chair. Nevertheless, as Tyler crossed the halfway point, he also passed his gang cheering him on. Yes, it was two seconds of cheer-tastic love. Thank goodness John and Janelle and Svetlana weren’t there! They would have ruined the whole thing!

Well, Tyler began to pick up his pace, soon flying by mile fifteen, then seventeen, and then nineteen. Yes, it was an effort that even Amanda Beard would have loved, but at mile twenty-three, with the finish line in sight, Tyler’s knee suddenly gave out. Would this be the end of his marathon dream? Not quite. The roommates all found him bent over, dealing with a medic, and through their positive spirit and boundless cheering, they motivated him to get up and run like a bunny! Plus, in a sign of cheesy but sweet solidarity, the gang ran with Tyler, letting him know that they all could do it together (insert Awww here). Personally, I’d be like “I didn’t come here to run. I came to stand and watch. See you at the finish line.”

With the catchy tunes of the All American Rejects playing in the background, Tyler eventually hobbled across the finish line with the impressive time of four hours, forty minutes, and forty-three seconds. By the power of RED GOD, that was a good time! At least, compared to my estimated time: twelve hours and thirty-four minutes.

In the end, Tyler learned a Very Important Lesson. He couldn’t just achieve things all on his own. Sometimes, he needed to ask for help, and that’s OKAY! “You know what Tyler?” he said in the third-person, “You need your roommates. You need them to help you.” And then, in a move that showed true growth, he wrote a burn book about his stubborn independence. Baby steps — or in the case of Tyler — baby waddles.

Meanwhile, back at the homestead, Janelle and John were not happy with the letters Tyler had written them. Huh. I wonder why. Maybe it’s because Tyler had written things like “I assumed that if you guys wanted to go, you would have come to me like the others.” Of course, Janelle keenly noted that with the other roommates, the subject of the marathon must have been voiced to them in some fashion, and as a result, they said “Yeah, we’d like to go.” Either way, both she and John were pissed that at no point in the letter was there any semblance of an apology. Just more lame justifications.

Later, as Tyler soaked in a bath upstairs, he talked again about how proud he was to hear Jose open up. This prompted Paula to say, “Damn Jose. You’re awesome.” She then added, “That being said, KISS MY ASS!!! KISS MY GODDAMN ASS, YOU AWESOME, AWESOME MAN!!!”

Tyler then happily commented, “It was a bonding weekend for the four of us,” which would have been nice had it not been at the expense of John, Janelle, and Svetlana’s feelings. I couldn’t help feeling like he was glad to have not only bonded with Zach, Jose, and Paula, but to have excluded the other three from the experience. Well, at a bar in downtown, John and Janelle complained more about Tyler, with John saying he was tired of being disappointed, and Janelle saying she wanted to teach Tyler how to be considerate of other people. I was really hoping this would all boil over in another argument, but I had a bad feeling this was all just going to peter out, especially when Janelle told us, “I’m really not the type of person to hold onto grudges, especially when it comes to close friends.” Yes, instead, she prefers to stare at people with a haughty look before rolling her eyes and marching away.

Anyway, the next day, Tyler waltzed out into the backyard, wearing glitter on his leg to see how it would look in the sun. Janelle, who was stretched out in a nearby cabana, called her boy over and said that the letter he had written was… “very nice.” Huh? What? C’mon, Janelle. That’s the best you can do? No head swivel? No finger wagging? I thought you hated the letter. Pushover!

Well, Janelle and Tyler had a nice little talk about the whole incident, and ultimately, she concluded that talking about problems resolves them. Wow! And with that, my Tivo put me out of my misery and cut off the episode. I don’t know how things ended up, but I imagine that from this point out, Tyler will always make sure to write his letter BEFORE he rudely excludes his friends from something, not AFTER.

What did you think about this episode?

Comments (33)
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33 Comments

1

BlueAspic

Posted August 7, 2006 at 9:55 am

Tyler needs to run his ass to a wood chipper, jump in and take his pretentious, egotistical, drama queen act with him. He’s an ass clown of enormous proportions.
2

the_shred

Posted August 7, 2006 at 10:19 am

i was pretty sure tyler was talking about pooping that morning in the car. maybe that’s just me, and the fact that i slightly enjoy talking about it.

also, at the restaurant, did anyone else notice the three non-marathonners drank water and tyler had soda?
3

MTV4ME

Posted August 7, 2006 at 11:09 am

I think I recall early on in this series that Janelle said she can hold a grudge to the point of absurdity. But, she certainly won’t hold one against Tyler. As evil as Janelle may seem, she’s no where near Tyler’s level.

Where does this guy get off thinking it’s alright to manipulate every single person in that house? Where do the rest of the housemates get off allowing him to do so?
4

natania

Posted August 7, 2006 at 11:12 am

I never get tired of the Low Life Bitches comments… Thanks B-Side…
5

hollabackboy

Posted August 7, 2006 at 11:59 am

This episode proves what an inconsiderate, backstabbing little bitch Tyler can be. Janelle’s supposedly his best friend in the house, and he can’t even offer her to go with them. And when she’s obviously offended, he becomes totally defensive and can’t even apologize right then and there. I mean, seriously, Tyler just sees it as the world completely revolves around him, and when people don’t ask to go and kiss his ass (even though they were barely informed) that means they don’t want to go. And that letter was so self-righteous and not even a decent apology. I hope one day someone just walks up to Tyler in the street and gives him a good punch to the face. Because if his roommates aren’t allowed to do it, somebody needs to.

I’m also glad that Jose opened up in this episode. It’s possible that he has a personality and some depth. But a nice, mellow guy like him gets overshadowed by all these outrageous, dramatic personalities. And besdies, wouldn’t this officially mark Zach as the wallflower now. Janelle has been getting many storylines, and Jose has had a few spotlight moments as well in past weeks. Zach hasn’t had his own episode in several weeks.
6

RealityMonkey

Posted August 7, 2006 at 12:59 pm

B-Side, your observation of Tyler sounding like a college applicant with his grandiose comments is all too accurate. I was thinking all along that he sounded like a bad 19th century novel, but this is even better!
7

sarah

Posted August 7, 2006 at 1:35 pm

I really hate Tyler, but I really love your observations about him. Oh, and please keep up the ‘low-life bitch’ comments. They get me everytime.
8

gasmgrrl

Posted August 7, 2006 at 1:42 pm

I am writing this comment with me head hanging in shame. After all the time I spent loving and defending Tyler, I am forced to admit that he is a whiney, petty, bitch. I feel so betrayed!

Seriously, I am usually amused by his outbursts, but this whole incident with the “invite only” was so unnecessary! It’s not like Tyler was throwing a white party it was a dman marathon!

Now I have no one to like on this season of RW
Zach: overly earnest; suffers from severe diarrhea of the mouth

Paula: poster girl for domestic abuse and eating disorders. this girl should not be on tv

Svitz: spoiled, obnoxious, rich bitch (who should have stayed in Philly)

John: Lord of the frat daddies
Jose: too painfully vanilla for words

Janelle: another eye-rolling, neck weaving, angry black woman embarassing us all. We’re not all angry I swear!

And now Tyler, my one hold out for someone interesting on RW, has exceeded my limit for suckatude.

At least I still have The Challenge…
9

antebellum

Posted August 7, 2006 at 2:29 pm

hollabackboy, you know if someone punched Tyler in the street he would immediately label it gaybashing. Remember, he is “gay Tyler”… so persecuted.

Great recap, B-Side. One of your best, I believe. Tyler’s pompousness and bravado is unbelievable. I loved how he pretty much admitted that he only cares about himself. When he and Janelle were arguing, he pretty much said it was all about him. Classic. You gotta love The Real World.

The “I can’t believe no one’s paying attention to me right now.” and “I’m glorious!” screencaps were the best. And I never get tired of “low-life BITCH!” or “KISS MY ASS!!” At least we can thank this season for several catchphrases.
10

tvaholic

Posted August 7, 2006 at 2:45 pm

B-side, all you missed was more of the Tyler love fest with John & Janelle, as Tyler played with the glitter, trying to get it on John & then John tackled Tyler into the pool & they all lived happily ever after. Why does everyone suck up to Tyler, I don’t get it!! Oh please, Tyler, join the challenges after this show so Coral can whoop your ass!
11

gopluto

Posted August 7, 2006 at 2:48 pm

Long time reader–first time poster.

I just have to comment, as a marathon runner (I’m glorious!!), that Tyler was bullshitting about “doctors only let people run two marathons a year.” Big surprise, I know.

Hal Higdon, one of the best running coaches in the US, ran one marathon a month for seven months the year he turned 70! Many people run multiple marathons per year. Yes, most people who run marathons do not do them as often as that, but no doctors are NOT ALLOWING it!

I just hate his know-it-all attitude. You’re an idiot, Tyler! Quit embarassing all us other runners!

And by the way, b-side, thanks for giving me a new marathon mantra. I always like to have a phrase to repeat when the race gets difficult. From now on, my official mantra is, “KISS MY ASS, MARATHON! KISS MY GODDAMN ASS!!”
12

motown

Posted August 7, 2006 at 3:12 pm

THANK YOU, GOPLUTO!!! As soon as the moron made that comment about doctor’s limiting the number of marathons a person can run in a year I wanted to run to tvgasm and blast him!
As a competitive runner from age 5 thru college I want to thank you, B-Side, for commenting on his waddle-run. His doctor probably won’t let him run more than two becuase he runs like…I don’t even know what. But not an athlete.
He makes me want to kick my television.
B-Side, your recaps rock!!
13

anniedawg25

Posted August 7, 2006 at 3:36 pm

The first pic of Tyler is so funny! It perfectly captures his sheer shrewdness and bitchiness.

I agree, Tyler’s “run” was very waddle-like, and somewhat flat footed. Don’t even get me started on his choice of marathon outfit. Did you notice his ratty-ass shoes too?! But at the same time….I have never ran a marathon of ANY KIND in my life (unless you wanna count shopping till you drop) so I can’t talk to much crap about that.

Over all this ep was very lame and boring. Yawn!

…although reading about Tyler’s pre run dinner make me kinda hungry.
14

Feminem

Posted August 7, 2006 at 3:54 pm

I have never posted before but I read this site constantly. First of all, B-Side you are freaking hilarious. Second, like some others that have posted, I too am a runner and as usual Tyler is full of overly dramatic B.S. Of course you can run more than 2 in a year! Hell, there is a guy right now running 1 full marathon a day for 50 days straight to raise awareness about rebuilding New Orleans. And he is doing fine!
I will never tire of the low life bitch comments.
15

BethW

Posted August 8, 2006 at 4:09 am

I honestly hate how Tyler gets away with everything. It seems like everybody is so scared of becoming the next Svetlana that no matter how rude and pompous Tyler is, they will forgive him once the passionate part of the arguement has worn down.
He’s been through so much! He’s achieved even more! Bullshit. The only thing Tyler has is arrogance.
I really hope that somebody calls him out at the Reunion Show.
16

BonaFide

Posted August 8, 2006 at 7:49 am

It just struck me that this is the first season of the RW where I get upset when conflicts between roommates are resolved. (Seriously, I used to prefer to watch mellow Jacques on RW San Diego get along with everybody as opposed to angry Karamo wanting to slash people’s throats on RW Philly.) I just hate it when roommates get upset with Tyler’s behavior but then let it slide. He is so full of bullshit that it’s impossible (even for Janelle) to win an argument against him!

I am so glad that B-Side pointed out the look on Tyler’s face when Jose was opening up to the group. He was so upset that Jose was stealing the spotlight from him! I agree with Paula that Jose is awesome. Jose doesn’t get much camera time because he is the most “normal” person in the house, and considering his background as compared to his roommates’, he’s even more awesome. I’d take ‘vanilla’ over ‘crazy’ any day!

Like B-Side, I’ve also warmed up to Janelle over the past couple weeks. Her considerable bitchiness appears slight in the shadow of Tyler’s. I have some serious doubts that any RW alumnus would be able to take him – even Coral!

Very funny recap, B-Side. Thanks!
17

KristinMichelle

Posted August 8, 2006 at 8:19 am

I am not a Tyler-lover… but… I actually understood where he was coming from in this episode. The only reason the race was even a big deal was because it was out of town and the roomies would have to stay overnight. Had it been in Key West, no one would have cared whether they were invited or not. I am under the impression that no one gets to just leave at their whim, so a free pass to get out of the house would be like gold to them. I think Tyler was trying to prevent the other roommates like John and Svetlana from using his marathon as an excuse to get out of the house. We have seen enough of these people to deduce that John would have turned it into a bender of a weekend and Svetlana would have brought her Philly drama with her. I think Tyler wanted to avoid all that so he could focus. Furthermore, he said about five times that he didn’t invite anyone… they ASKED if they could go, which means that they took some interest in it besides the free ticket out of the house. Even Jose said he wasn’t invited. Janelle kept harping on the fact that she wasn’t invited, but she didn’t seem to listen to him when he kept saying that no one was. I have a feeling that Janelle and Tyler’s relationship goes no farther than their mutual love for gossip and passing judgment on people, so it would make sense that Janelle would not have taken her own initiative to ask Tyler if he would like for her to come. Having said all that, Tyler is the most self-congratulatory person ever and he didn’t even finish the damn race…
18

realitylover

Posted August 8, 2006 at 9:13 am

KristinMichelle, I’m totally with you on this one.

It seems obvious that Jose, Paula and Zach all asked Tyler to go to the marathon. The fact that Janelle didn’t know that he was running a marathon just showed how self-absorbed she is… I mean how can you not notice when your “closest friend” is running for 2 to 4 hour stretches to train? So if she really cared, she could have asked him about it earlier and been with the group that went.

I’m not saying that Tyler isn’t a completely self-righteous ass (because obviously he is).. but I don’t blame him for not wanting people at his marathon who never even bothered to ask him about it before they found out everyone else was leaving town.
19

BonaFide

Posted August 8, 2006 at 10:30 am

KristenMichelle = realitylover?
20

Chee-Z-TeeVee Addict

Posted August 8, 2006 at 1:04 pm

I didn’t think it was possible to loathe Tyler any more than I already did, but it is and I do!

Tyler is so self-involved he doesn’t even realize how contradictory he is. He blathers on about needing to have “focus” without being distracted by drama, and then proceeds to create a completely unnecessary melodrama.

I can’t believe he actually thinks he has the right to tell other adults where they can and can’t go. He did the same thing to Johnny Bananas when he tried to place conditions on him about attending the Amanda Beard fiasco. What a f-cking tool.

I thought Janelle handled the whole thing pretty well, until she let him off the hook at the end. WHY do they ALL do that? Svetlana is the only one who has stood her ground, and he has completely succeeded in isolating her from the other roommates.

I hate Tyler’s self-congratulatory demeanor. EVERYTHING he does is SOOOO special, and unique! I hope his brothers beat the living shit out of him everyday of his life – I really do. I also hope all his friends and family who watched his nasty, immature and cruel behavior have enough sense to let him know how disgusted they are.

I wish JB, Janelle and Svetlana would have had the balls to tell him that if he was going to plan exclusionary events, then he did not have the right to use a communal vehicle. I wonder how “supportive” Zach, Nutball and Jose would have been if they had to endure a long, hot bus ride, especially with a narcisstic bitch like Tyler?

Nutball’s baby voice is driving me up the wall! I’ll bet she was using her “big-girl” voice when she was gnashing her teeth on her boyfriend. I hate her as much as I hate Tyler – she is goofy bitch. I STILL think she is a fuckweasel – I hope she’s getting beaten right now.
21

zevonia

Posted August 8, 2006 at 9:48 pm

Chee-Z-TeeVee Addict, you have an awful lot of anger. I’m betting there is someone in your family or your life that Tyler & Paula remind you of and that’s why all the vitriolic comments. I mean, B-Side wrote a wicked funny recap that should have made you laugh not wish violence on others. I’m sure you’re not really an unpleasant person that thinks people deserve to be beaten. It’s just a tv show that’s edited for the maximum drama. Lighten up.
I think the others let Tyler slide for the same reason they let Paula slide. It’s a lot easier than being angry all the time. Especially when you have to live and work with someone. Thanks for the recap, B-Side! Especially the pictures!
22

Chee-Z-TeeVee Addict

Posted August 8, 2006 at 11:36 pm

Zevonia,

I was joking about the beatings.

But, I’m very appreciative that your staying on top of my mental health!

PS – I STILL hate Tyler and Paula. They’re obnoxious. That’s just my opinion.
23

BonaFide

Posted August 9, 2006 at 4:56 am

“I mean, B-Side wrote a wicked funny recap that should have made you laugh not wish violence on others. I’m sure you’re not really an unpleasant person that thinks people deserve to be beaten.”

zevonia, I think YOU’RE the one who needs to lighten up! Chee-Z-TeeVee’s comments were hilarious!
24

alligatorwings

Posted August 9, 2006 at 11:01 am

LOL Cheez–
First you get bashed for being hyper analytical and mature, and now for being too agressive and immature in your comments. You cant win!!!!!
Ive been in Mexico City the past couple of weeks, so I havent seen the last couple of episodes. Looks like this one is classic Tyler. Even GasmGrrl has had a change of heart with evil bitch Tyler!
All the comments about him waddling is a huge laugh. He DOES waddle…and since his last name is Duckworth, it fits him perfectly!!!!!!!!! I wonder if he swims like a duck too???? WADDLE WADDLE WADDLE LOL
25

alligatorwings

Posted August 9, 2006 at 11:17 am

Heres a chunk of interview with Tyler about how he was purely a victim of editing, due to the fact that three other castmates were –duds–simply too boring and therefore had to utilize and manipulate more of the ever fabulous Tyler to make it entertaining. And he spent all his mornings training and doing charity work (because hes SUCH a humanitarian), but they never showed any of that. Note how he also thought by manipulating the editors of the show that he was going to be portrayed favorably. WHATEVER. For him its all about being the center of attention, whatever it takes….

TD: Exactly. I take it all as one big joke. I don’t take myself seriously at all.

RVM: Well, with that story, how could you. And now that we’re on to sex, perfect time to segue to The Real World. On the Web, I love how they have labeled you “mischievous,” “manipulative.” Apt words to describe you or bullshit?

TD: As a TV character, it works perfectly. They’ve edited me into what they wanted, and that’s what I am for them. We all have positive and negative attributes, so I would say yes, I can be extremely mischievous. And I can be manipulative too. We all can.

RVM: Going into the experience, did you pretty much know they were going to edit you to be what they wanted in a character or were you naÃ¯ve to the whole process?

TD: I knew they did it to some people, but I was like, ˜Oh, they’re not going to get me. I’ve done TV production, I’ve edited. I know they can’t do that to me, and they wont want to.’ I was really friendly with production. I was the easiest one of the cast because I understood their job. I’d done it before. I thought, ˜we’ll just all be friends and they wont edit me poorly.’ Not the case. In the Real World production, they call it duds, and our season got three of them. I’m not going to name names, but three of the people just didn’t invest in the process. They kind of checked out. So that left them with only four people to get story lines from.

RVM: I remember watching the first two episodes of the season with friends in Vegas, and I remember looking at Svetlana and thinking, ˜That girl’s fucking crazy. She’s gonna lose it.’ And then we talked about you and said, ˜Wow. The gay guy’s an asshole.’ And that’s totally how they wanted it. They wanted her to not be able to handle you.

TD: They wanted a rivalry, and they haven’t had a good Real World rivalry in a long time, this is gonna be good. And the funny thing is, most of the time, I didn’t have any time for the bitch. I was off at swim practice every morning at 5am. I did a lot of volunteering during that time. But they don’t show any of that. They just show me telling her to shut the hell up when she got on my nerves. So it’s funny when people tell me, ˜You’re so mean.’ I’m not mean. Imagine if you had to live and work with someone you didn’t like. You’d tell them to shut up.

RVM: Well, and they can manipulate a scenario to seem a whole lot more dramatic than it is.

TD: Look, I don’t want to blame the editing. But the fact of the matter is, I can give my friend Janelle on the show a dirty look as a joke, and three months later they can edit it into me looking at Svetlana. You can do anything with editing, and I take my hat off to them. They have done a wonderful job editing drama out of this season because, trust me, it was not the most exciting season. But you know, whatever, at the end of the day, I’m also like the reality TV villain of the year, so I get more press than they do. So at the end of the day, I win.

RVM: So what’s next for you?

TD: A lot of stuff. I’m moving out to LA for good, joining the West Hollywood swim team. I’m moving to pursue Sports Broadcasting, on camera. Before, I never thought I could do that as an openly gay man. But the Real World basically ripped and shredded my personality for the enjoyment of America, so, I think I’m confident enough now. I can go on TV as an openly gay guy. And I’m starting an organization for gay youth. We’re trying to set up a comprehensive networking Web site for out and closeted athletes, as well as a comprehensive guide to all of the athletic departments of every major university in the United States to try and see how safe it is.
26

BonaFide

Posted August 9, 2006 at 12:14 pm

So I had NO idea that Tyler was featured prominently in People magazine’s Hottest Bachelors issue. I mean… what the fuck!
27

zevonia

Posted August 9, 2006 at 1:01 pm

Sorry, Chee-Z-TeeVee Addict, didn’t realize you were joking. Without personally knowing you, it was kind of hard to tell.
I can’t say I like Tyler or Paula much either but there’s still editing to be considered. I realize it sounds like a cop out when Tyler says it, especially because he can be such a prick but it would also explain why the other roomies don’t take him down. If a great deal of this drama is manufactured by editing then maybe the room mates get along much better than it would seem. Considering we only see a very tiny fraction of the show that’s a distinct possibility. Thanks for the interview snippits, alligatorwings- is there a link?
28

Chee-Z-TeeVee Addict

Posted August 9, 2006 at 1:11 pm

LOL! LOL! BonaFide and alligatorwings!

I read that interview too, and I was cracking up! “I don’t want to blame editing, BUT…!” “I tried to be friends with production, so I wouldn’t be edited poorly… yada yada yada…!”

I’ll bet the production crew laughed their asses off. Matt from RW: Hawaii tried to do the same thing, and after the show aired the producers came right out and said he tried to manipulate the crew. Their comment was basically that Matt was probably going to very be surprised at how others viewed him, and they stood by the fact that they accurately portrayed his (poor) character.

Hottest Bachelor? From what Ducky’s been saying he STILL can’t get a date – I guess Pretty Poison is still poison. I imagine Ducky’s life gets a little less ducky with every new episode – good. Now PLEASE can someone commence the beatings? LOL (indicating humor)!

Glad your back alligatorwings – I wondered where you went! Hope MC was fun – I’ve only flown through there a couple of times
29

Chee-Z-TeeVee Addict

Posted August 9, 2006 at 1:25 pm

Thanks Zevonia!

No hard feelings on my end – I am admittedly obsessed with this season! And I LOVE talking about it!

Plus, I usually really enjoy your comments – I think your funny.

All of my friends, and husband, think I’m a half-wit for watching this show – so I have to get my TVgasm Blog fixes in or I go nuts!
30

Chee-Z-TeeVee Addict

Posted August 9, 2006 at 10:04 pm

Another self-effacing and modest interview with the Duck Man:

1st Quote

DW: An openly gay sportscaster? Hmmm¦give me a minute to wrap my mind around that one.

TD: Yeah we’ve never had one. Before I did Real World I worked in TV production, but I never thought I’d have the opportunity to be on camera. Then after the show I became empowered and I thought, ˜It’s 2006! Why shouldn’t we have an openly gay sportscaster?’. I’m just as smart, I know just as much about sports and furthermore I’m actually more clever.

2nd Quote

TD: Exactly. And I’m on to how the game is played and I’m taking it all the way to the bank. You can edit me into being a villain, but I’m the one getting all the press and I’m the one who everyone’s going to remember.

Holy delusions of grandeur, Batman!

http://www.365gay.com/entertainment/tv/080106tv.html
31

TimOD

Posted August 10, 2006 at 6:27 am

With a time of four hours, forty minutes, and forty-three seconds I’m pretty sure Tyler would be the only person at the Special Olympics to not get a medal.
32

GoldCrayon

Posted August 10, 2006 at 10:47 am

That is a pretty crappy time. I can run a mile in about 5 minutes.
33

ncgirl

Posted August 11, 2006 at 8:26 am

you guys are tough- i think 5 hours is pretty good for a marathon. and i’ve read too that for most people, more than 2 marathons is not good for the body. of course there are some ulramarathoners who do much more but for most people, more than 2 a year is not recommended